Work Text:
~
“Yaoitron where tf are you??”
Mc searches the apartment’s cupboards. Even though that’s stupid cause how tf would yaoitron fit in there. And there Yaoitron was. Hunched up and squished in a cupboard.
”Initiating shyness!,,.! o-o”
Yaoitron buried his face in his knees. Mc sighed.
”What happened now? We got to go to work in like 5 minutes.”
Mc tapped his stickmen foot and Yaoitron whimpered.
”Ok,,,so this might sound pretty #insane.,, but I kindaaaaaaaa don’t wannnaaaaa goooo….s,”
Mc stood there in shock as Yaoitron finally got out of the cupboard. Wtf??? Yaoitron literally loves this job. He’s lowk like….goood at the yaoi stuff? Why did he wanna take a day off from his hobby tf? Mc grabbed Yaoitron and looked straight into his eyes.
”are you…actually yaoitron? Who are you?”
Yaoitron gave out a loud ass cackle.
”HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. I’ know I’m Xx_yaoitron9000xx u silly thang don’t need to remained me teehee XD I just think.p we should go on..,, anether date owo”
Yaoitron clasped his hands(?.?) together and put on the most biggest anime puppy eyes ever. Like genuinely. He was putting emoticoning to the next level. Mc blushed and looked down in embarrassment and flattery. Ever since they actually officially started dating after that whole trauma dump thing Yaoitron did, they hadn’t actually gone on a proper or ACTUAL date in so long. They’ve just been working their ass off at the yaoi maid cafe…where all they did everyday was make out. In fron’t of everyone. For work purposes obvi! Hah!
”I’ll…i’ll call Fedir and see if he’ll allow us to take a vacation…”
Mc covered their red face and picked up their phone. Yaoitron cheered and joyously fell asleep. Just before mc could dial the number, fedir actually called first! Mc picked up the call.
”Hey so um…”
There was a little pause on the phone. However, mc noticed the sound of fire coming through Fedir’s end.
“the uhh cafe lowk caught on fire. Apparently big boss did ts. I dislike him to a certain degree oh my gish. You and Yaoitron don’t need to come today. I’ll deal with this mess cause I’m little man heh..”
”awhshit. I hope your ok.”
”nah everything’s good. Ygs should probably get some rest anyways. See ya in a week probably.”
Just by luck(if we could even call it that idk), the cafe caught on fire! The two lovely gay couple could actually spend their time together! Freakin awesome. Mc looked down at the sleeping yaoitron, who was facing flat down on the bed. Mc laughed. Wasn’t it Yaoitron’s idea to go on a date? And he”s just sleeping like that? Mc shrugged and also got onto the bed, next to yaoitron. And bam, both of them are knocked out.
~
Mc groggily wok up to a yaoitron up in his face. wtf.
”GOOD MORNING SWEATY ^^”
Yaoitron was on top of Mc. Mc was flustered and pushed Yaoitron down as he got up.
”Yeah good morning or whateve….”
Yaoitron heeheed and moonwalked to the kitchen to find himself(and mc) some food.
”What…time is it?”
Mc asked. Yaoitron (from the kitchen) grabbed a bowl and poured milk, lucky charms, and eggs (like the unmixe yolk).
“It’s like 6 am I thik.,”
Mc cheered. This was the lowk like first time they woke up at a reasonable time without having to work. Yaoitron came back inside the room, sat down on the bed next to mc, and showed Mc the weird food combination.
”Let us share so we can hve some romantic tension owo ahsj”
Yaoitron blushed and squirmed around in his spot. It looks like he was waiting for this moment to share food with a loved one. Mc was kinda disgusted about the egg yolk in the milk, but as long as they avoid it it should be fine.
”Ok, lets dig in!”
Mc grabbed one of the spoons Yaoitron had brought(Yaoitron brought like 10 spoons for some reason) and ate some of the lucky charms, successfully avoiding the egg yolk as it’s being devoured by Yaoitron. They surprisingly finished faster than anticipated and there was whatsoever no romantic tension in that time.
”The next time we share food and you want romantic tension, try making spaghetti.”
Mc says to Yaoitron while washing the bowl. Now, they both are in the kitchen. Yaoitron’s sitting down on the counter, dangling his feet while waiting for mc to finish washing the dishes.
”hmm,.., wanna play a game to pas timse?”
”Yeah, sure.”
”ok let’s play guess the organ im describinp.”
“???”
And so, the two played guess the organ I’m describing for the whole morning. It was surprisingly fun and it wasn’t as threatening sounding as mc thought. Ig yaoitron was just bored.
~
”D’you wanna go somewhere for that date you were talking about?”
Mc asked Yaoitron on the couch. They both were drifting off into space. It was now the afternoon, lowk 2pm. Mc looked at Yaoitron’s bright red eyes. It was refreshing to see and it looked like it was reflecting everything. Wow, has mc really looked closely at Yaoitron’s face?
“Hmmm., to be honestly I didn’t rlly plan tgis tgrough.”
Yaoitron’s words stopped as mc caressed Yaoitron’s face. Yaoitron was blushing real hard ooohhh he gotsa crush. Mc had finally realized what he’s doing was gay af (no hate to gays)) and pulled away, however, they both seemed closer on the couch than before.
”uh..um…wanna stay home then? Home date?”
”yegs!!, ! That sounds good.,”
utter silence. Mc looked up at the ceiling as Yaoitron stared intensely at mc. Mc could quite literally feel Yaoitron’s stare cause that’s how intense his staring was. Yaoitron then got up and stood in front of mc, looking down at his face.
”let us coo spaghetti together.”
”what?”
”we are cooking spaghetti. Nowwowowow.”
Yaoitron grabbed mc’s hands (if mc even got hands I don’t remember. He’s a fcking stick figure spare me) and pulled him into the kitchen again.
“O.ok how do we mae spaghetti???”
”um, so first you need like a pan, the noodles and um-“
I actually don’t know how to make spaghetti so pretend mc explained awesome stuff. Yaoitron nodded as suddenly, all those ingredients were in their hands.
“Whoa what the heck? How’d you..?”
“A magician never revel his secrets! Tehe p!”
Yaoitron turned on the stove and they both made spaghetti together awww. During that time, they kept talking about Yaoitron’s exs. Mc couldn’ help but feel a little jelly. Not jelly about the fact they all are dead cause of yaoitron, but jelly that yaoitron had people before mc. I mean, when they first met, they were talking about this and mc didn’t care as much, but now their relationship had lowk hit deeper and their like…official now. It’s a good thing all the biches are dead, now Yaoitron’s all to himself, mc thought.
“Hasah!!!!!!! We finished the spaghetti p!”
”Woah, what time is it? ts actually looks really good. I lowk wanna eat it now.”
Mc looked at the non existent wand on his arm. Wowzers! It was 6 pm! What perfect timing!
”lets…, let’s share nd this time we will have romantic tension…”
Yaoitron quickly placed the plate of spaghetti on the table and grabbed 2 forks all in the speed of light. This boy wants that cookie godam. Anyway, mc stood still and smiled at the sight of yaoitron being freakig excited to possibly get an “accidental” kiss. Mc sat down and they both began eating the spaghetti. However, as they both ate, it seems like they never actually picked the same noodle. And in a blink of an eye, the entire plate was being washed up by mc. There was no romantic tension.
yaoitron was heartbroken and as mc washed the plate, he was crying on the couch.
“AHHHHWHAHSHSHHQHAHHSSHHDGDHSJHSHSHAHHHHAHHAHSHJSSHHHAHAHAHHHWHHWHSHSJSJSJSJWHHHWWJJSKKDKEJEJEJDIJSJ”
That was the sound of despair in real time. Mc quietly laughed a little. Yaoitron didn’t hear it cause he’s so freaking loud ohmydays. After mc was done washing the dishes, yaoitron quickly pulled him on the couch.
”LETS KISS PLSSSSSZZZZ”
Yaoitron cried in Mc’s arms. Mc laughed hard nd played with Yaoitron’s (probably stiff af) hair.
“Yeah yeah, whatever. Heh.”
Mc giggled manly obviously. Yaoitron decided, it was time to lock in. Te two pulled close for a kissy kiss and made out for 4 hours. Wow.
~
Mc woke up the next day(at 1 pm) and saw yaoitron…with a child.
”Yaoitron. Who tf is that.”
Mc pointed at the suspiciously shaped duplicated version of himself but taller. Yaoitron smiled big.
“Tgis is penid, ourson (^O^)”
Mc sat on the bed shocked. wtf. They were both males how’d this even happen. Mpreg? Ew no…right?
”we Didn’t even do it though???”
” Pyegs but we made out 4 4 hours. Tghat counts!”
”no it doesn’t.”
”hello dadas! I am Penid!”
The room was silent. And there stood, in the middle of a cramped room, a penid and yaoitron. Before them was a shocked mc.
“Googoogaagaa.”
Penid sillied.
Abortion, mc and yaoitron thought.