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“Doctor. Stop.”
He pulled his finger out of his mouth and blinked at her innocently. “Stop what?”
“Stop licking the bowl.”
“I’m not licking the bowl. Honestly Rose, what kind of barbarian do you take me for? I’m using my finger.”
Rose huffed a sardonic laugh and went back to sifting flour. “You’re gross.”
“I am not!” he protested.
“You’re sticking your finger in raw cookie dough. That’s disgusting.”
“Why is that disgusting?”
“Because, Doctor, there are raw eggs in that. It could make you sick.”
He sniffed. “That doesn’t make me disgusting, that makes me adventurous. Besides, I'm helping.”
"How on earth are you helping?"
"I'm taste-testing." He defiantly swiped his finger along the side of the bowl of completed cookie dough and stuck it in his mouth.
Rose laughed again, a proper laugh this time. “How did I ever end up engaged to someone so daft?”
“Pure luck, I suppose.”
She snorted. “Luck. That’s it. Yeah.”
“Why Rose Tyler," he said, sounding scandalized. "Are you implying that you’re not the luckiest woman alive?”
Her shoulders came up around her ears and she took on an innocent expression. “I never said anything.”
“You are!” he accused her with a wet finger. “You’re implying that I’m not a catch!”
“You’re a catch?” Her head tilted to the side, but she was grinning.
“Of course I am, Rose Tyler! I’m quite the catch, I’ll have you know. Why, in some sectors, I’m hailed as the most eligible bachelor in the star system!”
Rose rolled her eyes. “Sure you are.”
“Well, I was.”
“And you’re not eligible anymore.”
He nodded. “That’s right. Lucky you.”
She rolled her eyes. “Yes, yes. Lucky me. Now, will you please bring the bowl over here so that I can finish these cookies for Mum?”
The Doctor regarded her closely for a second. “I don’t think you’re taking me seriously, Rose. And I’m being perfectly serious about your great fortune.”
She was getting annoyed. She honestly didn’t have time for this. Only one batch of dough was done and she was supposed to bring two types to the cookie party. “I am serious, Doctor, and you’re exactly right. I’m the luckiest woman who ever lived. Now hand me that bowl of batter.”
He grabbed up the bowl and took two steps towards her, setting it down in front of her. She picked up the spoon to start stirring, and before she noticed, he’d picked up the half-full sifter and dumped the contents over her head.
Rose squawked, her hands coming up by her face as if to catch the offending flour, and she blinked her eyes in disbelief. She heard a clink and turned to see the Doctor setting down the sifter, a smug smile in place.
“See? That’s what you get for not taking me seriously, Rose.”
Her eyes narrowed at him. “I’m going to kill you.”
“Ah ah ah…” he wagged a finger. “Can’t do that. I don’t regenerate anymore, you know.”
“Fine. I am going to maim you.” She advanced towards him slowly and deliberately, and he began his retreat.
“Now really, Rose,” he started, taking a couple of steps backwards, checking over his shoulder every couple of steps. “Is that really necessary?”
She picked up a pair of eggs. “Oh, yes. I think so.”
His eyes narrowed on the two eggs in her hand, and he took another step backwards. “What are you going to do with those?”
“I’m going to ruin your perfectly coiffed hairdo.”
Hands came up in a gesture of surrender in front of him. “Let’s not get hasty.”
His body jolted to a halt - he’d hit the wall. Taking advantage of his shocked look, Rose leapt forward and smashed the two eggs on his head. Yellow yolk and clear albumen dripped down his face, and his mouth opened wide in shock and protest. Rose took a step back, crossing her arms, pleased with herself and his outrage.
“You’ll pay for that, Rose Tyler.”
She cocked an eyebrow. “Oh, I will, will I?”
He wiped the egg out of his face as best he could and started prowling towards her - Rose was reminded of the first him she met.
“Oh, yes. You see, you may not know this, but I’ve been in many, many food fights. And I can tell you without question that I have always come out on top.”
“I thought you liked it when I came out on top.”
“Very cute,” he said, still advancing. “But cheeky, sexy references aren't going to get you out of this one. You won’t win, no matter how much you try to distract me. You see…”
Quick as lightning, he dashed around her and picked up a stick of butter, smashing it on the top of her head. Rose gasped and he stepped back, slipping his filthy hands into his pockets.
“Warned you,” he sing-songed.
Rose grabbed the milk that sat in the measuring cup, ready to pour, and tossed it on him.
“Rose!” he yelled.
“Ha, ha. Eggs and milk...you’re no better than a piece of french toast.”
“Oh, I’ll show you…”
Cookie ingredients were thrown around the room and the Doctor cheated (according to Rose) when he grabbed a cookie sheet to use as a shield in their little war. After a few minutes, when both she and the Doctor were completely coated in the contents of the kitchen, one or the other called a truce. They stood there in the ruined kitchen, dripping with big globs of deconstructed cookie dough falling off both of them, and together they burst into laughter. The Doctor picked Rose up by the waist and spun her around, sending flour and sugar flying off of her and onto the refrigerator, but neither cared. He sat her down after a moment and bent his head low to kiss her. Her arms went around his neck and she melted into the kiss.
“I love you,” he told her when he pulled away.
“I love you, too. Doctor?”
“Yes, Rose?”
She gave him a tongue-touched grin. “I really am the luckiest woman alive.”
“Quite right, too.”