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Malia was leaning back on her hotel bed, scrolling through some of Kylie’s old TikToks on a rare afternoon free from all of the Wicked Wonderland press. She and the others did a BuzzFeed promo that morning, which led to Malia once again trying to draw Kylie into their old banter, or even just get the Latina to look at her, but to no avail. The one time Kylie looked in her direction, it was to send her a scathing glare.
Every failed attempt to get Kylie to talk to her left Malia feeling hollow and empty. She was fighting a losing battle with the consequences of her own actions. She knew she messed up; she knew that even before Kylie found out, and then she’d gone and made it worse by trying to cover up all she did instead of just coming clean. And now Kylie hated her for what she did. And Malia couldn’t even blame her. The guilt and grief ate at her every day and every night, but short of a miracle, Malia doubted she could ever earn back Kylie’s trust.
Currently, Malia was lost somewhere in Kylie’s “10 minute songs” era, getting thoroughly distracted by the old faded red, now more pink, money piece highlights Kylie sported at the time. She couldn’t help but chuckle at the homemade matcha drink in Kylie’s hands before the lyrics to the Taylor Swift song Kylie was currently doing a cover of caught her attention.
“-swallowing my pride standing in front of you saying I’m sorry for that night. I go back to December all the time-“
Tears filled Malia’s eyes thinking about the story behind the song. She remembered it truly being one of Kylie’s favorites. Remembered listening to Kylie hum or sing it on set sometimes, or while they were waiting to go live on press tours.
An absolutely absurd crazy thought occurred to Malia. She dropped her phone and sat up, mind running a mile a minute. Could that work? She snatched up her phone again and rewatched Kylie’s cover a few times before she switched to YouTube and pulled up Taylor’s original music video.
“I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile, so good to me, so right-“ Malia’s heart hurt at the lyrics. She’d never understood a song as clearly as she did in that moment. Her mind made up, Malia pulled herself off the bed and grabbed a notepad. She had work to do.
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“So, what do you think?” Malia asked the ginger whom she was on the phone with. Sharlize, Kylie’s best friend, closed her bedroom door behind her for privacy so a certain Latina wouldn’t overhear the conversation. Whenever Kylie didn’t have press interviews or challenges for YouTube videos, she was there, either crying on Shar’s shoulder or yelling to the world about how dumb men are.
“What do I think, Baker? I think you are out of your goddamn mind. You broke my best friend’s heart, and you don’t realize how much crying she has done over the past week alone.” Sharlize hisses quietly, not wanting Kylie to overhear. The ginger sat down on her bed and stared at the photos on the wall of her and Kylie over their seven years of friendship leading up to success for both of them. She remembered the promise they had made to each other that no matter what was going on, they would still make time for each other.
But the one promise she remembered the most was that she would do anything to make her best friend happy.
“But…” Sharlize started slowly, her eyes never leaving the photo of her and Kylie after she had won Miss. California. “I made a promise to my best friend a long time ago that I would do anything for her. She needs you more than she needs her music and matcha. I’ll help you, Malia, but this is your one and only chance to make things right, and if for ANY reason I sense she’s uncomfortable or overwhelmed, then I’m pulling her out. Deal?” The ginger sternly explained, standing up as she talked with her hand that wasn’t holding the phone.
You could hear Malia audibly gulp over the phone.
“Deal. Sharlize, you have no idea how much this-“
“Yeah, yeah, just remember to invite me to the wedding.”
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After securing Sharlize’s help and support, Malia’s plan took another month to fully set up. It required her to call in every favor owed, spend every spare second not doing promo for Wicked Wonderland, spend a lot more time in front of a camera than she anticipated, and somehow keep it all off the internet and away from Kylie, but finally, it was done. Malia sat in front of her laptop, now in an Airbnb for the week, staring at the file loaded and the glaring blue “Post” button.
Her heart hammered in her chest as she moved her mouse to hover over the button. This was unlike anything Malia had ever done in her life, but for Kylie? Malia would bring her the moon and stars; this was nothing. One more deep breath and Malia clicked it. Her video was now posted on every social media platform available. She also quickly grabbed her phone and sent Sharlize her own copy.
Now all she had to do was wait. And pray she did not throw up while she waited for Kylie’s reaction.
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Sharlize stared at the video file Malia sent her, momentarily debating if she should watch it first just to ascertain if the contents would hurt or heal her best friend, but she discarded the thought quickly before going to find Kylie. The video was meant for Kylie and Kylie alone; she deserved to be the first to see it. Plus, Malia also uploaded the video everywhere, meaning it was a matter of minutes before someone sent it directly to Kylie asking her thoughts. When, in reality, the video was only uploaded to show that Malia meant it. Their ‘breakup’ had been public and so too would be Malia’s apology. At least part of it.
Unsurprisingly, Sharlize found Kylie in the ginger's room scrolling on her phone. “Kylie,” She ventured softly, “There’s something you need to see.”
The Latina looked up with a concerned frown. “What? Did something happen?”
“Malia posted something for you.”
Kylie’s face instantly shut down, and Sharlize could practically feel the other girl’s walls going up. “You know I don’t want to see any of her stuff.”
Sharlize nodded, “I know, but-“ She broke off with a sigh. “Do you trust me? It’s really important that you watch this.”
For a few heartbeats, Sharlize was afraid Kylie would still reject the video, but a deep, resigned sigh later, Kylie was holding out her hand for the phone. Her face was still guarded, and given this was Malia, Shar did not blame her friend, but she hoped with everything in her that this was what Kylie and Malia both needed to heal.
She handed Kylie her phone with the video already cued and loaded before turning to leave the room. The Latina deserved privacy for something like this.
Kylie watched as Sharlize left the room, closing the door behind her with a soft click, the only noise being the shakiness of her breathing she hadn’t noticed until the room fell completely still. A part of her wanted to immediately hit play, but the other part, her defensive desire to guard her heart from any more damage, was in full play. Her so-called ‘best friend’ used a stupid AI-generated chat box to create a fake-assed apology as if their four years of friendship meant nothing to her, so why would this video be any different?
Kylie let out another shaky breath and held the key to unlocking a door, or leaving it boarded up forever, the nails holding place of what their friendship used to be. A once beautiful bouquet of roses that were destined to wilt under the LA sun. The Latina then thought about their friendship: years of sleepovers, inside jokes, FaceTime calls that lasted until the sun came up, and shared lunches that seemed more intimate than they were supposed to be. The actress wiped a tear that left her eye and hit play because honestly, what else did she have to lose after losing her Giggles Baker?
The phone screen lit up to show Malia sitting on a bar stool in a studio room; her hair was up in a bun, she was wearing one of Kylie’s old sweatshirts that she’d stolen well over a year ago, and she was holding her guitar, which was till covered in stickers Kylie herself put there one afternoon when she was bored.
She wasn’t looking at the camera; her eyes were downcast as she seemed to fiddle with her beloved guitar before the first few notes of Taylor Swift’s ‘Back to December’ rang out. Kylie recognized it instantly. It was one of her favorites after all.
Right before she started singing, Malia brought her head up to look directly at the camera, and Kylie felt as if Malia was staring at her.
“I’m so glad you made time to see me. How’s life? Tell me, How’s your family? I haven’t seen them in a while.”
A strange mix of shock and bewilderment almost made Kylie drop the phone. Was Malia really doing a full cover? Even as she watched, Kylie realized how well the lyrics fit. Malia’s voice was strong, but anyone who knew her could hear the pure emotion in her voice. She truly meant these words as she sang them, and she’d gone and posted it everywhere so that everyone knew it. Malia had done the one thing she hated the most just to get Kylie’s attention.
“Because the last time you saw me is still burned in the back of your mind.”
Kylie thought of their last FaceTime call where she confronted Malia about everything and watched as Malia denied it even though Kylie had proof, and her heart broke all over again. Malia was openly acknowledging what she’d done, though not in so many words, and apologizing.
“So this is me swallowing my pride, standing in front of you saying I’m sorry for that night. I go back to December all the time.”
On the screen, tears poured down Malia’s face, but her voice held steady. Matching tears rolled off of Kylie’s cheeks, and she made no move to wipe them away as she watched the only girl who had ever held her heart publicly open hers for the world to see.
“When your birthday passed, and I didn’t call.”
Kylie remembered the way she’d spent her entire birthday being as busy as possible so that she would not be waiting by her phone for a call. And yet somehow it still hurt when Malia never said a word to her. No call, no gift, not even a text. She’d spent what should have been one of the happiest nights of the year crying and eventually getting drunk to try and numb the pain Malia's absence caused.
Memory after memory flashed through Kylie’s mind of all the nights they spent with each other. All the times they’d been teased about being a couple. All the times Malia threw her head back to laugh at something Kylie said and all the times Kylie vowed it was the only sound she ever needed in her life.
“I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile, so good for me, so right. And how you held me in your arms that September night. The first time you ever saw me cry.”
Malia was still crying, but as she sang those words, an almost wistful smile crept onto her face as if she too was thinking about all the good times they had together. All the nights they were a hair's breadth away from being something more.
“Wishin’ I’d realized what I had when you were mine. I’d go back to December, turn around and make it alright. I’d go back to December, turn around and change my own mind. I go back to December all the time. All the time.”
As Malia sang those last words, something inside Kylie broke. She’d spent so long being hurt and angry with Malia that she didn’t know what to do with a genuine apology.
On screen, Malia gently set her guitar down and wiped some of the tears off her face. “I think you all know who this is for, but just to be clear…” She was looking directly at the camera again. Directly at Kylie. “Kylie, I'm so, so sorry, and I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it right. You don’t have to forgive me, but this is me saying I’m sorry.” Then the screen went black.
Something crushing settled over Kylie’s soul at Malia’s words. Tears fell from the Latina in heavy waves as she struggled to make sense of it all. It was too much, too overwhelming. All her hurt, anger, resentment, and betrayal boiled up along with all the new emotions Malia’s gesture brought, all of it overflowing and crashing down around her.
She didn’t realize how hard or loud she was crying until the muffled sound of Sharlize running back in and kneeling beside her caught her attention. Kylie was brought back to the night it all happened, her best friend telling her to breathe falling on deaf ears, as if she was alone in that room yet again.
Kylie’s breathing became more rapid as the seconds passed, the ginger becoming more and more concerned. The last time this happened, she’d gotten into a heated argument with her mom about something Shar couldn’t remember in that moment, but the one thing she could remember was the person who had calmed her down.
And that person was in an airb&b across the city.
Not wanting to startle the Latina mid-panic attack with a sudden touch, Sharlize reached for Kylie’s phone, put in the passcode, and opened her contacts. She had to hold back a full-on cackle when she saw that Malia was still under her favorites list.
Even after all this time, her best friend was still whipped as ever.
The dancer clicked on Malia’s contact and held her breath as it rang. She didn’t have to wait long as the call immediately connected.
“Kylie?-“ Malia breathed out, sounding cautious. Miss. California didn’t waste any time correcting the young actress.
“It’s me. I showed Kylie the video; she’s having a panic attack. It’s bad, and she needs you.” Shar quickly explained.
The sound of something thudding to the ground and fast shuffling followed her statement as Malia grabbed her shoes and ran outside.
“I’m on my way. Can you put me on speaker?” Malia requested as she climbed into her car and revved the engine, fully prepared to break every traffic law to get to Kylie.
Sharlize did as asked, switching the phone to speaker mode. “Okay, she can hear you now.”
“Kylie?” Malia’s voice was soft and gentle, somehow masking the worry she was feeling for her…friend. “Kylie, sweetie, can you breathe for me? I’m on my way, okay? Just keep breathing for me.”
15 agonizing minutes of trying to keep Kylie from passing out, Malia pulled up to Shar’s house and jumped out. She ran for the door, hoping it was unlocked because she did not want Kylie to be alone right now, even for a second. Mercifully, it was, and she pushed inside. She followed the sound of the ginger talking even as she promised Kylie she would be there in just a moment.
Upon arriving in Sharlize’s room, Malia took in the sight of Kylie on the bed, tears streaming down her face as heavy sobs wracked her body, making it impossible for her to breathe correctly, and Shar kneeling on the floor beside her valiantly attempting to calm her down.
Acting quickly, Malia hung up the call and tossed her phone to the side, not caring at all where it landed, and climbed onto the bed beside Kylie. The popstar did not have panic attacks often; honestly, Malia was the one more likely to panic when it came to filming or handling fans, but the few times this had happened, only one thing Malia did really seemed to help. And that’s exactly what Malia did.
She lay down and wrapped her arms tightly around the sobbing girl and squeezed. Kylie had admitted to her once that the tight pressure helped reassure her that someone was there and she wasn’t alone.
“I’m right here, Kylie.” Malia whispered in the singer's ear, “I’m right here, and I’m never leaving you again. You aren’t alone.”
Kylie’s hands weakly gripped the front of Malia’s shirt to pull her closer, but her sobs and breathing remained heavy and uneven. Drool and probably snot pooled on Malia’s shirt, but she paid it no mind. Her only focus was on calming Kylie down. She continued whispering reassurances into her ear and soft instructions to breathe.
After what felt like hours, Kylie seemed to calm a little. She followed Malia’s gentle instructions to mimic her breathing until they were both taking deep, even breaths, with Kylie still held tightly in Malia’s arms.
“That’s it, beautiful. Just breathe with me.” Malia soothed, already looking around for a tissue box, knowing Kylie got really stuffy from crying and would want to wipe her face and nose once she was ready to pull away.
Even knowing it was coming, Malia was still slightly saddened when Kylie pulled away and sat up facing away from the shorter girl. Wordlessly, Malia grabbed the tissue she spotted earlier and set them beside the Latina. She watched as the woman she loved took a few seconds to clean herself up, knowing Kylie needed that time to compose herself.
The sick feeling in her stomach was back. Would Kylie still reject her after all this? Did she like the video? Did she understand what Malia was trying to tell her? Would she even care? Or was Malia too late?
“Still using my location like a stalker, I see,” Kylie mumbled, her voice a little hoarse from all the crying.
Malia couldn’t help the small smile that cursed her lips. “What can I say? Gotta keep track of my victims.”
A raspy chuckle escaped Kylie before she turned around. Her eyes were red, and her face was a little puffy, but to Malia, she’d never looked more beautiful because for the first time in months Kylie was looking at her with something other than rage.
“Why are you here, Malia?”
“Because you needed me.” She said as if it was that simple.
Kylie shook her head wether in disagreement or disbelief, Malia didn’t know. “You don’t get to just show up here after everything you pulled. Do you have any idea how much it hurt to see you with him? To watch you lie to me about it?” She was getting worked up again, and Malia was quick to jump in.
“I know! I know I hurt you. I know I messed up. It was a stupid mistake.” She insisted.
“Then why, Malia? Why?” More tears brimmed in Kylie’s eyes.
“Because I was afraid, okay? I was afraid of everything I felt for you, and I didn’t want to lose the best friendship I’ve ever had.” Malia could hear the tears in her own voice, could feel them trying to escape, but more importantly, she needed Kylie to hear the sincerity in her voice.
Kylie scoffed. “You ruined it the minute you kissed Him.”
“Because I thought it was the closest I would ever get to kissing you!” The words left her mouth before Malia could stop them, and she pulled back, her eyes wide at what she’d just admitted.
Kylie’s eyes were wide too. “You…you wanted to kiss me?”
Slowly, Malia nodded and then, before she lost her nerve, “I’m not sure where my feelings changed, but somewhere in between all the late-night calls and the movie nights I…I fell in love with you. But I didn’t want to ruin what we had, so I made a stupid mistake, and I'm so, so sorry, Kylie.”
Kylie was silent, staring at her with something Malia couldn’t read in her eyes. “Are you still with him?” The Latina finally asked.
Malia quickly shook her head. “No. It was a stupid one-time thing that I regretted as soon as it happened, but he…well, you know. I haven’t talked to him since.”
Kylie shifted closer on the bed. “You should have just kissed me.” She whispered.
“I-“ Malia started to defend herself before Kylie’s words caught up with her. “What?”
“You should have just kissed me,” Kylie repeated, more sure of herself. “We could have avoided all this.”
Malia felt like her brain was short-circuiting. “I-uh…huh?”
Kylie laughed softly, and some fractured part of Malia’s soul healed at the once-familiar sound. “Do you want to know why it hurt so much that you kissed him?”
Malia nodded.
“It was never about him,” Kylie whispered, leaning even closer now. “It was about the fact he wasn’t me.”
And then Kylie was kissing her. It was fast, and both of their lips were a little dry, but it couldn’t have been more perfect. Malia even whined softly when Kylie pulled away, which made Kylie laugh softly.
Malia blinked her eyes open to find Kylie already looking at her. “You can’t just do that.” She protested.
“Can’t do what? Kiss you?” Kylie laughed.
“No,” Malia shook her head and, with one quick move, toppled Kylie onto the bed so she was hovering over the lithe dancer. “If you’re going to kiss me, you have to do it right.”
Kylie’s squeak of surprise was quickly silenced by Malia’s lips.