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The view in front of him seemed endless. How long had he been down in these infinite tunnels?
Every day felt real, so goddamn real to Ze, until it wasn’t.
That Moe was not his Moe, and that ReGect definitely was not his ReGect. They were wrong. The little out of place things made the entirety of them displaced. How could he have not known right away? He felt horrible every time the thought of him not being able to tell if his friends were cheap copies or not crossed his mind.
What was worse was the intimacy he shared with the copies, more in specific; the fake ReGect. Every move he built up the courage to make was quite literally nothing but overshared vulnerability to a stranger. This realization made Ze absolutely nauseous.
He kept walking through the eye straining bedrock texture splattered on the walls. He had to stay focused, not rambling on and on to himself in his head like some sort of deranged sicko.
He was unconsciously limping, due to the fact of twisting his ankle during his attempt of running from his “problems.”
“Still wandering around like a pathetic dog?”
Ze’s stomach twisted into a gut wrenching knot. That voice was the equivalent to a terrible song forming into an ear-worm, a voice that he dreaded to ever hear again.
“I knew you’d grow up to be like this, weak, lost, and a disappointment.”
He turned to confront the voice, only to be met with the warmth of a fireplace.
This place, he knew this place very well. He took in his surroundings for a few moments. Home. He was home, but how did he get here? Wasn’t he just in the-
“LOOK AT ME WHEN I TALK TO YOU.”
Ze flinched at the familiar sound of a large fist hitting the table he expected to be behind him.
He looked to face who was talking to him. It was his father. But no, it couldn’t have been. Nothing about the blurred picture of a face in front of him was even the slightest bit hereditary.
It was almost like his mind couldn’t remember his own father’s face. It wasn’t like he wanted to, the thought of seeing his dad again sparked memories that weren’t easy to be put out.
“Do you think I chose to have an unsuccessful son? Why is it that you can’t do anything right?”
These words provoked tears from Ze’s eyes. It wasn’t long until a loud smack shook the walls of the room, then following with the hot stinging on the side of his face.
The force and suddenness sent him to the floor with a small yelp. His hands went to his cheek. Not only to ease the pain, but to hide the growing shame on his face.
“Can’t even defend yourself properly. I didn’t raise a faggot. Now get up, you’re embarrassing me.”
Ze woke up in a cold sweat.
His skin was beyond the definition of clammy and his head felt like it was about to cave in.
He wasn’t in the hole, or back in that hell house; He was in his bed. This hadn’t been the first “nightmare,” this was just a new one to add to the bunch.
After a few moments of re-associating, he peeled the blankets off of his body and swung his legs to the side of the bed. His throat was unimaginably dry. He wasn’t even sure if it was due to fear, or just sleeping with his mouth open like a loser.
What he was sure of, was that he needed to get water without waking Moe or ReGect. Speaking of the two,
were they really Moe and ReGect?. .
The thought was silly, but the previous dream seemed to taunt his mind otherwise.
He could go check on them. Yeah, that’s what he should do. He didn’t have to be loud while doing it either. Just open the door and check, right? Easy enough.
Before he could get sidetracked again, he dragged his gross body off of the bed and padded into the hallway.
Despite his plan on being quiet, the floorboards still creaked all the same, and his breathing was pretty loud once he realized it. Something about the noises gave Ze some kind of closure that he was real, but not enough to cover up what had happened in the hole.
ReGects room was the closest to where he stood. He would rather check on Moe first, but her room was closer to the bathroom, seeing how she insisted that she needed to be close to the bathroom to get ready in the mornings, and the other two didn’t mind much. What did they know? They weren’t girls, and Moe was always right.
It took a while on deciding, but he ended up going to Moe’s room. She wouldn’t kill him if she woke up and saw him there, unlike some dumbfuck named ReGect.
Ze had finally made it to Moe’s door. Just one look was all he needed to know she was okay (and real). He slotted his fingers inbetween the crack of the door, and his eyes immediately connected to the lump of comforter blanketing her.
He stared for a while, trying a few times to be sure she was breathing normally. Once he was satisfied, he closed the door the best he could without making noise, then made his way downstairs.
He desperately needed water. He still wasn’t sure why he was so insanely thirsty. He stepped into the kitchen, using a counter top to help guide his body.
He was getting tired again. No, not tired; dizzy. His head started spinning. Was he still in the hole? Was this all just some sort of sick joke perfectly played out by the thing that resided down there? His hands fumbled with the cabinet each time he tried to wrap his hand around the handle.
“Why are you up?”
Ze let out a small startled gasp, then quickly cocked his head to the direction of the voice. There stood ReGect, his eyes halfway closed due to exhaustion. He stared into the entities eyes.
He had never really payed attention to his body language when he was tired, he originally assumed that it would’ve been similar as to a humans.
This was perfect new material to make fun of him for.
Despite the stupidness of how he looked, something about how he stared, or how his eyelids hooded over his eyes…
It was kind of cute… Cute?! Way to catch his mind getting cocky, what was he thinking?
“I uh, needed some water.”
ReGect stared for a few more moments, then moved into the Kitchen as well.
Ze continued to try- and miserably fail at opening the cabinet with his shaky fingers, until something warm grabbed ahold of his hand, helping him pull on the handle.
It took a few moments for him to realize that it was ReGect helping him. The entity didn’t say a word, just carefully pulled Ze’s hand off of the handle and down to his side, grabbing two cups from the shelf, then closing the cabinet.
He stared dumbfounded at ReGect for his gentle demeanor. This was weird, really weird. ReGect was always either getting pissed or pissing Ze off; being annoying as shit and stuff, but why was he so different right now?
Ze’s mind started to spin in loopy circles. What if this wasn’t the real ReGect, and the Moe he saw sleeping was just another fake to mess with his brain? The thought even crossing his mind made his stomach tie itself into a knot.
His spiraling thoughts came to a halt as a glass of water was held infront of him. He stared yet again, trying to process what was happening.
“Are you gonna like.. take it, or are you just going to keep staring like an idiot?”
Nope. Still the real ReGect. He let out a relieved sigh in his mind, then awkwardly took the glass from ReGects grasp.
“You’re being weird..” he noted quietly, fingers tapping on the side of the glass.
“Am I not allowed to help you??” He blurted out, almost sounding offended.
Ze rolled his eyes and decided to space out on a window that resided on the other side of the room, imagining what could possibly be out there; what there was to hurt him.
He heard an exaggerated sigh escape ReGects mouth. He looked back towards the entity, who was slouched over the countertop, elbows propping himself up.
Something seemed wrong. ReGect seemed as if he was upset, Ze just couldn’t put his finger on what exactly was bothering him.
A few minutes of an uncomfortable silence went by, until ReGect decided to clear the air.
“I want you to talk to me.”
Ze stared at the entities back. “Nobody starts a conversation like that..”
ReGect let out an irritated growl. “You know that’s not what I meant!” He paused for a minute, gathering his thoughts.
“I know you’ve been struggling with some things ever since the whole thing..”
“You know nothing.”
Ze was quick to reply. As soon as he heard those words his mind put up its walls. There was no way he would get vulnerable infront of anyone, especially ReGect. If he had to be honest, he never knew why he’d get so defensive when people tried to help him. It’s not like he needed it; he could do things by himself. ReGect scoffed.
“Ze I’ve worked for… it… I know what it’s capable of, and I know it fucked you up.” He turned to face Ze.
“So what if it did? I was fine when I came out, and I’m fine now.”
“No you aren’t.” His eye narrowed. “you can’t just act like nothing happened when you know how much holding it in is hurting you!”
Something about ReGects words set something off in Ze’s head. Why was he so set on helping him? He was making it clear that he could do things himself.
“Why can’t you just let this go?”
“Why are you so afraid of being human??”
“IM NOT FUCKING AFRAID!”
Silence hung in air like a nauseating haze.
He yelled.
He didn’t mean to yell,
especially when it was the middle of the night and there was the possibility of waking Moe up. But he was angry, and that was an emotion that was not easy for Ze to take control of. He focused back to ReGect, who was staring at him with a concerned look.
“I’m going back to bed.” Ze grumbled, before gulping down the last of his water and slamming the empty glass on the counter to emphasize his point.
“No you’re not.”
“Excuse me?”
Before Ze could fully turn to ReGect, he felt a large claw firmly grasp his arm.
“What are you-“
Not even a few seconds later and he was quickly enveloped in ReGects arms.
“Let go of me!” Ze struggled against his grip.
He struggled for a while; throwing a few punches here and there, but ReGect didn’t budge. From then on, Ze’s scratching and grunting came at a slower pace, and continued to slow until he came to a stop. Falling limp in ReGects hold, he sat there huffing and catching his breath.
He sat like this for a while.
He thought of letting go, he was strong enough to push ReGect away at the right moment,
but once his breathing turned into a choked sob he knew there was no going back.
He was warm. His short fur was surprisingly a lot softer than Ze expected. He had never felt ReGect like this before, it was a new feeling that actually comforted him, rather than scaring him.
After a whole week of disassociation and paranoia, this was a big weight let off of his shoulders. Even if this wasn’t real, it still gave him some form of hope.
As the entity let him shamelessly cry like a baby into his chest, he guided Ze’s hand into his own, squeezing tightly.
“You shouldn’t feel the need to hide anything from me…” He spoke in a gentle tone.
Ze pressed the side of his face into ReGects pec. Was the position weird? More than describable, but he was more focused on the fact that this was real.
He wouldn’t have to fear if his friends were real or not.
Not for now.