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The sun is shining down on Shuaibo right now, he hates it.
To him it feels like the weather is mocking him; all bright and sunny when all he feels inside right now is gloom and despair. This is not how he imagined his wedding day would be. Was it supposed to feel like this? Like you’re stuck on a lifeboat in the middle of the ocean? Like you want to escape but can’t do so without drowning? Definitely not. Every wedding Shuaibo has ever gone to has been one of love. He witnessed a close friend of his, Ma Jingxiang get married to his husband Kim Sungmin. Shuaibo remembered that day like it was yesterday. He remembers the immense joy he felt seeing one of his best friends find his soulmate, while also swallowing the feeling of loneliness inside of him. He always thought that feeling of loneliness will disappear once he gets married, but now that it’s his turn to be at the altar that feeling is still there.
The sound of the door to his bridal (um groom..al?) suite cut off Shuaibo’s train of thought. He was expecting his mother to waltz in with unshed tears and joy beaming in her eyes, but is pleasantly surprised when he sees that it’s his best friend slash best man, Woongki. Turning away from the window he was surprised to see the state his best friend was in. Woongki looked frazzled; his palms were sweaty, there was a frown on his face, and was anxiously pacing back and forth in the room. Seeing his friend in this state worried Shuaibo, and made him feel some pity for the man. Emphasis on some.
“Are you okay, Ki?” Shuaibo asks. It feels like those are the first words he uttered that day. It probably is. Choosing to isolate himself on the day of his wedding maybe wasn’t the best move. Shuaibo doesn’t remember anything that’s happened so far. He just nodded his head yes when they asked him something.
“Yes, yes I’m okay, but what about you?” Woongki replies, and his fingers fly to his styled hair before he remembers that he is not supposed to mess it up, and sighs as he lowers his fingers regrettably. “Bobo, this is so tiring. Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” Shuaibo replies brightly, shooting Woongki a smile. He gave him the brightest smile he could, but it did not reach his eyes so Woongki definitely knows he’s faking it.
“It’s time,” Woongki says solemnly, walking over to Shuaibo who has been trapped in this room all morning. Shuaibo has been sitting there patiently waiting, getting all dolled up by the makeup artist his mother hired to cover Shuaibo’s dark circles and blemishes. Woongki stared Shuaibo right in the eyes, as if he was studying his face, and Shuaibo almost felt like crumbling under the intense gaze that Woongki was giving him. Looking for any type of crack in his façade.
“Alright, Let’s go.”
-
The wedding is a lot larger than Shuaibo anticipated. It was huge. There was the press at every turn, snapping every moment so that Shuaibo would never forget his “special day,” even if he wanted to. The flowers, the celebrity guests he doesn’t even know, the altar, the priest, everything. He was shocked that they were taking pictures of every little detail. But then again, how can they not? Today just happened to be the biggest wedding of the decade. The Park and Zhang families are two of the biggest conglomerate families in both Korea and China. It’s a very big deal, and Shuaibo hated it. Shuaibo hated it because it means that he has to plaster on his perfected fake smile that he had mastered ever since he found out he would be in an arranged marriage. After all, he couldn’t let a scandal happen.
Within the past couple months since his engagement announcement there was paparazzi everywhere. If there was any crack in his façade, or if he showed any emotion other than joy, then there would be articles and smear campaigns that would target the Zhang group. He’s already gone through that once. When his family decided to open up the Korean branch of their company, Shuaibo was sent there to help get it off the ground. A couple mistranslated words from his broken Korean were taken out of context and Shuaibo was the face of quite possibly the worst hate train he has ever seen. Shuaibo refuses to go through that again. There would be speculations on whether this marriage was real. As if the people are not already suspicious of the fact that the two Asia’s most powerful group’s sons are getting married.
Despite the fact that his father was currently walking him down the aisle to one of the most important moments of adulthood, he can’t help but feel like a child. Shuaibo remembers the arguments he had with both his parents about this wedding. Why? Why him? He even almost asked why not his adopted brother Daisuke instead? His innocent, pure of heart fourteen-years-old brother before snapping himself out of it. Daisuke has his whole life ahead of him and Shuaibo will fight anyone who dares to interrupt it. He was just frustrated with everyone, and most of all himself for not standing up to his parents. He has always been a good child. Always getting good grades, always treating people with kindness. He stays out of trouble, and now they’re marrying him off to some guy in Korea who Shuaibo barely knows! All he could find out about Park Han is that he is the eldest of two in the Park family. All Shuaibo wants is answers.
But then again, the answer is clear. Money. It’s always money.
Shuaibo felt the weight of the world on his shoulder’s. The wedding guests that he never had a say in inviting, the press that annoyed every fiber of his being, his small number of friends that his parents allowed him to invite, his cousins who came all the way from China, his future husband’s family, his parents in law, his future husband. All of their eyes are on him. They’re all looking at him, so Shuaibo puts on his perfectly rehearsed smile and hopes it’s enough to convince them he’s happy. His future husband is looking at him, and Shuaibo hates himself for thinking about how attractive he looks right now.
This is the first time that Shuaibo is meeting his soon-to-be husband in person. He internally let out a sigh of relief seeing that he wasn’t ugly, or fifty-years-old. His soon-to-be husband, Park Han, was looking at him so intently as he walked down the aisle, like the universe was inside Shuaibo’s eyes, with a small smile adorning his handsome features. Any outsider looking at them right now would think that they are really in love, and not just two strangers trapped in an arranged marriage. He has to admit to himself however that Han looked really good. They were both clad in matching tailored white suits with intricate floral lace detailing to match the dreamy look of their wedding. Shuaibo himself had his long hair pulled back into a bun with delicate flowers braided into the hairstyle, while Han had his bangs pushed back and styled to frame his handsome face.
After a couple moments, which felt like an eternity to Shuaibo, they had finally reached Han at the altar. Shuaibo looked back at his father who looked like he was on the verge of tears. His father patted his arm twice before he goes to sit next to his mother, who was already crying, silently dabbing away at the tears streaming down her face.. She has been like that ever since they got to the wedding venue. Shuaibo wondered why they were crying when they were the ones who forced him to get married. This whole situation really makes him want to laugh. The wedding, the marriage, Han. This entire ordeal just feels like one really badly written K-drama.
Shocking him out of his stupor, he felt Han take his hands as they faced each other in front of the priest. Shuaibo can clearly hear the words the priest is saying, but it doesn’t feel like he is listening because Han is in front of him and his eyes are only on the shorter male; not the groomsmen behind Han's head who are all giving him sweet smiles, as if they are welcoming him into the family. Han radiates so much calmness and tranquillity that Shuaibo sort of hates it. At least Shuaibo is only putting an act up. But Han? He looks truly content with everything that is happening, maybe even happy, and he hates it. Isn’t this happening way too fast? Aren’t they just two strangers? Shouldn’t he be frustrated at being forced into an arranged marriage like Shuaibo is?
Continuing through the motions of the ceremony, Han makes the declaration to love, comfort, honour, and protect Shuaibo in sickness and in health as long as they both shall live, and Shuaibo follows suit. It sounds insane to Shuaibo because of the doubts swimming in his head. Are they really going to take care of each other? Han looked so genuine as he recited those words to Shuaibo with his twinkling eyes while Shuaibo could feel the resolve inside of him crumbling bit by bit. Shuaibo can see from the corner of his eyes that his mother has fully given up on the tissues in front of her and resorted to using his brother Daisuke’s sleeve as a handkerchief. They haven’t even gotten to the vows yet.
The vows that Shuaibo had written that morning. The vows that they both probably looked up on the internet because unlike most couples, they can’t say anything personal because they don’t know each other. They’re not two people who are in love, but two people who are forced to be together with each other just to give their families more power. Shuaibo can see that his parents are still crying, and Woongki is silently wiping his own. It’s ridiculous. Are they that great at acting? At least he knows Woongki’s tears aren’t from a place of joy, but a place of pity.
They slip the rings on each other’s ring fingers and Shuaibo’s mind flashes back to the time when he picked out their wedding bands with his mother and soon-to-be mother-in-law. He remembers Han’s mother sitting in front of him, flipping through the same catalogue, and when they got to the same page, without both of them knowing, they immediately said this one. It’s so simple. Originally just a gold band but Han’s mother insisted that they should engrave both of their initials to them. ZSB + PH. Shuaibo hates himself for thinking how perfect the rings look on both of their ring fingers. This is all fake, none of this is real, Shuaibo scolded himself.
“You are now pronounced husband and husband. You may now kiss the groom,” the priest finally says, and Shuaibo’s chest feels somewhat heavy. They're officially married and they have to kiss. They both lean in and Shuaibo feels Han hesitating for a second. He hears Han whisper a quiet I’m sorry before bringing their lips together. It should’ve been awkward, but to Shuaibo he was surprised at how right it felt. When Han kissed him, he immediately felt butterflies in his stomach. Shocked at the revelation, Shuaibo opened his eyes as they pulled away from each other, and cheers erupted through the venue. Shuaibo can see Han’s groomsmen hugging each other and his parents in law and his parents hugging and congratulating each other. He can see Daisuke giving Woongki a big hug while Woongki looks at him with pity in his eyes.
How is everyone so happy?
-
Shuaibo thinks it would be so much easier if Han had been a horrible person. At least if Han was horrible he wouldn’t have to keep up this mask, but nope! Han just had to be a great person. He is too sweet and dorky for his own good with a face carved out of stone. He doesn’t know what he expects from Han, actually. A stereotypical CEO’s son who gets everything they want? Yes. A thoughtful and caring husband with a heart of gold? Now that was a surprise.
Han might be the closest thing to an angel on earth. He is someone who would cook Shuaibo breakfast every morning and wake up him with a soft touch on Shuaibo’s shoulder, he drives Shuaibo and him to the office together when they could easily get a driver, and he tries to make conversations with Shuaibo instead of flat out ignoring him like how Shuaibo planned on doing to him. He’s nothing like anything he expected, and Shuaibo is trying so hard to find at least one thing about Han that he can hate, but he can’t find any.
It’s about a week after their wedding and Shuaibo is exhausted. They should be on their honeymoon right now. Shuaibo would kill to be at one of those exotic, all-inclusive resorts, but ever since their companies established their partnership, through marriage none the less, it has gotten even busier at work. It’s just not worth it to go on a honeymoon right now at the risk of falling behind on all this work.
It’s the weekend now, and at the insistence of both of their father’s, the newlyweds decided to take the whole weekend to relax. Shuaibo already has a plan in mind when Han drives them home. He’s going to just sprawl across the couch in the living room of their penthouse, turn on their TV, and watch anime re-runs while eating some trashy take-out. It’s supposed to be perfect, and Shuaibo is just about to choose between door-dashing Chinese and ordering pizza from the restaurant nearby when he sees Han appear at the bottom of the staircase, stopping at the last step to stare at Shuaibo.
“What?” asks Shuaibo defensively, looking at him and covering himself with a blanket. He suddenly feels insecure about how he’s dressed. Shuaibo just threw on his sweatpants and some old t-shirt from college.
“Can I join you?” Han asks him. Shuaibo takes a good look at Han and mentally curses himself. Han looks so fucking hot. He’s still in work attire. His blazer is nowhere to be found, his tie loose around his neck, and his hair dishevelled in all the best ways. Shuaibo thinks he looks ridiculously gorgeous even in this state.
“I’m just going to put on some anime, though,” Shuaibo replies weakly, biting his bottom lip. He’s not used to someone wanting to watch anime with him. His family never understood his obsession, and Woongki only wanted to watch Sailor Moon.
“So you don’t want me to join?” Han asks pointedly, his hand on his hips, and Shuaibo has the sudden urge to chuck a throw pillow at his perfectly symmetrical face.
“No,” Shuaibo scoffs, looking at Han annoyed, “I mean, I’m just going to re-watch some anime. Are you sure you want to join?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I?” Han replies stubbornly, looking at Shuaibo in determination, as if he was challenging Shuaibo.
“Then go take a shower first, I can smell you from here.” Shuaibo counters, looking away from Han to their TV, and Shuaibo hears Han’s footsteps bounding up the stairs after he cheerily says okay at Shuaibo’s request. He forgets his husband is younger than him, with how he can act like such a kid.
Fifteen minutes later, Shuaibo can hear Han running down the stairs. He looked at his husband and was surprised at his appearance. Instead of his dress slacks and button up, Han was dressed in sweatpants, and his own old college t-shirt.
“What are you wearing?” Shuaibo asked, raising an eyebrow at him. “I wanted to match! It's an old college t-shirt and sweatpants night!” Han defensively “I wanted to stay on theme.” Shuaibo suddenly regrets judging him when he saw the pout on Han’s face.
“What are we watching?” Han asks, sitting down next to Shuaibo after dimming the living room nights.
“Haikyuu,” Shuaibo answered while setting up episode one of season one.
“Hai-what?” Han asks again, and Shuaibo whips his head to Han. Han’s head is now resting on the head of the sofa, so close to Shuaibo that if he moved a little Han’s head could fall onto Shuaibo’s shoulders, and Han looked back at him innocently.
“You don’t know Haikyuu?” Shuaibo asks in disbelief. “Seriously?”
“Should I? Is it something I needed to have knowledge of before I married you?” Han asks, with a teasing smile on his face as he laughs at the look of disbelief on Shuaibo’s face. Han thinks he’s so funny that it’s irritating and endearing at the same time.
“Yeah,” Shuaibo sarcastically replied, mentally deciding to order pizza for dinner. He doesn't know if Han likes Chinese food or not, so it's probably better to pick pizza. “Guess I’ll have to divorce you.”
“Don’t joke about things like that,” Han immediately chastised him, and Shuaibo looks at Han in surprise, his mouth hanging open a little as he takes in the irritated look on Han’s face. When Han saw the shocked and little hurt expression on Shuaibo’s face, he softened his face.
“Just don’t, okay?” Han says softly, looking down, and he takes Shuaibo’s hand that rests in the little space between them, and squeezes it softly. “Don’t.”
“Okay,” Shuaibo replies, taken aback, his cheeks feeling a little warm. As he calls the pizza place to place his order, his other hand is occupied in Han’s hand. He can feel the younger gently playing with his fingers as Shuaibo orders their food.
The odd atmosphere returns to normal once their food gets delivered, and Han gets a little more talkative, making small comments about the anime, and the characters passion for volleyball. He even asks why Shuaibo would watch a Japanese show when the only languages he knows are Mandarin and Korean just to be funny, which earns him a look from Shuaibo.
Han is so odd.
Shuaibo slowly started building a file in his head filled with facts about his husband. So far what he has Han is so odd, and his husband doesn’t like to joke about divorce.
-
Click.
“Is this one okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, just take another last one, please.”
Click.
“Okay, done?”
“Yeah, yeah. Last one!”
Click.
This has been going on for about fifteen minutes now and Shuaibo hopes he isn’t tiring out Han. They’re not even in China yet. What Han had to learn after becoming Shuaibo’s husband, is that he now has the very important job of taking Shuaibo’s Instagram pictures. He can’t let down his 1.9 million followers, making sure to give them quality content
Han didn’t even have Instagram before marrying Shuaibo. He found this out when he asked for his Instagram. Shuaibo let out the most dramatic gasp at the fact. Han could only lovingly roll his eyes. Shuaibo snatched Han’s phone, before pausing to ask for his passcode. Han took his phone back and put in his passcode (He could see out of the corner of his eye that Han’s passcode was Shuaibo’s birthday, he didn't even know how Han knew his birthday) before downloading Instagram. Once the phone was back in his grasp, Shuaibo created Han’s account, complete with an aesthetic username, and bio. When he got to the part of creating a password Shuaibo passed the phone back to Han. Deciding to be nosy, Shuaibo used his height to his advantage to see what Han would put as his username. The password is their wedding date along with Han’s name. He finds Han ridiculous. As a joke Shuaibo suggested that he should change his own Instagram password with their wedding date and Shuaibo’s name so they can match, and Han readily agreed with a cheeky smile on his face as he immediately changed it for Shuaibo. Shuaibo could only look at him helplessly. They’re both ridiculous.
“Are we done yet?” Han asks for the nth time. “This is the hundredth photo, Jangshu.”
“Well maybe if you were a good photographer we would end up with a good photo,” Shuaibo countered back.
Shuaibo is currently posing for some fake candid shots at Incheon Airport, telling Han that his outfit is too good to not get pictures taken. They’re just waiting for their flight to China to board now. Shuaibo and Han’s parents insisted that they both go back to China for their honeymoon. His mother especially had begged for them to come. Saying she hasn’t seen them in forever since both his parents had to return to China after Shuaibo and Han’s wedding. Han’s parents think that they’ve been working too hard and they deserve a break after working for a month straight after their wedding. The company won’t go under if they’re gone, so they should enjoy their honeymoon.
After countless pictures, their gate finally opens, and Shuaibo quickly drags Han to immediately board the plane. This is one of those moments where Shuaibo is so grateful for the privileges in life as he sits down in first class. Shuaibo is about to close his eyes and sleep the whole way to China when Han, who is next to him, speaks up.
“Do you miss China?”
“Kinda?” Shuaibo replies, opening his eyes to peek at Han who is looking at Shuaibo like he is studying his face. He looks good right now in a black sweater with his army green bomber jacket.
“What do you mean by that?” he asks again
“Well I know it’s my home and I was born and raised there. But ever since college I’ve lived in Seoul. I moved here to manage my dad's Korean subsidiary company, and I could always go home if I ever got homesick,” Shuaibo moves in closer, whispering in Han’s ear, “but ever since marrying you and everything, I can’t go back often. I have to stay by your side, you know?”
Sensing their conversation has come to an end, Shuaibo reclined his seat hoping to finally get some sleep.
“Sorry,” Han whispered. Shuaibo sensed a sadness in his tone. Wanting to make sure he was okay, Shuaibo opened his eyes only to be greeted by Han’s eyes staring at him, big and beady, as if asking for forgiveness.
“No worries, husband,” Shuaibo jokes, planting a soft kiss on his cheek, and then pushing him down his seat, forcing him to relax. “Relax, Han. We’re okay now, aren’t we?”
“Yeah. We’re okay.”
-
As much as Shuaibo loves China, he also hates China.
The second they stepped off the plane they were hit with a wave of polluted air. Smog penetrated the air, forcing them to wear masks for their whole trip.
What’s nice however is that his parents and Daisuke took the whole week off to spend time with them, while also making sure the couple got some alone time. Shuaibo is pleasantly surprised to see that Han gets along swimmingly with Daisuke. It was sweet seeing his husband get along with his little brother, playing with him and sharing snacks. It softened something in Shuaibo’s heart towards the man. It was also great that Daisuke wanted to spend so much time with them, because it meant less time with his parents. Don’t get him wrong, Shuaibo loves his parents so much. However every time they call his parents they would ask Shuaibo and Han again and again about when they’ll be getting a grandbaby, knowing damn well that this was an arranged marriage and that Shuaibo can’t get pregnant. They’re lucky that they married Shuaibo off to a great man instead of some sleazebag.
To be honest, Shuaibo doesn’t really know where their relationship stands right now. He's pretty sure they’re friends. But they’re also married. Not to mention the small somersaults happening in his stomach whenever Han gets close to his face. So really, Shuaibo doesn’t know where they stand.
Despite all of that he was excited to be home. Shuaibo drags Han to his old elementary school and middle school in China. His old teachers were still there so he introduced Han to them as his husband in Chinese. (If Shuaibo saw a beaming smile on Han’s face when he said “husband” he chose to ignore it). I mean, it’s true. They are husbands, and their marriage was very, very, public. Shuaibo drags him to the mall Daisuke and he used to hang out whenever he picked him up after school. Even though he was being dragged left and right, Han took it all in with a fond smile on his face and a lot of pictures as Shuaibo rambled about his old life, mixing in Chinese as well when he gets a little too excited.
“Are you happy?” Han asked him one night. Shuaibo turned his head to see Han’s eyes staring back at him. The two of them are sharing a bed since Shuaibo’s parents may raise some questions if they see one of them on the floor.
“Mhm,” Shuaibo hums, he can feel Han’s presence so close it’s almost overwhelming .
“That’s good. I know this marriage is not what you wanted, but I hope you’re always happy,” comes Han’s reply.
Han is looking at him intently. He’s always doing that these days, looking at Shuaibo, staring at him as if he was the most interesting person in the world. When Shuaibo could be going on and on about his cat Shiliu, Han would be looking at him with the fond expression, paying close attention to everything he says, and chiming in with stories about his childhood cat Cookie.
“Wow, this is the sweetest pillowtalk I have ever received,” Shuaibo jokes. He wonders what made him think this. Was it what he said on the plane? Han lets out a soft chuckle, shuffling closer to Shuaibo. They’re so close now, they get even closer when Han snakes his arms around Shuaibo’s waist, pulling him closer, tucking Shuaibo’s head into the crook of his neck, near his collarbone where Han’s scent is the strongest. Even though his husband is shorter than him, Shuaibo can’t help but feel safe and secure in this position .
“Yeah, Just want to make sure you’re happy too.”
-
Shuaibo never thought he would see him again. China is big. China is huge actually, and so over-populated that Shuaibo thinks he wouldn’t even see him again on this trip. But there he is, in the same café as he is, waving at Shuaibo as if they haven’t lost contact for the last however many years he’s been in Seoul. He waltzes on over, until he stops in front of their table, to which Han raises an eyebrow at, thinking who was this stranger to Shuaibo.
“Shuaibo!”
“Jinxin,” Shuaibo returns with less enthusiasm than the man, surprise evident in his features. Shuaibo can feel the heavy presence of Han’s eyes on the back of his head.
“It’s been so long! How have you been?!” Jinxin says in Chinese. He is still looking at him, not even bothering to acknowledge Han who is looking so confused at the sudden switch of languages, a little bit irritated at this intruder.
“I’ve been fine, Jinxin. This is my husband, Park Han,” Shuaibo briefly replies, and directs Jinxin’s attention away from him and to Han, who looks pleased at the word husband again.
“Oh,” Jinxin says in surprise, and Shuaibo almost feels like laughing when Jinxin’s eyes bounce back and forth from him to Han. “You’re married?”
“Yes I am, happily” Shuaibo replies easily, because he is. No matter how his marriage started, he is still married. He is also happy, really happy actually. Shuaibo never realized just how much joy being Han’s husband brought into his life. He finally has someone willing to watch the same anime as him, someone who can take his Instagram pictures without (barely) complaining, and someone who makes him feel seen. Not seen as a CEO’s son, but as a person.
“Oh,” Jinxin says, looking defeated before he quickly brightens up, giving Shuaibo the same smile that he would die for back then. “I’m glad you’re happy. I’ll get going now. See you next time, Bobo.”
“See you around,” Shuaibo replies weakly, waving at Jinxin as he exits the café.
“No you won’t,” Han muttered under his breath, and Shuaibo shot him a look.
-
It’s their sixth day which means that it is their last day before they have to board their flight back to Korea. They both decided to just spend their day like any cheesy tourist would on vacation; walk around, take pictures, sightsee, and try new food. It was a surprise to Shuaibo on how they bumped into Jinxin the other day, but Shuaibo knew better than to bring it up unless he wanted Han to be upset.
“Hey that guy we saw the other day,” Uh oh, here we go. Shuaibo thought “Who was that?” Han asks sourly.
“Jinxin, someone I knew in high school,” Shuaibo replies carefully, studying Han’s expression
“How did you know him?” Han asked, a questioning look on his face
“Through a cousin.”
“Which cousin?”
“Oh you know, my cousin.”
“And they are…”
“The child of my Aunt.”
“And do I know this Aunt? Were they at the wedding?”
“Of course they were at the wedding! And you do know her she's...the mother of my cousin.”
“Hmm okay, it’s just that Jinxin guy seemed pretty upset when you said that you were married?” Han inquires. Shuaibo can feel his neck heating up. The onslaught of questions really made Shuaibo nervous. He starts scratching his nape, finding the sky more interesting than looking Han in the face.
“Really?”
“Mhm.”
“Right. What do you wanna do ne-“
“Who is he?” Han interrupts, and Shuaibo sighs, finally giving up.
“Fine he’s just my ex-boyfriend.” Shuaibo says with a defeated sigh
“Your WHAT?!” Han exclaimed. Shuaibo looked around the park, silently bowing his head in apology. “Lower your voice! You’re going to get the cops called on us,” Shuaibo said in a hushed but stern voice “and yes my EX-boyfriend. We dated for a couple months back in high school.”
“That’s it?” Han asks, and Shuaibo shoots him a look at the doubtful inquiry.
“Yeah? Do I need to tell you all about my past lovers? Who are you, my father?” Shuaibo shoots back, and Han rolls his eyes at him.
“No, but I'm your husband.”
“I don’t see how that relates to me having to tell you about my old relationships. You don’t even tell me about your exes!” Shuaibo argues back, a pout appearing on his lips that when Han sees it the corners of his mouth starts to go up.
“Fine, I’ll tell you all about my exes if you tell me about yours,” Han compromises, smirking at his own suggestion, and Shuaibo shoots him another look.
“What makes you think I want to know about your gross relationships?” Shuaibo asks, turning away from Han, despite knowing fully well himself that he wants to know.
“Gross past relationships,” Han corrects, and he leans forward to smirk at Shuaibo. “Don’t act like you don’t want to know, Jangshu, but you have nothing to worry about. You’re my husband okay?”
Shuaibo hates him. Shuaibo hates him because he is right. He does want to know. So he gives in, and their night in China is spent talking about all of their past relationships. It’s nice.
-
They’ve been back in Korea for about 4 days. It’s just work, work, work, and more work after China which means going to work together early in the morning, and going back late to their penthouse at night after finishing up work. The exhaustion from their work day means they’ve migrated to Han’s room and started sleeping there together where it has the comfiest bed. Sharing a bed in China changed something inside of them for good where now they can’t sleep unless the other is in their arms. Neither are complaining though, so it’s okay.
Their first kiss after the wedding happens when Shuaibo least expects it. They’re at some random bar in Itaewon on a Friday after work. Han wanted to celebrate some big contract signing at work so he dragged Shuaibo to go meet with his friends at the bar for some drinks. Shuaibo recognises them from the wedding since they were Han’s groomsmen; Jeongwoo, Steven, and his younger brother Juwon. They’re all so boisterous and loud that Shuaibo can barely keep up with the onslaught of drunken Korean coming out of their mouths, but they still make sure include him in their conversations, and tease Han for cuddling up against Shuaibo all night, clearly the most drunk one in their little group.
One moment they step outside to leave the bar, the next they’re suddenly making out in the alley behind the bar. They’re kissing now, and everything feels so wet and hot, but so right. They’re supposed to be going back to their penthouse after saying their goodbyes to Han’s friends. But somehow after Han continues to stumble around that Shuaibo can barely hold him, Shuaibo just can’t take it anymore and pushes Han up against the dirty wall outside of the bar and kisses him breathless. How could he not! Han was dressed in a pair of distressed jeans that hugged his ass perfectly, his band t-shirt had its sleeves rolled up to show off his biceps, and to top it all off he threw on his leather jacket, so really Han had it coming. It’s not so romantic for technically their first kiss, compared to the one they shared on their wedding day, that one doesn’t count, but this one does. This one does because Han is passionately kissing him back. After a couple of minutes (and Han moving lips down to Shuaibo’s neck) Shuaibo breaks them apart.
“We should stop,” Shuaibo gets out, Han resting his head on Shuaibo’s shoulder, near his collarbones where his scent is the strongest.
“Awwweee, but why?” Han slurs out.
“Because,” Shuaibo starts, but stops himself because he doesn’t know. Why should they stop?
“We’re married, Jangshuuuu,”
“I know. My Instagram password reminds me of the date every time.”
“Sooooo? why should we stop?” Han whined, and Shuaibo shuts up because he has no good response to that. They’re married. They’re not doing anything wrong. But it’s all wrong. Han is drunk, and this whole thing started out as an arrangement. They’ve never had an official first date, only their honeymoon. They’ve also never really talked about the tension between them and how things have changed after the wedding.
Shuaibo sighed, not answering Han’s question and started carrying him to their car. After seating him down in the passenger seat, Shuaibo takes a good look at Han, his cheeks are flushed from the alcohol, his lips red and swollen from their little heated kiss, and Shuaibo thinks it’s unfair how handsome he looks like this. And Han looked up at Shuaibo with a wide smile on his face. Shuaibo wants Han to stop looking at him like that. Like he’s the light of Han’s life. He’s so stupid. He tells him that. In Korean or Chinese, Shuaibo doesn’t know.
“You’re the prettiest angel on Earth,” Han drunkenly rambled. Shuaibo laughed at the Korean man as he drove them both home. “The preeettiest angel I’ve knownnn.”
“I’m so happy we're married,” Han says in his disheveled state. “I’ve wanted Jangshu hyunnng for the loonggest time, my pretty Jangshu hyunggg” that causes Shuaibo to pause. He knows Han is really, really, drunk now because they never use honorifics with each other. What does he mean by the longest time? Hoping this was just Han drunkenly rambling, Shuaibo just kept his eyes on the road and drove home.
Home. That’s funny, since when did Shuaibo refer to their penthouse as home?
-
Shuaibo expected a lot of things from this marriage. He expected Han to be having some secret affair that they have to hide from their parents and the press, he expected to hear about how they should act at work and in front of their parents to convince them they’re happy, he expected to basically be a ghost to his husband.
But he gets none of that. He gets none of that because with Han he felt seen.
There is no secret affair because Han had his eyes on Shuaibo ever since the first time he saw him, and Shuaibo is still confused on if he met Han in the past. There is no talk on how to act outside because Han genuinely likes spending time with him. There is no ghosting because Han was dedicated to sticking by Shuaibo, just like how he was in this current moment. Once they got out of the car and into their home Han was stuck to Shuaibo’s side like glue. Shuaibo thinks his husband is adorably stupid for getting this drunk.
Shuaibo is also kind of stupid because it crosses his mind that he has never felt anything other than love from Han.
He didn’t expect it, but Han and Shuaibo were just truly happy with each other, and they get along so well it’s stupid. It’s stupid that Shuaibo thinks so fondly about his parents-in-law. It’s stupid how he remembers cursing them inside his head when he first was told of their arranged marriage. It’s stupid because his parents adore Han so much that they treat him as their own son, and Han adores them. They have nothing to put up because they have been so happy all along, it’s… stupid. All the expectations he has, they’re stupid.
Shuaibo wakes up the next morning after their drunken kiss. Han was still fast asleep next to him. He looks so calm right now and Shuaibo doesn’t want to wake him up. He looks so peaceful. He knows his husband has been so busy and stressed with work, so seeing him like this, face without any wrinkle or frown, softened Shuaibo’s heart. Han looks so stupidly calm after their kiss. He looks like he’s known all along about what he wants from this relationship and just who Shuaibo is to him. Not like how it was so unclear to Shuaibo before.
“Hani, wake up,” Shuaibo mumbles, tapping Han’s chest twice.
“Nnngghh, don’t wanna.” Han whined, stuffing his face into his pillow.
“Ugh if you don’t get up I’m not getting you breakfast then.” That seemed to wake him up.
“Well good morning to you too my lovely husband,” Han mumbles sleepily as he opens his eyes, his voice raspy from sleep and Shuaibo thinks it’s so stupid that Han can immediately make a goofy joke right after he wakes up. “Fuck how much did I drink last night?”
Shuaibo giggles from his side of the bed. “You may have had one or two more drinks than needed.”
“Goddamn I feel it then, my head won’t stop pulsating.” Han said as he rubbed his temples before pausing to look at Shuaibo
“I’m sorry you had to take care of me last night,” Han started. “but if that gets me the gift of what we did last night I’ll gladly become an alcoholic for you.” he ended his sentence with a wink.
“Shut the fuck up! Ugh why did you have to ruin the moment, hey stop laughing!” Shuaibo whined. All Han could do was laugh at Shuaibo with a happy, content look on his face. As if this was all he’s ever wanted. After a couple of seconds the laughter died down and it was just silent, the two of them in each other’s arms.
“I’m sorry,” Shuaibo mumbles, resting his head on Han’s shoulder.
“For what?” Han asks, and Shuaibo has a feeling he knows.
“For not realis… ,” Shuaibo mumbles, his sentence dying off with a pout on his lips that he desperately tries to hide.
“Hmm? What was that?” Han inquires, leaving small kisses atop Shuaibo's head.
“For not realising that I really love you soon enough,” Shuaibo mumbles, nuzzling his nose further into Han’s collarbones. Embarrassment showing on his face.
“That’s okay, I know you’re not that bright,” Han snorts out, and Shuaibo punches his chest softly, “but I knew you would get there eventually. And I love you too. Have always loved you since the first time.”
The first time? What first time was he talking about? Their first meeting, their first kiss, their first time in China together? Which first time?
“You know you said something like that last night,” Shuaibo sat up, suddenly remembering Han’s words “You said you’ve wanted me for the longest time. What did you mean by that?” Shuaibo asked him, “Have we met before?”
Shuaibo has wanted to ask this since last night, but he didn’t know how to bring it up. Letting out a sigh, Han takes his hand in his, and caresses the ring on his ring finger, looking at the initials on their rings. ZSB PH.
“Let’s just say I spent a summer studying abroad in China during college,” Han started. “And on my first day a kind, tall, gentle stranger with the most beautiful hair stopped and looked over his shoulder. Seeing a new student looking so lost, the stranger helped me to class, and I was smitten ever since then.”
“Wait what!” Shuaibo screeched.
“Shh I’m not done yet. Anyways I never saw the stranger again, it wasn’t until my parents said that I was to be married to Zhang group’s son that I could finally put a name to the face I could never forget.” he finished, looking at Shuaibo with the most loving look in his eyes.
“So you’re saying you’ve had a crush on me ever since then?” Shuaibo asked.
“Well not exactly–“
“Awwee so it was love at first sight for you?” Shuaibo said with a teasing smile on his face “It’s okay I would’ve fallen for you eventually.”
“Hey I happen to be very charming,” Han started but was interrupted when he felt a pair of soft lips on his own. “If that’s how you’re going to shut me up from now on, let me keep rambling on.” Han said, his hands on the back of Shuaibo’s head, pulling him back in to reconnect their lips.
Let’s just say no one else saw them that whole weekend…
(…also pray that the walls in Shuaibo and Han’s penthouse were soundproof. Shuaibo can be quite loud if you know what I mean)