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Eddie didn’t believe in signs of the universe. But he was really starting to think the universe hated him
Eddie hadn’t heard from his husband in six months and hadn’t seen him in person since two years ago. He had no idea where Buck was or if he was even alive. Their son still woke up crying for his Papa and Eddie could only hold him and tell him that Papa would be home soon. On top of that, the only person at the station who knew he was married was Bobby because it was on his paperwork and his sister-in-law, who has no idea he’s married to her brother, is at the station because apparently she’s dating Chimney.
But it couldn’t possibly get worse.
Except, it did.
“Hey, Diaz! Someone’s here for you!” Williams called from down below. Eddie looked up, his eyebrows scrunching together. He went to the railing to see who was there and his heart dropped. No. No. NO! There was a man in Navy fatigues, standing at attention. He slid down the pole, his whole body feeling numb as he did. His walk was slow, like the bad news wouldn’t be there if he took as long as possible. “Edmundo Diaz?” The man asked and Eddie nodded slowly.
“Lieutenant Commander Evan ‘Buck’ Diaz has missed his last three check-ins. He is now classified as MIA. We will let you…” Eddie was sure there was more the man was saying but the ringing in his ears was too loud for him to hear. His chest felt tight. Buck was MIA. Buck was missing. “Did you know between 90% and nearly 100% of MIA personnel become considered dead and they stop looking?” Buck said one night after they found out he was being deployed again.
Eddie felt tears run down his face and his back hit something. His breaths were coming fast and he was sure he let out some type of noise but he wasn’t sure. His husband was missing. The same husband that told him the likelihood of MIA becoming considered KIA. When he opened his eyes, he realized someone was hugging him. He looked up slightly, realizing it was Bobby and he just sank farther into his arms. “I-I hadn’t hea—heard from him s-s-since Christmas.” He sobbed, clinging to Bobby as he cried.
“Wh—What am I supposed t-to tell Chris…?” Chris had already lost his mom a few months ago. How was he supposed to tell him that his Papa may never come home? Something in his heart shattered and he sobbed loudly, crumpling to the floor and leaning against the fire truck.
His husband was as good as gone.
And there was nothing he could do.
…
It had been seven months. Seven months of waking up and wondering if he was going to get news about his husband only to be let down over and over again. The Navy had delivered a flag to him but he refused to have a funeral until he had proof. He wasn’t putting Christopher (or himself) through that if there was even a small chance that Buck would come back.
He had work today. Bobby had let him take off for a few weeks after he found out. Something that he greatly appreciated. He had thought about telling Maddie who he was. But how could he put her through that when she didn’t even know Eddie as her brother-in-law. Eddie knew that Buck had stopped sending post cards a few months after they started dating.
Eddie had been quieter than normal since the flag was brought to his house and he was told that the Navy would help with any and all funeral costs when he was ready. Eddie hadn’t been ready yet. He didn’t know if he would ever be ready. “Eddie! Get down here! There’s someone here for you!” Hen yelled from the bay. Eddie was up and out of his chair before he even fully realized. Maybe he was finally getting news that his husband was alive. Maybe he was finally going to get the closure he needed. Maybe—
“Buck…” His voice came out a whisper as he stared at the man. Buck looked, in short, horrible. But he was alive and breathing. His curly hair was a mess and he had a new scar across his left eye that just missed his nose and went through his top lip. He was wearing a leg brace but he didn’t have any crutches with him. That’s all Eddie could really see because of the fatigues he was wearing. “Eddie…” Buck finally said, opening his arms.
Eddie couldn’t stop himself from launching himself at his husband, wrapping his arms around him as he cried into his chest. Buck made an ‘oof!’ sound when he caught Eddie, somehow managing to keep them both upright. “Hey, baby.” Buck whispered, burying his face in Eddie’s hair. Buck had been a POW for nine of the thirteen months that had passed since he last spoke to Eddie. He had been captured at the end of January if he remembered correctly and wasn’t saved until October.
It is February now.
Look, Buck wanted to tell Eddie months ago but he couldn’t. He couldn’t even talk until a few weeks ago. His first word had been Eddie, in a scratchy voice that he hadn’t used since a few weeks after he had been captured. “I thought…” Eddie’s voice trailed off, a few tears still falling down his face. Buck nodded slowly. “I know, Eds. But I’m alive. A few new scars and probably some chronic aches, but I’m alive.” He promised, leaning down to press a kiss to Eddie’s forehead.
Eddie smiled softly, looking up at Buck like his husband was the one responsible for hanging the sun, the moon, and the stars. “Dios…You’re alive.” He murmured, his hands coming up to cup Buck’s face. “You’re here.” He whispered, his thumb running over the new scar. Buck smiled and nodded. “Here for good, too.” He said softly, reveling in the smile that spread across Eddie’s face when he said that. Eddie leaned up, pressing his lips to Buck’s in a soft kiss. Three years. It had been three years since he was able to kiss his husband. In that time he had went to the fire academy in El Paso, moved to L.A. so Chris could be closer to his mom and Eddie closer to his Aubela and Tía, joined the 118, lost Shannon, come to terms with the fact he may never see his husband again, and became a fully fledged firefighter.
And Buck was here!
Buck was alive. His husband was alive. He was in that small percentage of MIA personnel to be found alive. Eddie never wanted to let go of Buck again. A sob suddenly fell from his lips as he clung to Buck, the fabric of the fatigues balled up in his hands. Tears were flowing down his face and he could feel Buck’s arms tighten around him. “I know, baby. I know.” He heard Buck murmuring, one of his hands coming up to run through Eddie’s gelled hair. “I’m here.” Buck mumbled, his own eyes closing as he held his sobbing husband in his arms.
After a few minutes, Eddie finally pulled back, his hands coming to Buck’s face. His thumb ran over the new scar and he hoped whoever gave that to his husband was good and dead. Dead by a slow, painful death. Look, Eddie wasn’t big on violence. Especially now that, for the past year and a month, the only person that Eddie knew Chris had was Eddie himself. But he hoped whoever made his husband suffer or helped in making his husband suffer had died a slow, painful death. Something bloody and so close to torture that it may not have been fully humane.
The things you did, or thought, for the person you loved most was always surprising.
“I love you.” Eddie heard himself saying, his thumb still trailing over the scar. “And you’re so beautiful, cariño.”
A tear fell down Buck’s cheek as he smiled. “I love you too, Eds.” He murmured, his own hands still resting on Eddie’s waist. Their position vaguely reminded him of their first dance at their wedding. It had been a small wedding. Eddie’s sisters, aubela, and tía. Shannon and Chris. Buck’s SEAL team. It was small but it was perfect.
Finally, drawn out of their thoughts by the clearing of a throat, Eddie and Buck’s twin gazes broke and Eddie turned, his hand going down to grab Buck’s, to his team who had made their way to them. “Buck, this is my team. That’s Captain Nash, or Bobby as he insists we call him. That’s Hen, she’s one of our paramedics. That’s Chimney, our head paramedic and lieutenant. Then that’s Ravi. He’s my partner out in the field and our new probie.” Eddie introduced, pointing out each of the firefighters as he said their name. “Guys, this is my husband. Lieutenant Commander Evan Diaz. But he likes to be called Buck.”
Buck only let go of Eddie’s hand to step forward and shake everyone’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you all. Thank you for putting up with my stubborn husband this long.” His voice held a teasing tone as he shook everyone’s hands. Hen laughed and nodded. “He’s not too stubborn. Only sometimes. It’s nice to meet you, Buck.” She replied. Buck snorted and turned back toward Eddie, a hand on his own chest, obviously about to say something before his eyes zeroed in on someone behind Eddie.
In the chaos of introductions, no one had heard the bay door open.
Buck was staring at Maddie and Maddie was staring at him. There was a look of surprise on both of their faces. “Maddie…?” Buck’s voice came out choked, tears brimming in his eyes. He couldn’t remember the last time he heard from his sister. Much less seen her. But she still looked just like she did the day she left him in Hershey for Boston. Even if a little older.
“Evan.” Maddie’s voice came out as a breath more than anything. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion as they got closer to each other, like magnets that had been separated for years, their arms wrapping around one another once they crashed into each other. He could hear someone making noises of confusion and he could still feel Eddie’s solid presence beside him and Maddie.
“Oh, Ev. God, you’ve gotten so big, little brother.” The nickname only Maddie had used for him until he met Eddie, who he didn’t mind hearing call him his given name, cracked something down the middle of his chest as he held his sister in his arms. “I missed you, Mads.” Buck whispered, breathing in the smell of her shampoo.
He was suddenly painfully reminded of Doug. Doug, who was responsible for taking his sister away from him. Doug, who he knew was hurting Maddie but he could never get her to admit it. Doug, who was a horrible person that deserved whatever Hell would offer him when he was finally dead. Buck jerked away from Maddie like he was burned, his eyes darting around the firehouse for any signs of his sister's husband. “Where the fuck is he?” His voice came out steady, even with all the emotions coursing through him.
Maddie smiled sadly at him, tilting her head ever so slightly. Something that was purely Buckley. “He’s dead, Evan.” She replied, making something inside Buck relax. But then she was talking again. “He was going to kill me. He kidnapped me, stabbed Chimney, and took me to Big Bear. I refused to cooperate. So, he was going to kill me. I got him first.” Her voice came out shaky and it made Buck frown. He reached forward to soothe his sister, pulling her back into his arms.
“I’m so proud of you.” He murmured, holding her. He glanced over at Eddie, raising a brow. Eddie shook his head, as if to say later. Buck gave a small nod before his attention returned to Maddie. They stayed like that for a few minutes until both him and Maddie were calmed down. The silence was only broken by Bobby clapping his hands together once.
“Anyone hungry? Dinner should be done by now.”