Work Text:
Sasuke clutches tight onto his mother’s pant leg and tries to hide further behind her. The red-haired woman that he had just been introduced to was squealing far too loud and making grabbing motions towards him.
He immediately didn’t trust her.
Mikoto, his mother, softly chuckles and tries to ease Sasuke back in front of her with a hand on his back but he hardly budges. The redhead has a huge mouth and shiny white teeth and he is afraid she might grab him and bite his head off.
His brother told him that those sort of things happened to cute kids. And his mother always told him he was cute.
He wasn’t willing to risk it.
“Oh my God, you are just too handsome! He looks just like you Mikoto! How old are you young man?”
All eyes look to him and for the first time he notices the little blond boy standing behind the redhead using her as a human shield much like he was doing with his mother. He clinches his teeth tight together and puffs out his cheeks, turning red in the face.
“Sasuke, be polite and answer her question.” His mother urges him.
He releases her pants long enough to hold up all his fingers on one hand and one on the other, and then he quickly wraps himself back around Mikoto’s leg, burying his face into the thick fabric. Mikoto chuckles lightly again and rests her hand on his head.
“I’m sorry Kushina, Sasuke is terribly shy.”
Kushina lets out another one of her far-too-loud laughs.
“Hey! No harm! Here come in, come in, how rude of me to make you stand outside.” She waves them in through the doorway of the quaint suburban home. Sasuke tries to dig in his heels but his mother drags him inside the house and gives him a look that he knows means he better behave or else.
“…so happy you agreed to come over.” Kushina continues to chatter non-stop as she walks further into the home. “And to bring Sasuke with you! Naruto just loves making new friends don’t you honey? Well don’t be rude, go show him your new swing set. Naruto’s dad set it up late time he was home. He just adores it so much, oh I wish you could have seen him try to help his dad with the shovel! It was just too cute…”
Sasuke stands in the foyer and doesn’t know how to process the sensory overload that is Kushina. He looks around the house, lightly painted walls that were covered in pictures, a stack of shoes haphazardly cluttering around the doorway, random clothes hung over the banisters and toys littered the hallway. He finally lands his gaze back on the blond hair boy who hadn’t followed the women.
They stare each other down like the actors do in the old cowboy tv shows Naruto’s dad sometime watches. He tries to keep his face blank but loses it to a fit of giggles that rack his body. The little black haired boy just looks so sour!
“I’m Naruto!” He introduces himself, flashing a huge grin that could rival his mothers, a gap in the front teeth from where he had lost one a week or so prior. He gives the other boy no time to answer, just grabs his hand and drags him back out the door and around the house to the backyard. “Come on! Let’s see who can jump off the swings farthest!”
Sasuke is reluctant at first but becomes intrigued when the challenge is issued.
“You’re on.”
“Can’t your mother cook anything else other than soup?” Sasuke leans down and moves some Tupperware out of the way to see if there was anything edible-- read: not cooked by Kushina-- in the refrigerator.
“Dude, you’ve been coming over for almost three years now, you know her bad luck in the kitchen. Need I remind you when she tried to make spaghetti?”
Sasuke cringes. He did although he wish he could forget. That had been the worst case of the runs he has ever had in his 10 years. Never again.
Naruto pops his head from behind the cupboard door to give Sasuke a cheeky grin. Sasuke flips him the bird. Naruto, not one to back down from a challenge, blows a raspberry. Sasuke takes the bait and quickly grabs the younger boy around the neck, giving him noogie. Both boys are full-fledged wrestling when Kushina comes into the kitchen, catching them red handed.
“Boys! Not in the kitchen!”
They jump apart immediately. Sasuke mutters a quick ‘yes, ma’am’ and Naruto jabs him one more time in the ribs. Sasuke glares but doesn’t retaliate.
Him? Scared of Kushina? Noooo.
Naruto snickers at his best friend. He knows his number.
“What are you two doing? Would you like me to make you some lunch? I just made this great tomato bisque recipe Sasuke! I know how much you love tomatoes! We could make some grilled cheese to go along with it!” Kushina putters along, talking a mile a minute in her normal fashion, leaving no time to answer her any one of her thousands of questions.
Naruto and Sasuke collectively groan….just not loud enough for Kushina to hear.
They both want to live to see middle school, you know.
The boys are in junior high the first time they get into a fist fight with each other. Their fiercely competitive friendship gave birth to a brutal altercation that left both sporting black eyes, suspended from school, and not talking to each other. All over a stupid girl no less.
Naruto seethes as he walks down the road towards his ex-best friend’s house. Like hell had he forgiven that asshole. He clinches tight the massive bowl his mother had pushed into his hands before telling him “Stop sulking and take this to Mikoto.”
That traitor. Making him go over there just to deliver some stupid soup that he knew Mikoto would just place in the freezer and forget. And he wasn’t sulking damnit!
That dillhole son of hers, thinking he was all holier than everyone because girls flocked to him. He was so conceited! Naruto daydreams about chucking the bowl of hot soup in Sasuke’s face. He imagines the boy opening the front door, looking stupid and maybe even standing there with his mouth slightly gaped open like a clueless fish out of water as Italian Wedding dripped down his face.
Though, when he bangs on the Uchiha Family’s front door all his rage disappears. What if Sasuke and him are never friends again? What if Sasuke hates him for real? What if Sasuke starts dating that girl and everyone shuns Naruto because he was only cool when he was best friends with the coolest dude in school and now that the coolest guy in school hates him everyone else will to?
He’ll have to start hanging out with that really weird kid that is always drawing or the really quiet one who keeps bugs in his pockets. What if neither of them liked playing ‘who can run fastest’ or ‘who can shoot the most hoops’ or ‘who wins best out of three on Mortal Kombat’ or ‘who can eat Kushina’s food fastest’, What would he do then?
Sasuke jerks the door open and scowls. He crosses his arms over his chest and gives his best Go Die glare to the nervous looking boy on the door step.
Naruto thrusts the bowl towards Sasuke but keeps his eyes anywhere but on his face. He forces himself to look peeved.
“Mom sent this over for your mother as an apology for me.” Not that I’m sorry that you’re an ungrateful fuck face. He adds in his head.
Sasuke stares at the boy for long enough to make Naruto fidget then he takes the offered dish. Naruto thinks he is about to get the door slammed in his face and is preparing to turn around when Sasuke whispers, “I’m sorry, you know, about calling you…that…”
It’s so low that Naruto almost doesn’t catch it, but it stops him in his tracks all the same.
“I know you’re not…I mean, it doesn’t matter if you are…” He trails off again. He inhales deeply before continuing “Anyway, I told Sakura that I didn’t think she was that annoying, but that my answer is still the same.”
Naruto quickly picks his jaw up off the ground. Did the proud jackass just apologize and admit to rejecting the prettiest girl in their school all in the same sentence? This day needs to be recorded in the history books. Naruto wishes he had a cell phone so he could record it and replay it any time Sasuke makes fun of him, as in ‘see look, I knew you had a soul!’
“Wha—why would you do that?” Naruto asked, incredulously. Why would Sasuke turn down Sakura? Everyone with a brain has a crush on Sakura! Naruto’s blood is pumping a little fast, but it feels different then the nerves he was feeling over pushing the doorbell.
It is Sasuke’s turn to get all shifty eyed. “You’re supposed to go out with people you are attracted to. Sakura is pretty and smart…but I don’t like her like that.”
A pregnant silence falls between the two boys, Naruto ringing his hands together not sure what to say next and Sasuke looking slightly ill after talking about his feelings. Ugh. Why did he feel like he had to say this or something bad would happen? What was it with being around Naruto that made him act differently than how he normally acted around everyone else? He usually understood himself pretty well, but he always felt a little lost when it came to Naruto. What is he supposed to do? He is only 13 and it seemed like a really odd thing to notice at this age.
Naruto is looking like he might start crying or yelling and Sasuke decides he doesn’t want to deal with either so he says, “Itachi left Kill Bill last time he was home. Do you want to watch it with me?”
Naruto can’t stop the big smile that takes over his face. It looks like they’d be okay after all.
Kushina only allows Naruto to miss school if he is running a fever so the first day Naruto doesn’t show up for school, Sasuke thinks nothing much of it. He texts him that evening but gets distracted with homework for his AP classes and forgets about it again.
The second day Naruto doesn’t show up for school has Sasuke checking his read receipts. Kushina is the type of woman to overreact so a fever automatically meant a same-day doctor visit which usually resulted in Naruto’s behind being back in school quickly. His texts say messaged delivered but not read. Sasuke hides in the bathroom during lunch and tries to call his best friend.
Straight to voicemail.
By the fourth day of silence Sasuke is getting really worried. He finally breaks down and asks all their friends if anyone has heard from Naruto but everyone looks around and gives various versions of the same answer. No. The longest Sasuke has gone without hearing from Naruto was 3 years ago when they didn’t speak for 4 days after Naruto got mad at him for ‘rudely’ telling Sakura to focus her feelings on someone else in which Sasuke called Naruto a fag and told him to mind his own business. They had not had a fight since.
On Friday after school Sasuke asks his mother if he has heard from Kushina recently.
“Is something wrong love?” She asks, while not looking up from the catalog she is browsing at the kitchen table. He tries not to let his mother see how nervous he feels but he can’t stop switching his weight from one foot to the other.
“Naruto didn’t come to school at all this week.” He supplies.
She makes a distracted noise and flips the page. He fights the urge to rip the catalog out of her hands. Everyone’s lack of concern was starting to really piss him off. Ino had even teased him about missing ‘his boyfriend’ when he tried to round-about ask her if she had spoken to Naruto. If she mysteriously started getting texts asking for a good time, he had no idea how that happened. He certainly didn’t write her number in every men’s bathroom at all 6 of the local McDonald’s. He doesn’t even eat that crap.
He will not lose his temper with his mom. He will not lose his temper with his mom. He will not lose his temper with his mom.
“Can you at least call her?” he finally asks after mentally having to talk himself away from the edge.
She sighs loudly and looks at him. “Wasn’t Minato due to arrive home from deployment soon? I’m sure Naruto is just staying home with his dad.”
“He isn’t supposed to be coming back for another month or two! Mom, please? Naruto hasn’t been answering his texts and all my calls go straight to voicemail.”
“Fine.” She gives in. “Hand me the phone. But if Minato is home you leave the family alone so they can spend some quality time together.”
Sasuke finds the cordless house phone and gives it to his mother, trying to act cool and collected as he watches her dial the number but his gut twists a little tighter with each ring that goes unanswered.
Finally he hears the line get picked up, “You’ve reached the Uzumak—”
His mother hangs up without leaving a message. Sasuke feels like he could vomit.
Something bad is happening, he just knows it.
^^^---^^^---^^^---^^^---^^^---^^^
It is early Saturday morning when Sasuke walks up the steps to Naruto’s house. For a moment he thinks about all the times he has done this exact same thing, ever since he was an insufferably shy 6 year old. As he stares at the door he realizes that this time feels completely different.
He feels like he was getting ready to cross a line that he would never be able to go back over, like he was getting ready to pass Go without collecting his cash. Momentarily he considers turning around and waiting it out. Maybe Minato did come home early. Maybe something else big happened in the family. Maybe Naruto caught Mono and Kushina wouldn’t let him go to school until he wasn’t contagious.
Sasuke tells himself to not be a pansy. He takes a deep breath and lifts a slightly shaking hand up to the doorbell. It’s cold outside, it’s early December and threatening to snow any minute, his nose feels frozen but he can feel the sweat rolling down his back from where he practically ran all the way here.
He presses the button and waits.
And waits.
He takes a step back and looks at the windows. All the curtains are drawn and there are no lights on.
He waits some more.
He thinks maybe 9am is a little early to show up at someone’s house.
He knocks and waits. His mother would strangle him if she found out he hit a doorbell more than once.
He notices some snow flurries begin to fall and he starts to feel defeated. What happened to Naruto?
He turns to leave and is almost to the sidewalk when he hears the door open. He swings around to see the subject of his concern looking like he hasn’t sleep in years, big bags under puffy red eyes and clothes haphazardly clinging to his body. They make eye contact for a second before Naruto turns and walks back into the house, leaving the door wide open.
Sasuke rushes in behind him. He has never seen Naruto look so bleak.
He finds Naruto again in his bedroom, face down on the bed. Sasuke doesn’t know what to do, so he does the only thing that makes sense. He sits down next to Naruto and waits.
He notes that Naruto’s room has taken to looking filthy as well as cluttered.
And he waits some more.
He looks out the window and sees the snow accumulating quickly on the ground.
And he waits.
Sasuke sucks air through his teeth loudly and thinks about how he usually has no problem with his patience. Really, he must have the endurance of a saint after all this waiting Naruto has been forcing on him. Naruto makes no movements. He isn’t sure how long they stay like this, he zones out feeling slightly better now that he can see his friend is physically okay although he can tell there is still something seriously wrong.
He tries to think about what he should do. Should he be direct and ask? Should he console him without asking what happened? Should he touch him like his mother does when he is upset? Maybe pet his hair? Maybe offer him a joint?
Sasuke hovers his hand over Naruto’s back, the moment of hesitation both freaking him out and angering him. He opens his mouth, to say what he isn’t sure, when Naruto’s shoulder start shaking and his breath goes from measured to quivering.
Sasuke realizes that Naruto is crying. Shit…what should he do now? He scrabbles to think of anything that he could do that would comfort Naruto. Why did he care? Naruto cries all the time at stupid things like animal charity commercials and Sasuke never felt the need to comfort him before. Why now?
Naruto says something into the mattress that Sasuke can’t understand. He leans closers and starts rubbing on Naruto’s back awkwardly like his mother does when he is sick, without even quite registering that his hand has taken action his brain hasn’t processed yet.
“I can’t hear you Naru.”
He is answered with choking sobs and Naruto shaking his head into the mattress like he just couldn’t deal. It takes a moment but Naruto calms down enough to force his voice to be a little bit louder and clearer.
“H-h-h-he’s….he’s dead.” Naruto’s cries get louder as ice spreads down Sasuke’s spine.
“What? Who’s dead? Tell me what’s wrong.”
Naruto has to take a moment, he gulps down some oxygen and Sasuke can tell his is counting to himself to help focus his grief. Finally, Naruto looks up at Sasuke who is leaning just a little too close and has emotions like worry written so blatantly across his face that Naruto think fleetingly that his best friend has been abducted and this is an alien in Sasuke’s place because Sasuke never feels emotions like worry.
The last bit of control snaps at that moment and Naruto throws his himself into his friend’s arms. He cries long and hard and Sasuke can feel his shoulder getting wet and he knows he will be covered in snot after this is over but he can’t seem to care about that because Naruto’s crying is causing the worst clenching sensation in his chest.
“My dad died Sasuke.” Naruto speaks after another long silence. The sobbing had stopped again and he returned back to his previous catatonic state. “He is gone. Forever.”
Damnit all to hell, this was probably the most awful thing to be right about. Sasuke knew something was seriously wrong. Why did he wait so long to seek out Naruto? Of course Naruto wouldn’t be searching to speak about this, he can barely think about it without losing control of his emotions. But Sasuke should have been here nonetheless.
Sasuke holds his best friend and tries to keep a handle on the dread that has settled in his bones. He watches the snow now falling outside the window in steady sheets. He gives Naruto silence condolence as he mourns the loss of his father.
Sasuke feels completely out of place but can’t think of anywhere else he rather be.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
For Christmas that year Sasuke’s parents give him the keys to a new Mazda 3 Hatchback that they had hidden inside the pocket of an extremely gaudy Christmas sweater, complete with Santa water skiing and embedded flashing LED lights. He is not amused, but he does like his car.
The first thing he does once he is relieved of family duties is drive over to Naruto’s house. Not to brag. He couldn’t even say it was because it was Naruto’s first Chirstmas without his dad because that wasn’t exactly true. Minato had been in the military for longer than Naruto had been alive. Hell, Sasuke didn’t even know what Minato had done for the military, all he knew was that Minato would be gone for sometimes years at a time, would be home for mere weeks, then would be deployed once again. Neither Naruto nor Kushina had seemed to be that bothered by Minato’s absence and although Sasuke had only meet the guy maybe 10 times max, Sasuke could tell they all had a really good relationship with each other.
No, his reasons were purely selfish. He couldn’t stand the idea of being too far from Naruto anymore.
Since that day where he sought out his missing friend something had snapped in the back of his mind. Where he had subconsciously always expected Naruto to be there with him it had dawned on him that at any moment Naruto could be gone. Where would he be without his best friend, who always opened his mouth first, who didn’t always say the smartest things but seemed to always know what Sasuke was thinking like an inbred sixth sense, who would be his second in command when they were pranking some snobby classmate, and who would encourage him to always be the best he could be not because he needed to be better than his brother to get his parents attention, but because Naruto always looked so damn proud when Sasuke succeeded.
Feelings that had seemed confusing to his 13 year old self had begun to make sense now. He was only a few years away from being a young adult and he was not naïve. He knew about gender identity and sexual orientation and why he had felt such guilt when he called his best friend a fag all those years ago. And no, it wasn’t because it is a derogatory word, it was because he knew he was the pot calling the kettle black. Sasuke hadn’t lied when he said that he wasn’t attracted to Sakura, but he hadn’t said the whole truth either which was that he has never felt any type of sexual attraction towards any girl, ever.
The truth was, Sasuke liked Naruto. He liked to be near him even when he was being annoying or childish or stupid or obnoxious or any of the other adjectives Sasuke had ever used to describe his best friend. In fact he was beginning to think that it was these terrible traits that Sasuke loved best. Naruto didn’t worry about the judgement of others and did so in a way that was empowering to be around.
At least, that had been the case before Minato passed.
The change was drastic to the point it was painful to observe. Naruto was despondent at the worst of times and subdued at the best. His grades were beginning to slip, his attendance had gone to the birds, his smile lacked warmth, his step lacked peep.
It made Sasuke’s heart ache, though he would never admit to that feeling so outright. He did the only thing he could think of doing and he attached himself to the Uzumaki-Namikaze family like white on rice.
He started going over to Naruto’ house first thing in the morning and waking him up for school, forcing him to get out of bed and get dressed. He’d make breakfast for Naruto and Kushina because they both were behaving far too similar and neither were taking care of themselves. He acted like Naruto’s mother, going through his bookbag and making Naruto do his homework with him, packing him food for lunch or making sure to find spare change around the house so Naruto could buy something from the cafe. He drove him to and from school, and on days he didn’t succeed in getting Naruto out of bed before first bell he’d gather his classwork from his teachers and bring it Naruto and sit there with him and do their work together although a lot of the time Naruto would just doodle weird faces and strange looking aliens on his paper until Sasuke got frustrated with him and would walk his through doing his work. Sasuke even spent time cleaning the Uzumaki-Namikaze house. He did laundry for both Kushina and Naruto, cleaned the toilet when the ring around the bowl was so dark it was black, he did the dishes when they piled high in the sink and got to the point where he started bringing back all the frozen soup that had been stashed away in his freezer just so the two would have food.
Kushina and Naruto were falling apart and Sasuke was doing his best to keep them standing all while trying to finish off his last year of high school, find a college that didn’t cause him to go into a near panic attack with how far it was away from Naruto, and save up money from any odd and ends jobs he could fit in his schedule.
The day Sasuke’s father finds out that he only applied to the local university that was 30 minutes away and that only had a “decent” College of Business, both neighbors to the immediate sides of the Uchiha household could hear the fighting. Nothing could change his mind though, not even the scorn of his very scary father.
“Get the fuck up. Grab a bathing suit, and a change of clothes. We’re going to the beach.” Sasuke says, while violently ripping the covers away from a snoring Naruto.
“Noooooo!” Naruto’s whine was pitiful and did nothing to deter Sasuke. He started opening drawers and throwing clothes at Naruto. He might as well live in Naruto’s room, he knew were everything was. It was early, around 6am early, but the beach was almost a four hour drive and Sasuke only had 72 hours until his next shift at the clothing store and he wanted to take a vacation away from everyone else. It was also his birthday month so if need be he would guilt his friend until he agreed to his demands. When Sasuke decided what he wanted, he got what he wanted. No questions.
Graduation had only be around 2 months prior, and the fall semester was coming quick. Naruto had barely passed the 11th grade but Sasuke had a feeling this year would be better. It would be a better year or so help him God, he would beat the senses back into Naruto.
Naruto sat up in bed, clad only in a pair of boxer briefs with his hair in even worse disarray than normal and sleep in his blue eyes, to shoot Sasuke his best death glare. Sasuke wasn’t phased in the slightest, just tossed Naruto’s swim trunks on his face.
“I don’t have money for the beach.” He says, catching the trunks before they hit his face.
“I do.”
“but--”
“Shut up and pack your shit. I’m going to see if your mom needs something before we leave.” He shoves his hands into his pockets and makes for the door. Naruto sighs and looks dejectedly out the window, which just makes Sasuke even more headstrong. He will pull Naruto out of this funk if it’s the last thing he does.
Kushina, not surprisingly, is still in bed when he knocks on her door a few minutes later, a cup of steaming hot coffee in hand with a little bit of sugar, just the way she likes it. He walks up to her and pulls the covers away from her face, much gentler than how he treated her son moments ago. This had become a bit of a routine for them once Sasuke had made it his life’s mission to help Naruto and Kushina. He can tell she is losing weight rapidly, she looks pale and sickly and Sasuke doesn’t want to point it out, but it looks like her hair is starting to fall out. Something tells him there is more at work than just a broken heart, but Sasuke isn’t a doctor nor does he have any plans of ever becoming one so he lets it be.
“Kushina.” He says, loud enough that it’s not a whisper, commanding enough to cause her to open her eyes. He knows she doesn’t actually sleep as much as she tries to let on. He may be no doctor but he was a teenager and he understood how depression works. She looks up at him weakly and smiles, but it’s only the fraction of the smile he had grown to know. “I made you coffee.”
“You’re a good boy, Sasuke.” She says but makes no movements from her sheet cocoon. He places the mug on the bedside table.
“Naruto and I are going to the beach for a few days, would you like us to bring you something back?”
She nods a little, just a fraction of her normal actions and he is struck by how small she looks huddled all alone in her bed meant for two.
“The sun will do him good.” She replies but doesn’t answer his question. He didn’t expect her to, since Minato passed her temperament rarely changed. He used to ask her permission to do things but after never getting a forward response he has taken to telling her what he is doing instead.
He nods his agreement and picks up a few pieces of clothes that have been thrown on the floor and places them in her hamper. “Do you want us to do anything before we leave?”
He is only asking because his mother would have his father beat him into next week if she found out he didn’t.
“Thank you for loving my son.”
“We’ll be back on Monday.” He says as he places his hand on the doorknob. He looks back towards the bed and can only make out the top half of her head, the red hair which once used to move with a life of its own now stringy and scattered across the pillow. She isn’t looking at him, her eyes are downcast and he can tell that she is not mentally present anymore, if she was ever there to begin with at all. He closes the door behind him and leans his back against the door, letting his head rest against the wood. He controls the sigh that wants to escape his lips, he needed to stay focused in order to be the rock that Naruto needed.
It had never occurred the Sasuke how much Minato meant to his family before his death. Not that it didn’t make since that losing a spouse or a father would be detrimental, but he really didn’t spend too much time dwelling on such situations. He just rarely had been around the guy, his mother made him stay away when he was home because she felt it was rude for him to be there during the limited time the family had with the military man. It hadn’t meant much to him before, but now he was frustrated that he had missed the family bonding time because he didn’t know how to fix the gap his death has left in his best friend’s heart. Naruto aside, Naruto’s mother was withering away at an alarming rate and that scared Sasuke even more. Naruto would be a senior in high school this year, it was a critical time in his life. Every decision he made right now would directly affect his trajectory. Sasuke didn’t really care if Naruto decided to drink occasionally to numb the pain, he didn’t worry when Naruto wanted to smoke a joint to get high, or he wanted to sit at a party and watch life’s antics pass in front of him, Sasuke knew most of this was common teenager actions and most the time he would hit the joint or sip on a beer and sit with his best friend on that couch to prove with a constant presence that they weren’t alone in this life.
What he did care about was Naruto’s future. He felt the need to push Naruto towards finding something that he was interesting in doing after high school. He felt the need to encourage Naruto to see past what was happening in his home life currently. He knew Kushina had wanted this things for her son as well, he wasn’t sure where her passion had gone but he knew he would take her place if he had to in order to keep Naruto by his side.
Sasuke was turning 18 in a week or so which meant he has had Naruto in his life for almost 12 years. Giving up on this relationship would be akin to turning his back on his biological family. He was also smart enough to realize that what he felt for Naruto was more than friendship and definitely different that familial. It didn’t matter if Naruto never returned the feelings in quite the intensity that Sasuke found himself simmering in, but he knew that he meant something to Naruto therefore he would stay around as long as Naruto would allow him to.
***-***-***-***-***-***-***
The beach was crowded. They had sat in traffic for almost 30 minutes on the main road that ran parallel to the shore trying to make it to the beach house that Sasuke had booked with the help of his parents. During the four hour drive and the 30 minutes of traffic he watched the shell Naruto had built around himself slowly fall away. It had started with Naruto rolling down his window, and then slowly a sincere smile started to take over his face. About halfway there Naruto had taken over the music and eventually he had started singing along. Something that might had bothered Sasuke a year ago but it had been a long time since he had gotten to see his friend acting so carefree without the assistance of substance and he wasn’t about to ruin the mood.
When they had gotten to the strip Naruto had insisted on rolling down all the windows, bumping the music even louder, and shouting at the groups of young adults as they passed by on foot. Sasuke just put on his sunglasses and ignored the catcalling.
They pulled into the time-share, something that his father’s work connections had made possible in conjunction with the agreement that Sasuke would pay for half the stay and not ask for anything else for his birthday, and parked underneath the stilted house. They weren’t beach front, the house was on the opposite side of the road, and it was very small, only a two bedroom, but it was perfect and watching Naruto bounce out of the car in excitement made the price tag completely worth it. Sasuke may or may not had gone into his Move-Out Funds he had been saving since he was 12 to afford his half, and if he did he would never tell a soul.
Sasuke claimed one room and Naruto the other, both agreeing that they would join the walking masses to scope out what they would be doing for their weekend get-away. They found the amusement park-like attraction and decided they would come back at night to ride the rides. They walked the beach and even sat in the sand for a minute, watching the tide as it ebbed and flowed. Naruto got them pulled into a game of beach volleyball which had taken up way more time then they intended, and left them both sweaty and sandy, neither of which Sasuke felt the need to complain about, especially when Naruto ran to the shore and dove in in all his carefree glory. Sasuke watched for a moment as the blonde popped back up to the surface and shook the water from his hair, laughing in a manner that had Sasuke’s stomach twisting. It had been too long since he had heard that sound and he wanted to bottle it along with a handful of sand from the beach so he could never forget this moment.
Instead he ran into the water and tackled his friend, initiating a wrestling match that left them both with salty mouths, winded, and high on life.
The next day is spent much the same, they visited the touristy shops and Naruto bought his mother a large shell and a tee-shirt. They ate ice cream and Sasuke paid to have their likeness turned into caricatures. The artist nailed Naruto’s grin and Sasuke’s scowl. Sasuke pretended not to notice the wink the artist gave him when they turned to leave.
When night fell they went to the theme park and paid the small entrance fee. They stood in line for all the rollercoasters and even waited their turn in the extra-long line for the sling shot. Naruto won in a stuffed animal in the Ring Toss game and promptly chose a grumpy looking stuffed cat in which he turned around and gave to Sasuke.
“Look! It looks like you!” Naruto laughs hard at the glare he receives. Sasuke snatches the stuff animal anyway and rubs his thumb against the seams on its face, tracing the harsh brow.
“Idiot.” He gruffly told the cat, then adds before Naruto could respond, “Let’s ride the Ferris Wheel then head back to the house.”
They got into the short line that was moving quickly. Sasuke found it funny how people loved the more extreme rides but not nearly as many could stomach the Ferris Wheel. He wanted to sit up on top of the ride and soak in the view with Naruto.
They climb into the cabin when it’s their turn and the attendant closed the door behind them and they begin their backwards ascend. Naruto is gasping and pointing out all the bright lights surrounding them, causing the basket to swing back and forth in a manner that would probably give anyone else seasickness. All it did to Sasuke was cause him to want to vomit words he had been holding in for years. Instead he jabs Naruto in the ribs. “You’re such a child.”
Naruto laughs and attempts to rough up Sasuke’s hair. “It’s a good that I am since you act like such an old man!”
They push and shove at each other, ignoring the space between their bodies, trying to be the one who comes out on top in their wrestling match. The cabin is swinging violently at this point and they are parked at the top of the wheel when Naruto finally ends up on top of Sasuke, both of them at a stalemate with hands clasping wrists, faces far to close.
Sasuke swallows and forces his eyes from Naruto’s mouth to his eyes. He had every intention of telling Naruto to get off him but he catches Naruto’s glaze and realizes the other boy isn’t looking up at him either. He licks his lips nervously and attempts to tell Naruto how big of an idiot he is. It happens before he can get the first syllable out, Naruto watches his lip run the length of his bottom lip, watches the way his top row of teeth scrap it, and then Sasuke sees the flicker of hungry that crosses his best friend’s face before suddenly their mouths are crushed together in a bruising kiss that speaks of bold desperation.
In milliseconds Sasuke is reacting, he frees his hands from Naruto’s grasp and is pulling the other boy closer, threaded his fingers through his hair and holding on with barely contained control. Much like they have always wrestled for dominance in their friendship, they wrestled their tongues and teeth in an attempt to governor the kiss. Neither register the movement of the Ferris Wheel again until their cabin door is opened then quickly shut with a gasped, “Oh! Another round it is then!”
It only causes a brief pause in their kiss, both boys not even looking away from each other as the wheel begins to ascend again. Their faces are red, both are showing the effects of beard burn around their lips as their stubble scratches at the sensitive skin. It’s hard to say who starts the next make out session, they both pulled each other in and connected with open lips. All thoughts of anything beyond the feel of each other’s mouths seemed to be completely lost.
Although they allowed themselves to finally feed into a passion that neither had addressed until that moment, both kept their hands from wondering too suggestively. Finger’s traces cheek bones and shoulders, lips caressed earlobes and tongues licked at pulses located right below shallow skin.
This was more than Sasuke had ever intended this trip on being, and he couldn’t be happier with the outcome.
For the first time since they had arrived at the beach, Naruto was silence as they left the theme park and made their way back to the small beach house. They walk a little bit closer than normal, arms occasionally rubbing as they swung at their sides, the stuffed cat stuffed in the crook of Sasuke’s other arm. He can tell Naruto is deep in thought, although all of Sasuke’s have been wiped away by their unexpected activities on the Ferris Wheel. He allows Naruto his moment to organize himself and continues on, allowing his presence at Naruto’s side to speak for itself.
When Naruto stops walking, he grabs Sasuke’s hand in his. They both look down, Naruto seemingly surprised at his action and Sasuke staring blankly, trying not to allow his emotions to wash over his face. Naruto appeared ready to run away, struck like a deer by headlights, like any movement would spook him.
“Sasuke. I need to tell you something.”
Sasuke allows himself to sigh loudly and rolls his eyes. “You don—”
“No, it’s not about…” Naruto’s eye shift around but he doesn’t let go of Sasuke’s hand. “I’m not talking about earlier.”
Naruto looks Sasuke square in the face, any feeling of hesitation gone. “I don’t regret that. I’ve been wanting to do that for a while now.”
Sasuke nods but doesn’t speak. He changes the grasp on his hand and threads their fingers together. Whatever Naruto needed, he would give him.
“There is something I wanted to tell you but I never got to, and then all that stuff happened with dad and it just…Before dad…before my dad passed, we found out…” Sasuke watches as Naruto’s face starts to crumble and tries to understand the babbling stumbling out his lips. The lines between Naruto’s eyes start pinching together and his lips curl in an attempt to keep his composure but tears are already betraying him. “Dad was coming home because mom was diagnosed with cancer.”
The shock must be clear on Sasuke’s face, he opens his mouth to say something, say anything, but Naruto doesn’t give him the time.
“She is refusing treatment.” The tears are falling in rivers down Naruto’s face and he has to wipe his nose on his shoulder to catch some of the snot that is threatening to dribble out. “I just…you’ve been so much help Sasuke. I don’t know what…”
Sasuke pulls Naruto into his arms, his body betraying his brain again. He wraps one arm around Naruto’s shoulders and puts his other on the back of his head. He lowers his head and buries it into Naruto’s neck. He has to take a few deep breaths to center himself, as things he did not mention started making sense.
Kushina wasn’t just heartbroken, she wasn’t just depressed, and she wasn’t just falling apart. She was dying, and she was allowing it to slowly eat away at her body. She had given up and unknowingly Sasuke had been assisting her, permitting her to give up while he picked up the pieces that were shattering everywhere.
He began to shake with anger. He whispers in Naruto’s ear, “We are not meant to contain the sadness of this world.”
He takes another deep breath and smells the salt on Naruto’s skin. “I won’t ever leave you.”
Christmas greets them that year with 6 inches of snow that was swept in from the mountains to the west. Sasuke helps Naruto make Kushina’s favorite soup, butternut Squash bisque, and she drinks it through a straw, slowly.
It’s painful to watch her opt out of treatment. It’s a fight that Naruto had been battling silently but now Sasuke had taken a stand in as well, to no avail. So they do the best they can to ease her pain, keeping her medicated. Naruto and Sasuke are both busy with school and work but now that the secret was out of the bag, Mikoto, a nurse in her former life before becoming a house wife, was helping her ailing friend.
Neither of them cared much for Christmas. Sasuke was raised in a non-religious family much preferred the stories of Krampus to stories of Saint Nicholas and Naruto, having lost his father the previous year around the same time, found it hard to feel warmth from the holiday. But they found warm within each other, a bond that had been created over a decade ago over childish competition and bad cooking. Somehow, regardless of the pain that Naruto felt in the inevitable loss of both his parents and regardless of the hollow cheer this holiday attempted to muster with all the singing and bright lights, he found his true joy in the moody, sometimes rude, and mostly standoffish-- oddly dedicated and caring-- boy that had entered into his life over a decade ago.
He would be alright trying to figure it out as long as he had Sasuke by his side.