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Oh lord, this was bad. Very, very bad. This was exactly why royalty traveled with a small army in most cases. And yes, she was royalty. Princess Feferi Peixes, of the noble kingdom Derse! Daughter of Candace Peixes the Second. Sister of Meenah Peixes, also known as “The Flame Tempered Will” in Noble circles, and “Stabby bitch who is obsessed with tridents” in the fearful peasant circles. Mother favoured her older sister, of course, but Feferi had always tried to curry her favour. No, that was too political. She always just wanted her mother to love her, or treat her with basic respect. At all points, she was turned down and insulted. But she was quite stubborn. It was three days before that Mother had given her a chance to prove her diplomatic abilities-She was to go on a “Secret” mission to the principality of Prospit, to discuss some form of treaty. As part of this secret mission, she would have a security detail of two soldiers, and also would not be allowed to tell anyone, and also travel the most dangerous “Road” in the kingdom. This particular stretch of slightly less grassy dirt was filled with rocks, loose soil that formed mud in as much as a light drizzle, and cut through the Dark Forests of Kal’massis.
So why was she surprised when a massive ogre knocked the entire damn carriage over? Well, the obvious reason: A massive ogre she didn’t see coming knocked the enclosed box on wheels she was sitting on over and she wasn’t prepared. Feferi opened the formerly left hand, currently above head door and peeked out. She saw the hunched form of the ogre, skin dark gray and covered in scars, leaning over one of the horses and making very, very loud chewing noises. The other horse bolted back towards the city, as her two soldiers (Not even knights) tried to find an opening. Where was the driver?
Oh. The driver was that corpse impaled on a treebranch.
Feferi barely kept from vomiting, and had to try twice as hard when she heard the soldiers scream. Their names-She never learned their names, and that was almost as sad to her as the fact that she was going to die terrified and alone because her mother liked her sister better. A thought in the back of her head shifted the sadness to anger. Her Mother. She wanted this! She knew this was going to happen!
Feferi was shocked from her thoughts by the creaking of ornately carved wood under a massive weight. She felt as if she could hear the entire world in that moment. The gurgling, rancid breath of the beast...the dripping of drool and blood onto the door, the quickening breath of a predator who has discovered another morsel of meat in his kill. The-
The pained roaring of an ogre?
A...cat?
And a girl shouting in the most archaic Prospitian she had ever heard?
What.
The carriage creaked again, shifting as the weight was taken off of it. Yes, there was a fight. What was fighting? Feferi pushed the door open again, looking out. A little ways down the road, the Ogre was flailing, attempting to strike two figures. One was a small girl, wielding two sets of gauntlets, claws attached to her fingers made from a shining blue metal. Other than that, she wore only an Azure pelt of some beast and two fairly sized straps of cloth. The sight brought something of a blush to Feferi’s face. The second figure was a goddamn cat the size of a horse.
What the fuck.
From what she could understand, the girl was taunting the Ogre.
“You thought you could get away?! I am Queen of the forests! I shall rend thee in twain!”
Was she where the scars came from? Feferi started to climb out further, hefting herself up and slowly pulling her large dress with her. She watched in awe as the two danced around the behemoth, slashing and cutting without missing a beat. Eventually, it fell, its throat opened by a cut from the girl.
“I AM THE QUEEN OF THE FORESTS!” She shouted, pumping her hands up. Her feline companion rubbed against her, purring loudly.
Feferi cleared her throat, trying to match her speech. “Hail, noble huntress! You have saved my life with thine bravery, and I must thank thee appropriately.” She stepped to the side of the carriage, hopping down and stumbling on her dress. Wonderful, she was clumsy as well as danger-prone.
She felt two rough hands help her up, and found herself face to face with the so-called Queen. Her face was nothing like what she had been taught was beautiful, but she couldn’t stop staring into her eyes. There was a primal beauty…
“You good?” The shift in tone from her previous decorum was slightly shocking.
“U-Uhm. Yes. Please give me your hand.”
The girl turned her head slightly, like a confused animal. “Why?”
“So I can properly thank you!”
“Oh! Oh, yeah.”
Feferi took her hand in her own, surprised at the calloused feel. She brought it to her lips, gently placing a kiss on the back of her hand. When she looked up, the huntress was blushing.
“What is your name?”
“I’m Nepeta. Did...were you listening when I was fighting the big guy?”
“You were shouting very loudly, Nepeta. Your grammar was impeccable, if a little archaic.”
The girl’s blush spread, and she started laughing nervously. Feferi felt an intense need to make her do both of those things more.
“I was heading to Prospit. May you...escort me?”
“I’d love that!! I mean-Yes.” Nepeta seemed embarrassed by how excited she had been. Feferi reached out and took her hand again, smiling brightly.
“I’d love it too.”
-15 Years Later-
“My queens! My queens-” The aide skidded to a stop, fumbling through a pile of papers he held in his arms. “My q-”
Feferi grabbed the small man by the shoulders, laughing as she lifted him up and sat him down on the table. He was holding so much that his sight was blocked, even to the toned figure of the Queen-To-Derse of the United Kingdom Skaia.
“What is it, young man?”
“Th-The Lord English of Feltsmire has requested a meeting and also a lot, lot, lot of other stuff-U-Uhm.”
Feferi giggled, patting his head. “Do not worry. We’ll deal with Tibor English yet. Relax.”
“B-But where’s Queen Leijon?”
“Oh, she’s...hunting.” Feferi looked out the large window of the main hall, sighing. “Queen-To-Prospit, and she still finds the need to hunt dinner herself. She should have caught something by now-Send word to Meenah and our guest, Lord Strider. He tells some amazing stories, even if they do contain some confusing…”
“Everything, my lady.”
“Some confusing everything. They’re still very engaging.”
“Yes, quite. May I get off the table?”
“Yes.”
As the Aide ran off, she vaguely remembered his name. CD? He was training under one of the court alchemists in explosives. Smelt of gunpowder. CD, Gunpowder...she really should’ve learned his name already.
“I’m back!!” Feferi turned, smiling brightly. Nepeta held on her shoulders the carcass of a stag, hefted on the muscles she had gained through years of hunting in those same forests. She was accompanied by her aging feline friend, the albino dire-cat known as Ponce. The feline yawned, padding over to her pile of pillows to lounge.
“Just one stag, my dear?”
“I hunted this one with one hand tied behind my back. I started feeling bad at one point, y’know?”
“Oh, of course.” They shared a quick laugh. Feferi kissed her wife on the cheek, before letting her head to the kitchen to get the meat prepared.
She was very glad about that ogre attack. Still sad about the soldiers and driver and that poor, poor horse, but still.