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I'm having a dream.
I can't say with certainty how I know it's a dream, but I'm sure of it — this is a dream.
The sky is a color caught between sunset and dawn. Clouds run in golden ribbons. When the wind blows, the edges of the world ripple like the surface of water, and particles of gold drift through the air like fireflies.
Within that, there is a single living presence before me. Careless dark bay hair. A tattered yellow jacket. A turquoise ornament in her hair. And twilight-colored eyes that draw in everyone who meets them.
The moment our eyes meet, the girl smiles. As if she knew from the start that I would come here. Drawn by that smile, I take a step forward. Or perhaps I was made to. The girl says nothing — but there is a power in her gaze that guides. When I try to look away, she tilts her head ever so slightly. And that alone makes me feel as if she's said: "It's alright."
Before I realize it, I've walked right up to her. She narrows her eyes with satisfaction, then unhesitatingly takes my right hand. With a gentle touch she lifts the back of my hand, wrapping her fingers around it, and draws me lightly closer. The graceful, practiced movement — as if this has been repeated countless times before — gives me no time to feel embarrassed.
"……"
The girl says nothing. Only holds our joined hands and slowly, slowly closes the distance between us. There's no feeling of pressure, no blocked escape — yet somehow the option of stepping backward has simply vanished from my mind.
I find that our breath now reaches each other. I can almost hear the sound of her heartbeat and mine crossing. She seems pleased by my hesitation, narrowing her eyes in satisfaction — and then the hand that had been free slides gently around my waist. Not a moment's wavering in the motion. As if this were perfectly natural, a habit worn smooth. While I tremble in surprise, the girl draws my waist toward her with gentle force.
The world tilted one step in her direction.
"W-wait……"
I try instinctively to pull back. At the last moment before our lips touch, I press my hand against her shoulder by reflex and push back. This I cannot allow, no matter what — because we are in a certain relationship, and even if heaven and earth were turned upside down, the sort of relationship that involves kissing is not——
"……Mm? What am I… right now……"
"……"
That was the moment. The girl slipped her fingers around my wrist and lifted my hand.
Her sleepy-looking eyes curved with mischief — and dropped to look at my fingertips with amusement.
"——!"
Soft lips pressed gently to the back of my hand. A kiss as light as a feather landing — just a single instant. That was all. That was all it should have been. But the arm that had been pushing back went slack. Surprise and bewilderment collided, and all I could do was stare back at her.
The girl watched my reaction, and smiled with satisfaction. As if she had known all along it would go this way. And then she put her weight into the arm around my waist once more. I forgot to resist and let my body fall against hers. The girl brought her face close, slowly. Twilight-colored eyes, right there before me. In those eyes, no golden meadow, no evening sky. What was reflected was only me — foolish and wanting and waiting for it.
Without words, her gaze alone conveyed more than enough. Foreheads nearly brushing, the tips of our noses just barely grazing each other. I held my breath. Even that small sound, in the quiet of the dream, felt unbearably loud.
The girl closed her eyes quietly.
And with a movement gentler than petals falling on a shoulder, toward my lips——————
"———So then, to let off steam, you've been obsessively searching for a partner on a dating app. Is that what you're telling me?"
"……Exactly (that is precisely correct)……"
I sat seiza on the floor and bowed deeply. The picture I made was so like a student called in to see a teacher that I wasn't sure which of us was supposed to be the adult here.
For her part, Stay Gold had settled herself into the swivel chair with my smartphone in one hand, and was looking at it with weary exasperation.
"……I'll ask, even though I'm almost afraid to. How did it come to this?"
"There are… deep reasons for that…"
I cleared my throat, and opened my mouth to explain the logic that had led to all this. (Also known as: making excuses.)
It had started with a strange dream I'd been having repeatedly over the past several nights. Every night when I fell asleep, the same girl appeared. Dark bay hair. A worn yellow jacket. A hair ornament with a blue stone. A beautiful Uma Musume with eyes that held twilight itself inside them.
By this point you will probably understand: that figure was unmistakably my assigned Uma Musume, Stay Gold. The dream version of her never spoke a word. She only smiled, took my hand, and escorted me with hands that moved as if they knew exactly what they were doing. The composure was strangely convincing — even knowing it was a dream, I was led around effortlessly every time.
And to make matters worse, the dream hadn't ended after one night. One night, two nights, three nights — before I knew it, I'd had the same dream nearly every night for a week.
At first I thought it was fatigue from work. Stress, I told myself. But the content was too consistent. Every night my beloved partner would appear in my dreams, every night she'd rattle my composure in the exact same way, and I'd wake up having exchanged a kiss with her in the dream.
And even that might have been manageable, but the real problem was that even while awake, I couldn't stop thinking about the dream. I was embarrassed at myself — not quite the budding maiden — but that was the reality. Letting dreams get in the way of work was completely out of the question. Absolutely not.
So I thought about it seriously. As seriously as I have ever thought about anything. And after thinking and thinking, I arrived at a single hypothesis.
— Could it be that this is happening because certain romantic needs are going unmet?
In retrospect, that is quite a leap in logic. But the me of that time, who had been at the mercy of these dreams for days, was perfectly sincere about it. If those kinds of needs were met — if I could achieve some kind of romantic fulfillment — perhaps I would stop having this strange dream.
Convinced by this logic — which could charitably be described as extremely simple — I downloaded a dating app that same day, and dove into a halfhearted search for a partner.
Without rising from seiza, I looked up at Stay Gold, who was scrolling through my phone on the sofa.
"Ohh."
……I had explained it myself and even I didn't understand it, hearing it laid out like that.
Stay Gold listened to my very long and very detailed account to the end, and returned exactly two characters. Just that — and it carried a strange weight. I kept my seiza and bowed my head. Having dreamed sweet, saccharine dreams with my assigned Uma Musume every night, and then becoming so absorbed in dating app searching that even my assigned student noticed something was off — anyone would say it made no sense.
"……"
The silence hurt. I wish the floor would swallow me up — this was probably the kind of moment that expression was invented for. I genuinely wanted a hole to open up in the trainer's room floor right now and drop me all the way to Brazil. At least in Brazil I could focus on soccer and stop thinking about all this damp, sad nonsense. Even if I'm terrible at soccer.
Meanwhile, Stay Gold slid her thumb across my phone screen.
"So, you're into this type."
"Huh……"
She tilted the screen toward me. There were profile photos of cheerful-looking men displayed there. Every last one of them was affiliated with an Uma Musume race club or training center in the greater metropolitan area, and they were all under thirty, over a hundred and seventy centimeters.
I snapped my head up.
"No no no no no! That's not — it's not like that!"
"But you 'liked' them."
"That's just — well — um……!"
There was no escape! (Despair)
"No, listen!? Like, you can't judge by a profile picture without meeting in person!? I wasn't just picking by face!"
"True. You did also filter for under-thirty and over one-seventy centimeters."
"Uggghh!! You of all people are the last one I wanted seeing this!!"
Stay Gold raised one eyebrow, visibly entertained. She was absolutely teasing me. I buried my face in my hands. Whatever I said would only dig the hole deeper — I'd accepted my fate. I gave in and bowed my head deeply again.
"I'm sorry, I was impulsive. But… I don't intend to let it interfere with your training, so please, if there's any way you could just let it go……"
Even saying it made me feel pathetic, but the current situation — in which I was, even if unconsciously, directing these feelings at my assigned Uma Musume — was even more pathetic. If things were going to go on like this, I was prepared to find a partner, one or even two. That was my resolve as a trainer. (※ Out of respect for your partner, please limit yourself to one.)
Stay Gold listened to my shame-soaked apology all the way to the end, then let out a small breath.
"I understand the general situation."
"Ah—"
There was a rapid tap-tap-tap sound, and then my phone was abruptly thrown at me. I caught it in a fluster and checked the screen — and the dating app, that very app, had been cleanly deleted without a trace.
"Wait — you deleted it!?"
"Yeah."
"Just like that!?"
"You don't need it."
As if it were the most obvious thing in the world. I opened my mouth to protest — but Stay Gold had already settled back into the chair.
"That problem of yours might actually have a pretty simple solution."
"……Huh?"
I'm having a dream.
I can't say with certainty how I know it's a dream, but I'm sure of it — this is a dream.
Before me is the same Stay Gold as always. She says nothing, and as always takes my right hand. The gesture is the same polished, practiced movement — it gives me no time to resist. Before I know it, I'm being drawn closer, a hand resting against my waist. My heart is loud. Even knowing it's a dream, I can't resist. Stay Gold smiles, and slowly brings her face close to mine.
Just a little more.
Just a few more centimeters, and our lips will meet——
"———Wait."
A familiar voice came from behind.
"Huh?"
Before I could answer, my body was yanked backward.
"!?"
The scenery spun. Slipping out of the girl's arms, I was pulled into someone's chest.
I looked up.
"……There are two Stay Golds!?!?"
Standing there was another Stay Gold, this one in her racing outfit. But her eyes were far sharper than usual. The eyes that were normally as gentle as a spring breeze had narrowed to those of a beast sizing up its prey, and she stepped forward to shield me behind her back. Then she said, low and flat, to the girl before her:
"……Who said you could touch my person?"
The dream-girl gave no answer. Just a single slow blink. Then, as if to say "uh oh, caught", she shrugged, scratched her head without a shred of shame, and laughed.
"Hey. Don't play dumb."
The girl made a gesture — index finger and thumb held together with just a tiny gap between them. Just this much, wasn't it? Barely anything at all. There wasn't a hint of remorse in the movement. Stay Gold's brow twitched.
"……You thought a little taste would be fine? It's not fine. Have some decency."
The girl spread both arms wide and shrugged.
"A peck counts? It's just a greeting? No, it doesn't count — the trainer is mine. Looking at her, touching her — those are privileges for me alone."
When Stay Gold said this sharp and final, the dream-girl puffed her cheeks as if to say "aww, come on" — and then pointed at me. Then pointed at herself. Then made a gesture of bringing both hands together.
"……'Even the trainer herself wasn't exactly protesting'?"
"……Wait — that's not — I was just——!"
See? the figure who was the spitting image of Stay Gold seemed to say, spreading both hands wide. She turned her palm toward me in an inviting gesture — utterly, infuriatingly composed.
"Even so — that's not a reason to lay hands on what's mine, you little play(·)boy(·)"
This time the dream-girl tapped her own chest with a finger. Then pointed at the Stay Gold before her and tilted her head.
"……'Aren't you both me'? Keep pushing that logic and I'm going to use my legs on you."
At those words, she drew one leg back lightly — a small preparatory swing, as if loosening up for a race. The instant the dream-girl saw it, her expression cracked for the first time. Those twilight-colored eyes went wide in something that looked like "wait, she means it" — and she hastily waved both hands, shaking her head desperately, as if to say "anything but that" and "let's talk this through."
"I'm going to make sure you can't cause trouble again."
Stay Gold stepped forward without mercy. The dream-girl stepped back. One more step. Then she turned on her heel and ran at full speed, yellow jacket billowing behind her.
"Hey — wait——!"
Stay Gold chased without hesitation, at a pace that matched her real-world speed. Across a golden meadow, two Stay Golds raced as if they were flying through the air.
One in silence, shoulders shaking with what looked like silent laughter.
One with the expression of someone genuinely at their wit's end.
It was so entertaining somehow that I clutched my stomach and laughed and laughed. And with that, the world swayed. The borders of the sky rippled like the surface of water, and the golden meadow spread its colors into a blur like ink dropped into water. The two sets of footsteps in the distance, the birds, the wind — all of it receded bit by bit. The scenery went white. My consciousness dissolved with it, into the haze.
"Get back here, you closing-runner running an escape——!!"
The shout, and an innocent child-like laugh in answer, served as my lullaby — and my consciousness quietly faded to black.
When I opened my eyes next, the first thing that came into my field of view was the familiar ceiling of the trainer's room.
"……Mm……"
I blinked, still foggy. When had I fallen asleep? Thinking this, I tried to shift — and noticed something odd.
"……?"
My chest was strangely warm. And there was a soft weight on it, too. I cautiously looked down.
"…………"
— There, drawing slow, even breaths, was Stay Gold's sleeping face. It looked slightly younger than usual — completely unguarded. One arm was wrapped around my back, and I for my part had both arms curled around her body. We looked for all the world like two children huddled together for warmth on a cold day.
"……………………"
How had it come to this again. The last thing I remembered was confessing everything to her, having the app deleted, and then… right, that's right. After that, she'd brought me over to the sofa. We'd been having a casual conversation, and apparently I'd dozed off somewhere in the middle.
"……suu"
In my arms, Stay Gold shifted slightly. I held my breath to avoid waking her.
I thought back over the strange dream.
The Stay Gold who had been furiously indignant in the dream. The Stay Gold who had been leading me astray. By now both had lost their sense of reality, hazy and distant. I was a little curious who had won their race, but that was probably a question for another time. They were likely still in the middle of it.
But strangely, there was one thing I was certain of.
— Tonight, I won't have that dream again.
……How long that would last — I didn't know yet.