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Olruggio fell back on his chair with a heavy sigh. He dropped his pen from his hand that now painfully cramped from the grip he maintained on it for the past couple hours, staring at his ink riddled desk. The wood was littered with stationary and crumpled up parchment each etched with failed spells on its surface, but Olruggio admired the final product that sat in its center.
It took a week of missed meals and sleepless nights, but he managed to finish brainstorming the casting seal required for his recent client’s request. It was always the noblemen that somehow fantasized about the most outrageous of spells that they wanted Olruggio to fashion, but who was he to deny them of his inventions once he saw how much they were willing to pay? Qifrey would probably scold him if he admitted that out loud, fussing over him prioritizing deadlines rather than his health, but someone had to cover the costs of raising four apprentices!
Olruggio’s back sharply tensed the moment he rose from his desk, triggering every joint in his body to crack in a loud, humbling way. He turned red at his own unathleticism, glad that none of the girls were around to make fun of him. The girls voices rang in his head,
“Master Olruggio never leaves the house!”
“Master Olly, are you older than Master Qifrey?”
“Master Olly, you’re shorter than Master Qifrey!”
Olruggio groaned. He relaxed his shoulders down in his irreversible hunched stance before shuffling over to his bed that he had desperately missed. He rubbed his droopy eyes that ached for rest, collapsing onto the wool blankets that laid mismatched on his bed, with no energy to even tuck himself in. He wanted nothing more than to doze off in the comfort of his room, putting the stress he carried throughout the week behind him.
That was, at least, until he heard noises echoing from outside his door.
Olruggio squinted his eyes shut, praying that these voices would die out if he ignored them.
But despite his hopes, the loud chatter that came from the hallway only grew louder the longer he didn’t answer, with Tetia’s voice echoing, “Master Olly!” In a harsh whisper accompanied by knocking.
Jinxed myself.
Olruggio groaned like a child, digging his fingers through his hair. He couldn’t bear the chatter anymore, abruptly standing up too fast than he should’ve. He was seeing stars as he fumbled down the staircase to the door, cursing under his breath clutching onto its wooden handle. He slowly opened the creaky entrance to reveal the four lively apprentices at his doorstep, whispering amongst one another in between their giggles. Once they saw him though, they quickly straightened up.
Olruggio gave them a deadpan look.
“You girls know what time it is?” His fingers massaged his temple.
“Good evening, Master Olly!” Coco raised her eyebrows with an unnerving look, visibly startled by his zombie-like appearance.
“Don’t ‘good evening’ me!” He whispered, rubbing the bridge of his nose, “Does Qifrey know you’re awake?”
“No, we made sure he was asleep before we came.” Richeh said, a fearful sparkle gleaming in her eyes that did not reassure Olruggio.
“I told them we shouldn’t be here.” Agott corrected.
“Yes, listen to Ag–”
“And should’ve gone to Master Qifrey instead.” She finished.
Olruggio furrowed his eyebrows. “What? What business do you have with either of us at this hour?!”
“We came to ask you a question!” Tetia gave him a toothy grin, almost blinding him with her excitement.
“You had to come by this late in the night for a mere question?” Olruggio leaned against the doorframe.
“We really wanted to know the answer!” Coco cried, scooting closer to the door in an obvious attempt to barge in.
“Ack!” Olruggio yelped, “Don’t look at me like that! You shouldn’t be awake this late at your age!”
“Just one question Master Olly, pleaseeee!” Tetia whined, clapping her hands together as she pleaded alongside the other girls who mimicked her.
Sweat beaded down his face as he grimaced at them, but he knew there was no fighting them when they really wanted something; heaven knows Qifrey has tried.
“... Alright, fine!” Olruggio conceded, setting off a round of cheers from the apprentices before he added, “But just one question, and then it’s straight to bed!”
“You won’t regret this, Master Olly.” Richeh proclaimed, making Olruggio’s skin crawl with worry as he opened the door for the girls to skip inside.
Olruggio impatiently slammed the door shut, “Go on, ask” He crossed his arms.
“Well, um…How do we say this…” Coco mumbled, her pleading eyes looking to Tetia to speak on their behalf.
“Well, Master Olruggio, we were just discussing something in our room…” Tetia brought her fingernails to her teeth and nervously bit down. Goodness, what kind of question were they about to ask?
Olruggio shut his eyes, frustrated, “Girls, can you spit it out?”
“Fine, I’ll do it: are you and Master Qifrey married?” Agott announced, causing four sets of hopeful eyes to lock onto Olruggio.
Olruggio’s heart forgot how to function.
“What?!” He exclaimed, warmth prickling at his cheeks.
“You and Master Qifrey are very close.” Richeh said.
“Yeah! You’ve known each other for a long time too!” Tetia added.
“N-none of that means anything! Where could you possibly come up with these fantasies?” Olruggio stammered.
“You live together, cook for each other, clean together, stay up late…” Coco counted each instance with her fingers like they all had been keeping track.
Agott hid her flustered cheeks behind her cloak. “It is quite obvious Master Olruggio.”
“Girls, I-” Olruggio was at a loss for words. “The ‘nature’ of Qifrey and I’s relationship is frankly none of your business, now is it?”
“So you’re not denying it?” Richeh pressed.
“Yes, I am.” He frowned.
“I told you they were involved.” She turned to the others, ignoring Olruggio’s protests.
“He is really red…” Coco watched Olruggio’s face intently, making him wrinkle his nose.
“We are not ‘involved.’” Olruggio’s tone grew increasingly irritated. “So there’s nothing left to debate over: go to bed.”
“Well if you’re not married, then do you want to be?” Agott asked, earning cheeky grins from the other girls like they were thanking her for asking such a genius question.
“Do you love Master Qifrey?” Tetia’s eyes glimmered.
The girls’ question caught him off guard as he gaped at them, “I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but I’m done answering questions. Leave!”
“We aren’t judging, Master Olly! We just want to know!” Coco reassured him.
“And you already know too much,” he sternly replied, reopening his door for them to exit.
“So we are right.” Richeh refused to budge, “Admit you love Master Qifrey.”
“You’re not setting a good example for your apprentices by lying, Master Olly,” Agott said, and Olruggio wanted to pull at his hair.
Dumbfounded, he scratched his scalp instead, “I don’t even know what to tell you, girls. I really wish you would’ve pestered Qifrey with this one.”
“Master Olly, can I give you some advice?” Coco timidly chimed in.
“None of you hesitated in bombarding me with questions, so I don’t see why not,” he grumbled.
“You should tell Master Qifrey how you feel!” She grinned innocently. “I’m sure he won’t hold it against you!”
His expression softened.
How could he explain what twenty years of waiting felt like to a group of children?
He didn’t know how to tell them that he wanted more than anything to ask Qifrey these questions, to get down on one knee and ask him to be his even though his heart already belonged to him for all these years. They had no idea how desperately he yearned to let the emotions and thoughts he’s had to bottle up, spill into Qifrey through a kiss that melted their two beings into one. They couldn’t fathom the amount of times he had to blame the wine when he confessed to Qifrey how he felt, to face rejection every single time he tried to kiss him. How could they understand the feeling of being draped against Qifrey as he sipped from his loop chalice? Or the feeling of their faces so close enough to delicately brush each other yet neither of them daring to move. Or to feel the gentle touch of Qifrey’s fingers on his forehead that moved his bangs out of the way when he thought Olruggio was passed out?
To have not even sleep give him the kind of peace Qifrey provided?
They could never comprehend the amount of times he imagined Qifrey was in this very room with him. He despised the longing that pierced his chest as his thoughts conjured images of Qifrey laying beside him, tangled in his sheets or held in his arms. They were selfish thoughts, Olruggio knew that. He was supposed to be content. He was content. He loved living in this atelier with his dear friend and among the bright, young girls who stood in front of him now.
He was happy.
But the girls had to remind him of the thoughts he hoped to keep locked away, reminding him of what he couldn’t have. These were things he could never share with them and they could never hope to understand, even if they meant no harm.
“Alright, if that’s all then you can go now,” Olruggio sighed, gesturing out his door. “And ask your teacher these kinds of questions next time. And all questions, in general.”
“Coward’s move.” Richeh puffed, and the other girls giggled like he was the butt of their inside jokes.
Thankfully, it didn’t take long before the girls finally decided to take their leave. As they filed past Olruggio, exchanging their good nights with him, he felt their gazes linger on him with pity. Tetia gave Coco a whisper that he couldn’t discern, but it made her run back into the room while the others left.
“Sorry Master Olruggio, I didn’t mean to upset you.” She fidgeted with her pajama’s lace that hung off its edges, “But we wish you good luck with Master Qifrey.”
Olruggio felt a twinge of guilt now that he kicked them out, resolving to awkwardly pet Coco on the head, “Uh, it’s okay. I know you mean well.”
Coco smiled up at him, “And! I think Master Qifrey cares for you too!” She burst with her cheeks a deep red, before scurrying after the rest of the group and leaving Olruggio alone in his room again.
He quietly closed the door and fell to the ground against it.
₊˚.༄
“May I come up?” Qifrey called from the foot of Olruggio's staircase, carrying liquor and two loop chalices in his arms.
Olruggio cracked a smile from his desk. “You already let yourself in, don’t see why not.”
Qifrey climbed up the steps to find Olruggio still slouching over his work. “Can your invention spare a break? Or will I have to enjoy this wine myself?”
“Well, I can’t let good wine go to waste.” Olruggio stood from his chair with a groan, earning a giggle from Qifrey.
“You need to look after yourself more.” He said, popping open the bottle. “I still need my Watchful Eye.”
“This is me looking after myself.” Olruggio chuckled as he took a chalice from Qifrey’s hand.
Qifrey poured his own glass and raised it in front of him. “To your newest project.”
Olruggio laughed as they clinked the rims of their drinks together. As much as he wanted to savor the moment they shared now, Coco’s words echoed in his thoughts. Dammit, it was always something with that child!
Qifrey’s eyes followed Olruggio as he drank from his chalice, studying his face. “You’re tense.”
“I’m not tense.” He protested. He rolled his shoulders back and set the empty chalice on his desk.
“But something is on your mind.” Qifrey raised an eyebrow, copying after him.
Olruggio clicked his tongue before slumping onto his bed. “You sound so sure of yourself,” he scoffed, now lying his back against its warm covers.
“I’ve known you for so long, Olly.” Qifrey followed and rested his fluffy hair down that brushed against Olruggio. “I know when something’s wrong.”
Olruggio held his gaze for a moment, wanting to get lost in those deep pools of blue. But instead, he sighed. “Last night, the girls decided to visit my room.”
“The girls?” Qifrey furrowed his brow. “Why did they trouble you?”
Olruggio let out a light chuckle as he looked over his shoulder to Qifrey. “They told me that they waited until you were asleep.”
Qifrey scoffed. “While I’m glad they feel so comfortable with you, they must sleep! I’ll go check on them now–” He rose from the bed, but Olruggio wasn’t finished, sitting up to grasp Qifrey’s wrist and pull him back down.
“There’s…more.” He muttered, only gaining a more concerned look from Qifrey who descended to sit beside him. He silently stared at Olruggio, waiting for him to elaborate and occasionally glancing to his wrist.
“They wanted to ask me something. Well, Agott said she wanted to ask you but the girls came to me so I had to respond instead…” Olruggio sputtered; Qifrey knit his brow, “Um, you know what, it’s not a big deal. I shouldn’t have brought it up, it’s a little awkward–”
“What?” Qifrey asked with worry written all over his expression.
Olruggio didn’t like that one bit.
He gulped.
“They asked if we were married.”
Qifrey froze.
“Oh.”
Olruggio’s heart pounded harder against his chest as if it was trying to escape from his ribs, his palm only pressing harder around Qifrey’s wrist.
“My goodness!” He superficially laughed, “They really asked you that?”
“They said we acted too domestic not to be.” Olruggio forced a smiled.
“My, their imaginations surely are active!” Qifrey rubbed the nape of his neck, his sharp eyes staring down at the floor to avoid looking at Olruggio.
Olruggio dully laughed. “Way too active.”
Silence fell between them.
Qifrey’s eyes hesitantly trailed back up to meet Olruggio, “What did you tell them?”
“What should I have told them?” He tightened his grip around his wrist.
Qifrey’s smile faded as Olruggio stared so intently at him, so full of the pain and want he’s had to swallow back down all these years.
Sweat beaded down Qifrey’s cheek. “If that was all, then I–”
“Was their question that outlandish?” Olruggio asked, lungs burning like he was running out of air.
Qifrey broke their eye contact. “You’re tired, I should go.”
“Go where, Qifrey? Go lock yourself in your room and avoid me?” Olruggio’s voice stung with desperation. “Again?”
“Olly… don’t.” His voice quivered.
“Don’t what, Qifrey?” He snorted. “Don’t acknowledge the obvious that even the girls notice?”
“Olruggio, you don’t want this.” Qifrey shook him off, wrapping his arms around himself in that defensive pose he always did as a child.
“That’s all I’ve been wanting, Qifrey.” He mumbled. “You know that.”
“You don’t want to marry me!” Qifrey spat out. “You shouldn’t!”
“How can you say that?” Olruggio tugged onto Qifrey’s arm again, “There’s nothing more I want than to marry you. To hold you. To kiss you.” His eyes sparkled against the faint glow of the candlelight, dropping down to Qifrey’s lips.
“I–”
“Don’t say it, Olruggio.”
“I love you,” Olruggio’s eyes pleaded just as much as his words, “You never want me to admit it, but I can’t help myself.”
Qifrey’s shoulders raised up in anger and he pushed his palms against Olruggio’s chest. “Well, I don’t! I don’t love you.” He cried out.
“You think in all the time I’ve known you, I can’t tell when something’s wrong with you too?” Olruggio let go of him. “That I can’t notice when you lie to me?”
Qifrey bit down on his lip.
“I know you’re hiding something from me Qifrey, I’m not stupid.” He let the words fall from his lips. “But it doesn’t matter to me. I still love you.”
“You wouldn’t say that if you knew.” Qifrey looked at him tearfully. “If you knew what I’ve done.”
“Well you don’t get to decide that, do you?” Olruggio gently placed his hand on Qifrey’s thigh. “But I’m sure nothing you tell me would make me stop loving you.”
Qifrey’s eye shakily darted between Olruggio’s, like he was deep in thought trying to decide if he should let his guard down or not. He reached for his pocket, pulling out a piece of parchment that he unfolded. “That’s the problem, my love.”
Olruggio’s eye fell down to the paper, “What is that?”
“I’m sorry, Olly.” Qifrey attempted to caress his face, but Olruggio leaned back.
“Qifrey, what spell is that?” He demanded, and tears that began to slowly form in Qifrey’s eye made him falter. He couldn’t see much in the dim lighting, but the paper shown just translucent enough for him to make out the spiraling circles drawn upon it. To recognize the unfortunately familiar thick lines that darkened the page.
“Is that what I think it is?”
Qifrey leaned in and hastily pressed his lips against Olruggio’s mouth, intertwining them in a kiss that Olruggio wanted to release himself to so badly. Instead he shoved Qifrey off of him. “Don’t bullshit me! Are you trying to wipe my memories?”
Qifrey fought back against Olruggio’s strength until Olruggio was forced flat on his back. “Olly…I do love you. I love you more than you could ever know.”
“Ever know? Or what you will let me know?” Olruggio restrained his arm that held the erasure spell above him. “Is this even the first time you…”
“Forgive me.” He brushed Olruggio’s hair out of his face as he always did. A tiny branch seeped through the strands of Qifrey’s hair as he smiled. “I’d leave you with one last kiss, but I don’t know if I’ll last for that long.”
Olruggio’s expression hardened once he saw the silverwood grow above him. “Qifrey!” He shouted.
But the spell was already held against his forehead before he could react, making him immediately feel his consciousness slip from him. Still, his eyes never left Qifrey’s anguished face that now spilled tears down his cheek, apologizing to him until he fell asleep on his lap. Qifrey shakily bent down, holding Olruggio’s limp body tight to his chest for the millionth time as he sobbed into his hair.
“One day, my star” He whispered, planting a kiss on top of his head.