Archive of Our Own

Cas added detergent pods to the dishwasher before closing and locking the door. Dean came up behind him and kissed the nape of his neck.

Cas looked over his shoulder and met Dean's lips in a soft kiss.

"I'm gonna grab a beer. You want anything?"

"Can you bring me an iced tea?"

Dean stepped back and swatted Cas on his ass. Cas turned and retaliated by flicking him with the dish towel. Laughing, Dean got their drinks while Cas walked out of the kitchen and to the front door.

Stepping outside to the wrap around porch, Cas went and made himself comfortable on the porch swing, legs folded to the side.

Dean joined him a moment later.

The sky had turned that soft sherbet orangey pink. The day had been warm. It was mid August. School would be starting soon and families were out, taking advantage of the time they had left.

The neighbor across the street, Doug, was out with his four children. He was running alongside the youngest, Anna. She was learning to ride her bike without the safety wheels. He was red faced and sweaty.

Dean stood and walked inside the house and returned a moment later, with a bright, colorful box in his hands.

"Hey, Doug! You look a little warm, buddy. You and the rugrats want a popsicle?" Dean called across the asphalt.

Doug looked up at Dean with a grateful smile. He slowed Anna to a stop and set her bike on the curb. Doug motioned for his kids to come back.

"This is a nice surprise, Dean," Doug said as he reached the end of the drive.

Little Anna skipped up and looked into the box Dean held out. She pulled her frozen treat from the box and with a 'Thank you, Mr. Dean,' she opened the wrapper.

The rest of the children and Doug took their treats and headed back across the street with a friendly wave.

Dean went and sank slowly down on the swing by Cas.

Cas unfolded his legs and slid across the swing and slid his arm around Dean's waist, pulling him close, brushing a soft kiss on his cheek.

He rested his forehead against Dean's temple.

"Someday," he whispered.

"Yeah," Dean gruffly replied before he cleared his throat and wiped his sticky fingers on his pants.

The phone started to ring inside the house. Dean patted Cas on the knee and moved to go answer.  

Cas leaned back and started to rock the swing back and forth, slowly with one foot.

Dean's voice was slightly muffled by the distance and the screen door but Cas could still make out the conversation. 

"Winchester."

"Yes."

"What? Are you sure?"

Cas frowned and looked towards the door.

Dean pushed through the door hard enough that it bounced against the side of the house, he looked at Cas, eyes wild.

Cas stood and quickly went to Dean's side and gripped his forearm, praying Sam and his family were okay.

"Miss Johnson, let me put you on speaker." Dean's fingers shook as he pressed the microphone icon.

"Ms. Johnson, can you repeat what you just told me?"

"Of course, Mr.Winchester. we had a young woman show interest in you and your husband's profile. She had some follow up questions. I'll be sending them to the email we have on file."

Cas was wide eyed staring at the phone. He forgot how to breathe.  

"Cas and I will fill it out as soon as possible." Dean closed his eyes. Cas looked up and watched his husband's throat work to swallow.

Cas cleared his throat.

"Ms. Johnson. Thank you. Please send the questionnaire over. As Dean said, we will fill it out immediately. Thank you. Have a nice evening."

Dean's thumb closed the call.

Green eyes that held all the sunrises Cas ever needed to see, opened. They were suspiciously shiny. 

Dean pulled Cas to him in a back crushing hug. His face nestled in Cas’s neck.

Cas cradled Dean to him.  

Ecstasy. Euphoria. Jubilation.

There weren't enough words for the feeling coursing through him—until the cold prickle of fear slid in right behind it. Trepidation. They had been looked at before…

The feeling was there lying in wait. Hiding. They have been looked at before. But in the end, another couple chosen. Heartbreak and despair consumed them for months after. 

Cas shook it off. Dean was positively radiating joy. He wouldn't take that from him.  

He would be there to pick up the pieces if necessary. Just like always.

"Cas?" Dean had a small frown on his face. He must have said his name a few times. 

Cas smiled at Dean and pulled in for a hard lingering kiss.

Lips separated, Cas took Dean's hand and led him into the house, down the hall, past the perpetually closed bedroom door and into the office.

Cas booted up his computer and logged in to the email.

The adoption agency email was waiting. 

Cas let out his breath slowly, forcing his shoulders to relax.

He opened the email. There were only three additional questions.  

Dean was sitting at his side, reading over his shoulder.

"Okay, question one. 'What happens in your house when someone is having a terrible day?'," Cas read out loud.

He turned and faced Dean.

"Well?"

"I'm no good with words, sweetheart," Dean said while shrugging.

Cas tilted his head, staring over Dean's shoulder. 

"True. Actions speak louder than words." He said turning back to the computer.

"When I'm having a bad day, you don't make me talk. You bring me tea. And let me sit in silence while I work through my feelings."

"And when you are having a bad day, I let you go into the garage and take Baby apart and put her back together again. And when you're ready to talk, you do."

Cas's lips curled, "We learned the hard way to give each other the space we needed. I don't see us doing anything differently with a child. We'll take cues from them. If they want to talk and vent, we let them. Children have the right to express their emotions in a healthy way."

Dean nodded slowly, his brows coming together. 

"But what if they start throwing stuff around?"

Cas removed his fingers from the keyboard.

"Well, expressing yourself is not the same as being destructive. If they need a physical outlet first, we help them find what works and then we talk."

"Is that an acceptable answer?"

Dean nodded. 

"Yeah, cause we don't want them thinking the kid ain't ever gonna have discipline. That wouldn't work."

Cas nodded in agreement.

"Okay, question number two. 'What is a small silly tradition you can't wait to share with your child?',"

Cas started typing.

"Hey, we didn't talk about our answer."

Cas paused, hands hovering over the keys.

Looking at Dean, he leaned over and bussed Dean quickly before he resumed typing.

"I don't need to ask because I know. I know because it's the same thing you couldn't wait to share with me. Picking out a Christmas tree. Learning to make an apple pie. Movie nights. Game nights."

"You're a big softie Dean Winchester."

Dean scoffed.

"Am not," he mumbled. 

"Dean."

Dean clamped his lips together at Cas's tone.

"Okay, okay. What's the last question?"

"This one is interesting. 'If the child turns out to be completely different from both of you—different interests, different personality—how will you support that?'," Cas finished reading. 

"Huh?" Dean asked.

Cas lifted a shoulder. "I enjoy reading, going to museums and beekeeping. You my love, play video games, work on your car and spend your free time larping. What if they don't enjoy those activities? What if they want to, I don't know, dig for dinosaurs or learn ballet?"

Dean pursed his lips.

"Then I guess we're gonna buy some shovels and tutus."

Cas huffed a laugh. 

"That's why I love you Dean Winchester."

Now it was Dean's turn to lean and kiss Cas on his cheek.

 After rereading their answers, they sent the email back to Ms Johnson.  

Now they waited. 

Cas lay on his side staring at the moon.

It was late. Or early depending on how you viewed it.

What if…

He rolled over and stared at Dean's profile bathed in moonlight. 

He wished he could snap his fingers and give this man a child. If anyone was born to be a father, it was Dean Winchester. Kind and loving. Most caring man he ever met. 

He saw the look in his eyes when he watched Sam and Jess's girls playing. The longing. The want.  

He knew if Dean hadn't met Cas, he would have married a woman and had a house full of children.

The guilt weighed on him.  

When he met Dean at that college party fifteen years ago, he had a girlfriend. Her name was Lisa and she was crazy about Dean. They would have had beautiful children. 

The lump in his throat almost choked him.

He rolled out of bed and padded to the kitchen on silent feet. He grabbed a water bottle and tipped his head back taking a long swallow.

Strong arms wrapped around him from behind. Dean kissed his neck and nuzzled gently. 

"What's wrong, sunshine? And don't say nothin'. I know you."

Cas sighed softly and set the water down.

He turned in his husband's arms and slid his hands up and behind Dean's neck, holding him close.

"I was thinking about college. Lisa Braeden."

Dean tipped his head back to look at Cas. His eyes took in the downturned mouth, the dull blue of his eyes.

"Why would you be thinking about her?"

Cas looked away and shrugged.

"Don't do that, Cas. Look at me."

Cas lifted his eyes and looked at Dean.

"Because if you hadn't met me you'd have married her. And you would have children," he said, voice thick from holding his emotions in.

Dean's face softened.

"Maybe. Maybe I would have married her. And been happy. But you know what?"

Cas shook his head, unable to talk.

"Happy is a pale comparison to what I feel with you, Castiel. When we met, it was like pieces of a puzzle clicking together." Dean kissed Cas's forehead.

"I'll steal your own words and say them back. We share a profound bond and I wouldn't change a damn thing, even if we never get to have kids. Don't say that again. You hear me?"

Cas nodded and buried his face in Dean's chest.

"I love you, Dean Winchester."

Dean squeezed him tight.

"I love you, Castiel Winchester."

Cas nodded and sniffed once before threading his hand with Dean's and leading him back to bed.

Slide after slide. Cas met the eyes of Layla, the grade level lead, and rolled his eyes. She kicked him lightly under the desk.

The same song and dance every year. New curriculum. New software. New technology. 

The only thing that remained the same were the mandatory training meetings. He could recite the bloodborne pathogen video by heart.

His phone began vibrating on the table. He snatched it up while giving the other teachers a small grimace.

Caller ID lit up with Modern Family Alliance. 

Cas stood quickly, jostling the paper cups of coffee and waving at Principal Hanscom.  

He stepped into the hallway and answered the phone, slightly breathless.

"Hello?"

"Good morning. This is Hannah from Modern Family Alliance. I'm looking for Castiel Winchester."

Cas cleared his throat.

"I'm me," he laughed lightly, "I mean, I'm Castiel."

"Castiel, this is Hannah Johnson, from Modern Family Alliance. I had tried calling, Dean but couldn't get through. We have wonderful news. The expectant mother has reviewed your profile and the additional questions and she has chosen you and Dean. You have been matched."

Cas shut his eyes tight and gripped the phone.

"Are you sure?" he whispered.

Hannah's voice softened.

"Yes, Castiel. You have chosen." She cleared her throat. Back to business.

"She's about seven months along, so we need to set up an appointment for you both to come in, go over the paperwork, and talk about next steps."

"Of course. When are you available? We'll be there."

Cas could hear clicking on Hannah's end.

"How does Tuesday, next week sound? Nine am?"

"It's perfect. We will be there. Thank you."

"Of course. We look forward to meeting with you two on Tuesday."

The line went quiet.

Cas dropped his arm down at his side.

He looked around the hall, and with a shaking hand opened the cafeteria door. It shut behind him with a loud clang.

All eyes in the room followed him as he walked over to the principal.

"I… I have to go."

She puts the microphone down and placed a hand on his shoulder. A concerned frown on her face.

"Cas, you don't look so good. Are you okay?" 

Cas started laughing.

Deep, booming laugh filled the room.

"Dean and I were chosen. We're finally going to be parents."

Gasps were heard around the room followed by clapping and ear piercing whistles.

A smile spread across her kind face.

"Well, shoot. You better get out of here and go tell that handsome husband of yours the good news." She said while making shooing motions at him.

Cas nodded. He went back to his table to grab his belongings, but Layla met him halfway. She had packed his bag for him.

She put her slender arms around his shoulders and gave him a quick hug.

"Congratulations, Cas. I'll share my notes with you later. Don't worry about anything."

He shared a grateful smile and walked quickly to his car.  

He needed to get to Dean.

Dean was bent over the engine of a Toyota Corolla, listening to the high pitched whine when the slam of a car door had him looking over his shoulder.

Cas was practically running across the concrete floor.

"Dean!" Cas shouted as he threw himself into Dean's arms. Dean wrapped his arms around Cas instinctively. 

"Hey, Sunshine, where's the fire?"

Cas pulled back, keeping a tight grip on his husband's shoulders.

"She picked us. We're going to be parents."

Dean's eyes widened.

He pulled Cas tight and spun him in a circle, Cas laughing with unfettered joy.

Dean set Cas down, breathless, and their eyes met and held. Dean surged forward and captured Cas's lips in a kiss that tasted of relief and happiness.  

Dean pulled back and stared into bright blue eyes.

"We did it, Cas."

Cas left Dean at the garage and went to pick up some pizza for dinner. They had so much to plan. 

He parked his car in the drive and grabbed the pizza as he climbed out.

Letting himself in the house, he toed off his shoes and hung up his bag.

He dropped the pizza on the counter and pulled out some paper plates.

He had just placed the pizza and beer on the table when the garage door opened and the soothing rumble of Baby's engine was heard.

The entry from the garage opened and Dean came in, tossing his keys on the counter.

"Okay. What do we now?" Dean said as he lowered himself to the kitchen chair and picked up his beer.

"We have an appointment on Tuesday at nine am to sign paperwork and discuss the next steps."

Cas took a deep breath and then exhaled.

He reached across the table and lightly held Dean's wrist.

"It's a girl, Dean. We're having a girl."

"Really?"

Cas nodded.

"I asked Ms. Johnson. We have so much to do. She's due in September."

Dean flipped open the box of pizza and picked up a slice. He took a shockingly large bite.

Talking around the food in his mouth, Dean pointed his pizza at Cas. 

"Eat up, sunshine. We've got a job to do."

Cas wrinkled his nose and handed Dean a napkin as he nodded.

Pizza eaten and leftovers bagged and placed in the refrigerator for Dean's lunch tomorrow, Cas followed him down the hall.

Dean was standing in front of the closed door. His hand hovered for a moment before he gripped it tight and turned, pushing it open.

The room was empty. No furniture. No boxes.  

Dean and Cas had purchased this house two years after their wedding. They had plans.

Dreams.  

It's taken them ten years but finally this room was going to be filled.

Dean flipped on the light switch and turned in a slow circle. He went and sat down, leaning his back against the wall. He took out his phone and glanced up at Cas.

"Come and sit. We need to make some lists."

Cas went and lowered himself to the carpet, stretching his legs out and crossing them at the ankles.

"Okay, so we need the basics: car seat, crib, bedding. The big stuff."

"Yes, I've been doing some research and I would like to buy the Nuna Pipa. It's costly, but it has high ratings."

Dean was typing on his phone

"Holy shit, Cas. That's like six-hundred dollars!"

"I know. But we can afford it. All we've done is work and save." He laid his hand on Dean's thigh and gave it a squeeze.

"This is what we've been saving for."

Dean nodded and exhaled.

"You're right. Yeah. Okay. On to the important purchases." 

Dean stood, right knee popping as he got to his feet.

"What color are we painting this room?"

Cas looked up at Dean and smiled.

"I've been thinking. This is our dream coming true. I have this vision of a fairytale." Cas closed his eyes. "Pale lavender walls, white trim. The ceiling is the color of the sky at twilight, when the redish orange mixes with the blue sky turning to a lavender cloud. And faily lights. All over…" His voice faded and he opened his eyes. The blue was soft. Serene.

Cas pointed to the wall by the door.

"I picture a light oak crib on that wall. Matching dresser over there." He said while pointing at the wall by the light switch.

Dean bent down and Cas tipped his face up. Their lips met in a feather light kiss.

"Okay, sweetheart. Let's go to bed. We have a lot of work to do tomorrow."

"Sam and Benny are gonna meet us at the house after lunch. They'll help bust out the paint and puttin' the furniture together."

"Okay. Is Jess bringing the girls over?"

Dean shook his head. "Nah. She's takin' em to the park. But, they are comin' over on Sunday for a barbecue. I invited the family."

Cas laughed.  

"So, I think what I'm hearing is that I need to go grocery shopping while you guys paint."

"... so, you and Cas pick out a name?" Sam asked as he taped the window.

Dean, paused as he was rolling paint on the wall.

"Shit. We haven't even thought about it."

"Makes sense, cher. Got more pressin' concerns," Benny piped up from across the room.

"You got that right, brother. I can't believe how much money we spent yesterday," Dean said with a sigh.

Sam snickered. 

"You love it and you know it."

Dean glanced at Sam. 

"I do. I'm, I've got this, like, bubbling inside. I just… " Dean shook his head.

"I feel like laughing. All the time. And Cas." Dean shook his head, a small smile curling his lips.

"What about that handsome man of yours?" Benny asked quietly. 

Dean turned and looked between Sam and Benny.

"Last night, he washed all the new clothes. And then he packed and repacked the bag for the hospital. He kept picking up the socks and just, holdin' em."

Dean wiped his forehead and began painting again.

"I'm really happy for you two. You guys are gonna be great," Sam said quietly.

Benny hummed from across the room.

"Thanks, man."

First coat of paint on and drying, Dean pulled out the crib.

Sam began laying the pieces out. Benny and Dean started screwing slats together. 

Thirty minutes later, the front door closed and Cas opened the refrigerator to put the food away.

"Ouch! God damn it, Sam!"

"Dean, I told you, this end goes into that end!"

Cas closed the door and with a small frown crept down the hall.

Pausing in the doorway, he watched the three large men trying, and failing, to put the crib together.

"What seems to be the problem?"

Dean's head whipped around and the slat he was holding slipped.

"Mother fuck-"

"Dean. We need to start watching our language," Cas said straightening from the door jam.

"Whats wrong?  Maybe I can help." He stepped closer to the wooden pieces.

"Somethins' wrong with the predrilled holes. They don't seem to line up."

Sam sighed

"They line up, Dean. I told you, you just need to squeeze the pieces together. It'll fit."

Cas tilted his head.

"Benny? You have anything else to add?" Cas asked.

Benny chuckled.

"Not a single thing, cher."

Cas nodded.

He stepped forward into the space.

He reached in and unclicked a latch.

Picked up the back panel and turned it right side up, perfectly lining up the predrilled holes.

He then slid panel B into panel C and pushed until he head a sharp click.

Silence fell over the room.

Sam and Dean shared a look.

A low rumbling laugh rolled out of Benny.

Cas leaned down and placed a quick kiss on Dean's forehead.

Before he stepped through the door, he turned and said, "Dean?"

"Uh, yeah sweetheart?"

"Make sure you guys rinse the brushes in the garage please. I don't want paint dripping on the carpet."

"You got it, Cas."

Cas smiled and went back to the kitchen

"I loosened it up for him," Dean said.

Sam rolled his eyes.

Cas and Dean were laying in bed, hands laced together. Legs twined. Speaking in hushed whispers as they talked about the baby. The future.

What she might look like. Sound like. Smell like.  

Doctor? Teacher? Artist? It didn't matter, as long as she was happy.

Dean and Cas talked about how tiny Sam and Jess's girls were when they came home.

"Sam asked about names. Have you thought about it?"

Cas nodded.

"Of course. Lots of names. Elizabeth. Victoria. Rachael. What about you?"

Dean smiled.

"Yeah. Sarah. Abigail. Emma."

"Those are nice names. But, I don't know. None feel right, you know?"

"I do."

Cas's eyes were shining in the dark.

"I think we should wait. When we hold her, we'll know her name."

Dean gazed softly at Cas. His husband. His love.

Dean pressed a soft kiss to Castiel’s lips—once, then another. His green eyes searched blue before the other man smiled, running a hand through the short hair at Dean's nape.

Leaning back in, Dean parted his lips slightly, meeting the other man’s in a tender press that spoke of years of shared history. His hand moved up to cup a stubbled jaw. Cas’s eyes fluttered closed, surrendering to the comfort of the touch as they pulled closer, their bodies flush together. Through the thin fabric of their shirts, Dean’s heartbeat felt strong and sure.

They moved in a slow and familiar rhythm, a quiet understanding guiding them. Fingers slid down to grip a hip firmly, a silent anchor in the moment, until Dean's breath hitched.

Shifting closer, Dean rested his forehead against Cas's neck, breathing in the scent of home. A soft sigh escaped Cas as he relaxed into the pillows, a deep sense of peace settling between them.

There was no urgency. No rush. Every touch an effortless intimacy of love and trust that ran deep, centered on the life they had built together.

After, they lay tangled in the quiet room. Cas rested his head against Dean's chest, listening to their breathing gradually slow. This is where they were supposed to be. 

Cas placed a lingering kiss over Dean's heart, and Dean rested his chin on the top of Cas's head, kissing his dark hair. Wrapped tightly around each other, they finally drifted to sleep.

Ready for what came next.

"Cas, can you bring me the tongs? I forgot 'em."

Cas popped his head out of the sliding door and gave Dean a quick nod.

Cas loaded his tray with tablecloths, plastic forks, and knives and set the tongs down on top.

He stepped outside and slid the screen door closed and set this tray down on the plastic table.  

Dean grabbed the tongs and went back to the grill.

"Let me know when you're ready for the hotdogs. I wasn't sure if Benny and Sam's kids would like steak. They just picked at it last time."

"Good call. Hey, did you get dessert?"

"Dean."

"Alright, alright. Don't get your panties in a bunch."

"Why not? You like it when that happens.'

The tips of Dean's ears turned red. And he looked around the empty yard.

"Cas! What if someone heard you?"

A deep laugh came from Cas.

"There's no one here, Dean."

Cas moved behind his husband, wrapped his arms around his waist, and placed a small kiss on the side of his neck.

"I wonder how she's feeling."

Dean cocked his head to the side.

"Who?"

Cas pulled away and started laying out the tablecloth. 

"The young woman that is making our dreams come true. She's seven months along. I've read a lot of changes occur. Swelling. Weight gain. Back pain."

He smoothed the plastic cloth in place.

"I hope she's not alone," he said softly. 

The door to the side gate swung open and four children came barreling though, heading for the backyard play area.

"Glad you're the first to arrive, Ben. You can help man the grill. Sam would burn everything."

"You got it brother."

Andrea waved at Dean and Cas as she followed her brood to the swings.

Sam and his family arrived and the noise level ratcheted up.

Dean and Cas leaned against the railing. The shrieking of the six children as they ran and played brought smiles of happiness to their faces. 

Dean put an arm around Cas's shoulders. 

"We're gonna have that. Screaming and yelling. Running."

"I know. I can't wait."

"Andrea, would you like to see the baby's room?"

"Is water wet? Yes, show me."

"Me, too," Jess chimed in as the trio headed inside.

"I know it's different but the name on the swatch called to me. Blissful."

Cas walked through the open bedroom door.

"Oh, Cas. It's beautiful. I love it," Jess said breathlessly.

The light, airy lavender walls were complemented by stark white trim. In the center of the room sat the crib. The pickled oak had a soft, pale matte look to it—not shiny or plastic. It gave the room an ethereal, delicate feel. There was a sheer, white canopy over the bed.

The ceiling was a shade or two darker than the walls, mimicking the evening sky. There were fairy lights across the ceiling. Cas flipped a switch and they twinkled like the stars in the sky.

There were paintings on the walls, three dragons in varying shades of purple.

Jess and Andrea stepped closer to the crib and reached out to touch the bedding. The comforter was white. In the middle was a sleeping purple dragon, his tail curled around their body.

Jess slid her arm through Cas's and laid her head on his shoulder. 

"She's going to be so loved," Jess whispered.

Cas placed a soft kiss on her blond curls.

Andrea stepped into their space and kissed Cas's cheek.

"Benny and I are so happy for you two. If you need anything, anything at all, you ask," she said, her dark brown eyes boring into blue.

He nodded and she wrapped both Jess and Cas into a tight hug.

"Cas! Foods ready!"

The three friends chuckled and began to leave the nursery.

Cas stopped at the doorway and gave the room one last look before he flicked off the twinkling lights.

The lobby of Modern Alliance was decorated to evoke a calm, soothing atmosphere.  

Dean's leg was bouncing up and down. His eyes trained on the aquarium.  

Cas set his hand on Dean's thigh. Grounding him.

"Dean," Cas said softly, "breathe."

"I am. It's just…," Dean exhaled loudly. "Paperwork."

Before Cas could reply, an office door opened and a smartly dress woman stepped put.

"Dean? Castiel? Come with me."

Cas and Dean stood and crossed the threshold. They settled in their seats and looked around the room.

Hannah Johnson's office was warm and welcoming. There were framed photos of happy families lining the walls.

Hannah looked across her desk and gave them a small, warm smile as she slid a thick stack of documents and two pens toward them. There were yellow 'Sign Here' flags peeping out.  

​"I know this looks intimidating," Hannah smiled, her tone deeply reassuring. "But today is mostly about formalizing the match, going over state disclosures, and laying out what the next few weeks are going to look like leading up to the birth."

After forty-five minutes of being told where to sign, Hannah gathered the completed forms and straightened them into a neat stack.

"Do you have any additional questions? Concerns?"

Dean cleared his throat.

"Um, how's she doing?" Dean asked quietly.

Hannah's expression softened.

"I know she wants a closed adoption. Cas and I respect that. It's just," he rubbed the back of his neck. "She's seven months pregnant. Is she safe? Does she need anything?"

Cas looked at Dean, love shining from his eyes. He reached over and took Dean's hand in his. Twining their fingers together.

"She's carrying our daughter," he continued, throat tight. "I need to know she's being cared for."

Hannah leaned back in her chair and considered her words carefully.

"She is safe, Dean," she said gently. "I can't say too much but she is with a very supportive aunt. The agency is covering her expenses through the fund your two set up. She has a great doctor and her social worker checks on her twice a week."

Her gaze shifted between them.

"If it makes you feel better, she asked about you two yesterday. We let her know how excited you both were. She smiled. She's happy with her decision."

A heavy silence filled the room. Dean looked down at his lap, nodding slowly. A tiny grateful smile crossed his face.

"Good," he whispered, voice gruff. " That's… good. I guess that's all I needed to know."

Cas squeezed Dean's hand.

"Anything else?"

"I know we've gone over this before, but what exactly is the timeline?" Cas asked softly. "In Kansas… can she change her mind after the twelve hour waiting period?"

Her gaze filled with empathy. "I know this is terrifying but under state law, she cannot sign until twelve hours after birth," she looked across the desk. Dean and Cas gave a small nod. "But once that time has passed and she signs the paperwork, the baby is yours. She could try to contest the adoption, but she would need to show coercion. Do you understand?" 

Cas nodded.  

"In my experience, when an expectant mother asks the kind of thoughtful questions she asked about your profile, it's because she is looking for reassurance that she has made the right choice. Not looking for a reason to back out."

She cleared her throat and pulled out a blue folder. "Let's discuss the hospital plan for September."

The call from the hospital came at four thirty-three pm on September eighteenth. Cas and Dean were planning to spend a quiet evening celebrating Cas's birthday.

The house phone rang just as Dean set store bought cake on the counter.  

"Hello?"  

"Hello Dean. This is Hannah from Modern Alliance."

"Hey, Hannah. How's everything?"

"Well, Dean. I wanted to let you and Castiel know that your baby girl was born about twenty minutes ago. Mother and baby are resting. The baby is healthy."

"How is the birth mom? Is she okay?"

Cas walked into the kitchen and stood in front of Dean. A pinched expression on his face. Dean pulled him close and wrapped a comforting arm around his waist. Dean tilted the phone so Cas could hear the conversation.

"Yes, Dean. She is doing as well as can be expected. She is spending some quiet time with baby right now," she continued gently.

"The twelve hour window has started. We wanted to give you and Cas time to get your bearings and head over to the hospital. We have a room reserved for you both close by."

Dean swiped at his eyes and nodded. HIs throat closed. Cas reached over and took the phone from Dean's hand.

"Thank you for the call, Hannah. We will head that way."

Dean hung up the phone.

He turned to Cas, a small smile curling the corner of his mouth.

"Happy birthday, Cas."

Cas's blue eyes were shining. 

The room was quiet, tucked down at the end of the hall away from the bustling nurses station.  

Cas sat on the moderately comfortable sofa while Dean paced a hole in the tiled floor.

The bassinet in the middle of the room was empty. Cas kept checking the clock. Mentally doing the math.  

They ate dinner down in the cafeteria.  

The sounds of muffled baby cries crept under the door. Every time a baby cried, Dean tensed and looked toward the door.  

Four am was a long ways away.

Dean and Cas had dozed off.

His head rested on Cas's shoulder. Cas jerked awake. Eyes falling on the empty bassinet.

He looked at his watch, three fifty-two. His heart began to beat faster in his chest.

"Dean," he said softly rubbing a hand on Dean's thigh.

Dean slowly opened his eyes and stretched.

"What time's it?"

"It's almost four," Cas whispered. He stood up and went to the bathroom to splash some water on his face.

Dean waited until Cas was done and took care of himself.

They met in the middle of the room, wrapping their arms around each other, lightly swaying. Taking comfort and strength from each other. 

The soft knock that sounded on the door, had them separating and linking hands.

The door was slowly pushed open and a nurse walked in, followed by Hannah.

In the nurse's arms was a small bundle of blankets. She had a kind smile on her face.

"Here you are dads."  

She moved closer and Cas opened his arms. She made the transfer smoothly. Dean leaned in close to see.

Her eyes were closed, blue veins showing through on the pale skin. Tiny fists were curled near her pink cheeks.

Dean reached out with a trembling finger and traced over her forehead stopping near her fist. At his touch, her fingers unfurled and grasped onto Dean.

The rush he felt was dizzying. Heart racing.  

Happy was such a pale, bland word to describe what he was feeling.

Cas leaned down and pressed his nose to the soft fuzz on top of her head. The scent hit him. A mix of warm skin, cotton blanket and newborn magic.

His eyes stung from the overwhelming emotion.

His heart felt full. Complete.

Cas and Dean looked at each other. Eyes shining bright.

Ecstatic. Rapturous. Blissful.

"She's ours, Cas."

Cas and Dean moved as one to sit on the sofa.

Hannah approached and held out a small envelope.

"She wrote you a small note. You can read or not in your own time. I'll be in the hall if you need me."

Hannah nodded and left the room.

Dean gripped the envelope tightly between thumb and forefinger.

"Do you want me to open it?" He asked quietly. 

Cas nodded, "Yes. She gave us this gift. I'd like to know what she was thinking. Don't you?"

Dean slid open the envelope and pulled out a single sheet of paper. Hospital stationary. 

Cas and Dean.

The moment I knew I was pregnant was also the moment I knew I could not provide the life this baby deserves.  

Thank you for stepping up and giving her the love and life I couldn't.

As you raise this beautiful child, I ask only one thing: please tell them that my choice was not made because I didn’t want them, but because I wanted everything for them. Tell them I loved them enough to let them go.

I have given you my heart. I wouldn't have done that if I didn't believe with my whole being, that you two would make wonderful parents.

With deepest gratitude, 

Joy

Dean carefully put the sheet of paper back into the envelope and slipped it into his back pocket.

Their eyes met.

Cas released a slow breath.

"Her name was Joy."

Dean nodded.

They both looked down at the baby in Cas arms.

"What about Felicity Joy Winchester?"

Dean slid an arm behind Cas's back and the other one slipped to help cradle the baby.

"Welcome to the world, Felicity Joy."