Work Text:
"Damn it. Not again. Seriously?"
Red launched herself onto her dorm bed, staring up at the popcorn ceiling in sheer disbelief. How could she be so endlessly, frustratingly dumb? This was becoming a habit: she’d lock in plans with one person, her brain would completely erase the memory, and she’d happily agree to hang out with someone else at the exact same time.
What was she even going to do now? Pick a favorite? Fake her own disappearance?
With a groan of defeat, she grabbed her pillow and aggressively smacked herself in the face with it.
She had managed to triple-book herself in a single afternoon: plans with her girlfriend, an offer to help Max test out his latest invention, and then there was Luis. What did Luis even need? Who knows. She had only said yes to make him shut up, and now it was coming back to haunt her.
Her phone vibrated violently against her hip. Pulling the pillow off her face, she squinched her eyes through messy hair at the glowing screen. A ton of notifications were already flooding in: a heart emoji from Chloe asking if they were still on for tonight, a frantic paragraph from Max about a "potential breakthrough (and minor fire hazard)," and a single, ominous “Great, see u at 5” from Luis.
"I'm dead," she whispered to the empty room. "I am literally going to die here on a twin XL."
Before her brain could fully spiral into a meltdown, a metaphorical lightbulb clicked on over her head.
Hazel.
The pirate was practically infamous for having every kind of potion imaginable, half of which she’d ended up brewing because of Max's chaotic experiments. It was a crazy idea, but it was the only one she had.
Red shot off the bed and bolted for the door, tearing through the crowded hallways of Auradon Prep in a desperate search. She rounded a sharp corner—and slammed directly into someone.
The rebel stumbled back, blinking in shock. Standing right in front of her was Hazel.
"Hazel!" Red exclaimed, eyes lighting up. "Just the person I needed to see!"
The pirate barely paused, eyeing her suspiciously. "What is it, Redhead? I don't have time for this—I'm busy."
"Listen, quick question," Red begged, lowering her voice. "Do you have any potions on you that could clone me? Or like... duplicate me for a few hours?"
Hazel stopped dead in her tracks, raising a single eyebrow. "A cloning potion? Red, those are strictly restricted. If Fairy Godmother catches anyone with that, it’s an automatic suspension."
"No one's getting caught!" she insisted, holding up her hands defensively. "It’s just... a minor scheduling conflict. Very minor. Three people, at the same time, total accident."
Hook let out a dry, amused laugh. "You triple-booked yourself and your brilliant solution is illegal duplication magic? Bold strategy."
"So... you do have one?" Red asked, her eyes wide with desperate hope.
Hazel reached into her satchel, her fingers brushing against a cool glass vial. "Maybe. But let me be crystal clear: if you mess this up, get dragged into detention, or turn yourself blue, my name was never mentioned. You stole it, you found it on the floor, you dreamt it up—whatever. I was never here."
"Deal! Total secret, cross my heart," she promised, leaning in closer. "Now hand it over!"
"It lasts three hours," Hazel warned, holding onto the vial just tight enough that Red couldn't snatch it immediately. "When the time's up, the copy snaps right back into you. And word of advice? Don't let your clone do anything too weird. You're going to share the memories when it's over."
"Three hours. Got it. You're an absolute lifesaver!" Red snatched the vial, popped the cork with her thumb, and downed the glowing liquid in one gulp before Hazel could even warn her about the taste.
Hazel winced. "You were supposed to drink half of it to make one clone—"
Red didn't hear the rest. Her stomach lurched, the world tilted sideways, and with a loud, resounding POP and a heavy cloud of shimmering crimson smoke, her body split. Her vision fractured into three.
Two identical copies stumbled out from her sides, sending all three Reds crashing into each other before tumbling into a messy heap on the hallway floor.
Hazel coughed, swatting the glowing mist away from her face, and stared down at the three identical girls groaning on the tile. "Unbelievable. You didn't even let me finish the instructions."
The three Reds sat up in unison, rubbing their heads.
"Whoa," said the Red on the left.
"Double whoa," said the Red in the middle.
"Wait, why are there three of us?!" squeaked the Red on the right, looking wildly back and forth between her duplicates.
"Because she drank the entire bottle, genius," Hazel muttered, pulling her hood up and stepping over Red Left's outstretched leg. "Congratulations. You got your duplicates. Now, remember our deal: I was never here, you stole that potion, and if any of you get turned into toadstools, I don't know you."
Without waiting for an answer, Hazel turned on her heel and hurried down the corridor, eager to put as much distance between herself and the oncoming disaster as humanly possible.
Left alone in the hallway, the three clones scrambled to their feet, staring at each other in a bizarre mix of awe and sheer panic.
"Okay," Original Red breathed, her voice dropping an octave in sheer desperation. "No more arguing. Red One, you take Max. Red Two, you take Luis. I'll handle Chloe."
Red Two immediately scoffed, crossing her arms. "Hold on. Why does she get to go hang out with Chloe? Chloe is our girlfriend. I want to hold her hand and hear her giggle, not get my eyebrows singed off in Max's lab!"
"Because I called it first!" Red One snapped, her cheeks flushing bright red. "Besides, I'm clearly the more romantic clone. You have 'lab explosion' written all over your face."
"Hey! We have the exact same face!" Red Two yelled back.
Original Red pinched the bridge of her nose, a massive headache blooming behind her eyes. "Guys! You're both me! We all love Chloe, but we have three jobs to do!"
"Yeah, but thinking about Chloe right now is making it really hard to care about Max or Luis," Red Two muttered, a dreamy, hopelessly smitten look washing over her face.
"Same," Red One sighed, clutching her heart dramatically. "She's just... so pretty. Remember when she smiled at us yesterday? What if I buy her flowers on the way over?"
"No, I'm buying her flowers!" Red Two argued, shoving Red One aside. "I'm going to Chloe's!"
"Not if I get there first!" Red One yelled, already taking off in a sprint down the corridor toward their shared dorm.
"Get back here, me!" Red Two screamed, sprinting right after her.
Original Red stood frozen in the middle of the hallway, watching two identical versions of herself physically tackle each other around the corner as they fought over who got to go on the date.
She looked down at her phone. Max was still blowing it up with frantic texts, and Luis was waiting.
"I made copies of myself," Original Red groaned, slapping a hand over her face, "and they're both actively trying to steal my girlfriend."
"Fuck, fuck, fuck!"
Original Red sprinted at full speed down the corridor, her heart pounding against her ribs as she desperately tried to catch up with her runaway duplicates.
She was this close to tackling them both into the carpet when a sharp, high-pitched gasp cut through the quiet hallway.
Oh, shit.
Rounding the corner, her boots squealed against the polished floorboards as she skidded to a halt outside her dorm room. The door was slightly ajar, warm light spilling out into the quiet hall. Holding her breath, she peeked through the crack—and her jaw practically hit the floor.
Her two clones weren't just staring anymore; they had launched a full-scale romantic ambush.
Clone One had wrapped her arms tightly around Chloe’s waist from behind, clinging to her like an over-enthusiastic koala and burying her face happily into the crook of her neck. Before the princess could even process the sudden hug, Clone Two was right in front of her, cradling her porcelain cheeks in both hands and smothering her skin in energetic, rapid-fire smooches.
Mwah! Mwah! Mwah!
Bright crimson lipstick marks were rapidly multiplying across Chloe’s left cheek, her forehead, her nose, and right along her jawline.
Having been standing with her practice sword drawn and ready for training just moments ago, Chloe was caught entirely off guard. The gleaming steel drooped in her trembling hand, completely forgotten. An absolute, fiery blush spread like wildfire across her skin, running all the way from her nose down to the pristine white collar of her navy blue uniform. Her usual sharp composure completely crumbled into a flustered, breathless mess. Her eyes were wide and dazed, her hands hovering uselessly in the air as she tried—and miserably failed—to lean away from the sensory overload.
"I—hold on—wait a minute—" Chloe squeaked out, her usually poise-filled voice cracking as her face burned hot.
The real Red slammed the door all the way open, her eyes bulging out of her head. "Oh my god! You two were supposed to go do my dirty work, not fall head-over-heels in love with my girlfriend!"
"Can you blame us?!" Red Two beamed, pausing her kiss-frenzied attack just long enough to glance back at the original, leaving one final, bright red imprint right on Chloe's burning cheek. "Look at her! The posture! The sword! The sparkling eyes! You gave us all your taste!"
"She's magnificent!" Red One swooned, squeezing Chloe’s waist even tighter and resting her chin blissfully on her shoulder with a heavy sigh.
"Back off, both of you!" Original Red snapped, rushing across the carpet and grabbing Clone Two by her leather jacket to physically yank her back. "She's my girlfriend! You two were literally created to cover my afternoon schedule!"
Chloe swallowed hard, standing completely paralyzed in the center of the room. Dotted with cherry-red kiss marks, her immaculate hair now slightly tousled, and blushing so hard she looked like she was about to combust, she blinked dazedly between the three identical faces standing before her.
"Red..." she rasped out, her breathing shallow as she raised a trembling hand to wipe her cheek—only to smear the wax further across her flushed skin. "A little help here?!"
"Yeah, yeah, I've got you," Red said softly, reaching past the chaos to gently grab her hand and pull the flustered princess directly into her arms. "Gotcha, Charming," she smirked, pressing a sweet, lingering kiss to her blush-stained cheek.
Chloe let out a shaky, shuddering breath, her hands coming up to rest against Red's chest as she melted into the embrace. The steady rhythm of her heartbeat beneath her palms was grounded and real.
"Hey! Hands off!" Red One yelled.
"She's not just yours!" Clone Two barked.
In a flash of total synchronized chaos, both clones lunged forward. Clone One slammed her hands into Original Red’s chest, giving her a hard shove that sent her stumbling backward onto the carpet with a loud "Oof!"
At the exact same time, Clone One and Clone Two grabbed Chloe by her arms—One taking her left wrist, Two seizing her right—and yanked the stunned princess backward into their grip.
"Get off her!" Original Red yelled, diving forward from the floor to wrestle her girlfriend back.
It was too late—the competition had officially peaked.
"Mine first!" Red One declared. With a forceful yank, she pulled Chloe close by her left arm, cupping the back of her neck and pulling her into a deep, dizzying kiss.
Chloe’s breath hitched sharp in her throat as a sudden, thrilling shock shot straight down her spine. Her heart hammered against her ribs like a runaway train. She knew she was supposed to be the sensible, disciplined princess here, but being swarmed with this much intense, shameless devotion from three identical Reds was secretly the best thing that had ever happened to her.
She melted into it instantly, her fingers tangling in the clone's jacket as a soft, helpless moan slipped from her lips—completely betraying how much she was adoring every second of this madness.
Before she could even catch her breath or fully sink into the warmth, Clone Two yanked her back by her right arm.
"No, mine!" Clone Two growled softly, sliding a hand to the small of Chloe's back and pulling her flush against her. She captured those soft lips in an even more desperate, breathless kiss, tilting her head to make it deeper until Chloe's entire body went soft and pliable in her grip.
Chloe let out a tiny, whimpering squeak into the kiss, her toes curling tight inside her boots. Caught in a whirlwind tug-of-war of identical, raw affection, she was floating on cloud nine. Her face went from a bright blush to a deep, burning crimson that radiated heat all the way to her ears.
Lipstick marks covered every square inch of her cheeks, jaw, and forehead, her pristine blue uniform was completely rumpled, and her eyes were dazed, spinning with pure, overwhelmed bliss.
"I... oh, star-cross me..." Chloe rasped out the second their lips parted, a dizzy, utterly enamored smile plastered across her flushed face.
Her knees went completely to jelly. Between the dizzying rush of adrenaline, the fiery kisses, and the sheer joy of knowing every single version of Red was helplessly obsessed with her, the sensory overload finally won. With a faint, blissed-out sigh still lingering on her lips, her eyes fluttered shut, her head tilted back, and her body went totally limp as she fainted dead away from sheer happiness.
"Chloe!" Original Red shrieked, diving across the room just in time to catch her princess before she hit the carpet.
Red cradled her safely against her chest, looking down at the completely flustered, unconscious girl—who, despite being passed out, still had a triumphant, goofy little smile tucked into the corner of her kiss-stained lips.
"Look what you idiots did!" Red snapped, glaring up at the two duplicates with a burning blush of her own. "You broke her! You broke my girlfriend!"
Both clones blinked down at Chloe's passed-out form, panting slightly and looking thoroughly guilty.
"Okay... yeah, that's fair," Red One admitted quietly, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. "Though, to be honest? She was really into that."
"Oh, she was definitely loving it," Red Two mumbled, taking a slow step back toward the door. "Which means when she wakes up, she's going to be completely unstoppable. We're just gonna go deal with Max and Luis now before she regains consciousness."
"Yeah, you go do that, you absolute idiots," Red muttered.
She slipped one arm under Chloe’s knees and the other around her back, scooping her up off the carpet with a soft grunt before marching over to the bed to lay her down gently.
Chloe sank into the pillows, her navy blue uniform delightfully rumpled. Even unconscious, that dizzy, triumphant little smile hadn't faded from her face.
Red leaned over, pulling the duvet up to her chest and gently tucking it in around her shoulders. She brushed a stray strand of blue hair away from Chloe’s flushed cheek, her own face burning as she looked down.
"You are unbelievable," Red whispered under her breath, a fond smirk tugging at her mouth.
She turned back toward the door, crossing her arms and narrowing her eyes at the two clones still lingering near the threshold.
"Alright, she is out cold," Red whispered harshly, pointing an accusing finger toward the hallway. "You two are officially evicted. Get out there and do your jobs before I figure out how to un-clone you early."
Red One gave a dramatic, silent salute, while Clone Two blew one last quiet kiss toward the bed. Then, squeaking in unison as Red took a threatening step forward, both duplicates turned on their heels and tiptoed rapidly out into the corridor, shutting the door behind them with a soft click.
Finally alone in the quiet room, Red let out a long sigh, walked back over to the bed, and sat down on the edge, keeping a watchful eye on her very flustered, very happy princess.
______
Two hours later, the dorm room was quiet, bathed in the soft glow of the late afternoon sun. On the bed, Chloe was still completely out cold, sleeping like a log with that same faint, blissed-out smile tucked into her lips and red lipstick smudges still faintly dusting her cheeks.
The door creaked open, and both clones tiptoed back inside, looking surprisingly exhausted from their chores. They immediately froze, their eyes landing on the bed.
"Hey, she's still out?" Clone Two whispered in disbelief, a mischievous smirk instantly creeping onto her face. She nudged Clone One with her elbow. "What if we have to kiss her to wake her up? You know, like a true love's kiss kind of deal?"
"Don't even think about it!" Original Red hissed from her chair beside the bed, throwing a pillow straight at Red Two's head.
Red Two ducked, laughing quietly. "Come on, Red! It's fairytale logic! Sleeping beauty over here clearly needs a magical kiss to break the spell!"
"She's not under a spell, she's sensory-overloaded because you two acted like wild animals!" Red snapped, keeping her voice down as she stood up and blocked the bed with her body. "Besides, if anyone gets to kiss her awake, it's me. The original!"
"Technically, we share the same soul, so it counts as you!" Clone One argued, taking a sneaky step closer with a grin. "Just one little wake-up kiss on the cheek. For scientific purposes!"
On the bed, Chloe’s eyelashes fluttered slightly at the hushed bickering. Her nose twitched, and a soft, drowsy hum slipped from her throat as she slowly started to stir, completely oblivious to the fact that her three Reds were already winding up for Round Two.
"Chloe... Chloe, babe," Red whispered, stepping closer and gently placing her warm hand over Chloe’s softly trembling fingers.
Chloe let out a low, heavy groan, her eyelids fluttering open. Her vision was blurry at first, focusing on the dark red hair and familiar eyes hovering right above her. She blinked a few times, reaching up with a hand to rub her groggy face.
"Ugh... I just had the weirdest dream," Chloe mumbled, her voice thick with sleep as she leaned into Red's touch. "There were three of you, and... and they started kiss—"
Chloe froze. Her words completely died in her throat.
As her eyes fully adjusted, she looked past Original Red’s shoulder and caught sight of the two clones standing at the foot of the bed. They were both grinning like maniacs, Clone Two giving her a little wave while Clone One tapped her own lips with a wink.
Chloe’s eyes went wide as silver dollars. Her glance darted down to her own hands, then to the sheets, and finally to her reflection in the mirror across the room—where bright crimson lipstick marks still clearly painted her cheeks and jaw.
"It... it wasn't a dream," Chloe squeaked, the scarlet blush instantly rushing back to her face in full force.
"Surprise!" Red Two beamed proudly. "True love's kiss worked! Sort of!"
"You're alive!" Clone One cheered, throwing her arms up in celebration. "We thought we broke the princess forever!"
Chloe’s jaw dropped, her throat making a tiny, overwhelmed squeak as she clutched the blanket to her chest, her mind completely spinning all over again.
Original Red pinched the bridge of her nose, letting out a loud, heavy sigh. "I swear, if Hazel's potion doesn't wear off in the next five minutes, I am throwing both of you out the window."
Chloe, meanwhile, was sitting bolt upright in the middle of the bed, her hands clutching the duvet to her chin. Her face was still burning a magnificent shade of deep, fiery scarlet, but as she looked at the three identical, hopelessly smitten faces surrounding her, the sheer absurdity of the situation finally caught up to her.
A quiet giggle bubbled up from Chloe’s chest, quickly turning into full-blown, breathless laughter.
"You three are absolutely, completely out of your minds," Chloe wheezed, leaning back against the headboard and shaking her head in utter disbelief. "I am the daughter of Cinderella. I am supposed to deal with glass slippers and midnight balls, not a three-headed dragon of kissing bandits!"
Clone One grinned, resting her chin on the bedpost. "Yeah, but admit it, Bluey... you loved having three of me around to shower you with love."
"And admit it," Clone Two smirked, winking at the flustered princess. "You loved every single second of it!"
"I am not confirming or denying anything!" Chloe gasped, though her face flushed an even deeper shade of crimson.
Before Chloe could even attempt to defend her royal honor, a soft pop-pop! echoed through the dorm room, followed by two small clouds of sparkling purple smoke.
Both clones blinked, their eyes going wide as their bodies began to shimmer and fade.
"Oh, star-cross me," Clone Two squeaked, looking down at her hands as they turned translucent. "The potion's wearing off!"
"Wait!" Clone One dramatically reached a hand out toward Chloe. "Tell my original copy that I regret nothing!"
"I am right here, you dramatics!" Original Red yelled, crossing her arms.
With one final fizz, both clones dissolved into bright sparks of light, swooping through the air and zip-lining directly back into Red's chest. Red jolted backward, stumbling slightly as two hours' worth of duplicate memories flooded into her brain all at once—including every single second of the clones' passionate, chaotic affection toward Chloe.
Red’s entire face instantly flushed bright red, matching the shade of her hair. She stood there, frozen, staring at Chloe with wide, completely embarrassed eyes.
"Oh... oh wow," Red croaked out, her voice squeaking. "I... I remember everything. I remember... all of it."
Red took a breath, walking over to the edge of the bed and sitting down beside her. She looked up at Chloe, her expression softening into a genuine, sheepish pout.
"I'm so sorry, Princess," Red murmured softly, taking Chloe's hand in hers. "I completely ruined our date. I was supposed to take you out, not unleash two copycat menace versions of myself to knock you out cold."
Chloe’s chest warmed, a soft, fond smile breaking through her flustered expression. "Red, you didn't ruin anything—"
"I don't know, Bluey..." Red interrupted, her soft mood instantly flipping into a mischievous smirk. She reached out, her thumb gently tracing the plump curve of Chloe's mouth. "Looking at you right now... those clones did a serious number on you. Your lips are practically swollen from all those kisses."
Chloe gasped, her face exploding into a brand new wave of heat as she slapped Red's hand away, covering her kiss-swollen lips with her fingers. "Red of Hearts!"
"What?!" Red laughed, leaning in closer with a dangerous, playful glint in her eyes. "I'm just stating facts, Charming! They were totally ruthless with you. Though... I guess that just means I'm gonna have to be extra gentle when I kiss you myself."
Red reached for the hand towel on the nightstand, tenderly wiping away the last lingering streaks of crimson lipstick from Chloe's flushed cheeks.
"Even when my brain is split into three, every single part of me is completely obsessed with you," Red whispered, her tone dropping into something sweet and sincere.
Chloe let out a shaky sigh, her brown eyes darkening with a sudden, feisty resolve. Tossing the towel aside, she reached up, winding her fingers tightly into the collar of Red's jacket, and yanked the real Red of Hearts down into a deep, intense kiss.
Just as Red melted into the rhythm, Chloe caught Red’s lower lip between her teeth, biting down just a little hard—enough to send a sharp, thrilling spike of heat straight through Red's chest.
Red gasped softly into the kiss, her eyes shooting open in shocked delight.
Chloe pulled back just an inch, her swollen lips lingering against Red’s, a teasing, fire-filled smirk playing on her lips as her breath hitched against Red's skin.
"You owe me a real date, Rebel," Chloe purred, her voice low and demanding. "No potions, no duplicates, and no excuses."
Red swallowed hard, her heart pounding violently against her ribs as she stared at the fierce, gorgeous princess hovering over her.
"Deal," Red rasped out, a crooked, hopelessly smitten grin spreading across her face. "Whatever you want, Charming."