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To Grieve Belief

Summary:

Hummer5718 is a real person living a real life. He found out the Leviathan he'd been searching for constantly for around half a year does not exist. He was wrong.

A month later, A YouTuber called 'Wifies' posts a video called 'The Search For The Leviathan.'

Hummer hits play, and watches all 1 hour, 28 minutes, and 5 seconds.

Notes:

im so so embarassed i legitimately didn't expect to write a whole THING but ive been so obsessed over them and im reading every single fic in the tag and it isnt enough so i had to write one for myself.

also! you can read this full story (when it's out) as either romantic or platonic! i know it doesnt seem like that but hummer is just really lonely so the yearning is. inevitable. i think their relationship is really special, friendship or as partners.

tbh this first chapter is a recap but i. wanted to write it. so please enjoy anyway.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: The Search for Levi

Chapter Text

Nobody told Hummer he was crazy, he simply made it a point to not place his trust in anyone too blindly. Too many people sought to uncover the mystery Levi left in his wake, but not a single one cared to ask why Levi left such a mystery behind. Obviously, Levi wanted to be found, but he didn’t want just anyone to find him. He yearned for someone to ask every question, discover every answer, all for the sake of Levi himself. Not because of monetization, or publication, but because someone cared to know the truth.

That was the truth Hummer believed in.

So he operated in that manner. That was the one key difference between himself and everyone else investigating the Leviathan. There were a few people who thought they saw Levi, but very quickly, it became obvious how many people were simply seeing signs that Levi would never leave behind so thoughtlessly. No, Levi would never let its tail hang behind. Levi wants to be found. To feel seen. It wouldn’t be a mistake.

There were a few who claimed that they’d seen something, but the visuals were always out of place. The screenshots never captured what they’d seen. It wasn’t that Hummer didn’t believe them, but the posts they made captured the exact reason why Hummer disliked their approach. Levi wants to be seen, not through the eyes of a camera or a screenshot, but through a real person’s eyes and with the watchful gaze of the curious, the caring, the compassionate.

Then, those who simply lied or modded their game just to have the viewership and to be noticed. Those people used Levi to get ahead - Hummer despised those people the most.

All of this made Hummer wonder - did anyone care about Levi as much as he did?

It wasn’t like Hummer was obsessed with the sea creature. Well, perhaps he was, but only because no one else seemed to care about him.

Arronax was the biggest name he could find who researched the Leviathan as thoroughly as himself. Unfortunately, she became instantaneously untrustworthy when she decided to make a museum of all things, turning Levi into some form of entertainment rather than someone to be loved and cherished.

Hummer wouldn’t enjoy it if he was trying to form connections with society and society turned his visage into a circus. Would she enjoy anyone else doing that to her?

Selfish. All selfish.

He supposed he succumbed to the forums as well, claiming to have spotted the Leviathan, claiming to be in search of him for the same reasons as everyone else. But it was for different reasons.

For one, he knew he was lying. Completely lying about the whole charade. It wasn’t technically a fake screenshot - he did, in fact, take it - but he did adjust it slightly. Anyone who cared to read through all of the Reddit posts would know and see things the way he did. Would catch on that his screenshot was tampered with.

He wanted. no, needed someone to see Levi the same way he did.

It was something he thoughtlessly posted, outraged at the way the world treated Levi.

He didn’t expect anyone to actually contact him.


Two months after that split-second decision, he received an email from a stranger.

Leviathan Inquiry

Hi!

I came across your report about the Leviathan from a few months ago on reddit, and was wondering if I could ask you a few questions about it for a YouTube investigation video I’m making on the Leviathan.

If you have an hour or so sometime in the next few weeks I would really appreciate it.

Let me know,

Best,

Wifies

Hummer was confused at first. Who was this? A YouTube investigation? They must have been a journalist.

Ah, Hummer clicked his tongue. Someone who only cared about Levi for monetary reasons. Just like everyone else. The usual.

He supposed he should give this Wifies character a little bit of credit. They seemed to have read through his full ‘report’ on the situation, as they put it. He read through, found he doesn’t respond to DMs, and took the time to actually email him about the Leviathan.

Perhaps this person cared more about Levi than he first thought.

He responded tactfully, cleared up his already lacking schedule for the night, and clicked send.

Leviathan Inquiry

Hello Wifies.

I’d be willing to talk for 30 minutes. Please join this IP address at 5PM GMT with voice chat mod.

You know the version, you know the coordinates.

Yours,

Hummer5718

And he waited.


“Why’d you fake it?”

Hummer was too glad his in-game avatar was completely different from his real-life counterpart, because a mixture of emotions came to him in a strong wave. Confusion and shock, more specifically.

“Sorry?”

“Why’d you fake your screenshot?”

Elation and glee, as well, but he refused to let it show in his voice or even his face, even if they were talking over voice chat and not in-person.

Wifies - and god, was that name sending a wave of admiration down his spine despite just meeting him a few minutes ago - started to explain that if Hummer had nothing of value to offer, he would continue his investigation on his own.

Hummer could not have that, not when they’ve just met.

Not when Hummer just met someone that might be able to understand.


Hummer showed him every book in his library. Every report, every piece of evidence, every link, everything about Levi that he’d been able to find within the past six months. All 689 reports.

He was excited to see how impressed Wifies was. Despite being ready to leave just a few moments ago, Wifies was back in on the investigation, and Hummer was more than willing to let him use the same research Hummer himself had been putting together for years. After all, there was no one more dedicated to the Leviathan than Hummer, but Wifies had been researching just as deeply and thoroughly as he had been. Wifies may be just as dedicated to the investigation, especially if he was telling the truth about the whole YouTube investigation thing. Perhaps he created videos because these stories were something Wifies cherished just as much as Hummer did.

Goodness, maybe he should look at these videos himself!

The more they spoke, the more Hummer felt himself become more giddy - Wifies was genuinely willing to work with him in finding the Leviathan. He did not seem as enamored, clearly this was just another mystery to him, but Hummer knew with the right information, with the right incentive, he could convince him that Levi was worth more than just any video that he could script and write.

The Leviathan was worth cherishing.


Hummer brought him to his ship - the place Hummer had practically been living for the past six months. Wifies never snooped more than Hummer allowed, never even read the book on the lectern. He was grateful for such thoughtfulness from someone who was meant to be a journalist of sorts.

Then, Hummer told him about his idea. The water breathing potions, lasting for eight minutes each. He sent Wifies down to investigate and waited patiently for his arrival once more.

Though, after just a few minutes of Wifie’s disappearance, Hummer had an idea that he never tried before with someone other than himself - drowning.

In some of the screenshots, Wifies noticed how several people were at one or half a heart while drowning and underwater. These were the screenshots which simply depicted the long and vast ocean, but given this connection, Hummer thought that maybe, this would be the way to summon Levi. To tell Levi, in the best way they could, that they cared, that they were searching for Levi to love and adore him. To not judge the visions or the physical appearance of Levi when he finally appeared to them.

Hummer brought up the elevator, and waited patiently.


“...I just ended up drowning, why did you pull it early? I just died for like, no reason.”

Hummer explained his theory.

To find the Leviathan is to believe in him.

Wifies told him directly that he does not believe the Leviathan cares about how we find him.

That’s… a little devastating, to be frank. A little absurd, mostly. He and Wifies were of the same mind, searching for the Leviathan, knowing that they will be able to find it. But it seems like he was mistaken.

Wifies did not believe in the Leviathan, per se. He believed in the Leviathan, but not as its own being. Instead, he saw Levi as a bug. An accident. Something that was never to be believed in beyond the logical facts. Fiction, if beyond the facts,

Hummer was disappointed, but he still understood that Wifies was the only one who cared beyond simply opening and shutting the case. He knew that Wifies wouldn’t stop looking until there were no more leads to follow, and only then would he end the story.

So Hummer put his faith in Wifies’ ability to continue the story.

He told Wifies about Arronax.

Then, Wifies wanted to go to her server, and invited Hummer to come along and show him around.

Begrudgingly, and do note that he does not use that word lightly, he goes.


Wifies is enthralled by the museum.

Hummer hates every moment that Wifies eyes aren’t on him.

When they are, briefly, Hummer feels his body warm.

But the note blocks, they continue to slander and defile Levi’s name.

He still allows himself that warmth when Wifies chooses to listen to Hummer over Arronax.

He feels seen. Cherished.

When Wifies looks away, Hummer gets lost in his thoughts once more.


Wifies wants to continue his research before fully agreeing with Arronax, despite all of the evidence.

“I don’t like most of this place, but there is one thing that is impressive. Do you want to see it?”

“Yeah, sure. I’d love to.”

Hummer laughs, and starts running, checking behind only once or twice, now, just knowing that he’s following rather than suspecting he’d fallen behind.

Wifies has not once fallen behind. He’s always followed Hummer faithfully.

The warmth is infectious, because he can see Wifies’ excitement as well, knowing that if something impresses Hummer, then it must be something great.


“Holy crap… Wait, this is actually sick!”

Hummer laughs. “Yeah.”


They find the Nether Portal, sealed off from the rest of the museum. A way to essentially escape the museum into the real world.

They find the piston bolt in the Nether, clearly leading to another location.

They find the ocean in the negative coordinates.

They find her final scraps of information. Her builds. Her regards.

Hummer, unfortunately, could believe it. He fully believed that maybe Arronax had cared about the Leviathan as much as he and Wifies did. But, in the end, she seemed to have not believed enough. He just needed proof. Proof for himself, and for Wifies.

They were going about this correctly. He just knew it.


“This is why - this is the reason!”

He saw Wifies sift through the chests and barrels, the many potions of water breathing and night vision.

He knew Arronax didn’t believe. He knew she never did. These potions were proof of her unfaithfulness.

“That’s the reason why she couldn’t find it and we can.”


This is exactly what we did last time. This is exactly what you did on your world and I drowned. What’s the difference between that and now?”

“Now you trust me.”


It didn’t work.

There was some yelling. Not quite screaming, but it was certainly an argument.

Wifies was understandably frustrated. He lost one of the greatest surplus of resources for his research, lost access to that rare negative coordinate ocean, and… well, lost his trust of Hummer.

It was an unnecessary loss, due to Hummer’s faulty reasoning.

Then, Wifies admitted he brought a spare water breathing potion.

Hummer yelled back.

Wifies didn’t believe.

Hummer put his trust in the wrong person.

He felt so cold.


Wifies apologized moments after their argument, and brought up another point.

One more chance, one more chance to find the Leviathan.

Hummer jumped at the chance to search with Wifies one more time.

He apologized too.


It took some time, but after raiding one of the villages, almost getting murdered by the people in the village, and Wifies losing $75, they finally got ahold of the materials necessary to create the submarine.

It was an invention Hummer stole from the internet again. But, the build that he found was… incomplete. It was from an older version of Minecraft, and it lagged and broke with a lot of the changes that came with every patch.

So, in his spare time, he learned to refine the redstone build for this specific reason.

Before his own search for the Leviathan, Hummer worked as a repairman. Nothing too crazy. His paycheck was good, allowing him to spend a sufficient amount of money on his hobbies. Those hobbies didn’t include much other than playing Minecraft and scrolling through Reddit for more information. Building, redstone tips, learning to create farms for miscellaneous items… it was fun, he supposed.

Then, once the Leviathan started making its rounds around the internet, Hummer was curious.

It became a rabbit hole of false leads and potentially true reports. Then, he did more research into the lore of the Leviathan. Why did people believe it was that? A leviathan? And what was the meaning of that phrase anyway?

He learned more about the oceans, the creatures that lived under the sea. It was fun, learning what a nautilus shell was - the very same creature that he found so often in Minecraft.

So, while theorizing and going through the facts, he also spent some time fantasizing about the ocean.

Would the Leviathan feel more inclined to appear if Hummer took the time to learn about him?

So, for six months, Hummer had another hobby.

This process included him learning even more about redstone than he ever thought he would have before.

And he learned how to repair the submarine. How to build it from scratch. He could place every block from memory, as long as he had the resources.

He wasn’t expecting to share the fruits of his trial and error of this submarine with… him.

It felt special.


They were in the submarine for hours in complete silence.

Hummer saw Wifies stare out of the submarine for most of the time they shared, mouth agape in awe of the vast expanse of the ocean. Swarms of fish would pass by, following each other in large groups. They even saw a dolphin pass by, greeting them before circling one of the structures they left behind.

The submarine wasn’t exactly the most beautiful of builds, but it got the job done, and it was hard to ignore how Wifies seemed to glow under the soft luminescence of the froglights.

Hummer was enamored by the other man.

This whole time, Wifies wanted to find the Leviathan. He was willing to go to the same lengths Hummer himself hac gone, and he was willing to go on this one final adventure with Hummer.

He refused to think about when he would decide it was time to stop. To end the game, disconnect, and decide that the case was closed.

For now, he chose to enjoy this moment of serenity.

He thought about Wifies.

Aside from him being there for a YouTube video, Hummer really didn't know much about him. Other than his inquisitive nature, he didn’t know what kind of hobbies he had, or what kind of interests he had. Did he create these videos often? Was he famous?

They sat right next to each other, all by themselves. Hummer could just… ask.

“So, uh,” Hummer stumbled over his words, trying to find the best way to ask his question, “I never asked… you do this kind of thing often?”

Wifies turned to look at the screen on his head, and he could hear the chuckle that fluttered across the call. “Like… I guess so. I solve mysteries on the internet. I make videos about them.” He looked off to the side, observing the glass again, before bringing his attention back to Hummer, as if nothing else held his attention as thoroughly as Hummer did. “How about you?” He asked. “You get invested in this often? This kind of thing? Or…”

Hummer laughed, thinking about the mystery he looked into before Levi came about, the world within worlds. “Yeah, I mean, all the time. That personality I’ve got, I guess.”

Wifies stared at him, eyes softening. He understood, because he had the same personality.

The itch that you can’t help but scratch, the story that you can’t help but tell, the mystery you can’t help but solve. That was the truth between them - they shared this personality. They were kindred spirits.

Hummer wondered if when Wifies looked at him, it was like looking into a mirror for him too.

That same insatiable need for the mystery to be solved… a hunger rivaling that of the Leviathan’s itself.

…not that Levi was a glutton.

Wifies laughed again, looking back at the front of the submarine. “Do you usually set out tests and take people with you,” then, back at Hummer, the glow shining upon his eyes so beautifully once again. It was the same glimmer of curiosity he saw when he first met the man, but it held a different meaning now. Now, he was curious about Hummer himself - beyond the Leviathan, beyond the mysteries, beyond reality itself, and finished his question, “or am I the first?”

Hummer couldn’t help but laugh. Wifies really didn’t know, did he? Just how… lonely Hummer was before. Hummer didn’t realize until the museum trip either, how lonely it was being the only one searching for the Leviathan like he was. The only one he lived for on a day to day basis. Perhaps that was why he was so attached to Levi - the only other being that might see Hummer for who he was, just as he wanted to see Levi for who he was.

But now, it felt… distant. Like the Leviathan wasn’t there at all, for once. It was just the two of them in this submarine. If they truly were kindred spirits, then Wifies was probably lonely this whole time too. A heartfelt conversation that neither one of them had ever had before.

…did he investigate these mysteries alone? On his channel? Was it just him this entire time?

Hummer glanced back at Wifies, who was still looking at him with… warmth, again, and stuttered a bit. “I- Yeah, you’re... yeah. You’re the first.”

Wifies smiled, glanced down a bit almost bashfully, and turned his attention back out of the submarine. “Honored.”

He’d never seen Wifies get shy.

It was… Hummer never thought he would use the word ‘adorable’ for Wifies but… it is what it is. He had to look away, and was once more thankful that his in-game avatar didn’t display any of his emotions.

And they moved on.


This was never going to last.

Hummer knew that.

Wifies knew that.

This adventure is going to end, and their search for the Leviathan was going to come to a close.

Wifies would leave, concluding the mystery solved.

The Leviathan isn’t real.

He would create and edit the video, then he would post it.

The Leviathan isn’t real.

He would get millions of views, detailing his and Hummer’s story. Their findings, how and why they determined the Leviathan’s whereabouts, the two bugs coinciding to create an internet myth.

The Leviathan isn’t real.

The whole world will see the truth for what it is.

The Leviathan isn’t real.

Is it so wrong that Hummer disagreed? He felt it, he felt Levi. He knew Levi was real, he just… knew.

The Leviathan isn’t real.

What’s the point of all of this if Wifies had already decided hours ago that the Leviathan isn’t real? What was the point in trying to convince him when the truth had already been decided?

The Leviathan isn’t real.

The winners are the ones who write history. If Wifies decided the Leviathan wasn’t real, then

The Leviathan isn’t real.

But that couldn’t be true.

The Leviathan is real.

…what was the point of finding him if Wifies wasn’t there to find him too?

He will prove that the Leviathan is real.


“...What are you doing? What the hell are you doing?”

He shrugged. “Guess you were right. We were not really gonna find Levi in some flying machine. It’s time for us to believe.”


“I don’t know if I can believe in something that might not even exist.”

“Then believe in me.”


It felt like he was running out of breath in reality. Like he was truly dying.

It was strange, feeling as if you’re drowning, but not quite.

He let his breath go.


Hummer5718 drowned.