Work Text:
Padfoot jumped forward with a loud, happy bark, planting his front paws on the ground.
They thought Sirius being in his Animagus form to welcome Regulus' first transformation would somehow help, but turned out they couldn't have been more wrong. The dog's body flattened as soon as he realised Regulus considered him as a sudden threat, but barely able to hide his excitement, his tail still thumped so hard against the Forbidden Forest' floor it made the moss unstable.
Stop that!
Regulus retreated as small as possible. Knowing who was in front of him behind the bark and behind the tail made no difference, instincts kicked in from Salazar knew where.
His newly acquired fur stood on end and listing everything quietly in his head, Regulus rapidly came to the conclusion he had four paws too and could see in the dark, but he had no fucking idea what he was supposed to be. He had major ambitions that didn't quite fit his current tiny size, and though Sirius' Animagus had always looked impressive as a black dog and wasn't new, seeing from his much smaller perspective made his stomach twist.
Padfoot could swallow him in one bite if he wanted.
Regulus was pretty certain he had seen dogs wrapping lesser living beings in their mouth just to play—or was it cuteness aggression? He had no idea, really, he had never been a dog-person himself, no mater how much of an exception Sirius as Padfoot was.
“It's okay, it's okay,” said Sirius once he returned to his human form. “I should have thought about it. Merlin, I can't believe it—Reggie, aw. You finally did it! Look at you! This is absolutely perfect, I know someone who will be thrilled.”
Sirius' cuteness aggression didn't reassure Regulus any better.
A hiss didn't impress his brother. The git laughed it off and stretched his hands towards him. He easily scooped Regulus up and lifted him above his head, turning him gently while inspecting every inch with a wide smile and delighted eyes.
“Yeah. If you could look at you!”
Tell me what I am, you idiot. What do you see? How do I look?
Perhaps Regulus was a fox? A young one or like, a fennec fox? They were cute but still looked sly enough, he wouldn't mind the gigantic ears.
Or was he something else entirely that could fit in Sirius' hands? Perhaps something related to dogs just to match with his brother, which would explain why he seemed too happy about Regulus for once?
Not his preference, but Regulus had always sought the connexion with his brother more than anything and certainly more than he would admit aloud. Even though they couldn't be any more different, Regulus looked up to Sirius and if fate decided he was a dog too, then he was a dog.
At fifteen, Regulus still wanted his approval and most of all, he wanted to be seen.
He had followed him in the middle of the night to the Potters in a heartbeat before he could understand what was really going on after all. And he did, because Sirius asked, shaking him awake from Morpheus' arms with that tilt of his head and those puppy eyes, and Regulus had grabbed what he could without questioning anything.
There was an itch sometimes, buried in the deep layers of himself, to be like his brother. He was taller and easily likeable. Yet, other times Regulus wished they could simply have more in common.
Understanding each other was a pain in the ass and they both sucked at it. Regulus couldn't understand for the life of him why Sirius liked trouble. Why he was so loud, and why he needed so many people around him at all time. But Sirius didn't make any more effort to see why Regulus was still attached to their name. That he liked to play with the fear it instilled and the doors it opened. Regulus wouldn't spit on it, nor he would refuse any opportunity it gave him, and it had the annoying knack of infuriating Sirius to no end. Not his fault he was no prankster. Regulus was a scholar and a scholar he'd remain.
But maybe… his brother was exactly why Regulus was standing here today. Doing something as illegal as becoming an Animagus.
If it meant spending time with Sirius—and by that, Regulus meant good time, hours together without being interrupted by one of Sirius' stupid friends and hours that never ended up in a fight, he would do it again and over again.
“Bet, Mother would faint if she knew,” Sirius laughed and Salazar, it sounded like a weird cackling. Regulus' ears flattened on his head. “Maybe we should tell her. Good riddance and all that,” he snorted to himself then, taking the direction of the castle. “But first, let's find Remus. He needs to know—You don't mind him seeing you like that, do you? You guys get along, right?”
Would it change anything if Regulus say no?
Not only he couldn't reply, he had no idea how to shift back to his human form. Sirius forgot to mention how. But it wouldn't even be true, if he refused. Remus was indeed quite alright to bear.
The Great Hall was still well-lit and crowded when they made it back. Given the current rush to the stairs, they had missed dinner by a few and Regulus realised he was nowhere near being a fox. Everyone ignored them. Surely, a fox in one of their classmates' arms would catch some eyes.
Perhaps he was a bat? It didn't suite his perfect vision and he didn't have wings, but it suited his size. Regulus had no feathers so being a bird was totally out of the equation, and a raccoon, as Barty suggested when Regulus was still toying with the leaf in his mouth, was far too big and borderline to roam unnoticed in Hogwarts. But what about a marten? Or a weasel? Regulus could feel pointy teeth against his tongue.
Oh no. What if he was a hedgehog?
“Don't worry, if Remus didn't save us something, we'll pop in the kitchens later,” said Sirius, absently scratching between Regulus' ears.
Regulus closed his eyes despite himself. Not a hedgehog then, or Sirius wouldn't have been able to do that. But somehow it didn't feel less awful because Sirius' scratches suddenly made being carried… tolerable.
“The elves always keep nice stuff, you'll see. They're always so willing when you ask nicely.”
I always ask them nicely, Regulus retorted in his head, yet not as fast as the arm that wrapped around Sirius' neck and yanked them both backward.
“Hey Pads!” James called after he barged out of a classroom Regulus swore was just empty. “What kept you from dinner? We've been looking for you everywhere!”
“You don't have the map?”
“Wormy has it,” James said. “No idea where's the lad gone either. He said something about a prank involving a Ravenclaw but nothing more than that, and Moony told me I don't need to always know everything and why, and to mind my own business this time, but then he looked embarrassed when he didn't know any better where you went and—oh.”
James tilted his head, finally reduced to silence.
He could yap for hours, a trait Regulus had learned since then that he shared with his mother. Not that he minded it one bit. It was more enticing than he ever thought it would be when Sirius forced them to cohabit, but Regulus would rather die, be buried, and forgotten, than to let anyone know he could perfectly listen to James ramble for as long as the Gryffindor saw fit.
“Who's that little cutie?” James asked with a short nod at Regulus—or, what Regulus was.
“That? Found him outside when I was Padfoot.”
Sirius lifted him with one hand, which meant Regulus was not only small but he was a light-weight too and his brother was clearly having way too much fun with this.
At least, James seemed to like it no better than Regulus. “Maybe don't do that?”
Right? Don't!
“Prongs…”
“What if he's hurt?”
“He's fine,” Sirius huffed, but still brought Regulus back down. “Look.”
“Merlin's tits, he's so tiny,” James muttered as he leaned in closer, meeting a hissing Regulus at eye-level. Tiny? Now Regulus was getting properly offended at his own Animagus form. His tail—he had a tail!—flicked in irritation. “Don't play with him like that, Pads. What if you drop him?”
“I'm not going to drop him. Relax.”
“Hm,” James hummed, risking a hand forward to scratch below Regulus' chin. “Did you make sure there was no others where you found him?”
“Yeah. Seemed like he was all alone.”
“Thank God you were out as Padfoot, he's so black it's a miracle you even spotted him. Who knew what could have happened…”
The pleasant scratch on his chin turned into a more pleasant scratch behind the ear.
Regulus instinctively leaned into it. James was soft in his touch and he couldn't help but rub his nose against his hand. Remus might be the less idiotic of Sirius' friends but James… James always made him feel nice and warm, spreading heat in the pit of his stomach, and making him all mellow when he was nearby. Regulus used to snap at Remus, and he would gladly snap at Peter and the others if needed, but Regulus could never snap at James.
He had kind brown eyes and he was… Salazar. It was embarrassing that Sirius could now see that his best friend affected Regulus in every way.
“Can I take him?”
No.
Alarmed, Regulus opened his eyes and double-glanced at his brother only to see him shrug. “Sure.”
Hands immediately stole him from Sirius' grip at that. They were careful, but all Regulus had time to see before he ended up comfortable settled in the open of James' uniform jumper was a smirk from Sirius.
“Don't be scared, it's okay,” James said when he snarled. “None of us bite, not even that big dog over here.”
“Who are you calling a dog, Prongsie?”
“We'll take good care of you until we find your owner,” James ignored him, still scratching the spot behind Regulus' ear.
Sirius rolled his eyes. “Looks too wild to belong to anyone if you ask me.”
“How would you know?” A gentle hand flattened Regulus' fur. “I think our friend is just intimidated. It's your doggy genes, Pads, you often come off as unstable.”
Take that, Sirius.
“Not to mention you threw him in the air. I'd be pissed too if I were him, right Sunshine?”
“Don't call him that.”
“What, Sunshine?” James looked down at Regulus. “What about Shadowbeans? Hm, just Shadow? Whiskers?”
Sirius flipped James off. “These names suck. Piss off.”
Slowly petting Regulus, James laughed. He kept flattening his fur carefully, making sure Regulus relax. One steady stroke became two, then three. By the fifth, a low rumble rose from Regulus' chest and sooner than he could blink, his whole body started melting into a puddle. James felt good but more than that, now that Regulus had his nose tucked into the other boy's Gryffindor jumper, James smelled incredible.
“Look at him,” James whispered, a smile in his voice. “Sorry not sorry, he just likes me better than he likes you.”
“Hm. Is Moony back in our common room?”
“Yup. Why?” Avoiding Sirius' attempt to take Regulus back, James added, “You gave him away, remember? He's mine now.”
“If you say so.” Sirius started walking backward toward the Gryffindor Tower, his annoying smirk growing wider as he watched them. Too bad James found all the best spots to scratch, Regulus could have clawed it off his face otherwise. “I just want to show Moony the little one before you keep him all to yourself, let's go. Oh, and,” catching James smoothly by the shoulder when he arrived at his level, “take it to our dorms alright but play nice, behave yourself.”
Regulus lifted his head and glared back.
His brother was a prick. A full-on prick whose implicit warning was definitely not for James.
“It's a kitten, Pads,” James elbowed Sirius off him with a laugh. “You know I'm not going to harm a kitten.”
In the small cage of his ribs, Regulus' heart missed a beat. Finally, he had an answer to a question he almost forgot along the way. He was a cat. A kitten, sure, but a cat nonetheless and a black one apparently.
It explained the itchy need to claw, and all the hissing, and why no one batted an eye. It explained the purr. This comforting, deep rumble that kept growing with James' hands in his fur. Killing Sirius could wait a little longer, he had all the time in the world to plan a revenge and include Evan and Barty in it. Perhaps Pandora; Sirius loved her, she would easily fool him. And being McKinnon's girlfriend, Dorcas knew the Gryffindor Tower like the back of her hand.
Perfect.
And perfect, indeed. For now, Regulus could bury himself deeper into James' jumper and enjoy breathing him in. Who knew when he'd be allowed to do that again?
“And Prongs has no idea, you said?” Remus asked, leaning against Sirius who sat on the arm of the sofa. Watching the agitation from the opposite corner of the common room, he laid a tender kiss on Sirius' shoulder and Sirius was tempted to just let himself fall backward onto him.
“Absolutely none. Which makes it funnier, isn't it? I thought Reg would be something… meaner. You even said he'd make a good possum.”
“Opossums aren't mean, love.”
“They look mean. Pete betted on a black sheep, at least he got half of it correct.”
Remus threw him a short amused look. “Shouldn't we break the news to James before he starts kissing the kitten though?”
“Nah, have you seen Reg?” Sirius let the intrusive thought win and toppled over. With a smile, he ended half-sprawled on the couch and the other half on Remus' thighs where he was welcomed with a soft gaze. “He's exactly where he wants to be. A bit like me right now.”
A blush crept up Remus' cheeks, but he nodded towards the others before Sirius got lost into it. “Are we sure about that? He looks pissed to me.”
Regulus was indeed looking close to murdering someone.
Could they blame him? Coming back with a kitten in his arms made James pretty popular in the Gryffindor Tower, more than he already was. Regulus was appalled.
Where did you get it? How old is it? What's its name?
Still, there were less people gathered around them now. Just the girls, with Marlene monopolising James' conversation about their upcoming Quidditch match and Mary brushing Lily's hair for the night. But a few occasional younger years giggled and climbed down their dorms now and then after they heard their friends talk about a kitten downstairs, asking James if they could pet it too with no regard for Regulus hissing at them.
Thankfully, James refused every demand. But Sirius wasn't fooled. Every time he did so, Regulus melted even more. And, from the moment his brother had been taken from his arms and Sirius heard him purr, everything during the summer had started to make a little too much sense to interrupt them.
Regulus and James lingering in the kitchen every morning after breakfast, though Regulus stayed quiet and James did most of the talking. Regulus silently following them wherever Sirius and James wanted to have fun for the day, no matter how much he scowled at their 'stupid' pranks. Regulus had liked to hang out in James' room in their company and James' presence had made him less sharp, also. Easier to connect with. Sirius in his own attempts to get closer to his brother had completely missed that maybe, Regulus had wanted to know James better than Sirius gave him credit for.
It didn't come as a surprise however; James, like the rest of the Potters, was so easy to love.
“Ah, well. It was indeed a matter of minutes before the inevitable, I suppose,” Remus laughed.
“Does he still look pissed to you now?”
Regulus had softened each time James showered him with attentions but it was nothing compared to how he closed his eyes and lifted his head to the other man while James kissed the top of his soft head.
What should Sirius say? That's my brother, James? Stay away? Guys, not in front of me? But for what, exactly?
Making himself more comfortable, Sirius found a good spot on his boyfriend's lap to rest his head and smiled for himself instead.
Regulus was his brother, but first and foremost, he was his baby. Having raised him, and kept him safe from their parents, and made sure he never cried over nothing, Sirius was weak when his brother was happy. He could have done far much worse than landing between James' loving hands for the night, pampered just as he needed.
“Alright, James. Stop moving,” Marlene said. At her tone, James stilled on his way to kiss the kitten again. “One sec, he can wait,” she grumbled, “I can't. You have something in your hair and it's been staring at me for ages.”
Unfortunately, her hand was caught before it reached its destination. Stopped in extremis by a young frowning Slytherin who barely got the time to realise he transformed back that he already batted Marlene's attempt away.
“I can do that,” Regulus cut off, ignoring the dead silence around.
Gently, he swept the leaf off James' hair himself, proving a Black couldn't in fact be dismissed to wait.
Then, keeping his chin high and proud, he carefully readjusted his balance on top of the Gryffindor, glaring behind him when both Mary and Lily burst out laughing not knowing they were making fun of James gaping at Regulus instead.
“Now that it's done,” he said at James, replacing one of his hands on his waist and the second to his head, closing his eyes like his feline counterpart. “Keep going.”
“You better be kidding me,” Marlene huffed after Regulus turned back into a curled kitten on James' lap.
“I didn't teach him that,” Sirius muttered, impressed, unsure if he was at his brother changing into his human form by himself or being that bold. “Moony, who's that and what did they do to our Reggie?”
Remus snorted. “You should probably teach him not to transform in public. Sure, it's just us right now, but still.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
“Nice one, Regulus,” Lily offered once she was done laughing. The glare didn't deter her. “I'm sure you gave that idiot a good fright.”
James sticked his tongue out but it was Marlene who replied, “He gave me a fright.”
“She didn't specify which idiot,” Mary laughed again, stretching her palm up towards Sirius and Remus' corner.
“What does that mean?” Sirius said as he watched Remus take his wand, then send a few galleons her way. “Remus!”
“It means don't bet a kitten isn't baby Black against me if you don't want to lose money.” Mary blew a kiss at Remus. “Thank you, darling.”
“Come on, the frown is the same. Don't take us for idiots,” Lily added.
“I could have waited until you told me before making a bet myself…” Remus confessed to Sirius quietly.
It wasn't a secret that Remus refused to participate in the original bet, sharing his guess but stating fate and magic had their own ways. That no one could play smarter and it would be counterproductive to start with. But apparently fate found him and thought funny to see him lose.
“Learned my lesson for sure.” His amber eyes remained gentle as Remus traced down the worry lines of Sirius' face with a finger. “Everything's going to be fine, Pads, you know that?”
Sirius blinked up.
Here he was again, worrying sick despite himself, not even knowing why. Acting as a protector at all time had its downfall, a sort of fighting response so ingrained in his body he wasn't always aware he was on edge until Remus' werewolf felt it.
“What's wrong?” Remus whispered just to be heard from him.
Making sure Regulus was too distracted first, Sirius said, “What if he doesn't want to spend any more time with me now that we're done with this? He's always so closed-off, what if he hates me?”
“He would have never followed you if he did, Pads.”
But running away from Grimmauld Place to the Potters never depended on mending a relationship their parents had tried to break. Sirius never expected Regulus to accept. His brother, proudly a Black in every aspect, and protected from the rotten side of their family, had surprised him. But even if Regulus had followed, it didn't mean he wasn't tired of Sirius having no idea who he was if he wasn't a human shield.
It never meant that Regulus loved him the way Sirius would sacrifice anything to keep him safe.
Most of the time they couldn't bear each other for an hour before they started bickering.
“It's been four months… You know what I'll tell you,” Remus scolded gently, laying his thumb on Sirius' lips to mimic a kiss. “Listen to what he has to say, love. There's no point dwelling on the past.”
“Guys!” Peter chose his moment to barge in the common room, thankfully stirring Sirius from somewhere darker in his own head. “You won't believe what happened… Am I interrupting something? You all look sus as fuck.”
Folding the Marauder map into his pocket, Peter made a beeline for Sirius and Remus. He leaned over the back of their couch to whisper, keeping an eye on the others.
“Tell me I'm not tripping! I saw Regulus' name on the map—On James. I swear I smoked only one joint this time!”
Sirius laughed despite himself. Merlin, he needed that.
“What's so funny?” Peter reached out to slap Sirius' knee and turned to Remus. “What did I miss?”
“Sirius is having his fourth existential crisis of the day. I managed to lose a bet. And I think Reg is this close to commit murder, the question is who is going to be the target, and no you're not tripping. How was your evening, Wormy?”
“Uneventful in comparison,” he grumbled. “Couldn't get past the first riddle of the Ravenclaw Tower… Next time I'm staying here. It seems like you guys got all the fun.”
“You know,” Remus trailed on, “If you need to steal and wear your crush's perfume for him to notice you, I don't think he's the right one. He sounds like an ass, to be honest.”
Sirius nodded. “If Moony says he's an ass, he's an ass.”
“Do you have any better idea? I'm not a cute kitten, I'm just an ugly rat.”
“Don't let anyone say you're ugly,” Sirius fired back.
“And Prongs didn't need Regulus to be a kitten to notice him,” Remus added and Regulus' ears shifted in his direction. “I'm sure there is someone out there who sees you for who you are, but they're not a Ravenclaw asshole. I'm sorry.”
“But he's handsome.”
“Not the only handsome one in the universe.”
“Wait, what did you say?” Sirius asked, watching Regulus lift two curious eyes on James.
“That Lockhart's handsome?” Peter repeated.
“Not that. Moony's right though, there is far better than this imbecile. Did you know he speak more to his reflection than anybody else in the school?” Sirius frowned, eyeing Remus next. “What did you say about Prongs and Reggie?”
Peter and Remus exchanged a long look before Peter risked, “You… didn't know?”
“No?”
For the second time today, Sirius started to reconsider what he thought he knew.
Because if Regulus and James had spent time together in the kitchen during the summer, Sirius realised it had been because Effie had always saved him a seat next to her son and Effie would never do something without a reason. And sure, Regulus had followed them around almost every day, but James had always included him first. Sirius watched his best friend keep his door open and allow Regulus on his bed when they were hanging out in his room, heard him encourage his brother to communicate his taste to Effie and Monty.
And If Sirius had found a common ground with his brother then, it had been because someone muttered in his ear that Regulus becoming an Animagus was challenging enough and could be an interesting development.
James had been in the picture all along. Offering a place to stay and more, and maybe once again Sirius had been too distracted to notice what had been blooming right under his nose.
“Alright,” Sirius jumped on his feet and clapped in his hands. “Everyone out. Bedtime, whatever. Not you.” Sirius pointed at James as soon as he moved.
“But—” Marlene opened her mouth to protest but Lily gave her a pointed look, already stretching a hand to help Mary up. “Okay, fine. Oh wow, I'm so, so tired now. Right girls?”
Sirius rolled his eyes. Knowing them, they would probably stay awake a long while in their dorms for Mary to finish the small decorative braids in Lily's hair, and enough for them to speculate. But they still gathered their belongings quickly, waving their goodnight to everyone. Perhaps a good luck to James and Regulus—though it was possible Sirius misheard.
As soon as their eyes met, Remus nodded knowingly. Without being told twice, he took his book left on the nearest side table and Peter by the shoulders, and dragged both toward the boys' staircases. There too, there was a fat chance Sirius would find them behind the door trying to listen.
When only the three of them remained, Sirius finally approached James and Regulus.
“It's not necessary to give me the talk, you know,” James anticipated with a wince.
“You two have a lot of talking to do apparently, but the talk isn't for you,” Sirius answered. Instead he caught Regulus by the scruff of his neck and ignored James' protestation as he lifted him from his lap. “I want you to know that you're safe and you're loved, and you have a family to come back to now. Everyone in this room and who left it has your back so be nice this time, Reggie, you hear me?”
Regulus didn't hiss when Sirius replaced him where he rightfully belonged.
“Like I told you…” James started but Sirius stopped him with a pat on his head.
“Good night, Prongs. Don't break each other's heart.”
Sirius had replaced Regulus perfectly well in James' jumper, intentionally or not. He was held tight and James was breathing into his fur, a steady warm blow slowly rocking him into a quiet purr. James seemed focused on the staircase leading to the dorms as if one his friends would ran back down, but Regulus could hear everyone had gone to bed by now.
To be an animal with a good hearing had its perks.
“I think we should talk,” James said eventually. “Merlin, it does sound bad said like that but Reg, I can't be speaking with a cat. What if it's a prank? Is it really you? Are you in here? I'm still not sure I didn't hallucinated you earlier.”
Fondly, Regulus bumped his head against James' chin.
Idiot.
“Can you turn back? I'm sorry about Sirius by the way, we both know how he is but I don't think it's that bad.”
Fifteen years sharing the life of his brother, Sirius could throw a fit, Regulus wasn't scared of him. It wasn't the reason why Regulus remained in his kitten form.
“I'm pretty sure it was him giving his blessings if it makes you feel better,” James carried on and Regulus' ears perked up at that.
A blessing? In what world?
Don't do this. Don't do that. And be careful. Be kinder, Reggie, step out of your comfort zone for once. There wasn't a day in his life when Sirius didn't breathe down his neck and get a say about what Regulus was doing. He could understand Sirius was protective in his own way but having an older brother felt like having a constant shadow judging each of his step.
“Well, hm… If blessings we need?” James said then, rubbing the back of his own neck awkwardly as he leaned back against the couch. His undivided attention was still on Regulus however, and oh.
Oh, Regulus had always loved James' eyes.
There had been a time when Regulus had wondered how a guy so simple (untrue), with boring hair and a boring face (so, so untrue), and an even more charming boring smile, could have captivated his brother enough to steal him. But the boring argument never applied to his eyes, Regulus would have never lied about them. His friends took years to understand Regulus processed his emotions better in the quiet, sometimes to the detriment of himself, but James took only a glance and that was it.
They were kind, his eyes.
They had been the kindest that night, when he opened the door of his house to the two brothers and settled them on the couch. Regulus had known them fierce, and worried, sometimes sad but most of all full of mischief. They had made him feel welcomed and important for the first time in Regulus' short life.
No wonder Sirius got lured first. It had been easy to make Regulus spill his secrets too when left both alone.
“Not that I want to assume anything right now, which is why I think we should talk… But I feel like—I mean—You and I… Oh, James, shut up once in your life,” James groaned at himself, throwing an arm over his face.
Heart pacing too fast for his small kitten's chest, Regulus bumped his head against James' elbow this time, pushing it out of the way.
No, no, no. Don't shut up.
James laughed nervously. “I'm going to take a wild guess now and hope for the best. One slow blink means 'yes', two quick 'no'.” He met Regulus' eyes. “Are you struggling to shift?”
Yes!
Finally. Regulus immediately blinked once, at which James sighed in relief.
“Do you want me gone?”
Two blinks, this time.
“Sorry, I still have to ask… Do you want me to get Sirius just in case?”
If you bring him back here, I'm killing you both.
Regulus was ready to blink no again and over again if needed, there were definitely activites that didn't need to involve his brother at all time and cuddling with James was one.
Apparently sharing the same opinion, James leaned in. “Thank Merlin, Reg.” He pressed a kiss between his ears. “Alright, so the first times as an Animagus are always complicated. We panicked too, did you know? Trust me, you're doing more than well. What you need is to picture yourself doing something only you as a human would do. ”
Regulus was trying though. He had been since they all left, it just didn't work.
No matter his attempts, something in his magic rebelled and there was this invisible wall. Regulus no longer needed to pretend to be a kitten, it felt like he became one. Was one. The same way Padfoot and Sirius were interchangeably the two sides of the same coin, and that if Regulus tolerated a dog in his bed sometimes, it was because he loved his brother enough for it.
“Try to picture your hands, and your feet. Remember how it feels to coordinate your body,” James encouraged. “I'm a stag by the way if you didn't know. The only way I've found to help me back then was to picture myself climbing a tree. Can't climb a tree when you're a stag now, can you?”
Regulus blinked once.
He knew James was right. It had been an impulse earlier—How had McKinnon dared stop James on his way to kiss him, leaving Regulus hanging, feeling humiliated?—but he couldn't have got rid of the leaf in James' hair himself if he had stayed a kitten. Being an animal made him feel like one… reckless, and possessive. A hundred times more on the defensive.
Greed was a powerful catalyst too, as Regulus was learning now. From desiring James' hands running into his fur to wanting them running over his skin, there was only a short step.
“There's a spell I can cast if you need.”
Regulus' groan came out as a harmless hiss. The only thing he needed was… oh, damn.
He wanted James' lips on his human skin, devouring his human neck, and to know what it would feel like, and be human to shut down the hunger by kissing the Gryffindor himself.
“One blink means y—Fuck.”
A solid grip instinctively steadied him, pressing him deeper onto James.
Regulus' breath itched. The transition was brutal. His head spun, dizzy from every way his body was connected to James. His human body, whose hands was holding James' shoulders hard, whose thighs straddled him like his life depended on it. Maybe Regulus should have thought about it before he made the wish to be touched, because it was suddenly all too intense.
Meeting brown, warm eyes, Regulus still felt his lips stretch into a grin. “Good evening.”
“So you want to talk to me after all,” James immediately smiled back.
“Don't be smug about it, Potter.”
“And here I thought we were finally on a first name basis. It was fast though, what helped in the end?”
“Not climbing a tree in my case,” Regulus admitted, eyes flicking down to James' lips, subtlety long gone with the others to bed.
“Are we talking about another sort of climbing?”
Regulus really loved—loved—James' eyes right now. Burying his forehead into James' shoulder before he would do or say something too reprehensible, he muffled his groan. “It's a humbling experience to be a kitten. I thought I'd be something more… impressive.”
“We've been there first,” James said, cradling the back of Regulus' head with a hand.
“You're a stag.”
“Still didn't choose it more than you chose to be a cat.”
James' fingers ran higher on his scalp, threading slowly between his curls.
“Kitten,” Regulus mumbled. It felt too good. Salazar, James' touch rocked him into a peaceful sort of daze.
That, should have come with a warning in his opinion. Don't let James touch you, Reggie, you're so touch-starved it's a trap.
“Are we sure Sirius had been a good teacher about this whole thing? He was no bigger than a harmless puppy the first time, I'd let you know. We were all small in fact, but I can assure you our animals grew up with us since then. Yours will too.” Slipping another hand on his waist, James coaxed Regulus closer. “Which means… I won the bet.”
“You thought I'd be a cat?” Regulus pulled away enough to meet his eyes. “And it didn't occur to you it was me?”
“Don't get me wrong, I had my doubts.”
“Didn't look like it,” Regulus huffed.
“Sunshine…”
Wait a minute.
“…Have you seen a kitten so poorly approachable before?”
James had used that stupid nickname all summer. Less now that they were at school which was why it didn't hit, but James had used it tonight.
A thumb brushed slow circles just above his hip but Regulus couldn't think about anything, save for James knowingly cuddling him all evening. “A black kitten who only let Sirius and I get closer?” James said, unfazed—and why would it be any different, he wasn't the one struck by lightning. “Who wanted to murder anyone trying to get my attention? Not that I'm assuming you want to keep me to yourself, exactly like I'm not assuming we need any blessings whatsoever, but…”
Catching the smile at the corner of Regulus' lips, James concluded with, “Yeah?”
This silly Gryffindor had no idea, really, how irresistible he was when he was rambling.
“What if I want to keep James Potter to myself?”
“Oh, I'm sure he'd like that,” James immediately replied. “Like, a lot. I swear the guy had far too many thoughts about it since the summer, it's annoying. James, man, get a grip. We get it.”
“James?”
“Hm?”
Regulus cupped the Gryffindor's face between his hands and kissed him.
It was soft and warm. Like James' eyes and touch, a caress against his mouth. Regulus moved forward without thinking, instinctively parting his lips, and only then did he remember he had never kissed anyone before. An evening spent receiving affection, and it made him completely forget himself.
“This okay?” Regulus whispered, unsure how to answer the sigh spilled into his mouth, and equally uncertain of what it meant apart that James just set his insides on fire. Everywhere he was touched was suddenly burning.
Should he answer with more hands in James' hair or more tongue?
And if James expected something else?
The grip on his waist tightened and pulled him closer. A low hum of approval left James when Regulus slipped his fingers deeper into his wild curls. “You feel good,” James muttered against his mouth.
Lips and legs, and heart, especially his heart, Regulus opened.
If he was falling, James was there to catch and guide him. He swallowed the hesitation and the hunger radiating from Regulus, fed on it until the kiss deepened slowly. Teasing against his lips, James hummed and Regulus let him in, releasing a sound of his own that urged the other boy to lick inside his mouth in earnest, messy and yet each second of exploration was more tender than the last.
His mind beautifully quietened and Regulus knew then, that he was indeed safe.
And loved.
That he would come back to the Potters for the next holidays, with his annoying but indefectible brother and his own room down the corridor from his crush, now turned something unknown.
Salazar forbids, he did want to be nice.
Was kissing always like this? Feeling out of his skin like a butterfly?
Regulus cupped James' face as tightly as he was held and chased the sounds the boy was making like a tether, memorising the shape of his lips, learning every way James liked to be tasted until all they needed was a breath. James settled them more comfortably on the couch once Regulus gently nosed into his neck, dosing off a little bit, dizzy and content.
For his kitten and human form, James smelled good.
A hand played with a curl on his forehead, so tenderly. “Will Regulus Black go out with me if I ask?”
“He'd like that too,” Regulus nodded.
Had he known kissing James Potter would have this peaceful outcome, mind blank, legs intertwined together with a warm body beneath him, maybe Regulus would have listened to his friends and tried his luck much sooner.
The clock in the corner of the room punched him awake before he got to succumb to sleep. He didn't know how long he had been drifting, only that James' hand never left his hair. Making out had been a matter of seconds compared to the rest of his evening and with a grunt, he pushed himself up on his elbows. “But it might be time for Regulus to get back to his dorms if he wants to hear his alarm in the morning.”
“Stay,” James hummed back.
“He also has a revenge to plot and these things take some good rest.”
James' eyes fluttered open. “Revenge? What revenge?”
Rather a payback for the way Sirius threw him into James' arms. Nothing cruel, Regulus was grateful. Embarrassingly so, but very grateful. Still, because he knew Sirius would soon be insufferable about it, Regulus had some planning to do.
“If you want your date,” Regulus muttered and at those words, James' face lit up. “You never heard that part.”
“Are you saying that Regulus would date me?”
“I finish at six tomorrow, with Herbology,” Regulus leaned in, brushing the words against the Gryffindor's lips, knowing full well he would curl back into a kitten in a minute.
And maybe, just maybe, they would be nuzzled awake at sunrise before the common room got busy, by a black dog who slipped out of his dorms after an all-nighter, making sure his little brother wouldn't be late anywhere for the first time in his life, especially not for Potions. But that, Regulus wouldn't know it yet.
“Don't stand me up, Potter.”
