Work Text:
I auditioned for the role of the yearned. The details were to be admired and loved.
I got the yearner. The details are to admire and to love.
I hate my role, because it’s always the same.
Just once, I’d like to be the star, not the star-strucked.
Just once, I’d like to be the beauty, not the beast.
Just once, I’d liked to be the crush, not the crushed.
Can’t I have that?
Just once when can I get the flowers, not buy the flowers.?
Just once when can they bow and kiss my hand, and I’m not the bowed.?
Just once when can I be the muse, not the poet.?
Why can’t I have that?
Why do I have to be the one who plans,
The one who makes the art,
The one who throws the pebbles to the window?
“Oh, but a relationship is about giving, not getting.”
Then why am I the only one giving?
Why is it me who never gets the birthday texts?
Where are the small details I tell them? Where did they go?
I’m stuck as the one who remembers the memory.
And just once, I’d like a change of roles.
7/17/26