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“CYBER!”
A loud yell echoed through the alleyways. Impulse huffed in frustration. He’d been trying to shake the damn hero for what felt like 20 minutes now. A thwip sounded, an arrow hitting the bricks right next to his head a second later.
Panic rising, Impulse turned down a narrow pathway between two buildings, praying it would at least somewhat slow Hotguy down.
It must’ve worked. As Impulse emerged into a much wider, empty street, he held his breath to listen for any pursuing footsteps, and heard nothing. He let out a big sigh, catching his breath, yet still on guard for any sneaky ambushes. He doubted any would come, however. Hotguy was more known for out-in-the-open combat, rather than chasing his victims through a maze of narrow, winding streets.
Impulse narrowed his eyes. Hotguy might not be after him anymore, but he wouldn’t be surprised if he had radioed for some backup…
BAM!
A sudden rise in the temperature around him was all the warning Impulse got before a fist came flying towards his face. Just barely managing to get an arm up in time to block, he whirled around and got a good look at his new opponent. Red filled his vision, literally. The guy had slicked-back blonde hair, and was wearing a bright red vest, with a darker shirt underneath. A pair of crimson goggles met Impulse’s gaze, and the newcomer grinned.
“Hey, Cyber! How’s it hanging?”
Impulse bit back a groan at the sound of the obnoxiously cheerful voice and raised his fists.
“Hey, Blaze.” The villain’s voice was far more dull, causing the hero to pout.
“What, not excited to see me?” Blaze drew a knife from one of the many pockets in his dark grey cargo pants, twirling it around in his fingers before curling his fingers around the blade. Impulse remembered how confused he was the first time he saw Blaze do that, before seeing the faint red glow emanating from his hand and realized what was happening.
“Just turning the heat up a bit,” Blaze had said with a cheeky smirk.
It had been a few years since their first encounter, and Impulse was only mildly disappointed that the hero hadn’t come up with any new tricks since then. Although, as much as he hated to admit it, Blaze was still the most fun to fight out of all the heroes.
“Who wouldn’t be excited to see you?” Impulse drawled sarcastically, swinging an arm towards the hand holding the knife. Blaze reacted quickly, flipping the blade around and dodging backwards. The knife quickly came towards his leg, causing Impulse to throw himself to the side to avoid getting slashed by the now-burning metal. Scowling, he got to his feet and rammed his shoulder into Blaze’s side, causing the hero to go flying with a yelp. He landed on top of a nearby car, causing the alarm to start blaring. Sliding off of the car with a frown, Blaze adjusted his grip on the knife and leapt at Impulse. Impulse dove under him, coming up right next to the car. Using his advanced strength, he ripped the passenger door off its frame, bringing it up as a makeshift shield. He heard the knife go thunk in the door, a low sizzling filling the air.
“Property damage, really, Cyber?” Blaze said loudly, the car alarm still wailing behind them.
Impulse didn’t bother giving him a response, holding the door with one hand and throwing another punch with the other. Blaze blocked it and immediately went in with the knife again.
With the blade quickly approaching his arm, Impulse heaved the car door in his opponent’s direction.
It collided with Blaze, causing the hero to yell in pain.
The knife, only inches from stabbing into his upper arm, suddenly veered off course, coming into contact with a spot right below his collarbone, dragging deeply all the way across his chest.
Excruciating hot pain shot through Impulse’s veins, and he let out a strangled cry, staggering away. He brought a hand up to clutch at his chest, already feeling blood gushing out of the searing wound. Gasping, he fell to his knees, distantly registering Blaze cursing and throwing his knife away to the side as he ran towards Impulse.
“Cyber?” Blaze’s panicked voice caused Impulse to turn towards him, gasping. His knees gave out, his body falling to the concrete below like a rock. Blaze caught him, wrapping his arms around the villain. Impulse winced sharply at the heat still radiating from his hands and Blaze drew back hurriedly.
The pain in his chest was fading to a dull ache, however his mind felt numb and his limbs felt heavy. Head lolling back as his vision went blurry, Impulse vaguely saw Blaze talking rapidly, holding a finger up to his ear where Impulse realized he was wearing an earpiece. The still-blaring car alarm stole any chance of Impulse making out a word the hero was saying.
Fuzzy thoughts floated through Impulse’s mind, like how had he never noticed that earpiece before and who was Blaze talking to, and then everything went dark.
Impulse didn’t know what he was expecting as he woke up, but it certainly wasn’t an unfamiliar apartment. As soon as that piece of information registered in his mind, his eyes widened and he shot up from where he was lying down on a couch. Well, tried to, at least. Blinding pain tore through his chest as soon as he moved and he hissed, clutching a hand to his skin. That was when he realized two more things: he wasn’t wearing a shirt, and there were bandages wrapped around his torso. A few spots of blood showed through the material. Looking around wildly, he found his ripped, bloodstained shirt and jacket draped over a nearby dining chair. Impulse stared at it for a moment, almost as if making sure it was definitely his. The yellow jacket was covering his iconic ‘i’ on the black shirt (Gem always made fun of him for putting such a personal detail into his costume, but Impulse didn’t care), but the magenta lines and hazard symbol on the jacket’s sleeves were obvious enough.
His glasses and gloves were still on him, however. That was…weirdly convenient. Slower this time, he tried to sit up again, but he froze as someone spoke up nearby.
“Hey! Careful!”
Instantly starting to panic again, Impulse whipped his head around to find a man sitting at a desk on the other side of the room that he hadn’t noticed before.
The man had blonde hair and striking purple eyes that glinted with an almost maniacal look as he grinned wildly. He was wearing a brown cardigan that looked soft to touch, and blue jeans that were covered in– were those burn marks?
“You’re awake!” The guy exclaimed, shaking Impulse from his thoughts and clapping his hands together in satisfaction. “Took you long enough.”
Impulse tried to get his breathing under control. “Wh–” He jerked backwards as the guy stood up. “What’s going on? Where am I? Who are–” He cut off as the guy just… walked out of the room. Impulse stared at the doorway, mouth agape.
“Hey!” He yelled weakly. “Get back here!”
It took Impulse an embarrassingly long moment to realize that he wasn’t even tied up. Amateurs, he thought with a scoff.
Just as he had braced himself enough to try to stand up and survey any potential escape routes, the guy walked back in, accompanied by another person. Impulse quickly pressed himself back against the couch, squinting in suspicion. The newcomer muttered something to the first guy, who nodded and went back to sit down at the desk. The new guy turned towards Impulse, who was able to get a good look at him as he passed by the window. Impulse drew in a sharp breath. Despite the guy wearing a non-descript grey hoodie and jeans, blonde hair tousled and messy, the red goggles were too recognizable for it to be anyone else.
Blaze had him.
Blaze had him and now the agency was surely on their way to collect him and lock him up and–
“Hey, hey, dude, calm down,” a familiar voice said, suddenly very close to him.
Impulse blinked, finding Blaze right in front of him, hands raised placatingly.
“You’re safe here.”
Impulse scoffed disbelievingly.
“I mean it!” Blaze said, glancing helplessly towards the other guy, who had picked up a strange device that was sitting on the desk and was now fiddling with it rather carelessly.
“He means it,” the other guy chimed in.
Blaze sighed. There was a moment of awkward silence before he clapped his hands, putting on a large smile. “So! Introductions!”
Impulse frowned. “Wh–”
“You’re Cyber!” Blaze interrupted, jabbed a finger towards him. “Notorious villain known for his super strength and technical abilities. And, as you know, I’m Blaze, probably the most popular hero in the entire city.” Impulse rolled his eyes. Everyone knew Hotguy was the most popular, for better or worse. “This is…” Blaze paused, glancing at the other guy. “You never ended up deciding on a code name, did you?”
“I’m Sheep.” The guy said.
“...Sheep.” Blaze echoed disbelievingly.
“Yep.”
All three people in the room were completely silent for a moment.
“The right-hand man of the famous superhero Blaze is called…’Sheep’.” Blaze pinched the bridge of his nose.
“The one and only!” ‘Sheep’ said with a smug grin.
“See, the worst part is I can’t even tell if you’re joking or not!” Blaze turned to Impulse, throwing his hands up in the air. “This is totally something he would actually do!”
“I am actually doing it.”
“OKAY FINE! You’re Sheep.”
“Baa.” Sheep said wisely.
Blaze snorted, obviously trying to keep his composure, but couldn’t help the giggles that bubbled up. “You’re such an idiot, dude.”
Sheep saluted back at him, spinning in his chair. “Not any more of an idiot than you, good sir.”
“Says the one not even wearing anything to cover his face,” Blaze said flatly.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sheep replied, lifting a hand to cover his mouth. “I’ve always been doing this.”
Impulse bit the inside of his cheek to stop himself from smiling. He was still in the dark here, still unsure what the real motive behind all of this was. They could very well be trying to lower his guard on purpose, then strike when he was least expecting it, then put him in custody for the rest of his–
“So, Cyber,” Blaze said conversationally, picking up the first aid kit. “I’m just gonna take the bandages off, is that okay?”
“Uh– y– yeah, sure,” Impulse stuttered, thrown for a loop. Why was the hero being so… friendly? He was expecting some light torture, at least.
The wound wasn’t a pretty sight. Dried blood coated his chest, and the skin around the deep cut was all burnt. Blaze inhaled sharply.
“Yikes,” he said, uncapping a bottle of saline, then unceremoniously dumping half the contents on the injury.
Impulse gritted his teeth to muffle the scream that tore out of his throat. Blaze chuckled, and– ah, ok, so this was the torture.
“Sorry,” the hero said, only sounding half-sorry. He picked up a cotton bud and started using that to dab the saline on instead. “You think it needs stitches? I don’t actually know how to do stitches, so I hope it doesn’t need stitches. It probably needs stitches.”
Impulse honestly had no idea if Blaze was actually talking to him or not.
“Uh. I can handle no stitches, it’s fine.”
Blaze whistled. “Ooh, we got a tough guy here. You sure? This wound is pretty nasty,” he scrunched up his face. “Like, sheesh, this probably hurts like hell.”
“...You’re talking as if you’re not the one who did this to me.”
“Well, okay, I was aiming for your arm,” Blaze muttered in defense. “And then you just HAD to go and throw a car door at me and mess it all up.”
“Wh— you were still trying to stab me though!” Impulse said loudly.
“Yeah, but not badly,” Blaze retorted. “I’ve got a bruise, you know! That door hurt!”
“I’ve got a knife wound across my chest!”
“Gentlemen, let’s all calm down here,” came Sheep’s voice from across the room. He wasn’t even looking at them, too focused on his mysterious contraption.
Blaze huffed and went back to dabbing saline on the wound.
Impulse frowned in confusion and finally asked the question that had been plaguing his mind ever since the hero walked into the room. “So… why are you helping me?”
Blaze paused for a moment, setting the bottle down, then let out a long sigh, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. “Look, Cyber, I’m gonna be real with you. Being a hero? It’s kinda boring.” He lowered his voice to a whisper. “Like, real boring sometimes. You villains? You guys make it fun! Gives us something to do, gives us a purpose, as pathetic as that sounds. I mean,” he added hastily. “Guys like The Goat, y’know, like the actual actual bad guys still gotta be stopped. Like, the ones who actually have a direct kill count and stuff. But the villains like you?” Blaze grinned. “Robbing banks, graffiti-ing random walls, stealing from the big corps, threatening the government? Now those kinds of things I can get behind, I can respect.”
Impulse opened his mouth to protest that he did more than those four things, but Blaze kept going before he could interject.
“I mean, c’mon, we’ve got a real fun thing going here! An ongoing game of cat and mouse but sometimes I’m the cat and you’re the mouse and sometimes you’re the cat and I'm the mouse and it’s fun!” He clapped to emphasize the last two words. “You always manage to keep me on my toes, Cyber, and we’re a good match, skill-wise. Fights with you are never too easy but also nothing too serious ever really happens– well. Except for today,” he gestured at the bandages. “Still sorry about that, by the way.”
That was the first genuine apology he’d heard. “It’s fine,” Impulse said, a bit dazed at everything Blaze was spilling. Never would’ve guessed a hero would be this morally-grey.
“Anyways, in conclusion: I don’t want you to die. So we brought you here so the agency couldn’t get to you first.”
“You’re keeping me alive out of…entertainment?”
Blaze spluttered. “No! Well–”
“‘Well’?” Impulse scoffed. “I see how it is.”
“Nonono! I just meant, well, I don’t really know you that well right now! So realistically, for now that is kind of why, but!” Blaze gently put his hands on Impulse’s shoulders, being wary of his injury. “But what I’m saying, Cyber, is that it could turn into something more! Something like, I dunno, genuine care?”
Impulse blinked. “You…want to be friends?”
“Kinda sounded like romantic implications to me,” Sheep put in. Impulse had almost forgotten he was there. “‘Could turn into something more’, I mean, c’mon, really?”
“Shut your face,” Blaze shot back.
Sheep raised his hands in surrender and went back to fiddling with the device.
Impulse tilted his head towards Blaze. “You don’t think I have a kill count?”
“I know you don’t,” Blaze said. “I keep track of that kinda stuff.”
“What if I’ve killed people, I dunno, in secret?” He hasn’t, but he was curious as to how Blaze was so confident.
“Wh–” Blaze sputtered. Ah, so he wasn’t that confident. “...Have you?”
Impulse stifled a laugh at how concerned the hero suddenly looked. He considered playing with him for a bit, but didn’t want to risk Blaze’s mercy disappearing on him.
“No, don’t worry,” Impulse said, leaning back. “I’m not like that.” After a moment, he sat forward again. “What, do you have, like, a list?”
Blaze brightened. “Yep! Not really sure why, something something justice, I dunno, but here!” He surprised Impulse by pulling an actual honest-to-god piece of paper out of his pocket and handing it over. Impulse took it, completely baffled.
“Why do you just…never mind.” He turned his attention to the list. It had villain’s names, then multiple crossed out numbers as they got updated, then various notes beside them.
MY SUPER ACCURATE VILLAIN KILL COUNT LIST
- The Goat - 7 individuals - 3 mass homicides - very very bad guy and his fake horns look stupid but if i say that he will def kill me. let hotguy handle him
- Zombie - 4 individuals - they ACTUALLY scare me
- Bolt and Ghost - tied at 2 mass homicides - possibly 3 although still unconfirmed whether anyone was actually on that ship
- Watcher - 1 mass homicide but it was like a really big one and idk how many people were in that building so honestly this guy might need to be at the top of list. I think he will kill more he seems like the kind of guy and i dont trust him. also lots and lots and lots of property damage
- Blood Moon - only 1 individual - oh no wait make that 2 aw damn i actually liked that guy rip
- Literally everyone else at a nice 0 - Cyber, Slime, Horse (seriously why is he called horse thats so dumb maybe ill have my own kill count just because his name is dumb)
“Uh. Ignore some of the notes,” Blaze said awkwardly as Impulse gave him a questioning glance. He debated letting Blaze know that Bdubs only picked that name because he lost a bet with Joel. He decides against it.
“Surprised Bolt isn’t second,” Impulse muttered. The Goat had a fearsome reputation for good reason, however the maniacal lightning-slinging egotist was considered a loose cannon for even better reason.
He was the one who had roped Ghost into the infamous cargo ship heist from a few months ago, which had ended in flames, billions of dollars lost, and a low-quality photo circulating the internet of the two villains recreating that one Titanic scene.
“We’re the boat boys now!” Joel had said gleefully, slinging an arm around Etho’s shoulders as he rolled his eyes fondly, news footage playing in the background.
“Oh, what an intimidating name,” Impulse smiled. “I’m trembling in fear.” Joel flipped him off, then yelped as Etho faded from view, causing him to tumble onto the floor.
“He’s definitely severely injured a lot of people, but this list is for actual kills.” Blaze’s voice brought him back to the present.
Impulse hummed in acknowledgement.
“It’s weird, isn’t it?” Sheep put in. “Like, not even the agency cares enough about you guys to make lists like this. Blaze is just weird.”
“You’re weird.” Blaze shot back. “You literally named yourself after a farm animal.” He paused for a moment. “Also– you better not mention any of this to the agency,” Blaze said suddenly, pointing at Sheep and gesturing towards Impulse at the word ‘this’.
“My lips are firmly sealed,” Sheep replied with a mischievous glint in his eyes. He grabbed a screwdriver off the desk and poked it into the device. It sparked immediately, causing him to yelp.
“What is that device, anyway?” Impulse asked.
Sheep looked up in surprise, glanced back down at his hands as if to confirm he was, in fact, holding a device, then smiled. “It’s a secret,” he winked at Impulse conspiratorially.
Blaze sighed. “Probably something that he’s gonna forget to test before giving it to me and then it’s gonna blow up in my face while I’m out on patrol. Again.”
“That was one time—“
“It was twice!” Blaze yelled, holding up two fingers to emphasize his point.
“That was two times—“
“If you wanna explodificate me while I’m on the job, I’m just saying, Zed, there are better ways to–” Blaze stopped suddenly. Impulse’s eyes widened. Sheep leaned back, raising his eyebrows.
“Oh? You’re calling me Zed now? Alright then—“
Blaze’s shoulders slumped, knowing exactly what was coming and resigned himself to his fate.
“Tango.”
The hero glared at Zed. “I hate you,” he said flatly.
Impulse looked between the two, impulsively (ha) making a decision he could never come back from. “I’m Impulse,” he said, reaching a hand out.
The hero glanced at him, bewildered, before grinning widely and shaking his hand in return. “Tango,” he said.
“I know.” Impulse said, and Blaze— no, Tango— laughed.
After a few minutes to get used to the fact they now all knew each other’s real names (Zed had gasped in delight after realizing what the ‘i’ on his costume meant), Tango busied himself with tidying up the medical supplies on the table. “So, the plan: you’ll stay here with us until you’re fully healed– NO doing any crimes or whatever until then, okay? Can’t have you tearing out those stitches yet.”
“I don’t have stitches though?”
“Metaphorical stitches.”
“And, y’know, I do have a home of my own to go to…” Impulse trailed off as Tango dismissively waved a hand through the air.
“No you don’t,” Tango said. Impulse blinked, taken aback. Zed snorted.
“Uh–”
“It’s fine! We’ve got spare blankets and pillows,” Tango patted Impulse’s shoulder in what he guessed was supposed to be a comforting way.
Zed started giggling. “Oh, Skizz is gonna lose his MIND.”
“Who’s Skizz?” Impulse sighed internally. You would think if he was going to stay here for a while, these two buffoons would at least tell him all the details of this living arrangement.
“Our other roommate!” Tango beamed. “You’ll love him, don’t worry. Plus, he should be getting home any minute now.”
Almost as soon as the words left his mouth, they heard heavy footsteps from right outside the front door. Tango and Zed perked up.
The door opened. “I’m home!” A voice carried through the rooms as footsteps drew closer. “Hey, Top, I heard you got into a fight with Cyber earlier today, are you o–”
A man rounded the corner and froze. Zed stifled a giggle. Impulse put on the politest smile he could manage as who he assumed was Skizz stared at him, the ugly cut across his chest and his magenta glasses, then at the outfit laid out on the chair, then back to Impulse, eyes bulging out of their sockets.
“Hello!” Impulse waved.
Skizz dropped the grocery bags he was holding, Tango and Zed laughed, and even though his chest still hurt like hell, Impulse thought to himself: maybe everything will be alright.