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It was a rare thing, for Olruggio to be able to sit at the breakfast table. He was usually so busy that he had no choice but to eat at a separate time, or in his own atelier while he worked. But for once, the stars shined on him, and his workload was low (not non-existent, never non-existent, but low), and he got to simply exist with everyone else.
Qifrey was prepping, of course, and it made Olruggio's mouth water. Richeh was right there with him, and Brushbuddy was being kept attached to her shoulder with a vice grip, else he leap straight into the gorgeous smell. Agott was working on spells until the absolute last moment before Qifrey turned around and made her put her wand down to eat (truly, a girl after Olruggio's own workaholic heart). Coco and Tetia were swapping stories, smiling their easy smiles and lighting up a room as they always did.
He was proud of Coco. Not just as a witch, but as a person. She was talking about her days as an Outsider, in her old village, the people she knew, and he knew that weeks ago, this would have been far too painful, to even think about all that she'd had to leave behind. But it was getting easier for her. She'd had the space to grieve, and she was starting to heal a bit. He was so glad for her. And he knew that Qifrey was too.
It was all so idyllic. Until it wasn't.
"And those boys were running as fast as they could, and they ended up taking the shortcut behind Mr Viravi's bakery, and-"
Coco cut herself off mid-story. Her smile froze before a sad little fog fell over her expression, head drooping in a sad kind of discomfort.
Olruggio could tell that Qifrey had noticed immediately, but he didn't turn around quite yet; giving her room to breathe, unless it proved too much.
Tetia frowned and scooted a bit closer to Coco for comfort, but slowly, so she could tell her to back away if she didn't want it.
Coco said nothing. That ... could be good, but could be bad, you never knew with silence.
... Oh lords, there were already enough people in this atelier where an honest conversation felt like pulling teeth, don't say there was another now too ...
"... Are you alright, lass?"
Coco didn't raise her head back up to look at him as he spoke, but still nodded her head just a fraction. Hardly reassuring, but still something, technically.
Unfortunately, him speaking up seemed to attract the attention of Richeh and Agott, putting more eyes on Coco than she was probably comfortable with if she was feeling upset. But ... he couldn't just not check if she was alright, that would be ridiculous.
Still, though, sorry.
"Yeah, I ... I'm fine, Master Olruggio. S-Sorry for killing the mood, Tetia."
Tetia gently laid her hand over Coco's, a soft and silent little 'it's okay, really' that won her a tiny smile in return; her sunlight could be blinding, but it also gave so much warmth in the cold.
"I just ... Mr Viravi ... I just remembered again that he's ..." She smacked her dry lips a little, gulping down what sounded like a stone in her throat. "... he's ... dead now."
... Ah ... poor girl ...
"That's a shame ..." Olruggio could see Tetia's hand squeeze Coco's just a bit more, never enough to hurt but always enough to say 'I'm here for you'. She really was so sweet. "He sounds like a lovely person."
"H-He was. He was always so kind to me and my mom. Whenever sales were low for us and money was tight, he would always sneak me an extra sweet bun, on the house, as long as I promised not to tell anyone." He could see her smile so sadly and his bleeding heart made his damn hands twitch familiarly. "And I never did. Until now, I guess. But ... either way, no more free sweet buns for me, I guess. Not after he was ... executed."
Qifrey stilled at the countertops. Agott's wand twitched against the paper and ruined a draft, but Olruggio found it hard to believe that that was what she cared about, with her eyes widening like that. Even Richeh looked perturbed as Tetia's jaw dropped.
"E- ... E-'Executed'?"
Olruggio had to admit that he was taken off-guard too, although nowhere near as incredulous as Tetia. Coco had made herself so at home here so quickly, fitting in like the atelier was incomplete without her, that sometimes it was easy to forget that she hadn't always been here. That she had lived her entire life until now in a different world to the one they called home.
A different world where execution hadn't long-since been dismissed as barbaric.
"I-I don't know exactly why ..." Coco sniffled, but didn't get quite as far as tears; this was a numb wound, then, but that somehow made it more uncomfortable. "I heard that he and some other people were ... 'conspiring against the Crown' or something ... they were found out, and hanged in the town square for treason ... Mom made sure we stayed out of the town that day ... but I still heard about it ... I cried a lot ... it still feels so ... wrong ..."
"... Bloody Hell, no kidding ..." Olruggio couldn't stop himself from saying it. "I'm ... really sorry you had to go through that." Even if she didn't actually see anything, the idea that she could have just ... soured something in his blood.
Coco smiled, small, wobbly, seemingly relieved and embarrassed in equal measure at the sympathy.
"No-one should have to go through that!"
Tetia was not so gentle; she practically banged the table, Agott quickly grabbing her ink bottle before it shook and spilled, Brushbuddy squeaking and puffing up in shock as he tried to saunter over and offer his own fluffy brand of reassurance.
"Killing someone is just ... unforgivable ... even if it's allowed ... especially if it's allowed, that somehow makes it feel worse ..."
Coco blinked at Tetia as she was sniffling back the beginnings of tears (truly, a girl after Olruggio's own bleeding heart); she looked stunned, which made some kind of sense to him, she obviously knew that this was something terrible but didn't quite realise how bad it looked from an outside perspective, but she also looked oddly ... confused.
... What could possibly be confusing about this?
"I ... um ... thank you, really ... but ... I don't ... really know why you're getting this upset about this ..."
... Olruggio felt his eyes narrow.
Eh?
"I mean ... it sucks, definitely, but ... it's nothing that crazy, right?"
She was being completely sincere, he could tell, but that just left him (and apparently everyone else) more baffled.
"What do you mean?! It is crazy to us, witches don't do executions, it's murder, legal murder, it's obscene and disgusting and-"
"But ... yes you do."
Tetia went silent. The whole table did. You could hear a pin drop.
"N-Not you you, I don't mean you specifically, obviously, b-but ... I just mean ... u-um ..." She was floundering, clearly feeling like she was on unstable footing, fidgeting with her hands and looking down as her face turned simultaneously red with embarrassment and pale with discomfort. "I mean ... that's what memory erasure magic is, right? M-Master Qifrey said himself that a person's memories, who they are, that's ... them. Not their bodies, but ... their minds. So ... even if it is to maintain the Pact, like it's meant for, like it's legal to do ... getting rid of someone's memories ... even just a little bit ... it 'kills' that version of that person. And ... it's not just limited to 'a little'. Witches can take a lot. And if you take enough, then ... even if the person's body is still alive, the person themselves, as they were, really is just ... dead. The witch would have ... killed them. In all the ways that matter ..."
... That was ... uncomfortable. Olruggio could see it on everyone's faces, they were all uncomfortable to think about it in that way.
... Well. He could see it on most of their faces. The one he was most concerned with listening to this was still turned away, semi-strategically, and all Olruggio could do was try to judge his feelings from the shape of his back.
Tread carefully, Coco. Please. You don't know how raw of a nerve you're striking.
She'd gotten quieter and quieter as she went on, tone sounding more and more like a question as she shrunk into herself at the table, the atmosphere abruptly alien and oppressive.
"... Or, did ... did I get that wrong? Did I ... say something stupid again?"
"... Not in the slightest."
Olruggio felt a shiver down his spine at Qifrey's tone.
Calm. Comforting. Controlled. Deliberately so. Painfully so.
She had struck a nerve with that, then. How could she not have?
He knew that Qifrey was happy with his life now. He at least hoped that Qifrey was happy with his life now, damnit. But ... he wasn't a fool. He knew he at least had to be curious, sometimes, at what kind of life he'd lived in the gaping maw that existed before Thristas.
(It must be a nightmare, feeling like a ghost inside your own skin.)
Despite all of that, though, Qifrey turned around with breakfast plated, smiling as bright and warm as ever.
To an untrained eye, at least. Olruggio could see his smile stretched thin, brittle enough to verge on breaking, before it hardened into something solemn, careful to not intimidate but desperate to portray the seriousness of the moment.
"In fact ... I would ask all of you girls to keep Coco's words in mind whenever you have to consider using memory magic in the future. It, even more than any other kind of magic we can use, is not a toy. It's something unfortunately necessary, but terrible. Improper use of it, abuse of it, is-"
He stumbled in his words.
... Qifrey ... stumbled.
... Stars, this was serious to him ... of course it was, but still ... Olruggio felt himself give Qifrey a look of sympathy.
Not that he acknowledged it. Qifrey seemed to be refusing to look at him right now.
"... it's unforgivable ..."
But he was also refusing to look at anyone else, as those words were carved out of him. So ... it was fine. Probably.
Hopefully.
Centuries passed in that crushing silence before Qifrey slapped his classic mask back on his face tight enough to draw blood, a practiced ease to it that made Olruggio sick every time.
"Enough of that, though. Discussions of philosophy and morality can occur off the breakfast table. As well as work, Agott~"
Agott was snapped out of her reverie and put her wand and paper away with a softer-than-usual grumble. Qifrey set the plates down, and within seconds of digging in, the dark cloud over the atelier was dismissed as if nothing had happened at all.
That was Qifrey's true magic, Olruggio imagined. But ... it hardly came without a cost. The smile was still torn and forced. Something still wasn't right.
... Some things hadn't been right in a long time. Olruggio wanted nothing more than to help, but ... it was hard, and it hurt, when Qifrey didn't trust him enough to let him in.
You can talk to me. About anything. Like you used to. I know you won't, but ... you can ...
(Qifrey didn't look at anyone else for the rest of breakfast, as purposefully unreadable as always, his walls far too high to climb. But Olruggio still took it upon himself to get the shopping today, even though he should probably be going back to work. And if he noticed that ingredients for sweet buns had been added to the shopping list, then he very tactfully said nothing at all.)