Work Text:
Russia observed the countless, increasingly absurd letters from America strung about on his desk. Straightening his posture, he began to gleefully open each one, innocently grinning as he read about the American increasingly losing his mind.
“Hey dude, let’s like, move those missiles further away hahaha!!!”
“Hey man…when are you going to move the missiles?”
“Ahahaha you probably are shocked that my handwriting is so good that you can’t read it, but I think it’s time to move those missiles!”
“DUDE YOU NEED TO GET RID OF THE MISSILES IN CUBA!!!!! ASAP!!!!!”
The last letter Russia opened was marked with obnoxiously red ink, reading ‘extremely important’.
He chuckled at the idiocy of his counterpart, slightly shocked that he was really competing with such an intelligently stupid man. He began to think about his response, but something about the lack of communication resulting in America squirming in his seat tickled at the russian.
He could leave him hanging for a bit longer, but ah, that would be too mean. Maybe instead, he’d bring up the missiles America was keeping in Turkey, too.