Work Text:
Tina Chen walked into the nearly empty bullpen after clocking in for her shift and sighed. Another long day ahead of her. She’d thought graduating from being a rookie would have felt more rewarding, but so far being a full-fledged officer was just as grueling as ever. She could barely remember the last time she’d gotten enough sleep. Not to mention she still felt like the “new girl,” and that was proving to be a very tough hurdle to get over. She mostly kept herself to herself.
Well, there was at least one friendly face in this place.
Detective Gavin Reed seemed pretty much unanimously hated by everyone Tina had met in the DPD. But despite that, and the fact that he ranked so much higher than her, something had just clicked between them when they’d first met. During her year as a rookie she’d seen Gavin constantly scowling and glowering at everyone and everything, everywhere he went. But when they’d been assigned to the same crime scene, she’d unthinkingly made an offhand comment that, to both of their surprise, actually made Gavin laugh. And ever since then they often sought each other out during the day for a brief respite from, well, everything. They’d even gone out for drinks or dinner more than a few times after work. Unlike a lot of guys Tina had met, Gavin didn’t seem to be assuming this friendship of theirs was leading anywhere else, which she really appreciated. Man was totally married to his work anyway.
That was why her first stop upon arriving at work was Gavin’s desk. She needed the moral support. “Morning,” she greeted him.
There was an open box sitting on his desk. “Hey you have got to try this chocolate pie,” was the detective’s only response, his mouth already full.
“Oh you know I’m not that much of a sweet tooth-” The next thing she knew a plastic spoon had been practically shoved into her mouth, and on that spoon was literal heaven. “Wow my god, so creamy!” was all she had to say about the attack.
Gavin gave a moan of food ecstasy in agreement and sat back down, scarfing more into his own mouth.
Tina was still reveling in the one mouthful she’d gotten to have, all dread about her upcoming shift gone. “Oh my god that is the best pie I’ve ever had!” She came around to the other side of the desk to read the box. “Where did you get this?!”
Gavin froze like a deer in the headlights. “It was at my desk when I got here somebody must’ve sent it to me.”
Tina frowned. Gavin had never mentioned any family, or friends for that matter. Then her eyes widened as she finished reading the tag. “Gavin, this is not addressed to you, this is addressed to Chris! From his wife!! You thief!!”
“Will you keep your voice down?!” Gavin hissed, looking around wildly. “Look, I didn’t read the fucking box before I opened it, I just- I dunno I monkey-brained, okay?! And you can’t return the box to someone after it’s been opened!”
“What- why not??”
“Because it’s too delicious!” His tone was wretched, but he couldn’t help taking another bite.
Tina took a moment to compose herself. “Gavin, you stole this pie, that is wrong!”
“No no no, it’s going to be okay,” the detective reasoned, getting to his feet, “because Chris and his wife are gonna send away for a free one, and that means we all win! The only losers are the big fucking pie conglomerate-” He paused to read the packaging more closely and was crestfallen at what he found. “Mama’s Little Bakery…!” He pictured some poor little old woman running an entire bakery all by herself, getting an angry message about a pie that never showed up and having to remake it and send it all the way to Detroit… “I feel terrible. I am a horrible, fucked up scumbag.”
When Tina never responded, he looked to see she was completely lost in another bite of pie. “I’m sorry, what?” she said when she realized Gavin had stopped talking and was staring at her.
“I thought you weren’t a sweet tooth, I thought this was wrong!” the detective sneered.
Tina hesitated. “Well, you’ve already eaten most of it at this point anyway… Chris wouldn’t want less than half a pie, would he?” And she sat down across from Gavin to keep eating.
They were lucky enough to get it finished before most other people clocked in for the day, including Chris. Neither one of them could look him in the eye all day long, and avoided him whenever possible. Gavin started concocting a scheme in his head to try and sneak the money for the pie into one of Chris’ desk drawers somewhere, even though he was sure Chris would get a second one for free. But amidst all of that, whenever he and Tina ran across each other, they couldn’t help but to smile and stifle a laugh. It made everything else bearable.
As Tina arrived at work the next day, she felt significantly more cheerful than she had the morning before. The shared secret of the little forbidden escapade yesterday was highly amusing to her, and somehow stealing a coworker’s food made her feel like she was fitting in more than anything else had. She went over to Gavin’s desk again, to see if they could come up with a plan to make restitution to poor Chris. She was excited about it, in a way. All of this was the first time she’d had any fun at work.
“Morning, Detective!”
Gavin was sitting staring at a box on his desk, and his only response was to whisper-shout, “Another pie came! They delivered it to the wrong motherfucking desk again!”
“So? Just go put it on Chris’ desk. What’s the problem?”
Gavin continued to stare unblinkingly. “I can’t seem to say goodbye!”
“Are you serious??” The fun quickly turned into annoyance. “Gavin, we ate an entire pie yesterday, Chris’ pie by the way, and you want more??”
“Well I’ve forgotten what it tastes like, okay?!” His tone was very snarky.
“It was pie,” Tina said exasperatedly. “It was fine. It had a buttery, flaky, airy crust, with a very… rich yet light, luxurious chocolate filling….”
Gavin looked up at her to find she was now intently staring at the second pie.
“Wow my whole mouth just filled with saliva!” she whispered, turning away so as not to be able to see the pie anymore.
“Y’know what? Forget it,” Gavin decided. “We’re just hungry! Neither of us had breakfast this morning, am I right?”
Tina had to nod her assent. He already knew her that well.
“Yeah, see, so we’re just lightheaded! So let’s go out and grab breakfast and forget about the pie.” He stood and started gathering up his effects.
Tina hesitated. “I- don’t know if I’d really be allowed to.”
“C’mon, it’s an order from a detective. You can’t say no to that.”
A brief smile flashed across Tina’s face. “When you put it that way…!” Pulling rank to get her a nice treat during shift? Definitely a good friend.
Gavin clapped her on the shoulder and started heading for his car.
“Wait!” Tina called after him as an idea struck her. “Let’s drop the pie off at Chris’ desk so we’re not tempted.”
“Good idea.”
They both looked around shiftily to make sure no one noticed Tina gather the box into her arms and try to hunch herself over to hide it. Speedwalking to Chris’ desk (which was gratefully empty), Gavin kept watch while Tina surreptitiously placed the pie where it always should have been. Then the two put their heads down and rushed for the front door.
“Where do you wanna go to eat?” Gavin asked.
“Mama’s Little Bakery, Chicago, Illinois?” Tina grimaced.
“Stop that, we’re supposed to be NOT thinking about the pie!!”
“Sorry I can’t help it!!”
They reentered the bullpen an hour or two later, significantly more laid-back than when they’d left. “Well, thanks for breakfast,” Gavin said.
Tina brought him to a halt, an expression of horror on her face. “Wait a minute, I didn’t pay, I thought you paid!”
Gavin looked at her blankly. “So apparently we just don’t pay for food anymore,” he finally deadpanned.
It made Tina’s troubled look turn into a laugh. He could always put her at ease. “Guess we can add dining and dashing to our list of crimes.”
The detective subtly smiled to himself, glad he’d been able to cheer her up. She always seemed so anxious and wound up- it was good for her to get to relax. “We’ll go back and pay them at lunch.” As he turned back to the room, he inhaled sharply and grabbed the officer’s hand, pulling her close to himself for moral support. “You see what I see??” he whispered with wide eyes.
Tina followed his gaze and her eyes widened, too. The pie was laying exactly where she’d left it on Chris’ desk. “It’s still there…” She tried to avert her eyes.
“Chris must be out on patrol. He doesn’t even know it’s been delivered.”
As one, they crept closer to Officer Miller’s desk, irresistibly drawn to the box.
“He could be on patrol all day,” Tina found herself reasoning. “Maybe he’ll be gone until his shift ends!”
“By then the pie would’ve gone bad, we don’t want him to come back to bad pie,” Gavin mused.
“No, that could kill him!”
“Yeah well we wouldn’t fucking want that!”
“No so we’re protecting him.”
“Well we should take it!!”
“Yeah but we should move quick.” Tina’s eyes had locked onto something across the bullpen.
“Why??”
“Because he just walked in-”
“Go!!” Gavin hissed, keeping watch as Tina yoinked the box and made a mad dash for an empty office. “Go go go go go go go…” he kept it up in a steady stream under his breath as they ran.
A few minutes later the two of them were once again eating an entire stolen pie. Tina briefly wondered when she’d become that jerk who eats other people’s food at the office. And yet…
“Oh my god that is so good!” she exulted.
“I’m full,” Gavin stated, “but I know if I stop eating this, I will fucking regret it!” His phone suddenly buzzed, and he hastily pulled it out to check what the notification was. “Shit, there’s a homicide. See if you can hide this in the fridge, we can finish it when we get back.”
Tina now found herself wondering when things had spiraled so far out of control that she was sneaking through the precinct, feeling like she was doing a stealth mission in Metal Gear, to get the pie into the fridge in the breakroom without Chris (or anyone else, particularly not any androids who recorded everything) seeing. But at the same time, she had a very positive adrenaline rush coursing through her. The knowledge that her camaraderie with Gavin had increased to the point that they were partners in workplace crimes made her feel like she belonged. It felt almost like high school again, doing the stupidest things with your friends for no reason. Her cheeks were flushed and she laughed breathlessly as she successfully stashed the pie away. As long as they made things right with Chris in the end, this was proving to be her best week of work at any job ever! (And knowing Chris, he wouldn’t be too mad as long as they paid up. He was the sweetest guy.)
Her enjoyment was dampened somewhat when she left the breakroom and saw Chris talking to Lieutenant Anderson. Uh-oh. Did she just have a guilty conscience or did it definitely look like they were talking about the pies? And right in front of Captain Fowler’s office, too. What if they got in trouble?? She didn’t know of anyone in the precinct that wasn’t scared shitless by Fowler, and Anderson was certainly no teddy bear. She’d only ever seen him from afar; if she was honest with herself, she was too intimidated by his rank and especially his stature to approach (he was just so tall…) Plus, she’d heard some weird things about him. Conflicting reports, true, but he didn’t seem like someone you wanted to mess with either way. And Gavin certainly had a bone to pick with the lieutenant. The way he told it, Anderson was constantly drunk and getting away with shit, and out to get Gavin fired specifically. What if this was just the excuse Anderson needed to finally make that happen? She was still new here herself, and fresh as an officer. The slightest misstep could be used to get her fired. The way she saw it, they were both on thin ice with Anderson in the picture.
Tina decided that once they got back from this crime scene, she had to convince Gavin that they needed to come clean. Chris would understand they hadn’t meant any harm, they’d just gotten carried away by those fucking pies. He and his wife ordered them, after all, so they knew how utterly delicious they were. They’d get that you weren’t responsible for your actions while under the influence of Mama’s Little Bakery.
But Tina didn’t even know just how strong that influence could be. She didn’t know that, a few hours later when she got back, the second she had the pie in her hands it would override her better judgment and just demand to be eaten. Chris still wouldn’t want less than half a pie, right?????
With the crime scene all taken care of, Detective Gavin Reed finally trudged back into the bullpen. He sighed deeply. He could really use some more of that pie right now. It had gotten him through yesterday, and it was sure to work its magic again today.
But when he got to the fridge in the breakroom, he looked in every hidey-hole he could possibly think of and the pie wasn’t anywhere in there. Had they been found out?! Or….
Gavin strode swiftly to the empty office he and Tina had commandeered as their secret hiding place. When he thrust the door open, he found his worst fears had been confirmed.
“Are you eating the pie without me?!”
Tina looked up at him with guilty eyes, her cheeks full like a chipmunk. “Mm-mm!” was all she could say around the mouthful of food while shaking her head.
Gavin narrowed his eyes. “I will give you $100 to whistle right now.”
After a long moment, Tina blew crumbs of pie out of her mouth.
The detective threw his hands up in vindication and also frustration. “You can’t fucking eat the pie without me!!”
“Oh, what’re you gonna do to stop me?!?” Tina rebutted after finally swallowing. “You gonna go run and tell Lieutenant Anderson?? You gonna tell Captain Fowler?! No, because then you’d have to tell them what we did! We are dessert-stealers, we are living outside of the law!”
She seemed genuinely upset for some reason, but Gavin wasn’t having any of it.“Y’know what, I don’t trust you with this pie anymore.” He picked up the open box. “I got it first, AND I’M TAKIN’ IT BACK!” He turned on his heel and started walking to the door of the office. A distant part of him wondered how a simple delivery mistake had gotten them to this point, but the rest of him just wanted to have literally the yummiest pie in the world!
“What?!!” Tina squawked, hastily getting to her feet and going after him. “You think I trust you with it?! No, we’re gonna split it! You take half and I take half!”
“Well that’s bullshit, you’ve already had some!”
“Alright, well in that case, I could call in all the money you owe me from-”
Gavin didn’t need to be reminded she always beat him at darts, pool, cards, you name it. “What do we use to split it?!” he snapped venomously.
Smirking at her triumph, Tina took the empty nameplate from the desk. No way she was leaving him alone with the pie long enough to go get a knife, and this was straight as a ruler anyway. She attempted to cut the pie as exactly in half as she possibly could. “Alright, pick a half!” she finally grumbled.
Gavin started scrutinizing both pieces closely. “Okay. Well, this side looks bigger, uhh, there’s more crust on this side, so- maybe if I measure-”
“OH FOR GOD’S SAKE JUST PICK A PIECE!” Tina exploded.
“Alright, I pick that one!” Gavin griped, pointing at random.
“Ha!! That’s the smaller piece,” Tina taunted while shoveling it onto a plate for him. “Okay, there you go! Enjoy your half, my friend, but that is it! No sharing, no switching, and don’t come crying to me if you eat your piece too fast!” She opened the door to leave but then the unthinkable happened: her foot caught and she let out an involuntary screech as her entire half of the pie splattered all over the floor.
“Aww!!” Gavin cried in mock sympathy. All thoughts of remaining quiet to keep their secret had left both of their heads at this point; nothing was left between their ears but pie.
“Okay, you gotta give me some of your piece.” Tina was already all business again.
“Fuck no! ‘No switching, no sharing, and don’t come crying to me!’ Hahaha! I may just sit here and have my pie all day, just sit here by the door, and eat my-!”
Tina, who had been listening to this with a dead-eyed expression, reached out and slapped Gavin’s plate out of his hand, dumping its contents all over the floor. They both stared at the two piles for a long moment. Then they gradually looked up at each other again.
“What are we doing?” Gavin eventually said.
That caused both of them to burst into laughter.
“This pie really makes you see red, huh?”
“No kidding,” the detective agreed. “Jesus, maybe it’s a good thing it’s gone now.”
“Well,” Tina said, looking down thoughtfully, “maybe not completely gone. There’s a good amount of stuff on top that hasn’t touched the floor at all. If this is gonna be my last time having anything from Mama’s Little Bakery, I want to make sure I finish it dammit!”
Gavin wrinkled his nose at the thought of eating off the floor at first, but found that he couldn’t disagree with her logic. “I mean, I guess as long as we only eat what’s on the very top…”
“Great! Let’s go get you a spoon too.”
“We’d better be fast before one of those motherfucking androids finds it and cleans it up.”
As they very quickly walked to the break room, Tina joked quietly, “You know, I never knew work could be fun like this.”
“I never did either,” Gavin agreed genuinely, which surprised Tina. As a detective, he’d been on the force a lot longer than she had. And he’d never had fun? That thought was really… sad.
Before long, they’d made it back and were studying the mess extremely closely to make sure they only got the cleanest parts of the pie. It was worth it though, that taste was worth it! Literal heaven.
Footsteps and a large, looming shadow suddenly approached them. Gavin and Tina froze. They’d been so caught up in getting every last morsel of deliciousness they’d forgotten they were now in plain sight. Slowly, the two looked up in unison.
Lieutenant Anderson was casually leaning against the wall. “So, what’re you having?”
Tina felt her stomach drop as the memory of Chris talking to Anderson replayed in her mind’s eye. How could she not have remembered to warn Gavin about that?! The stupid fucking pie drove it out of her head! Were they about to get fired??
While all this panic was screaming through her skull, the only thing her mouth said was, “Um…”
Gavin, on the other hand, snarled out a sigh. Tina watched a mask drop back over his face- that scowling, glowering look she’d always seen on him before she’d made him laugh. No more having fun. No more enjoying himself at work. He was back to the Detective Reed that everyone in the precinct hated. “It’s just pie,” he spat at the Lieutenant. Tina was taken aback at how much hatred there was in his voice.
But the lieutenant wasn’t fazed. He just said lightly, “The pies that keep disappearing from Chris’ desk?”
Damn. Tina really should have warned Gavin about Anderson and Chris. This was all her fault…
But Gavin didn’t seem too concerned, he just grumbled as he got to his feet, “Alright, I’ll fucking pay Chris back for both the pies, don’t worry about it.”
“Good.”
That… seemed to be the end of it. Tina was kind of shocked. After everything she’d heard, she wasn’t expecting Anderson to be so even-keeled and low-key. He didn’t even seem angry. He just wanted to make sure Chris was treated right.
Tina felt like she always had as a kid whenever her parents had hit her with the ‘I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.’ Her face burning, she jumped to her feet and said, “I’ll chip in too, Lieutenant. I should take equal responsibility for-”
“No! No, she shouldn’t. I’m the one who ate it first and then made her try it. I’m her senior officer, right? It’s like an abuse of power or something.”
A detective was really going to bat for her? Not a detective, she reminded herself. A friend. “Gavin, I ended up eating just as much of both pies as you did. It’s only fair. And you didn’t make me do anything.”
She could feel Anderson’s eyes on both of them, like he was x-ray scanning them or something, seeing right through to their thoughts. But after watching them for just a moment longer than was comfortable, he only asked, “Why did you guys keep taking them, anyway?”
“Why do you care?” Gavin clapped back.
Anderson raised an eyebrow at the stupid question.
Tina got an idea. He was way more cool than anyone had made him out to be. Maybe… “Um. Sir.” She still had a spoonful in her hand, and raised it slightly. “Would you like to try a bite?”
“What??” Anderson was clearly bewildered. Gavin also threw her a look that said WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!
But Tina didn’t allow either of them to throw her off, even though having to look so far up to meet someone’s eyes was making her antsy. “If you taste it, I think you’ll understand.”
Anderson was making direct eye contact with her now, sizing her up. She didn’t blink. Finally he pursed his lips and mused, “That good, huh?” With a deep breath, he shifted his weight off of the wall and shrugged, “Why not?”
Tina gave him the spoon. He chewed thoughtfully, and his eyebrows slowly went higher and higher. “Goddamn,” he said at length. His gaze darted hungrily to what was left on the floor. “What bakery does Chris get these from?”
“He sends for them from Chicago,” Gavin informed him.
“What?? What does he do a stupid fucking thing like that for?”
“Well clearly because they make the best pies!”
Anderson looked at the mess again, then glanced both ways to see if Chris was anywhere in sight. “Alright well Chris isn’t gonna want what’s been on the floor anyway. Let’s just go ahead and finish this.”
“Lieutenant??” Tina was shocked but also kind of delighted.
“Go grab another spoon, Chen, and quick!” Anderson hissed.
Tina dashed to the break room, her mind reeling. Lieutenant Anderson was nothing like what she’d heard. He even knew her name, which she hadn’t been expecting at all. And far from having a vendetta against Gavin, he hadn’t even punished Gavin, or her, for that matter. He just wanted them to pay Chris back, which they’d both planned to do anyway. She found herself hoping she’d passed whatever inspection he’d just done on her with those x-ray eyes of his.
When she handed the spoon to the lieutenant, she had to hold back a laugh at the sight of him on the ground next to Gavin, and next to her once she’d knelt back down. He’d been converted to that pie so quickly there wasn’t even time to blink. Gavin grudgingly allowed Anderson to share their floor pie with them, but he wouldn’t let Anderson’s spoon go past a certain point. “Stick to your side!” he’d snap, batting the lieutenant’s spoon away with his own. For some reason Anderson just let him. But Tina thought she saw something subtly change behind those heavily guarded blue eyes. Was it her imagination, or was there a quiet sadness there?
When they’d finally gotten all the top layer and were ready to start actually cleaning up, they heard a small, polite clearing of the throat. This time all 3 of them slowly looked up with guilty eyes.
There was Chris, completely thrown by the scene he saw in front of him.
After a good thirty seconds of silence, Chris just said, “Hank??”
“They’d already spilled your pie all over the floor, and it was really good!” Anderson said defensively. “I made sure they’ll pay you back anyway.”
“We always wanted to pay you back, Chris,” Tina said in a small voice.
“See? There ya go!”
“Well, th-thank you, but- why would any of you eat it off of the floor?!”
Now they stared at him, dumbfounded. “Have you tried it??” Gavin demanded.
“No, I haven’t! My wife is from Chicago and she loves this place, she wanted me to get to try one of their pies but…”
The three on the floor were stricken. Chris had never even gotten to try any? And now they’d eaten it all?!
“I- but- it was just on my desk and I opened it without reading-”
“I thought for sure you must’ve been a regular of this place, I’m so sorry Chris-”
“Jesus, Chris, we just sat here and finished your last pie!”
“Hello,” a warm voice cut in among all of them. A smiling woman with dark skin, an officer’s uniform and an LED at her temple had joined their group. Both Anderson and Gavin physically leaned away in distaste. “I see there’s some kind of a mess over here. Can I help by cleaning it up?”
“Sure, knock yourself out,” Gavin said without any energy as he and the others got to their feet.
“Right away,” the android said with a nod, and got to work.
“Whatever,” Anderson muttered under his breath with an eye roll, and quickly made to leave, Gavin not far behind him.
Tina hesitated, not sure whether she should say thank you to an android or not, but Chris beat her to the punch: “Thanks for your help.”
“No problem, Officer Miller!”
As Tina and Chris went to catch up with the other two, Tina tried to explain to him, “We thought you’d understand why we couldn’t help ourselves when it came to your pies. It’s because they’re so good.. well, you just have to try one to see. You literally won’t believe it. But if we’d known you’ve never had one- and Gavin, he really didn’t read the box until he’d already started eating!”
“But your lesser natures got the better of you in the end, huh?” When Chris saw how shamefaced Tina looked, he smiled and assured her, “Don’t worry, I get that you didn’t really mean any harm. My wife and I want to make sure to properly support this place though, it’s a very small business and she knows the owner.”
“Of course! Gavin, cough it up, c’mon,” she commanded as she started going through her own wallet.
“Yeah, okay,” Gavin acquiesced.
Anderson stayed just long enough to see the money make it into Chris’ hands, then with one last apologetic look at the officer, he slipped away as softly as he’d made his entrance. Tina glanced after him once. Going back to just sit hunched over at his desk again, keeping his head down and not interacting with anyone. She felt bad for him. She was glad he’d gotten some of the pie, even though it meant Chris hadn’t. Anderson and Gavin were more alike than either of them cared to admit.
“If another pie shows up at my desk I swear I won’t eat any of it,” Gavin promised.
Chris laughed. “I think we’re just gonna order to our house from now on.”
“Aww but I wanted to see your face when you tried it!” Tina protested.
Chris thought for a second. “Well, if you want, you guys could maybe come over and we could all have some pie together?”
“That sounds fun!” Tina said.
There was a strange look on Gavin’s face, like he’d never been invited over to a coworker’s place before. Tina realized maybe he hadn’t. “You sure? Even though we’ve been stealing from you?”
“I’m positive, and I know Maeve will want to meet you guys.” Despite being so much younger than him, Chris spoke to Gavin very reassuringly.
“I love that your wife’s name is Maeve, it’s such a cool name!!” Tina cried.
“It’s a classic in Chicago, apparently!” Chris informed them.
Gavin looked pleased to be included in the conversation, but was happy to sit and let the two officers do most of the talking. Friends from work, huh? Tina thought to herself, quirking an eyebrow at the little smile on Gavin’s face. It’s more likely than you think!