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"Hey, Div?" Pika asked, "where are your butterflies?"
Saturn, Pika and div_y rested in Saturn's base. The recent prison break left everyone exhausted, with the host slumped in a chair, his mind too full for him to truly rest, and the guests tending to eachother's wounds.
Div hummed in response. He wasn't wearing his jacket, soreness and sweat taking it's place. "I mean, Vyx is still here," he pointed to the large butterfly resting on his hair, "but the rest are probably around the server, somewhere."
"Huh..."
"But spring already passed," he started to ramble, "and i still havent seen any larvae, or any cocoons!" He huffed with annoyance.
"That's... weird, right?" Pika didn't know as much as Div did about bugs, but if his friend was concerned...
Div suddenly straightened, "Oh, don't some of them come here to eat the fruit?"
Pika fidgeted with the straps of his armour, taken off once he needed to heal himself, confused. Yes, he did sometimes see white butterflies crowd the fallen fruits near Saturn's base, but that was a long time ago, before...
Before...
(...Div laughed, embracing him and Saturn...)
He simply nods.
Div gave him a blank look. He definitely noticed Pika's hesitation.
"...Ookay, then Saturn probably saw some of them around. You should ask him."
Pika nodded, "yeah," he looked away.
The room went silent once more. Flies danced like lunatics over the players' unfinished dinner, crickets and other unknown insects sang outside, some comfortable enough with the home to fly beyond the window and into the room. The wet smell of the greenery was calming to the three players, so comfortable with eachother.
But now, that calm wasn't enough to dissolve their tense shoulders, their unspoken words. Saturn shifted where he rested, exhausted yet fillled with adrenaline.
"I don't think they're dead, by the way. I would have found their bodies." Div spoke suddenly, uncaring, with the tone of voice of that implied he found his butterflies' corpses nothing more than inconveniences. Pika, however, knew him better than that. He remembered when he cupped an upside down butterfly, wings stiff and frail, and hid it inside large patches of flowers.
Some part of him wondered if he would still do it nowadays. Full of guilt for having the thought, he mentally squashed it with his foot and looked away.
Div looked at him with a slight frown, only getting more frustated, and then dismissed his own concerns with a huff.
Pika didn't notice when Vyx walked around Div's head. He did notice, however, her fragile bug feet landing on his face, shifting and stepping everywhere while her wings blocked half of his vision.
To say he was startled would be an understatement. Div, sitting down on the floor and tired legs supported by a pillow he stole from Saturn's couch, turned to look at him with amusement. Saturn stiffened and snapped towards Pika's startled noise, then slumped in his seat, groaned in annoyance, and left the room in hopes of peace and quiet, loud thumps from his frustrated footsteps echoed in the wooden floor.
"Sorry, Saturn!" Pika wanted to say, but it was hard to do so when a bug sat in his face. Despite the previous tension, his concerns felt far away once he heard Div's muffled laugh.
"Dude, what are you training Vyx to do?!" He joked once the large butterfly climbed closer to his forehead. Div stopped bothering with trying to hide his laughter and responded, "I'm not training her to do anything, she did that herself!"
Pika slumped, sighing. Vyx's wings flapped rapidly but she did not take off. "Holy crap, that scared me..." he muttered under his breath, Div staring in amusement. The air felt lighter after their short banter, and Pika was very grateful that it was. After that, both men simply stayed in place, resting. Vyx moved a lot, her thin, fuzzy feet tickling him.
Pika had seen Div take care of butterflies since they met, and he probably was doing that since before the Cradle server. The brighter man didn't know why his friend cared for butterflies so much, but it was like Saturn's love for nature, Pika simply accepted it without questioning.
The bright man, on a whim, cupped his hands and offered them to the butterfly, now on his hair. Was it comfortable on his hair? The human wished he could ask the bug, but it would be the same as talking to an empty room. Vyx jumped down into his palms, out of curiosity or agitation, he didn't know.
Vyx didn't seem comfortable with being held by his hands, shifting in place and tickling him, but what did he know about butterfly behaviour? Even if he remembered some of Div's old rambles, he only knew the very basics: The patterns of the wings aren't all eyes, they need a lot of salt to survive, the longest they can live is a year...
Pika stared at Vyx, sudden dread creeping it's way into his ribcage. Hasn't Vyx been around before Unserious SMP?
"Div?" He called, not looking away from the agitated bug, "How old is Vyx?"
Vyx's wings flapped, flapped, flapped again. She did not take flight. Despite her movement the air felt still.
Div's voice came late, "...Three years old."
A sinking feeling in his chest, dread making it's home there. He tensed further as he stared at the large butterfly in his hands. It was pure white, almost like a light, and the very same shade as last year and the year before that. The previously light atmosphere was gone, his lips pressed tight.
Div looks at his expression once more and snaps.
"I-- dude, do you think that my butterflies are dead?!" He suddenly attacked, frowning and fists clenched tight. Pika didn't believe his friend could or would try to harm him, but he still flinched in surprise.
Pika, surprised but more so sad that he upset Div, rose his head to meet his eyes as the monochrome man continued, " I-- I-- I know it's been a while since any new butterflies appeared, but this is a large server. They're out there. Butterflies like their freedom, you know that?" The last phrase is handed out like flaming iron, with insult in it's tone. He stares at Pika head-on, the anger radiating from his eyes and his voice only making Pika feel even more guilty, "I don't need your... pessimistic views to make me think that-- that--"
He went quiet. Pika, for a while, could only hear Div's breaths.
He talks again with a more controled voice, reminiscent of a livid parent trying to tell their kid they're just disappointed, "Everything is fine." He paused, "If you want to think of the worst, then so be it. But don't... don't act like that when I'm already worried to death," Div then looked at him dead in the eyes, "Don't you understand how bad that can be for me?"
"I--I'm sorry, Div." The words came out hurriedly. He ruined the mood so quickly because of a single question, and now he wanted nothing more than to never have asked it.
Div sighed and looked away, "Whatever, man." He slouched once more, as if the outburst never happened. Flies still flew in circles, not bothered at all by the noise. The crickets outside did not stop singing once. The curling inside Pika's chest proved otherwise, though.
Vyx's wings flapped, flapped, flapped, pale as a corpse. Even she knew she was supposed to change, but couldn't while her human opposed the very nature.
So she stayed as she was, and Pika stayed quiet. Just for the quiet to last a little longer.