Chapter Text
Lately, Agott had begun paying much closer attention to Coco. It wasn't something she had consciously decided to do; it had simply started happening after so many days of sharing the same space, working together, and learning to recognize even the smallest gestures of the other. Agott already knew exactly what Coco looked like when she was excited, the way her eyes lit up whenever something managed to catch her attention, how she moved her hands while talking whenever she became too enthusiastic, and even the way she tried to hide her frustration when something didn't go as she had hoped. She had also learned to recognize her silences, those moments when Coco said she was fine even though her expression said exactly the opposite.
And lately, there had been far too many of those silences.
Agott didn't know exactly when she had started noticing them, but ignoring them had become increasingly difficult. Coco still laughed, still talked to the others, and still tried to behave as she always did, but something had changed. Her smile no longer seemed to reach her eyes, and although anyone who didn't know her probably wouldn't have noticed, Agott could see it clearly. There was a difference between the smile Coco used to convince everyone that she was fine and the genuine smile that appeared when she was truly happy. The first was little more than a curve of her lips; the second changed her entire face.
Agott missed that second smile.
But what worried her most were Coco's eyes. That particular brightness she had always found in them seemed to have slowly faded, hiding behind a sadness that Coco tried to keep away from other people's eyes. Agott had never considered herself particularly good at reading other people's feelings, but with Coco, it was different. There was something about her that made Agott want to pay attention, even to the things she didn't say.
Perhaps because she cared about her.
Agott frowned slightly at the thought and quickly tried to push it away. She didn't want to dwell on it too much.
Then there was that scar.
Ever since she had seen it during Silver Eve, Agott hadn't been able to stop thinking about it. She had tried not to stare at it too much, knowing that doing so might make Coco uncomfortable, but it was difficult not to wonder what had happened. The mark seemed to tell a story neither of them had ever mentioned and, for some reason, Agott had the feeling that it wasn't a simple one. It wasn't the scar itself that worried her, but what might exist behind it. She had tried to ask Coco about it that very night, but the situation hadn't been right. There had been too many people around, and Coco seemed to be making an enormous effort to act normally.
Agott had decided not to insist.
She didn't want Coco to feel as though she had to explain something simply because Agott wanted to know. If she was ever ready to talk, Agott would listen. Until then, she could wait.
Although waiting didn't mean she had to stop worrying.
Even on the way back to the Atelier, Agott found herself glancing at Coco several times. She wanted to make sure she was all right, even though she knew she probably wouldn't get an honest answer if she asked her directly. It was frustrating. Agott didn't know what to do with the feeling of helplessness that had settled in her chest. She wanted to help her, but she didn't know exactly what she needed help with.
Because even though Coco tried to act as though nothing was happening, Agott could tell.
It still hurt her.
And she wasn't referring only to the scar.
Now that her thoughts had returned to Coco, Agott lifted her gaze slightly and looked at her again. Something else had begun to catch her attention: Coco had been silent for far too long. The Atelier was quiet, accompanied only by the sounds of their tools and the small movements they made while working, but Coco hadn't said a single thing for several minutes. She hadn't even made one of those spontaneous comments she usually made while concentrating.
Agott slowly set down what she was working on.
This wasn't normal.
She turned her head toward Coco, trying to figure out what her companion was doing to remain so quiet. At first, she thought Coco was simply concentrating, but when she looked more closely, she realized that Coco was half-reclined over the desk, her arms tucked beneath her head and her eyes completely closed.
Agott blinked.
"Did she fall asleep...?"
There was no answer.
She let out a small sigh and stood from her place. She approached carefully, making sure not to make too much noise. Maybe Coco was simply tired. After all, lately she didn't seem to be getting enough rest. Agott tried to convince herself that there was nothing to worry about as she leaned slightly over the desk to get a better look at her.
Then she saw her face.
Coco looked completely relaxed in her sleep. The tension that usually accompanied her expressions had disappeared and, for a moment, Agott felt a small sense of relief. She looked peaceful. Maybe that was exactly what she needed: a few minutes in which she didn't have to pretend that everything was fine.
But then she saw it.
A tear slowly rolled down her cheek.
Agott froze.
Then another appeared.
And another.
Her expression immediately changed. All the tranquility she had felt a few seconds earlier vanished, replaced by a concern she didn't know how to handle. She remained silent, watching as the tears traveled down Coco's face, even passing near the scar she had been trying not to stare at too much. For a moment, Agott felt a sharp pang of helplessness.
What could she do?
Maybe she was having a nightmare. Perhaps she was dreaming about her mother. Maybe she was remembering something she preferred to keep buried while awake. Agott couldn't know, and that was precisely what bothered her the most. She couldn't enter Coco's mind and discover what was happening in there.
She couldn't take away whatever was hurting her.
But she could stay.
Finally, Agott sat beside her. She rested her chin on one of her hands and remained there, watching her, trying to find any sign that the nightmare was getting worse. For several seconds, she focused only on Coco's breathing, making sure it remained steady. Little by little, Coco's expression relaxed again, and Agott let out a relieved sigh.
That was when her gaze began to wander across Coco's face.
And eventually settled on her freckles.
Agott didn't know why she started counting them. Maybe she needed a distraction from her worry. Maybe she had simply been watching her for too long. One by one, she followed those little marks scattered across Coco's face, trying not to lose count.
Ten.
Twenty.
Thirty.
Forty...
Forty-three.
Agott fell silent.
Forty-three freckles.
She couldn't help but look at them for a few more seconds. They reminded her of tiny stars scattered across her face, as though someone had decided to draw a small night sky upon Coco's skin. It was a completely ridiculous comparison, but for some reason, Agott found it beautiful.
Far too beautiful.
When she finally realized what she was thinking, she felt her ears and cheeks begin to warm.
She quickly looked away.
What was she doing?
Coco was asleep, possibly trapped in a nightmare, and she was sitting there counting her freckles as if she had nothing better to do. It was ridiculous. An Arklaum would never do something like this, much less her. Agott cleared her throat slightly, trying to regain her composure, and focused on her companion again.
However, the concern returned the moment she saw the tears on Coco's face.
She couldn't simply sit there and watch her.
With some nervousness, Agott raised a hand and gently placed it on Coco's shoulder. She moved it carefully, trying to wake her without frightening her.
"Coco...?" she whispered.
The green-haired girl moved slightly.
Agott went completely still.
She waited a few seconds before calling her again.
"Coco, wake up..."
Finally, Coco's eyes began to open slowly. At first, she looked completely disoriented, as though she still couldn't tell whether she was inside the dream or in the Atelier. She blinked several times until she finally recognized Agott in front of her.
Her expression changed.
A small smile appeared on her face.
Agott felt something strange in her chest when she saw it.
It wasn't the smile she had been seeing over the past few days. It wasn't forced, nor did it seem to be there simply to reassure everyone else. It was a small, tired smile, still heavy with sleep, but genuine.
"Agott...?" Coco murmured.
"Yes. You fell asleep," she replied, trying to keep her voice calm. "It looked like you were having a nightmare."
Coco blinked a couple of times. She seemed to be trying to remember what she had been dreaming about, but the harder she tried, the more confused she looked.
"I don't remember..."
Agott slowly nodded.
"That's okay, you don't have to remember."
Coco looked at her for a few seconds, as though those words had managed to calm her a little. Then she lowered her gaze and fell silent. Agott almost asked her if she was all right, but ultimately held herself back.
She knew that if Coco wanted to talk, she would.
And if she didn't, Agott wasn't going to force her.
Coco closed her eyes again. Agott thought she was simply going to fall asleep over the desk again, but then she saw her slowly move closer to her.
Before Agott could react, Coco ended up resting against her shoulder.
Agott went completely rigid.
Her cheeks immediately began to burn. For a few seconds, she had no idea what to do. Her first instinct was to move away out of sheer surprise, but when she looked down at Coco, she realized that the green-haired girl seemed much calmer.
Her breathing had become slow and steady.
The tears had stopped.
And her expression, for the first time in a long while, looked truly peaceful.
Agott swallowed.
She didn't move.
She could pull away and wake Coco, or she could stay like this. The choice should have been simple, but something kept her from moving. Maybe it was the way Coco had leaned against her with such trust. Maybe it was the peace she had finally found.
Or perhaps she simply didn't want to move away.
Agott lowered her gaze slightly.
"It's okay..." she murmured to herself.
Carefully, she adjusted her posture so Coco could rest more comfortably. Then she looked at her again, and that was when she noticed something else: her lips were quite dry.
Agott frowned.
Yet another thing Coco was neglecting.
It seemed incredible how she could worry about everyone except herself. She was capable of noticing when someone needed help, when someone was tired, or when someone needed company, but when it came to herself, she seemed to completely forget that she had the right to stop as well.
Agott sighed softly.
"You really don't know how to take care of yourself, do you, Coco...?"
She said it quietly, almost as though she were scolding her, although a small smile eventually appeared on her lips.
Coco didn't answer.
She had probably fallen asleep again.
Agott remained by her side for a long while. At first, she didn't know exactly what to do with her hands or where to look, so she simply watched the Atelier. However, every so often she lowered her gaze to make sure Coco was still asleep.
And every time she did, she felt something inside her soften.
There was something strange about seeing her like this.
Coco always seemed to be in motion. She was always talking, always doing something, always trying to help someone. Even when she was sad, she found a way to smile. Seeing her completely still, without that need to pretend she was fine, reminded Agott that underneath all of it, there was still a person who could get tired.
A person who could break, too.
Agott thought about the scar again.
She wondered if Coco ever looked at herself in the mirror and remembered what had happened. She wondered if someone had been there when it happened. She wondered how many times Coco had been forced to pretend that the mark didn't hurt, even when it probably did.
But she didn't want to keep going down that path.
She didn't want to turn her thoughts into assumptions.
So she simply looked at Coco again.
Maybe one day she would tell her.
Maybe one day Agott could ask her about it and hear the story directly from her own lips.
But it didn't have to be that night.
That night, she could simply stay.
Agott gently rested her head against the wall and closed her eyes for a few seconds. The Atelier remained silent and, for the first time since she had begun worrying about Coco, she felt the constant tension inside her slowly begin to fade.
Then Coco moved slightly.
Agott opened her eyes.
The green-haired girl had shifted a little closer to her, unconsciously searching for a more comfortable position.
Agott felt her cheeks grow warm again, but this time she didn't look away or try to move.
"Such a troublesome girl..."
The words came with a small smile.
Coco didn't answer.
She was still asleep.
Agott let out a sigh and, after a few seconds of hesitation, carefully moved a strand of Coco's hair that had fallen across her face. She did it so gently that she barely brushed against her.
"But I guess I don't mind that much."
She immediately regretted saying it, even though no one could hear her.
Agott looked away again, completely embarrassed.
She didn't know what was happening to her.
She didn't know why she cared so much.
She didn't know why she had begun memorizing all those little details about Coco, or why she could tell the difference between a fake smile and a genuine one, or why that scar caused her so much concern, much less why she was now sitting there, letting Coco sleep against her shoulder as though it were the most natural thing in the world.
Maybe she didn't need to know.
For now, it was enough to stay.
Because Agott couldn't change what had happened in the past. She couldn't erase the scar, nor could she tear away the memories that still seemed to haunt Coco. She couldn't promise that Coco would never feel sad again. But she could offer her something much simpler.
Her company.
And if Coco ever woke up from a nightmare, if she ever felt alone again, or if she simply needed somewhere to rest without having to pretend that she was fine, Agott wanted her to know that she could stay by her side.
Even if she could never bring herself to say it directly.
Even if she had to hide it behind small scoldings, sighs, and comments about how poorly Coco took care of herself.
Agott would remain there.
At least for that night, Coco wouldn't have to face alone whatever it was that made her cry even in her sleep.