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Genya couldn’t stop shaking all day.
He was overthinking it—his mom had said so fifteen times that morning alone—but knowing he was overthinking was far different from being able to control the overthinking.
It wasn’t even supposed to be a big deal! Okay, sure, if given the opportunity, Genya wanted to confess his feelings that night, to tell Tanjiro exactly what he felt for him and how desperately he wanted to be with him—but that was only if he got the chance. Asking him to go to the fireworks that night wasn’t the big deal; it was only a set up.
A set up that was beyond terrifying to set up.
He could see Tanjiro, lounging against a brick wall outside the bookstore they agreed to meet at. He was wearing headphones, probably oblivious to Genya’s approach, his head bowed over his phone as he—Genya assumed—texted someone. The corner of his mouth quirked with a breathless chuckle and he shook his head, his ponytail draping over one shoulder after he stilled again. His ears turned a pretty pink, then he replied to whatever message had amused him. He’d only just switched off his phone when Genya made it to his side, stuffing his hands in his pockets and waiting for Tanjiro to see him.
He noticed almost the instant his phone turned off. His eyes flicked over then his head jerked up, a bright smile erupting across his face as his gaze locked on Genya. His headphones were moved to his neck in a blink and his arms were around Genya’s shoulders a split second later, tugging him down and close. Genya laughed lightly, though the sound trembled just as badly as his hands, which he withdrew from his pockets to wrap around Tanjiro’s waist.
“How are you?!” Tanjiro asked emphatically, far louder than the closeness called for. His cheek was hot from where it pressed against Genya’s and stretched in a wider grin. “I’ve missed you! We’ve barely seen each other since summer started!”
“I know, I’m sorry,” Genya agreed, “I’ve been busy at home. All’s been good, though. And you?”
“Oh, it’s been great!” Tanjiro pulled back from the hug then, though he kept his hands on Genya’s shoulders, which did absolute horrors to his heart rate. He tried to keep a calm smile on his face, though it felt too tight and twisted with how much his cheeks burned. “I’ve been working at the bakery a whole bunch—you should come visit sometime soon! I’ll get you something on the house.”
“You don’t have to do that,” Genya told him, but Tanjiro just shook his head.
“I want to! Really, it’ll be my pleasure!” Tanjiro’s hands slid down Genya’s arms and grabbed his hands, squeezing both before starting to tug him onwards, towards the bookstore. “Come on! I wanted to show you this new series I found!”
They wandered the bookstore for an hour or so, Genya wasn’t really certain. He lost track of time almost immediately, to be honest. His heart had yet to calm down and his skin was still flushed a prickling red and he could barely pay attention to anything Tanjiro said, no matter how much he wished to. His friend was just so damn pretty when talking about the things he enjoyed, and this new book series he’d mentioned was no exception. Even as they drifted between different aisles and found a few things to purchase, his conversations kept dragging back to the story. Genya wasn’t complaining, though. His inability to focus on and remember what Tanjiro was saying hardly stopped him from loving it all the same, especially when those pretty red eyes glittered up at him, so full of joy and excitement it almost made him dizzy.
They stopped at the bookstore’s small cafe on the way out—Genya buying himself a small latte and Tanjiro getting an iced tea—then they were on the sidewalks again. Tanjiro had a short shift at his family’s bakery that afternoon apparently, so Genya offered to walk him there. Just to be cordial, he said. Just being friendly. No unnecessarily terrifying questions to ask.
God, he needed to get his shit together and ask that damn question. The fireworks were that night, he didn’t have time to delay.
And yet, they made it all the way to the Kamado bakery, and Genya still hadn’t brought it up. When Tanjiro reached for the door, he officially panicked.
“Well, it was so good to see you,” Tanjiro said, fingers wrapped around the handle but the door still closed. He smiled warmly at Genya, who did his best to match the expression. Come on, Genya, just ask! Get it over with! “We should do this again soon! I really have missed you.”
“Me too,” Genya croaked. “We’ll, uh…plan for that…I’ll text you.”
“Cool!”
“Yeah.”
Just ask, Genya, for god’s fucking sake!
Tanjiro pushed the door open slightly. The bell hung above it rang cheerily, echoing in Genya’s head like Tanjiro’s voice so often did. “Well, I’ll see you then!” He chirped, then turned and stepped inside the bakery. Genya’s heart thudded in his throat. His legs started to shake and his whole head swayed on his shoulders. Ask, dammit!
“Tanjiro, wait,” he blurted, finally speaking before he lost the nerve—and his consciousness. Tanjiro stopped immediately, freezing in place and blinking expectantly at Genya. Genya swallowed. “Are you…are you going to the fireworks tonight? At the academy, I heard they’re setting some off for the fourth—apparently there’s a whole carnival too?”
“Oh!” Tanjiro released the door, allowing it to close again and stepping forwards. “Yeah! Nezuko mentioned, she invited me,” he said. “Apparently she’s going with a couple of friends, but I wasn’t too sure myself. I asked Zenitsu if he wanted to join too, but he doesn’t like fireworks, so…” he shrugged, “a solid maybe, I guess?”
Genya took a breath. Okay. He could do this. “Would you want to go with me?” He asked. He said the words far too primly than the situation called for, ennunciating each syllable in the fear that, otherwise, he’d stumble through all of them. It sounded awkward and clunky to his own ears, but Tanjiro’s grin returned full force when he heard them, pink blush dazzling his cheeks and sparkling in his eyes.
“Yeah, I’d love that!” He cheered, which helped Genya breathe a little easier at least. “I’ll meet you there around…five? I get off at three, so that’ll give me time to shower and change—plus then we can watch the sunset too, before they start! I’ll bring a blanket for us to sit on.”
Genya just nodded, lightheaded at how quickly Tanjiro was speaking (and how quickly he’d agreed to the invitation). “Yeah, sounds good,” he managed to agree, and gave Tanjiro a weak mimic of his grin.
“Okay! Awesome!” Tanjiro reached out, one hand darting forward to grab Genya’s. His fingers were exceptionally hot when they twisted together, yet Genya couldn’t help but squeeze them regardless, holding him tight. It made Tanjiro laugh a little, which made everything worth it. His cheeks flushed darker, into a nice and proper red. “I’ll see you later,” he added, softer than before, then released Genya and turned back around, finally slipping inside his family’s bakery to start his shift—though he waved farewell at the last moment, before the door could close him in. Genya returned the gesture, staring at his departing figure through the glass far longer than was decent.
Step one done.
Now, for the significantly more terrifying part.
⋆*ੈ𑁍
Genya found Tanjiro standing outside their school’s massive back field with a quilt tied over his shoulders like a cape and a strangely nervous expression. He’d changed from his earlier clothes, as he said he would, now in a pair of pink shorts and a white t-shirt. His ponytail had been swapped too for a half-up-half-down look, which suited him remarkably well, and made Genya’s face almost unbearably hot as he wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans and walked over to meet him.
Like he had that morning, Tanjiro lit up the moment he noticed Genya, his usual smile breaking through his apparent anxiety and that cute blush returning to his cheeks. He skipped over to meet Genya halfway, though he didn’t pull him into a hug this time; instead, he grabbed one of the corners of his quilt-cape and held it up for Genya to see.
“Told you I’d bring a blanket!” He chirped, as if Genya ever had cause to not believe him. “I already know where we should set it up for the sunset and fireworks too, whenever we’re ready—unless you had somewhere in mind already.”
“Nah, that’s cool,” Genya told him, shrugging a little, trying (and failing) to keep calm while Tanjiro stared so prettily at him. “I trust wherever you pick.”
“Okay, awesome! It’ll be great, I promise.” He pointed behind himself then, back towards the field and the plethora of stands and little rides tucked within it. “Wanna go get something to eat? I smell kettle corn, and I am dying to get a bag.”
“Can you smell hotdogs too?”
“A whole bunch of ‘em.”
“Perfect, let’s go then.”
Genya held out his arm for Tanjiro as they turned to head on. He wasn’t quite sure where the gesture came from, and felt his entire body flush scorchingly hot with it, but Tanjiro luckily didn’t turn it into a big deal. His hand looped through Genya’s elbow and he squeezed his arm with only a bright giggle and grin, then they were walking forwards, and it was no big deal. That’s what Genya kept telling himself.
It was no big deal.
You know: his crush was holding his arm and they were basically on a date—no biggie!
Genya thought he was going to faint.
He managed to stay conscious, though! He and Tanjiro meandered through the vendors and attendees with Genya still standing, so he took that in itself as a win. They stopped by a kettle corn stand first to buy Tanjiro a bagful—Genya insisted on paying for it, which he only succeeded in doing after full-body shoving Tanjiro out of the way of the cashier—then a little further for a pair of hotdogs for Genya, which he scarfed down immediately. He hadn’t eaten much that day, nervous as he was, so the food was more than appreciated.
The little carnival the school had put up for the holiday was an honestly impressive one, completed with a couple small rides that Genya gently declined going on. He didn’t trust himself to not hurl, no matter how slow and short they may have been. Tanjiro didn’t seem to mind much anyway, and there were plenty more mini games that captured both their attention. Most were rigged—they discovered that sly trick after only one game—but when Genya spotted a shooting game, he couldn’t help but test his luck regardless. He ushered Tanjiro over to it immediately, leaning down to talk in his ear over the din of carnival noise.
“See any prizes you like?” He asked, trying to be suave. Tanjiro giggled and leaned against Genya, squeezing his arm and tilting their faces so close together that Genya could feel his next exhale. It made him a little weaker than he cared to admit, which was a lot.
“Well,” Tanjiro drawled, “that is a very nice teddy bear on the top row…”
Genya glanced at the stand. Sure enough, listed as the highest prize, probably half of Tanjiro’s size, a massive teddy bear hung on a hook. It could only be won with a perfect score—a nigh on impossible thing to achieve in these sorts of games—but that twinkle in those ruby eyes was undeniable, and Genya was nothing if not a betting—if foolish—man. He nodded, and patted Tanjiro’s hand.
“What you ask you shall receive,” he said, then broke free of his grasp and approached the booth. He heard Tanjiro giggle excitedly behind him, which was probably the perfect motivator he could have ever given. A small payment later, and Genya had a toy rifle in hand, pressing it into his shoulder and raising to aim.
Like most of the others, this game was clearly rigged. The toy—barely good enough to be called a gun—had a slight weight to the barrel, right at the tip to drag the shot. Clever. Petty, but clever. Also—unfortunately for them—easily countered by simply aiming higher. Genya had to admit a certain sort of pride as he tilted the barrel upwards and fired: five shots for five targets, all squarely scored.
One awkward interaction with the overly befuddled booth worker later, and Genya was passing that massive teddy bear to Tanjiro. He accepted it giddily, practically bouncing on his toes as he squeezed his arms around it. As Genya had thought, it was basically half his size, dwarfing his figure even as he craned his neck out of its fluffy fur to grin blindingly up at Genya.
“It’s perfect, I love it!” He cheered, before burying his face back into its chest, so Genya almost couldn’t hear his follow up sentence of: “I’m going to name it Genya.”
But—either unfortunately or luckily for both of them, Genya wasn’t sure—he did hear him, and his whole face erupted with heat like one of the fireworks they were due to watch. “Why would you name it that?” He quipped, and Tanjiro giggled again.
“So then I can hug you when you’re not there!” Tanjiro explained, voice still muffled from where he pressed into Bear Genya. Genya snorted, but the ridiculousness did little to stave away his embarrassment—or that swelling adoration that threatened to buckle him right at that moment. God, he had to keep himself together. Just hold out a little longer, and he could finally get this weight off his chest.
Even if the idea of doing so still made him want to pass out.
“The sun’s gonna be setting,” he said then, because he desperately needed to say something, anything else, and it was true anyway. Tanjiro peeked around Bear Genya to see and verify, which he did with wide eyes and jumping feet.
“Oh! It is! Come on!” He shouted, before unwinding one hand to grab Human Genya’s and dragging him off through the carnival. Genya wasn’t entirely certain how he managed to not hit a singular person or trashcan with Bear Genya blocking his vision, but he did manage it anyway, and soon enough they were picking their way through a semi-emptier part of the field.
A few other people had clearly also decided this would be the best place to watch the fireworks, as they had to pass through and between several groups on camping chairs, inside wagons, and atop picnic blankets. For a moment, Genya actually started to worry it was too good of a placement, and they would be completely surrounded when the time came—something he would really rather not happen—but then Tanjiro took a sharp left and the amount of people began to wane until they were almost completely alone. Tanjiro made a triumphant little noise, then handed Bear Genya to Human Genya and untied the blanket from his neck.
“I tried to find somewhere with a good view but not a lot of people,” he explained as he draped the quilt on the ground and plopped down on top of it. He sent his cheery grin up at Genya. His cheeks were red again. “I didn’t want to be disturbed, but we can always move closer if you’d—”
“Here’s perfect,” Genya interrupted before he could suggest such a thing. Tanjiro just shrugged as reply, though that red in his cheeks flushed into his ears as well, painting a pretty line across his pretty face. Genya took as deep of a breath as he could manage, then passed the bear to Tanjiro before sitting down beside him. His heart had switched to a jackhammer’s pace, drilling holes into his ribcage and turning every small movement he took into a trembling mess, so he tucked his hands in his lap to hide their shaking and gave Tanjiro a tight lipped smile. Tanjiro returned it with a dazzling grin of his own, though only after situating Bear Genya in the space between them.
It was silent for a couple minutes after that, which wouldn’t have been odd for Genya if Tanjiro wasn’t his companion. When they were first becoming friends, Genya hardly spoke at all—a leftover stubborn trait of his from when he was still convinced he hated the guy—but it was never a problem. Tanjiro had an endless well of words and conversations inside of him, one that bubbled over constantly and begged to be heard. Honestly, it was part of what made Genya’s crush on him start and bloom as it did. He could fill any silence, break any sort of tension with a few choice words. It was incredible, and it comforted Genya like nothing else. And yet, for some reason, right now his dear friend wasn’t saying a peep.
A glance at him showed Tanjiro looked perfectly chipper. He sat cross-legged on the quilt, hands folded in his lap and fingers tapping out random patterns on his shoes. He swayed slightly side-to-side—he was never one for sitting completely still—and his head twisted to and fro, eyes darting over every inch of the world he could see. That red blush was still embedded beneath his freckled skin, refusing to abate—honestly, if anything, it seemed to be growing: seeping up through his nose onto his brow and down into his throat. A longer stare at his twirling fingers proved too that, like Genya, he was shaking. Was he nervous? Was Genya making him nervous?
Or, possibly, was he nervous for the same reason as Genya?
Genya turned sharply away from him then, sending his own gaze to the sun, almost completely beneath the horizon.
Maybe…maybe this was a sign. Could it be that Tanjiro shared the same feelings Genya harbored for him? Could this night actually end as he dreamed it would?
He took a shaky breath.
Was now a good enough time to ask?
“Tanjiro—” he started, only to be interrupted literally immediately.
“Tanjiro!” Came the different voice—Nezuko, Genya realized with a start, spinning around to see Tanjiro’s sister jogging their way. Tanjiro leapt in place too, far more surprised to see her than Genya would have expected.
“Nezuko!” He hollered back, though there was an odd hesitancy to his tone that had Genya shifting to give him a weird look. Tanjiro didn’t notice his stare though, instead smiling shyly up at his sister as she approached and dropped to her knees in front of them.
“I thought you said you weren’t coming tonight,” she said, giving Genya a pointed look before raising both her eyebrows at her brother.
Tanjiro laughed awkwardly under her stare and scratched at the nape of his neck, turning his face away from Genya and Nezuko alike. “I, uh, actually just said I wouldn't be joining you, not that I wasn’t coming…” he corrected with an uncharacteristic shyness. Genya couldn’t help but lean forward, trying to peek at his face. All he could see was his cherry-red blush.
“Oh, well,” Nezuko shrugged, “if you feel like joining, I’m sitting over there with Aoi and Kanao.” She pointed behind her, back towards the groups of people they’d walked through to get here. Tanjiro followed her pointing finger, but his eyes blew a little wide at the suggestion, and he quickly waved her off.
“No, no, we’re fine over here!” He assured, far more frantic than necessary.
Nezuko shrugged again, but there was a new glint in her gaze that twinkled when she sent Genya a wink. “No problem! Offer’s there if you want it! Have fun.” She winked again, which made Genya’s throat way too hot, then got back to her feet and skipped away. Tanjiro released an audible breath when she disappeared and slouched in place—though he was quick to sit up again when Genya turned to him.
“You didn’t want to go with her?” He asked—a little redundantly, but come on! Who was he to pass up that affirmation?
And sure enough, Tanjiro shook his head slowly, giving Genya a bashful grin. “I wanted to go with you,” he replied. Genya’s heart skipped ten million beats.
“Oh,” was all he could think to say, entirely too warm and giddy now, “cool.”
“Yeah, uh…” Tanjiro giggled to himself, then glanced sideways, towards the sun and its final touches across the horizon. He fell quiet again as it finished its descent, steadily darkening the sky and speeding Genya’s heart. He couldn’t figure what else to do besides sit there, watching the sun set in equal silence, so that was what he did. Only after it had fully disappeared did Tanjiro turn back to him. His honey toned skin still shone bright red even under the dusk-dim skies. He looked stunning. Genya could barely breathe.
“Genya,” Tanjiro said softly. Genya nodded for him to continue. Tanjiro inhaled. “There’s, uh…there’s this thing I wanted to say—”
But, as it turned out, it was Tanjiro’s turn to be interrupted, this time with a bone-shaking boom as the first firework went off.
Cheers erupted through the gathered crowds, but Tanjiro and Genya didn’t join in. They both jumped, simultaneously startled, and spun to see the colors fizzling in the sky. A split second later, and several more went up, crackling and exploding and earning even more hurrahs. Tanjiro laughed, shoulders relaxing as his fright diffused again.
“That scared me,” he breathed, eyes still fixed on the sky and the fireworks, but Genya had turned away from them.
He couldn’t help but stare at how nicely the colors reflected and shone in Tanjiro’s eyes, tinted in their ruby hue but only that much more beautiful for it. A thin clump of hair had slipped from his half-ponytail, so Genya reached out and tucked it behind his ear—maybe letting his fingers trail a little longer than needed, if just to toy with his hair and bump against those wooden earrings. Tanjiro peeked at him through the corner of his eye, smile falling limp but expression no less in awe. Genya swallowed a breath that failed to fill his lungs, and firmly met that sideways stare.
Now or never.
“I like you,” he confessed, barely louder than the breaths that refused to satiate, barely loud enough to be heard through the cracking fireworks. Tanjiro’s eyes flared wide and he shifted in place, twisting to see Genya fully and probably hear him better. Genya’s heart ached when he did, uncertain if it wanted to die of happiness or terror quite yet.
“I like you too,” Tanjiro echoed kindly.
Definitely terror.
Genya shook his head. “No, I mean I really like you,” he corrected. Tanjiro’s smile started to return, quirking up the corners of his mouth and crinkling his eyes. Genya kept talking. “I’ve kinda had this massive crush on you for ages now,” he admitted, “and I just couldn’t keep it to myself any longer. You don’t have to feel the same, and we never have to talk about this again if you don’t wanna, I just…wanted to say that. I really like you, Tanjiro.”
“‘Don’t have to feel the same’?” Tanjiro repeated, grin fully reformed and a giggle in his voice. Genya shut his mouth and nodded mutely. “Genya, what did you think I meant by ‘I like you too’?”
“Uh…” Genya blinked. More fireworks went off, like a discordant harmony to his erratic heartbeat. “That you like me as a friend? That we are…friends?”
Tanjiro’s laughter erupted then, cute and sweet and glorious in that way only he could be. Genya could only stare at him, confusion and excitement mixing into something almost like anticipation as Tanjiro brushed a hand over his own hair then reached out and did the same to Genya. His palm was soft and his fingers warm as they fed through his mohawk, soon settling on his nape and making him shiver. He leaned unconsciously forward with the pressure, and Tanjiro bent to match, until they were eye-to-eye, so close that Genya could feel their breaths combining. His heart thudded in his throat and a nervous smile began to tug on his mouth, some part of his mind deciphering what Tanjiro was about to ask even before he opened his mouth.
“Can I kiss you?” Was his question, so soft and timid it was barely a sentence at all. Genya nodded immediately, already nudging closer, brushing their noses together and stealing Tanjiro’s breath with an inhale of his own.
“Yeah,” he whispered, then with another echoing boom of a firework, Tanjiro’s mouth was on his.
He tasted like kettle corn and strawberry. He exhaled through his nose, hot against Genya’s cheek, and pressed closer. His fingers tightened on Genya’s nape, and in response, Genya stretched out a trembling hand to grasp at his waist, fitting the soft curves of his body easily within his palm. His head spun like a top as Tanjiro kissed him, so slowly, and every single nerve in his body tingled like the fizzling fireworks in the sky. His heart took a hiatus off somewhere in the world of daydreams and fantasies, giving his pulse enough clarity to finally fully realize: they were kissing.
Tanjiro Kamado was kissing him. He was kissing Tanjiro Kamado. His best friend, his crush, the person who had fought endlessly to break down his walls and actually succeeded in the endeavor—they were kissing. He subconsciously tightened his hand on Tanjiro’s waist, urging him silently forward, desperate for more. Tanjiro obeyed.
Bear Genya must have tumbled out of the way at some point, Human Genya was admittedly unsure, nor did he care that much. Tanjiro crawled towards him, wrapping his arms around his neck and leaning against him like he could barely keep himself upright any longer, and that was all that mattered to Genya. He tied his own arm around Tanjiro’s lower back, though he kept his other hand flat on the quilt beneath to keep them upright. With how much the both of them were shaking, however, he figured it only a matter of time before his elbow buckled and they collapsed.
Sure enough, the piercing whistle of a firework caught them both off guard, and Genya’s arm gave way. He fell back onto the blanket with a huff of air, Tanjiro tumbling down with him and landing on top. His doe eyes blinked down at Genya, bright and glittering, and he grinned and giggled. Genya couldn’t help but breathlessly chuckle along when he saw that face. He lifted both his hands to tangle in his pretty hair, adoring the way Tanjiro’s eyelids fluttered and he sighed.
“Do you want to be my boyfriend?” Genya asked, not quite certain where the question came from but refusing to rescind it. Tanjiro’s grin only grew, with an excited nod.
“Yeah, I really do,” he agreed, then he was bending down again, capturing Genya in another kiss while fireworks rumbled in the background. It was like something out of those cheesy movies his mom loved, something from a fairytale or a storybook.
He wouldn’t have it any other way.