Work Text:
Shoyo had absolutely no business being outside Miya Atsumu's apartment at eleven-thirty on a Thursday night.
He stared at the intercom.
Then stared at it harder.
He sighed.
"... This is so stupid"
He'd spent the last six months telling everyone – Kageyama, Yachi, Bokuto, even himself – that breaking things off with Atsumu had been the mature decision. That they weren't working anyway. Both were too busy, with different priorities, Atsumu was literally moving to another city.
Atsumu also didn't fight for them when Shoyo said those fucking words.
Asshole.
All technically true, though.
None of which explained why he was now wearing mismatched socks and standing in Osaka because he'd impulsively booked a train after Instagram reminded him that 3 years ago, he and Atsumu started dating.
(It was kind of cute. Atsumu, who was always all confident and cocky, was so nervous he genuinely stuttered when he confessed to Shoyo. Apparently he was interested in him since high school but never said anything because he was afraid he would get dumped.
Shoyo remembers being so shocked he couldn't say anything for several minutes until he realized Atsumu's smile was becoming smaller and smaller and his face wasn't even hiding his sadness.
It's not that he didn't like Atsumu.
Honestly, they spent so much time together at that time that, when Atsumu finally confessed, Shoyo was already interested in him for a couple of months anyway.
Atsumu's smile when he finally accepted will probably stay on his mind forever.)
He sighed.
"Just… say hi"
He pressed the button.
Three seconds.
Five.
Shoyo was literally about to leave and pretend none of this happened when…
"...Hello?"
Even over the scratchy speaker, Atsumu sounded sleepy.
Well, no shit. You decided to appear almost at midnight at his place without warning.
"... Hey"
Silence.
Another three seconds.
"Wait, Shoyo?"
"... Yeah"
Shoyo could see Atsumu's confusion even over the speaker. He was regretting absolutely everything that led to that decision. Who the fuck decides to visit their ex just because of Instagram?! He was losing his mind. Probably because of the final exams. Probably because he was freaking out. Probably because Kageyama has been annoying and rent will increase soon.
… Probably because he was missing him.
"Why are you outside my apartment?" Atsumu finally asked.
"... Lucky guess?"
Atsumu laughed.
Actually laughed.
"Oh my god"
The front door buzzed open.
X
On the way there, Shoyo made one mistake.
He opened the group chat.
Disaster Squad
(Yachi, Kageyama, Kenma, Bokuto and Shoyo)
Shoyo: hypothetical question
Bokuto: YES
Kageyama: No.
Kenma: I don't really like where this is going…
Shoyo: what if
Shoyo: purely hypothetical
Shoyo: someone booked a train to osaka to see their ex
Four dots immediately appeared.
Bokuto: ABSOLUTELY NOT
Kagemaya: Don't
Yachi: Nope
Kenma: This is a bad idea
Bokuto: I'M CALLING YOU
Shoyo's phone immediately rang.
"... Hello?"
"NO."
"You don't even know what I was gonna do"
"YES I DO, COME BACK HOME. NOW."
Shoyo sighed.
"I can't."
"WHY NOT? I CAN PICK YOU UP AT THE STATION" Shoyo heard some muffling songs and noises before Bokuto spoke again "STAY THERE"
"Bokuto, I'm already on the train. I left like 45 minutes ago."
"SHOYO, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD"
"I know…"
"NO, YOU DON'T. COME BACK HOME IMMEDIATELY. I WILL PAY FOR YOUR TICKET."
"I just wanna talk to him…"
Bokuto was silent for a few minutes until Shoyo heard a huge sigh from the other line.
"You know this is a bad idea, right?"
Yeah, probably.
X
When the apartment door swung open, Atsumu was wearing gray sweatpants, an old MSBY t-shirt and the expression of someone trying very hard not to smile.
Shoyo immediately wanted to punch him.
Or kiss him.
Or both.
He missed him so much.
Damn it.
"You've got nerve" Atsumu finally said, still trying not to smile.
"I know"
"You dumped me"
Shoyo sighed.
"I know…"
"You said we shouldn't keep doing this. Because we were hurting each other and we didn't have time to see each other." Atsumu took a long look at him "You said you felt like I didn't love you anymore."
"... I know"
"You traveled three hours."
Shoyo looked away, embarrassed.
"Yes"
Atsumu leaned against the doorway, clearly enjoying every single moment.
"So…" He said.
"So" Shoyo answered
They were both looking at each other now. Atsumu's face was now with the shameless smile possible while Shoyo was trying very hard to not run away from there. Bokuto was right, this was a bad idea.
No, not even bad.
Terrible idea.
"What do you want?"
Shoyo looked at him. Then immediately looked at the floor, he was sure his cheeks were pink now.
"I was nearby"
"The train station's nearby?" Atsumu said, raising an eyebrow.
Shoyo rolled his eyes: "Oh, shut up"
"I'm sorry" Atsumu said with a pleasant smile "I'm kind of enjoying this a lot"
"I can leave"
"You won't." Atsumu answered, very sure.
Shoyo sighed.
"Probably not" he said reluctantly
"It's too late," Atsumu said, pointing out the obvious.
"No shit, Sherlock"
They stood there simply looking at each other. The hallway was quiet except for someone's television down the corridor. Shoyo had no idea what Atsumu was thinking at that moment, only that Bokuto would kill him once he went back home.
Atsumu finally stepped aside.
"Come in before the neighbors think we're filming a soap opera."
X
The day they broke up was just an ordinary day at first.
The apartment he shared with Yachi and Kenma was quiet in an uncomfortable way only two busy people could make it. There wasn't a fight waiting to happen. There weren't raised voices, broken dishes, or dramatic accusations.
Just two people who were watching TV together, pretending everything was fine after a week of barely seeing each other. Surrounded by little reminders that they had been missing each other for months now. Atsumu's backpack was forgotten on the floor because he came straight from class while Shoyo's notebooks were scattered across the kitchen table.
Their dinner, a takeout they ordered and forgot to eat, had gone cold on the counter.
"I got offered the scholarship" Atsumu finally said, quietly "In Osaka"
Shoyo nodded.
"I know"
"It'd be only a train ride"
"I know"
"I'd still come"
"I know"
Every answer was the same. Mostly because Shoyo honestly had no idea what to say. He already knew where that was going the moment Atsumu stepped at his apartment… and he didn't like it at all.
He was happy for him. Of course he was happy, he was the one who helped him study whenever they could and kept making sure he was eating enough during all that stress.
He deserved that scholarship so much.
Atsumu rubbed the back of his neck: "Babe, you're answering like a broken NPC"
Shoyo laughed despite himself.
"I'm sorry"
Silence again.
It wasn't really about Osaka.
It was about the fact that they already live in the same city and still manage to go five days without eating together. It was about waking up to empty beds because one had morning class while the other would only get home after midnight.
It was about replying "sorry, i'm in class" so often it had become muscle memory.
About birthdays celebrated three days late, about anniversaries accidentally forgotten until someone saw the date on Instagram, about Shoyo saying he needed space and Atsumu actually giving him space when before he would sit down with him and ask what happened because he's always been annoying.
Neither of them had cheated.
They didn't even fight.
But it seemed that, with time, both of them had stopped trying. They'd simply become… incredibly good friends who occasionally crossed paths in college and would kiss each other quickly before going to class.
Shoyo sat on the edge of the couch.
"I miss you"
The words landed harder than either of them expected.
Atsumu looked away first.
"I know"
"I don't think you do"
"I do" Atsumu said again "I really do"
"Tsumu… I miss you. Not… the version that leaves sticky notes saying 'eat breakfast' because you're already gone when you sleep here."
"I leave those because I care," Atsumu said quietly, clearly hurt.
Shoyo kind of hated himself a little.
"I know" He answered softly "I know you care."
Another silence.
Atsumu finally sat beside him, careful not to bump shoulder.
"My move is in three weeks"
"I know"
"... You gonna keep saying that?"
"Probably"
That got a laugh from Atsumu, who looked at him softly.
"Okay"
They both stared at the cold noodles.
"I keep thinking," Shoyo finally admitted, quietly, kind of embarrassed "if we're already this bad at seeing each other…"
Atsumu didn't say anything, Shoyo forced himself to keep going.
"... what happens when you're two cities away?"
Atsumu didn't answer immediately. Probably because he's been asking himself the exact same thing.
Shoyo kind of missed how he used to be kind of obsessed with him in high school. How good they were once they started dating in college, all Atsumu's drama, his sarcasm towards other people, the way he was always mean in a funny way, how cocky he was, that playful jealousy he used to have that always made him smile because – despite being annoying for everyone else – it always made him feel loved.
Like Atsumu has been saying since he was 16 "Hey, I see you. I love you. You can hold my hand."
That man next to him was a completely different person.
"I'd make it work" He finally said.
"I know"
"I would"
"I know"
"... But?"
Shoyo swallowed.
"But… I don't think we are happy anymore."
That hurt. A lot. Atsumu physically leaned back like he'd been hit by a serve straight to the chest.
"We… aren't?"
Shoyo looked down at his hands, trembling.
"I don't know
"... That's not the same answer"
"I know"
"Shoyo, come on"
"I just…" Shoyo laughed nervously, "I spend more time looking at your location than actually seeing you."
"..."
"I know your whole schedule, probably better than you… But even so, I still can't see you properly."
"..."
"I know when you forget to pack lunch because you always go to Osamu's shop and you keep forgetting to turn your location off."
"..."
"I don't know when you started becoming just a notification on my phone."
Another awful pause.
Then Shoyo made the mistake.
The sentence came out before he had time to catch it,
"I don't… I don't really feel loved anymore"
Everything stopped.
Atsumu blinked once.
Then twice.
"What?!"
Shoyo's eyes winded immediately.
"NO! That's not-"
"What?" He was serious now, his expression unreadable.
"I didn't mean-"
"You don't feel like-"
"I know you love me!" Shoyo finally said, desperate.
Atsumu stood up.
"Then why would you say that?"
"I-"
"Hinata"
Oh shit.
Hinata.
His voice wasn't angry, which somehow made it worse.
"I drove three hours once because you said you missed me when I was visiting my parents"
"I know"
"I skipped classes for you"
"I know"
"I even slept on a train station once"
"I know"
"I used to watch videos of you playing in high school before my own because I wanted to know how you played and I liked how you cute you were when you were 16."
"I KNOW"
Shoyo stood too.
"I KNOW YOU DID"
Atsumu looked completely lost.
"Then why… Why would you think I don't love you?"
Shoyo covered his face.
"I don't." He closed his eyes, breathing slowly "I don't really think that… I just- I feel lonely. That's different. I just…" His voice cracked "I just miss being loved in person"
The apartment went completely still. Atsumu's shoulders slowly dropped and he looked devastated.
Because now he understood.
It wasn't that Shoyo doubted his love.
It was that love through text messages and a sleepover every other weekend had started feeling like memories instead of a relationship.
Atsumu sat back down.
"... I can't fix that"
Shoyo sat too.
"I know"
"Not right now"
"I know"
"I really want that scholarship"
"I know"
A quiet laugh escaped from him.
"I really hate how much you know"
"... I know"
"Please, stop"
"I'm sorry"
"I don't think you are"
"Yeah, not really"
For the first time in almost an hour, they both smiled.
It was small. Sad. But still there.
Shoyo stared at the floor.
"Maybe…" He hated every single word as it left him "... Maybe we should break up"
The sentence floated in the room like someone had let go of a balloon; neither of them dared to touch it. Like neither wanted to admit it was real. That they really got to this point, genuinely believing they can't fix something when they spent the last 3 years fixing every tiny thing that would bother them.
They always understood each other.
Always.
Atsumu inhaled slowly: "Is that what you want?"
"No" Shoyo said quietly, still looking at the floor, his hands still shaking "I don't want that."
His voice became embarrassingly tiny.
"I really really really don't want that."
"... Then why?"
"Because I don't know how to keep hurting like this."
Atsumu closed his eyes.
There wasn't an argument to make because he was hurting him. He missed brushing his teeth next to Shoyo, he missed hearing ridiculous stories after class, he missed grocery shopping together and arguing over whether tomatoes were fruits or vegetables. He missed complaining about overpriced burgers but buying it to Shoyo anyway.
He missed absolutely every boring thing.
The extraordinary moments weren't the problem.
It was that they no longer had ordinary ones.
"... Ok"
Just one word.
Quiet, accepting. A two letter word that hurt more than if Atsumu had begged.
Shoyo immediately regretted everything. Immediately.
The second "ok" left Atsumu's mouth and every cell in his body screamed WAIT. NO. UNDO IT. ABORT MISSION. CODE RED. ABORT MISSION.
He opened his mouth.
No no no no no no no no. Please, no.
Don't do this to me.
Please.
Nothing came out.
Atsumu stood, and looked at him with a sad smile.
"I will always wish you the best" He finally said "I think part of me will always love you. I don't regret a single moment. You've been breaking my heart since high school, anyway."
Shoyo didn't say anything. He didn't want to cry. Not right now. Not in front of him.
After nearly a full minute, Atsumu awkwardly pointed towards the kitchen.
"Can I take the leftovers?"
"... What?"
"The noodles"
Shoyo blinked.
"... You… You want the breakup noodles?"
"I paid for half"
Shoyo smiled. Only Atsumu could make a breakup end like that.
"That's fair."
"It would be wasteful"
"Yeah"
Shoyo started laughing first, followed by Atsumu. Within seconds they were both laughing so hard neither could breathe.
"This is the stupidest breakup in history" Shoyo wheezed. "We're dividing noodles! Tsumu, they are not even that good!"
"I know!"
"They're cold"
"I KNOW!"
Atsumu wiped his eyes.
"I'll take them anyway"
"Okay"
Atsumu packed the noodles into a container with ridiculous seriousness and labeled it with masking tape: ATSUMU'S SAD NOODLES.
Shoyo stared.
"You're unbelievable"
"Food's expensive"
"We're literally breaking up"
"Let me just get the noodles, I'm already sad I got dumped" Atsumu said sarcastically "I don't like wasting food. Just… sad noodles for the sad guy."
Another helpless laugh.
When Atsumu finally reached the door, the apartment became quiet again.
Shoyo was still thinking in different ways of asking him to come back that they could make it work and breaking up was stupid and he already regrets everything and he will buy him good noodles and he can't remember how it is to sleep without him when he's there and he feels like he's losing his best friend and
Jesus Christ.
Calm down.
He watched Atsumu slip his shoes on, put one hand on the doorknob and looked at him one last time.
"... Take care of yourself"
"You too. I will be rooting for you there. I hope you get everything you want because you deserve it." Shoyo said, tears in his eyes again.
"And you stop trying to climb trees at campus"
"I only fell once," Shoyo said, outraged.
"Three times
"... Allegedly."
Atsumu smiled.
God.
He still loves him.
So much.
Shoyo looked like he wanted to say something.
His lips parted.
Don't go.
Stay.
Forget everything I just said.
But instead…
"Bye, Tsumu"
Atsumu nodded once.
"Bye, babe"
Like he would come back. Like they were still fine. Like they just didn't break up.
The door clicked shut and Shoyo stood frozen for exactly four seconds until he started crying. Hard. An ugly cry like he just broke a leg or something.
He buried his face in both hands.
"I am the biggest idiot alive."
His phone buzzed.
He snatched it up so quickly he nearly dropped it.
Maybe it was him. Maybe they could still fix it. Maybe they both agreed they were being idiots.
Yachi: At the supermarket rn
Yachi: You need something?
Shoyo sighed.
My boyfriend.
X
His apartment looked almost the same as the old one he had in the other city. Full of posters of bands Atsumu never liked but put on the walls anyway 'because they are cool', the same ridiculously expensive coffee machine, the same plant Atsumu insisted for years wasn't dying (it was absolutely dying).
"You didn't water this"
"I did"
"It looks haunted"
"It's dramatic"
"So are you"
Atsumu laughed: "Fair enough"
Shoyo laughed despite himself.
That was the problem.
Everything with Atsumu was easy. Even after they broke up and he immediately asked for the cold noodles. Especially after they broke up and he respectfully stopped going to the same places as him because he knew Shoyo was still crying his heart out at home (Atsumu saw all Bokuto's angry tweets about him. Even if Atsumu was the one who got dumped).
Everything with Atsumu has been easy since the beginning.
Which was incredibly inconvenient.
X
Even after 2 months since the break up, Shoyo refused to leave the house or go to college. He wasn't checking his phone and Kenma was constantly going to his room to make sure he was alive.
To get to the point that Kenma, the guy who hates going out and leaving the house because he prefers to play games all day, gets worried… Something is really really wrong.
"I miss him" Shoyo blurted to Bokuto and Kageyama when they showed up to visit him… with noodles. That made him cry even more. "I miss him so much"
Kageyama's expression softened.
"... Aww."
"I want to…" Shoyo said after every sob. "I want… To text him… And tell him… That I… I… I regret everything" He bursts into tears. "I regret everything. I thought it wouldn't hurt because he wasn't here anyway but now he's really not here and he will never show up anymore. Like, never."
Kageyama sighed.
"Ok, first of all: Do NOT text him."
"But-"
"Yeah, dude. Don't text him. Things will get worse for both of you." Bokuto said. "It's not worth it, you'll be just poking on the wound."
"He might miss me too." Shoyo said quietly.
"He probably does," Kageyama admitted. "Still: Don't."
"What if he's thinking about texting me?"
"Then he'll also make the wrong decision."
"I could just send…" Hinata made quotation marks "'Hope you're doing well in Osaka'"
Bokuto looked genuinely horrified.
"That's the emotional equivalent of setting a building on fire"
Kageyama leaned across the table, opening a bag of chips.
"Just delete his number"
"I memorized"
"WHY?!" Bokuto asked shocked
"BECAUSE WE DATED FOR THREE YEARS!" Shoyo said, crying even more. "OF COURSE I KNOW HIS NUMBER BY HEART"
.
Eventually, Kenma simply confiscated Shoyo's phone.
Not even because he wanted to text Atsumu anymore, but because he spent the afternoon on Atsumu's social media like a creep and looking at photos saved on his phone like a psychopath.
"Give my phone back"
"No."
"Kenma."
"Shoyo."
"I'm gonna call Kuroo"
Kenma laughed: "With what phone?"
"I fucking hate you"
"No, you don't"
Shoyo sighed, then looked at him, very seriously.
"I need it"
"For what?"
"... Candy Crush"
"You don't play Candy Crush"
"I might start playing it as a distraction," Shoyo said, annoyed.
Kenma only gave his phone back when Shoyo started showering again and decided to go back to class again. With proper clothes. Not wearing Atsumu's hoodie like it's a second skin and looking miserable anymore because it still smelled like him.
"I do have a question, though," Yachi said once when they were both studying at the library.
"What?"
"When exactly did you decide that texting him was a good idea?"
"I didn't"
"So you acknowledge it was a bad idea"
"... Yes."
"And you still want to do it"
Shoyo sighed.
"Yes"
Yachi blinked.
"Well, you're kind of dumb"
He threw a pencil at her.
X
"You hungry?"
"I literally came here because I'm an idiot that can't think straight after Instagram show me a notification"
Atsumu laughed.
"So yes"
"... Yeah"
Atsumu started making instant ramen while Shoyo perched on the kitchen counter. Still feeling stupid, still knowing that was a terrible idea and he should go home, still hating himself because that was so familiar he almost got up to kiss Atsumu's neck like he used to.
Like they'd only skipped a weekend instead of nearly 6 months.
"So…" Atsumu stirred the pot.
"Hm?"
"What changed?"
Shoyo scratched his cheek.
"Nothing"
"Bullshit." Atsumu said looking at him now "You just mentioned a notification on Instagram"
Shoyo sighed, annoyed.
"I was walking home after class and Instagram showed me a notification saying that 3 years ago we started dating. That picture in the ice cream shop, you know? With the stupid matching hoodies?" He forced himself to continue "So… I booked a train and… Now I'm here... I missed you, I guess"
Atsumu stopped stirring.
"You guess?"
"I know." Shoyo said reluctantly "I know I miss you. Happy now?"
Atsumu smiled.
"Very."
A beat.
"You know this is a bad idea, right?"
"I'm aware"
"You broke up with me"
"I know"
"You said we don't have time for each other"
"I know"
"Uhum"
"And I know showing up here at midnight is… embarrassing." Shoyo said scratching his neck, uncomfortable.
"I'd rank it higher than embarrassing."
Shoyo scoffed.
"You're still a jerk, you know that?"
"I'd say showing up here at midnight is pathetic." Atsumu completed.
"You're so fucking mean, I swear to god-"
"I know I'm mean, babe" Atsumu hums "But I'm also right"
Babe.
Now he's calling me 'babe'.
Oh damn.
Shoyo groaned and covered his face. He knew he was blushing.
"I almost turned around at the station. Then I almost didn't press the intercom's button. I almost listened to Bokuto and bought a ticket back home as soon as I got here"
"What stopped you?"
",,, I wondered if you missed me too"
The kitchen became very quiet. The noodles boiled over but Atsumu ignored it, he was still too busy looking at Shoyo with the most unreadable expression in history.
Shoyo sighed.
But then…
"I hate breakfast here"
Shoyo blinked: "What?"
"After we broke up," Atsumu said, shrugging awkwardly, "No one stole my eggs."
"I used to steal your eggs because you always overcooked mine"
"Exactly"
"I can't even watch volleyball anymore" Atsumu continued "Because every time someone did one of those ridiculous quick attacks I'd think-" He interrupted himself "You know what? Nevermind."
"No"
"No?"
"Tell me"
"I don't want to"
"I literally booked a last-minute train and traveled for 3 hours just to show up here and have you call me pathetic." Shoyo said serious "Your sentence can't possibly be worse than this"
Atsumu sighed.
He had a point.
"I'd think: 'Shoyo would've celebrated this like he'd won the Olympics.'"
Shoyo smiled before he could stop himself.
"... That's kind of pathetic too"
"I know"
"I like it"
Atsumu takes a long look at him: "I hate that you like it."
X
4 months after the breakup, Shoyo was at a diner with Yachi and Kenma when his phone buzzed.
Everyone freezed and Kenma looked down at the screen.
"Oh no"
"... Who is it?" Yachi asked, curious, leaning at the table to see it too "Oh, no"
"It's Atsumu" Shoyo said in a whisper "What the fuck?"
"What does it say?" Yachi says slowly, like Shoyo might run away and don't stop until he's in Osaka if she says something too fast.
Like she was talking to a scared animal she found on the street.
Kenma read it
Tsumu <3: found one of your hoodies while unpacking. do you want it back or am i legally allowed to keep it now?
"Oh for fucks sake" Kenma sighed "Why the fuck you didn't change his contact's name? Why the hell do you still have his number saved?"
Shoyo ignored him, still staring at the text.
"I mean…"
"No" Yachi says immediately
"I could get my hoodie back"
"You are not answering him" Kenma says "We can go to the mall and buy you a new one"
"I really liked that hoodie"
"You don't even know what hoodie he's talking about"
"I feel it"
"Shoyo, no." Yachi says serious
"He asked me first…" Shoyo says still staring at his phone "It would be rude not to answer"
Kenma already looked tired: "No."
"I could just say-"
They pointed at him: "DON'T."
Shoyo looked at them annoyed.
"You two are really annoying"
Kenma shrugs.
"We are just saying that when this inevitably becomes a terrible decision…"
He patted Shoyo on the shoulder.
"... you'll never be able to say no one warned you."
X
They ate ramen on the floor like they always had.
Talking about everything except the breakup. Shoyo told him about Kenma's decision of becoming an actual streamer, how Kageyama and Bokuto failed different classes, how Yachi is the only one who will probably graduate on time because Shoyo himself also failed at some classes because he missed most of them – he didn't mention the reason, Atsumu also didn't ask.
Atsumu told him about Osaka, about how the scholarship is really nice, how he's still adjusting but is facetiming his brother every night, how he already knows a good cafe shop near his house and how his classes are incredibly tiring because everyone is too serious, but he already made friends there, so… It's been good.
Nothing is important.
Everything is important.
Eventually, Atsumu looks at him and gives him a half-smile.
"You never answered my text about your hoodie"
"I was physically stopped of doing that"
Atsumu blinks.
"I… I think I won't ask any questions about this"
Shoyo hums: "It's probably for the best." Then he looks at Atsumu "Where's my hoodie, though?"
"Hm?"
"The hoodie. That is mine." Shoyo explains "Where is it?"
Atsumu looked down.
"I took away from your house on the day you break up with me on purpose" He says quietly, embarrassed "You've worn it so much that it smells like you"
"..."
"So I kept wearing it."
Shoyo blinks.
"That's somehow romantic and creepy"
"I contain multitudes"
X
One evening, Shoyo was sprawled across the couch with Kageyama's hoodie he's stolen over his head, scrolling through social media while waiting for their takeout to arrive. He wasn't looking for anything in particular, just… judging people and liking some stories, sometimes laughing at some Reels.
Until a familiar blond head appeared on his screen.
Atsumu.
Living his best life in Osaka, apparently.
The post was a carousel: Atsumu at a cafe, Atsumu at college, Atsumu laughing with some classmates, Atsumu standing in front of Osaka Castle looking annoyingly photogenic. The caption was some shit like 'home sweet home' or whatever, followed by enough sparkles and emojis to be legally considered a visual hazard.
Shoyo frowned.
"... He looks happy"
Kageyama didn't look up from the kitchen, where he was trying to open a stubborn soy sauce packet.
"Okay"
"And he's gotten… taller"
"He hasn't"
"And his hair looks nicer"
"It's the same terrible hair"
Shoyo zoomed anyway.
"... I think I hate him"
Kenma walked in the living room and spotted Kageyama looking tired and Shoyo looking incredibly annoyed.
"What happened?"
Kageyama pointed at Shoyo.
"Miya"
"... Right?"
"He's in Osaka"
"I know"
"Shoyo saw him on Instagram and now it is everyone's problem."
Kenma sighed with all the weight of a deeply burdened man.
"I told you to unfollow him months ago"
"I know" Shoyo said still looking at the picture "I just saw him smiling and it annoyed me"
Kenma blinked.
"I think you're just jealous"
Shoyo's head snapped up immediately.
"I'm not jealous"
"You literally said you hate that he looks happy," Kageyama said from the kitchen. Traitor.
"I hate that he looks happy on my phone. There's a difference."
"There isn't"
Shoyo huffed and tossed the phone onto the couch, crossing his arms.
"He's probably posting those just to show off. Like 'Look how happy I am, breakup made my skin better and my hair looks gorgeous after stupid Hinata Shoyo broke up with me. Look at what he lost. Hashtag Single Life'" Shoyo sighed "Honestly, he's such an asshole."
Kenma picked up the phone and deadpanned "This is just a picture of ramen"
"Exactly. He's showing off the ramen"
Kageyama snorts: "You've become a hater"
"I have not"
"You absolutely have" Kenma says kind of laughing.
"... Does the ramen look good?"
Kenma looked back at the picture.
"Yeah"
"I knew it!" Shoyo groaned dramatically and buried his face into the couch cushion "I fucking hate Osaka"
X
"Osaka seems nice" Shoyo says after a while, the ramen is already forgotten and they are both sitting down at Atsumu's couch while a random tv show plays on the TV.
"It is"
"I think I should go" Shoyo says quietly. It was almost 3 in the morning.
Atsumu didn't say anything.
Then he looked at Shoyo like he was stupid: "Seriously?"
"I mean.. Yeah?"
"At 3 in the morning?"
"Yup"
Atsumu sighs, frustrated.
"This is exactly why we broke up"
"Probably"
"We are terrible at boundaries"
"I know"
"We're making objectively awful decisions"
Shoyo looks at him with a tiny smile: "I know that since I booked the train"
"That is also something we should talk about. You shouldn't be so reckless." Atsumu says pointing at him "Osaka can be dangerous at night!"
"... I know"
"So"
"What?" Shoyo asked without looking at him.
"Do you wanna try again?
Shoyo blinked.
Well, that was fast.
"What?!"
"Not tonight," Atsumu smiled. "Obviously. Just… I'm not saying pretend nothing happened"
He got closer enough that Shoyo could smell his cologne.
Shit.
"I'm saying… maybe this time we don't try to fit each other around our schedules"
Shoyo looked up at him, waiting for him to continue.
His heart was beating so hard he was sure Atsumu could hear it.
"Maybe we fit our schedules around each other."
"... That's cheesy as fuck"
Atsumu shrugs: "I can be romantic"
Shoyo smiled.
"Yeah"
"Yeah?"
"I mean… yeah. I'm already here anyway." Shoyo said "I already know I can survive the trip"
Atsumu reached for his hand instead of kissing him. Which was a surprisingly careful gesture. Like they both knew rushing was what got them there in the first place.
Their fingers intertwined.
"... Still think it's a bad idea?"
Shoyo grinned.
"The worst"
Atsumu laughed.
"Good"
"Why's that?"
"Because the worst ideas are the ones I always end up committing to" He said ".... And you've been a bad idea for me since high school"
Shoyo rolled his eyes.
"That might be the dumbest thing you've ever said"
Atsumu squeezed Shoyo's hand.
"You're still here, though. So it's clearly working."
Shoyo looked around the apartment. At the ramen bowls, the dying plant, the hoodie that had somehow become Atsumu's, his hand on his, warm, soft, perfect.
"Yeah" he said smiling "I guess it is"
X
Shoyo was halfway out the classroom door, already thinking about food instead of homework, when his phone buzzed. He glanced down without stopping, expecting another argument between Bokuto and Kageyama on their groupchat, only to be greeted by Instagram cheerfully informing him: "3 years ago today."
It was a picture of him and Atsumu on their first official date, both smiling so hard they looked ridiculous. Atsumu had somehow convinced him to wear matching hoodies, they were holding ice creams, and the caption simply read: guess we're dating lol.
Shoyo stared at it for exactly 2 minutes.
3 years ago…
"Three years?" He said out loud to no one in particular. Still looking at the picture and feeling something snapped inside of him.
He opened a travel app with the speed of a man fleeing the scene of a crime.
He will go to Osaka.
Fuck it.
It's expensive.
Horrifically expensive.
"This is a bad idea, right?" He says quietly to himself. "Seeing him tonight. It's definitely a bad idea."
I should probably not.
I really should not.
…
Fuck it, it's fine.
He booked it anyway.