Work Text:
I Am So Very Tired
My skin isn't mine,
It does not belong to me,
I long ago disowned the flesh on my bones,
It sits only in my caved mind,
In a dark corner,
Right above my eyes,
So that I see,
So that I feel from seeing.
So that I feel disgust.
My head aches in the day for not fueling the vessel which carries my soul to see the world,
My stomach aches even more when the glowing moon rises,
So unforgivably heavy after all the ghost had suddenly given it.
When the urges are pulled in by the ugly magnetic tide,
Who am I to resist when the ghost of want possesses me.
And so I stuff myself with burning shame.
In the sanctuary of my warm bed I lay flat on my stomach,
Aware of every fold on the fabric of my body,
The folds that I am unfortunately fortunate enough to own,
And think to myself,
Is it better to eat, hate myself
Or not to eat, hate myself.
I am so very tired.