Work Text:
Andrew hadn't meant to ignore Lizzie; he honestly hadn't. It just happened. Every time he was near her, he felt like his heart hurt and his head was fuzzy. Like nothing else in the room existed. He wasn't sure when the feelings had started; maybe they had always been there, and he didn't notice. But he noticed now.
She was always so close but just out of reach. He kept telling himself she needed to get through high school; she didn't need to be distracted. She needed to have good grades; she needed to graduate. Even if it meant he kept his distance from her, even if it meant it killed him inside. It was important.
She had met Cath in the house this afternoon, saying she was there to prepare for prom. Andrew understood the concept of prom; he just didn't get the point. But it seemed to excite Lizzie, and it seemed to get Cath excited for her.
Andrew had been told he wasn't allowed near his own damn room until she was done. So he had decided to shove his head under the roof of her junky car instead. He might as well fix it for her while she took over his space. He heard the door open and Smurf's heels and voice carrying through the garage. He looked up and nearly dropped the damn wrench.
Fuck him.
She stood there in the prettiest green dress he had ever seen her in. Her copper hair stood out against it. His throat fucking tightened, and he couldn't help but stare.
Smurf looked so pleased, like Lizzie was her own daughter. "You look gorgeous, baby."
"Thank you," Lizzie replied shyly.
"Andrew," Smurf said. She turned towards him, and now both women were looking at him as he was fucking staring at her. Fuck. He couldn't look away. "Doesn't she look pretty, baby?"
Andrew froze as both of them watched him and waited for him to give an answer. How was he supposed to tell her she was the prettiest thing he'd ever had the pleasure of seeing? That he couldn't get her out of his fucking head.
Smurf gave a fucking knowing smirk that he knew she would bring it up to embarrass him later. But he hadn't expected her to fucking turn it entirely against him so early.
"Baz will drive you," Smurf said,
"I'm driving her," Andrew announced, his voice cut through the air without a thought. Fuck, his hands were covered in grease. He tried to clean them so he wouldn't be anywhere near her that would get her dirty. He looked up as he tried to clean himself off. Lizzie was smiling at him as if she saw right through him. Like she understood every part of him.
They both headed toward his truck; he moved and opened the door for her, making sure he didn't touch her at all in case grease got on her. He closed the door and moved to his side. He ignored the smug smirk on Smurf's face as he climbed in.
He focused on the road, or at least tried to. Lizzie kept looking at him like she was studying his face. He wanted to tell her to skip prom. He'd take her anywhere she wanted to go, just them together. That he'd kiss her if she'd let him, and he'd show her every ounce of feeling that was buried inside him. Tell her he'd wanted to kiss her for so fucking long. That every time she touched him, all he could think about was that they were meant to be together forever.
But he was supposed to let her graduate and let her go to do whatever she wanted. He wasn't supposed to tie her down to whatever the fuck life he and his brothers had.
"Andrew," she asked tentatively, still watching him. "Did I do something wrong?"
Existing.
That was all he could think of as a crime. For being the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. Being the only one who ever cared to understand him other than Julia. The only one who thought about him when no one else ever would.
"No," he replied curtly instead. He glanced over at her quickly before turning away. Fuck, she looked concerned. But he didn't know how to explain those feelings, so he held them inside. They let the truck fall back into silence as he drove. When they reached the parking lot of the hall, everyone around was dressed up just like Lizzie, but she wasn't watching them. She sat still, looking at him as Andrew faced her. "Don't accept any drinks."
"Ok," she whispered.
"Stay alert."
"I know."
"I'll be back at midnight to pick you up," he reminded her, his jaw clenched as her eyes darted to people passing the truck, ready to party the night away.
"Ok, thank you, Andrew," she said. But she moved toward him slowly; he held deathly still as her lips brushed his cheek gently. It was friendly, he reminded himself, a habit all her life, and it didn't mean what he wanted it to mean. He had to keep repeating it. Even if she smelt like vanilla that made his mouth water.
She gave him one last reassuring smile before she climbed out of the truck. He watched her head inside the hall.
He knew he should just go home and come back. It was better that he did. But what if she wanted to leave early? He was sure she didn't have her burner on her. What if she needed him? Or worse, some boy was luring her to another location.
So he sat there. Watching the crowd of people come and go. Hours passed with no sign of her. But he watched, just in case she exited.
Around 11:30, he finally saw her again. Her copper hair was disheveled and sweaty. She had thrown it up into a messy bun at the top of her head.
A girl exited behind her. "Common, Liz, are you gonna come to Chris's with us?"
"No," he saw her shake her head. "I think I'm gonna go home, just waiting for my ride. Thanks though!" With that, she sat down on the curb, content to wait for him as she waved goodbye to the girl.
Andrew turned on the truck, flashing the headlights at her. She looked up and smiled so fucking bright Andrew forgot how to breathe.
She stood up and made her way to him. She opened the door and climbed inside. She pushed her sweaty hair away from her face. "Hi!" she said as she moved to kiss him, that friendly gesture that made him want to consume her. "You got here early?"
He didn't know what to say, so he stared back at her instead. She didn't seem to care; her smile made her glow. Her cheeks were warm from being inside the hall all night.
"I appreciate the drive! I'm planning on sleeping at Smurf's tonight; it's hard to climb through a window in these!" She said playfully as she lifted her leg to allow him to see her heel. Andrew couldn't help but glance at the thigh that was exposed as her dress shifted before he turned away to face the road.
He didn't answer. He didn't know what to say without probably scaring her off. But the silence seemed to make her more nervous. She fell into her own silence as she bit her lip before she turned to watch the scenery out the window.
When he pulled into the driveway, he moved to get out of the car, but her hand grabbed his arm, pulling him back.
Her hands went to his face; she moved slowly again like she was scared she'd spook him. He sat still again, expecting the kiss to go to his cheek again. But she wasn't going for his cheek; she was looking at his lips, and he had never held so still in his entire fucking life. He was afraid to god damn breath in case it made her change her mind. She moved closer, finally kissing his lips gently before she pulled away just a bit. Her mouth hovered over his, her brown eyes looking into his soul.
"Sorry," she whispered with a small smile on her lips. "I-"
But he moved back in, kissing her with everything he wanted to say and couldn't. He needed to be with her. He needed his hands in her hair. But she moaned and the realization set in.
Guilt.
She was supposed to graduate and move on from here. From him. She didn't want him and she shouldn't. He was something familiar and comfortable. She didn't want him the way he wanted her.
He pulled away from her grasp as he looked at her, lost for words. She looked back with hurt on her face, more hurt than he had ever seen before. Andrew got out of the truck, and Lizzie didn't even wait for him to come around; she quickly got out herself and shut the door before she followed him into the house.
"I'm going to sleep in Baz's room." She looked at him as if she was waiting for him to say something. "I guess," she finished lamely. But he couldn't bring himself to tell her no. She gave a nod as she whispered goodnight and thank you before she went down the hallway.
When Andrew got into his own room, he lay on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. The tears finally fucking escaped him. Fuck he was stupid. She'd never look at him the same again. She'd avoid him, and that was it. One fucking perfect kiss in his truck before she was gone from him forever.
He lay there staring at the ceiling the entire night. He was unable to will his body to sleep. Early in the morning, he vaguely heard the door close. He got up to check on her, finding Lizzie gone.
She had left without saying goodbye.