Work Text:
Sherlock sat comfortably in his train seat, watching in amusement at John, who was leaning over the table, eyes fixed on The Sun newspaper, chewing a pen agitatedly.
The heavy October rain was pelting the window, obscuring the view from what would have been quite a pleasant countryside. Instead, there was just a grey blur, very much like the current state of Mrs Hudson's hair (though of course Sherlock was to blame for the majority of those grey hairs).
Sherlock watched, stifling laughter, as John fidgeted and swore under his breath, muttering something about a covered dish and things squirrels eat.
"Poor John," he thought "Succumbed to the secret identities of a casserole and an acorn."
John took a deep breath in, then blew it upwards, ruffling the hair on his slightly damp forehead. The train thundered on, rain still spattering the windows.
Sherlock allowed John to suffer for a further 6 and a half minutes, before he permitted himself to intervene.
"Are you alright there John?"
"Shhhh!"
"John?"
"I'm thinking!" John hissed.
Sherlock chuckled. He had already figured out the entire crossword in the time that John had taken to figure out 1 across. And that was with reading upside down.
At this point Sherlock's inner antagonist began to come out. He started tapping his fingers on the table, humming tunelessly, "accidentally" kicking John under the table. Watching John's frustration grow was just almost too much for Sherlock to quietly handle.
"Hmmm, I wonder if this is how Moriarty feels." Sherlock thought, allowing his mind to wonder for a second, thinking of the whereabouts of Jim Moriarty.
"Oh for fuck's sake!" John cried aloud, slamming his pen on the table and forcing himself away from the crossword. A few rows behind, and old lady tutted.
"Problem?" Sherlock smirked.
"I can't do it Sherlock, I can't fucking do it!" John's nostrils were flaring, and there was a flush of scarlet in his cheeks.
The old lady sighed.
"Here, let me see." This would be the height of amusement, seeing John's reaction as Sherlock solved it in seconds. Because he already figured out the answers. "Oh really John?" Sherlock glaced up with a smirk. "18 across - 'a covered dish', which is clearly a casserole, as the start of the word is 'C', and the end is 'E', and you generally cover a casserole while it cooks. And as for 16 down - 'Squirrels eat these'. Well that is obviously acorns, John. Honestly."
Filling in the answers, Sherlock slid the newspaper back towards John, who gaped at his companion.
"How?!" John gasped.
Sherlock gave him 'the look', and went back to looking out into the grey abyss.