Chapter Text
Sharpness was walking slowly while drinking a white Monster across the green campus of Strength University. Today he woke up early so he could get to his classes on time. His first class was with Ms. Carter. Hah, she was a hiplet who barely made it to Sub5. That’s why she didn’t have a boyfriend, who would anyone want a hiplet if not just as a friend? Hahah.
He arrived at the main hallway, packed with people. Sharpness was humming a song he didn’t even know what it was. He was walking, bobbing his head to the rhythm of the song he was humming, pointing every now and then at any student who passed by and muttering their tier.
“Itn”
“Htb”
“Mtn”
“True eve”
Wait...True eve?! Sharpness didn’t even realize who he had rated as true eve, since he had so much practice that he did it with just a one-second glance. He looked around for that true eve, but he didn’t see any among that whole crowd of foids and moids.
Sharpness let out a long sigh and brought his hand to his face —“Oh my god I lost the chance to rizz a true eve for being distracted.” He finished his Monster and threw it in a nearby trash can.
A few minutes later. He sat down at his desk next to his friend, Flowtives. A high-htn, not bad.
“How you doing bro” Flowtives gave him a fist bump while greeting him.
“Pretty good, although a bit disappointed, I saw a true eve in the hallways earlier, but I didn’t have time to ask for her number and I don’t even know who she is.”
“Bro I already told you to drop all that looksmaxxing stuff, you sound like a loser saying that bullshit, you’ll never get a girlfriend like that.” Flowtives frowned and pinched the bridge of his nose. Months ago, Sharpness started using reddit and twitter and he hasn’t stopped saying stupid things about ‘how superficial women are’ and ‘blackpill’.
“Hey that’s not bullshit! That stuff is really serious and it could change someone’s life. It changed the way I see the world, you should learn it too. Besides, yeah, I’m a loser. But I like it. That way no foid who’s only interested in money and looks will come near me.”
“You learned to be a complete asshole, and being a loser isn’t a compliment, just so you know.”
The conversation ended there, because Ms. Carter arrived a few seconds later, leaving Sharpness unable to respond to Flowtives insults.
Next to the teacher, there was a new student.
She had gorgeous violet-blue hair that matched the magenta streaks at the tips, pinkish-red eyes that could kill anyone with that look, her cinnamon-toned skin was adorned with little freckles on her cheeks. She was wearing a violet hoodie with bunny ears and some baggy black pants.
There he was. The true eve he had seen earlier!
Sharpness felt his cheeks heat up and turn a light pink. Holy shit… He’d never seen a true eve in person… Could this girl be the Ramona Flowers to his Scott Pilgrim?
“Pssst pssst Flow, look, that’s the true eve I saw earlier!”
"True eve? Didn’t you mean true adam?” There was pure confusion in Flowtives voice.
«Shit, from hearing so much of his looksmaxxing nonsense I’ve memorized the categories.» Thought the guy with the white cap.
“What? No way, it’s a girl, look at her, are you blind?”
—"Good morning everyone. Today we have a new student who recently transferred here, please introduce yourself, Jude.”
Jude… what a pretty name. He could already see his future with her future. Jude Conexion, it fits perfectly.
—“Uh hi, my name is Jude Low, I’m from around here, I like making jokes and minecraft I guess. Nice to meet all of you and well I can’t think of any cheesy speech so…” The teacher nodded, indicating for him to take a seat at any empty desk.
Wow, what a masculine and pretty voice. Wait, masculine? Sharpness eyes went wide and he turned his head back, looking at Jude, sitting at her desk.
—“Flow what the fuck, that’s a guy!” Sharpness tried to be discreet, but it came out more like a yell-whisper than a murmur.
“See, I told you idiot, who’s blind now?”
Prominent Adam’s apple, sharp jawline, broad shoulders…
The true eve he saw earlier was a femboy?!
Sharpness looked forward again, lay down on his desk and hid his head between his arms.
How could she be a man? She had soft features like a woman’s, big eyes like a woman’s, she didn’t have much muscle, but she had a good, defined figure like a woman’s…
I-I mean he, not she.
“Holy shit Flow… I’ve fallen in love with a femboy.”
“What the hell are you talking about? He’s not even feminine bro, he’s just a pretty guy. Bro you haven’t even met him, how are you gonna fall in love like that?”
“Don’t call her pretty. I’ve already decided, he’s mine so don’t you dare touch a hair on him. And besides don’t judge how I fall in love with people. I know how to judge my own feelings. My soul is connected to his, for sure, my instinct never fails, he’s my manic pixie dream girl. Well, boy.”
Well, at least this way Sharpness wouldn’t have to talk to a female, he could rizz JudeLow without having to worry that she’d be an unbearable emotional bitch, because he was a man.
The class went on as usual, except he kept turning around every now and then to look at the violet-haired boy. At the end of class, when almost everyone had left, Ms. Carter asked Sharpness if he could give Jude a quick tour of the campus facilities, and Sharpness happily agreed.
Sharpness was walking through the hallways with Jude, who was walking behind him, looking at every wall and locker with curiosity. There was an awkward silence that neither of them had bothered to break. Sharpness was sweating from his forehead out of nerves. How would he start a conversation with a true eve? Well, with a true adam actually, but that didn’t matter, have courage Sharpness.
Then he remembered Scott’s lines when he met Ramona. Oh it was perfect, he was saving them to say to a femcel, but this was better than a femcel.
—“Hey!” Judelow stopped looking at the undecorated walls of the hallway and turned his gaze to the blonde —"Do you know Sonic the Hedgehog? You probably know this, but in the 90s there were two Sonic cartoons airing at the same time!” Sharpness said, with his forehead covered in sweat
—"Okay and why are you telling me that?" Judelow chuckled sarcastically. —"Yknow, you're such a loser for trying to rizz me with such a losercore line” Judelow chuckled sarcastically"
Fuck. His plan to rizz him went wrong.
And the most embarrassing part was that he knew that line from Scott Pilgrim. Well, how wouldn’t he have seen Scott Pilgrim? He was a femboy.
“I wasn’t trying to rizz you, I just wanted to start a conversation.”
“Sure, with the line Scott used on Ramona?”
“Uh… Who are those people?”
“Bro you have a pin on your backpack that says Scott Pilgrim vs The World.”
“Yeah uh sorry I larp that movie or series whatever uhh I don’t know what it is.”
JudeLow rolled his eyes, he slowly walked up to Sharpness and started circling around him, like a wolf analyzing its prey. Sharpness felt all his muscles tense, trying to stay as still as possible. He was too close. So close that, if he wanted, he could count every single freckle painted around his cheeks.
Jude stepped back with a little hop. And wrinkled his nose, he looked… annoyed?
But that only made her look cuter.
“Youre an incel who’s proud of it, aren’t you?”
“Uh maybe… H-how did you know?” Sharpness blushed with embarrassment, how did she guess so fast? Was it that obvious? He just had to pray that he was Jude’s type.
“You smell like Monster, you’re wearing a Weezer hoodie, you have an evangelion pin on your backpack and I heard you ranking people’s looks in the hallway. You mistook me for a girl and called me a femboy afterwards.”
“Hey b-but that doesn’t mean anything!”
“You just admitted it right here.”
Sharpness turned around and covered his face with his hands. Holy shit, he wished the ground would open up at his feet and swallow him right now. His crush heard him call him femboy, what the hell is he gonna think of Sharpness?
“Okay but like, don’t you think I’m really handsome? I mean give me a chance to get to know you at least, right?”
— “Sure, fine, I guess.” Jude flashed a smile, not one of joy but of something he couldn’t explain. It was weird. — “But when you find out what I’m really like, don’t chicken out. Someone should teach you how to tell reality from fiction. And since no one is willing to help you stop being a loser, I will. Here’s my number, text me whenever you want.”
Jude took a small note out of his pocket and held out his arm, handing it to Sharpness. On it was his number.
“Thanks. I promise you won’t regret it my pretty girl.”
“Pretty boy** And i hope not. My next class starts soon, see you Sharp.” He said as he turned in the opposite direction from Sharpness, waving goodbye.
“Bye Judey!” The blonde watched him leave with a dumb smile on his face.
Wait, what did Jude mean by that last thing he said? Why would Sharpness chicken out when he got to know Jude better? It was obvious he was a great guy. He came to the conclusion that his dear femboy probably just had self-esteem issues and thought that about himself. And why did Jude know Sharpness name? He hadn’t mentioned his name even once.
What a weird and different guy… She was totally his type!