Actions

Work Header

Cooking Lessons with Mama and Hermanita

Summary:

Vee is bored. Really bored. Really, really, really bored. So bored, in fact, that she willingly decides to ask her Mama Camila to teach her the art of cooking things in a way that doesn't end with the house burning down.


Reviews from real readers of "Cooking Lessons with Mama and Hermanita" have this to say!

  • "Even if the powers that be didn't name the actual second installment Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money, it's a comfort to see someone keeping the faith"
  • "Bananas!"
  • "six sevennnnnn"

Notes:

This work was made as part of the 2026 edition of the Hello, Fellow Human! Vee Fan-zine. Check it out here, where you can see all the other cool stuff people made: https://veefanzine.neocities.org/2026

Work Text:

It was a cold and rainy day in Gravesfield, Connecticut, and one certain basilisk was busy doing a whole lot of nothing. Vee was staring out the window as the rain pitter-pattered against the glass, and she was getting really freaking bored of watching Raindrop Races Part 739. Exhaling harshly, she flipped around to tear her eyes away from the window. She wanted something to do. She needed something to do. Something fun. Something she had never done before.

Groaning in annoyance at how freaking bored she was, Vee decided to go check on the rest of the family to see if they were doing anything interesting. Trudging down the stairs with heavy steps, Vee looked at her options. Luz, her beloved sister and partner-in-crime, was sitting cross-legged on the floor watching a Good Witch Azura movie. Vee had already seen that one... five times now? Maybe it was six. The exact number eluded her, but it was definitely more than the movie's quality actually warranted. Mama Camila, meanwhile, was busy in the kitchen. She had all manner of pots and pans and ingredients strewn about on the countertop and stove, and she was In The Zone. Man, whatever that was smelled delicious.

Hmmm... Decisions, decisions.

Vee looked at her sister and the 6.7/10 movie.

Vee looked at her mama and the cooking wizardry going on.

The choice was obvious.

"Hey, uhh, Camila?" Vee called out as she finally descended the steps.

The mother looked up from the pot she was tending and smiled. "Look who's finally joining the rest of the family. Thought you were never gonna come out of your room."

"Got bored," Vee said flatly. "I... Uhhh... Is there anything I can do to... help you with dinner?"

If you asked Camila, she would say that her response to that question was a very normal-volume, laid back, "Sure! I could definitely use some help." In reality, though, the mother let out an ear-piercing squeal of joy at the prospect of finally getting to share the wonders of cooking with one of her girls.

"Oh, I've been waiting for a day like this!" Camila said. "Yes, yes! Oh, I have so many things I can show you and teach you!"

Vee shook her head and smiled at how enthusiastic her mama was. "Alright. How do I start... helping."

Camila rubbed her hands together as she let out a happy noise. "Well, right now I'm working on a... Wait... Luz!"

"What?!" came a shout from the living room. A second later, the sound of the Azura movie was paused, cut off mid-monologue.

"Get in here!" Camila called out. "You're joining this too!"

Luz groaned as she slowly got up off the floor. "It was just about to get to the scene where Azura and Hecate nearly accidentally kiss during the masquerade ball. This better be a good reason."

"Come, come," her mother said. "You and your sister are getting some cooking lessons."

"I know how to cook," Luz retorted. "I can make... a grilled cheese. And... uhh... cookies. And... Ummm... Uhhh..."

Camila's flat expression said more than enough. "Right. Because grilled cheese and cookies is going to be your whole diet when you're off on your own. You two -" Camila looked to Vee and Luz "- won't be able to just rely on your mother's cooking for the rest of your lives."

Luz opened her mouth to protest, but upon realizing she had zero snappy comebacks available she resorted to just awkwardly saying, "Okay, yeah. That's smart."

Camila chuckled and smiled. "I'm smarter than I look, I know. Now," she clapped her hands together twice, "which one of you wants to help me with prepping some chicken?"

Luz was busy at everything strewn out on the stove and kitchen counter. She swore she recognized the ingredients, but she couldn't recall the name for the life of her what this was all reminding her of. "Hey, mama? Is this... uh.. what is it... locrio de pollo?"

"Close," Camila responded. "We're making pollo guisado. Still a chicken dish, but different flavors and textures and the like."

Luz blushed, then looked at her mother and then down at the three chicken thighs laying ready for the marinade. "Those things are giant."

"Each of us gets a whole thigh, so you best be hungry," Camila replied. "Vee, how about you? Do you want to help me with prepping the marinade?"

Vee was caught off guard at first, but quickly smiled. "Oh, yeah! What do you want me to do, Camila?"

"How about you chop up the peppers and your sister can work on the onions and garlic?" Camila suggested. "That way you both can contribute to the marinade."

Once Luz realized what task she had been assigned, her mouth dropped open. "What?! Why do I have to chop the onions? Vee's the one whose human form doesn't have tear ducts! Do you want me to cry all over the food?"

"I can give myself tear ducts if you want me to," Vee said with a smirk. "Then I can cry so hard. Do you want me to show you?"

Luz pursed her lips. "Shut up," she responded, though there was no malice in her words. She was just mighty peeved that she got the icky crying-inducing onions.

"Girls, girls, relax," Camila requested. "Luz, you're a big girl. You can handle yourself just fine. Now, Vee?"

"Yeah, mama?" the basilisk responded.

"You chop up the peppers into fine little pieces, okay? We don't want giant chunks. Same goes for you, Luz. Small little bitty pieces. Comprendo?"

Both daughters nodded in unison. Camila smiled. "Good. Now, let's get started. You two working on prepping the veggies, and I'll get the chicken cooking. Then, we'll bring it all together into yummy deliciousness."

Ducking down below the stove, Camila grabbed two pairs of cutting boards and knives. Handing a pair to each child, she stepped back to watch them work. "Be careful, both of you. Don't want anybody losing fingers tonight."

"I can just grow mine back if anything goes wrong," Vee commented as she grabbed a bell pepper. "But, thanks mama. I'll be safe."

"I'm gonna be not safe!" Luz countered. She jabbed the knife outwards twice in her sister's direction. "Stabby stabby! I'm eeevilllll."

Vee looked down at the blade and then rolled her eyes. "Yeah, sure. I'm more scared of mama's slipper. You're too nice to be evil."

"Boo, spoilsport," Luz replied. When it was clear that her sister dearest wasn't in the mood for playing with dangerous cooking utensils, Luz finally turned her attention to her assigned task. "Onion, prepare to meet your maker," she said dramatically as she tried and failed to slice it in half.

Vee snickered beside her. "Doing great, sis," she said sarcastically. "Really showing that onion who's boss."

The basilisk had already cleanly split her pepper into quarters and was working on making them into thin strips. "I can switch with you if the onions and stuff actually are gonna make you cry, though. Tear ducts, noses, that kinda stuff can be morphed away in an instant."

"Nah, I'm good," Luz said as she finally managed to cleave the onion in half, catching one portion that was trying to roll of the cutting board with a "No you don't!"

"Alright, suit yourself." Vee finished slicing her second quarter of pepper and scooted it to the side of her cutting board with the flat of the blade.

Camila didn't bother to hide the smile on her face as she watched her daughters work. "Those are looking great, both of you," she said as she seasoned her pot and prepped it with oil before adding in the chicken thighs. Her abuela's recipe never had a set time for how long things were supposed to cook, so she guesstimated around 10 minutes would be good for her purposes.

"Thanks, Mama," both girls said at the same time. "Stop copying me," they again said in unison.

"Quit copying --," Vee started, but she was cut off by her sister.

"BANANA!" Luz shouted. "Hah! Boom! Weren't expecting that, were you?!" The girl then burst out into giggles.

Vee tried to keep a straight face but her stoic front cracked instantly and she let out a few small laughs as she shook her head. "Banana? Buh - Really? What?"

"Never doubt a non sequitur," Luz said as she returned to chopping her onions as if nothing was out of the ordinary.

"Alright, you two, relax," Camila said. "We don't need any horsing around when both of you have dangerous weapons in your hands."

The two daughters both relented and returned to their chopping and slicing. Vee was the first fo finish by just a few seconds. It definitely was not a race between the two, though, at least according to Luz. Once Luz had finished her onions and garlic, the two looked to their mother for the next steps.

"Now we're gonna work on combining both of your hard works into the broth so that we can soak the chicken in all those flavors," Camila explained. "Plus, it'll give one of you a chance to get back to your movie," she said, looking pointedly at her human daughter. "Though, I think we could all watch it together if you're willing to give us a catch up summary, Luz."

That caught Luz off guard as she slid her onions and garlic into the mixing bowl. "You... want to watch Azura? Who are you and what have you done with the sci-fi only loving Camila Noceda?"

"I can branch out," Camila countered. "I'm not allowed to only be a fan of one genre, you know."

"Hmmm... Fair," Luz eventually replied. "So, do we just... let this simmer or whatever and then come back in an hour?"

"More like half an hour, but essentially yes. We want the chicken to be nice and tender before serving it up," Camila said. Looking into her own pot, though, she saw the chicken still had a few more minutes to cook before it was ready to go into the broth. "How about you two girls go get comfy on the couch, and then I'll join you in a bit? These next few steps are just combining things and getting stuff hot. Not much fun for three whole people."

"Oh, really? I was kinda having fun," Vee lamented. "But, I guess I can go watch Luz's cheesy movie."

"Cheesy?" Luz said with a gasp. "Good Witch Azura 5: The Quest for Moar Moolah is a perfectly non-cheesy movie."

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that," Vee said with a chuckle, but she followed her sister into the living room regardless.

Flopping down onto the couch, Luz kicked her feet up on the coffee table and resumed the movie. "So, this is part is... you know the whole...thing with Azura and Hecate, right? Like friends to enemies to friends and stuff?"

"You only talk about it like every day," Vee commented as she joined her sister on the couch, morphing into her basilisk form as she got comfy. "'Hecazura is the best ship in the history of ever!'" Vee said, copying her sister's voice perfectly. "This is the big masquerade ball scene, right?"

Luz nodded aggressively. "Yeah! This is just after the big confrontation between Hecate and her big boss dude who wants her to double cross Azura, but Hecate was not having any of his bullsh -- bull hockey and she tells him to kick rocks."

"Nice save," Vee said quietly as she nudged Luz with an elbow. "Mom totally doesn't know what you were gonna say."

Luz stuck out her tongue. "I don't know what you could be insinuating, dear sister. I'm a little angel who cannot even think a swear word."

"I know what you were thinking," Camila called out from the kitchen as she finally got the chicken simmering in the broth. Wiping her hands dry on a fresh hand towel, the mother joined her daughters in the living room. Taking her spot at the love seat, she leaned back in the chair and crossed her legs. "Turn up the volume, would you?"

Abiding by her mother's request, Luz jabbed at the Volume Up button on the remote a few times, before having to take it down one notch so that it was at a nice multiple of 5. "There we go," she said. "That better, Mama?"

"Perfect," Camila replied. "Food should be ready in... say, 30 minutes or so."

"Yummyyyyy," Vee said ina sing-song voice. "Can't wait, Mama. Hope our hard work pays off."

"I do too," Camila said with a smile. "Now, hit play!" After a beat, she added. "But no popcorn before dinner."

"Aww, but what if I wanted dessert before dinner?" Luz countered.

Camila silenced her with a look of pure maternal disappointment.

"Point taken," Luz said quickly. "Okay, movie time it is!" Pointing the remote at the TV, she pressed play.


Two fakeout Hecate and Azura kisses, three purple prose-ridden conversations, and one super totally epic battle later, Camila let out a groan as she slowly got off the couch. "Need to go check on the food," she announced as she crossed into the kitchen. "Keep the movie playing. I can listen."

"Ooooohhhh," Luz said, her voice high pitched. "Is someone a fan of Azura all of the sudden? How's the food looking?"

"It's good," Camila replied, lifting the lid off the pot and peeking inside. Grabbing a pair of forks, she found the chicken pulling apart with barely any effort. Smiling to herself, Camila set the forks to the side and then used a spoon to grab a taste of the broth. It was immaculate.

"Do ya mean the food or the movie?" Vee inquired. "Because I can't believe Luz isn't destroying a toilet with how cheesy this movie is."

"Both can be true," Camila replied. Grabbing some black pepper, she gave it a solid grind over the stew to add that extra bit of flavor to its profile. "Now, once that scene finishes up, both of you get back here. This is looking perfecto. Abuela would be so proud."

"Yes, food!" Vee cried out as she hopped off the couch and jogged into the kitchen. "I am starving," she said as she slid into her seat at the table.

Pausing the movie mid-sentence, Luz dropped the remote off on the coffee table as she slowly walked into the kitchen. "Okay, firstly: I took my Lactaid pill so, uhhh, I can handle the cheesy dialogue, thank you very much. And secondly, didn't you literally have a Hexes Hold'em card at lunch?"

Vee blew a raspberry in response. "I'm a growing basilisk, so I need all the food I can get. Plus, only having the magic cards and nothing else would be like if you could only ever eat... I dunno... salads or something. Would you live? Yeah. Would you get sick of it after a while? Also yeah."

Luz snorted out her nose as she sat next to her sister. "Touche."

"You two..." Camila said, trailing off. "You two bicker like you've been siblings your whole lives and not just a few years."

"Yeah, we got that chemistry," Luz replied, doing a little shoulder shimmy as she grinned at her sister.

"I'm the magical shapeshifter from another dimension, and yet you're the goofy, crazy, extroverted one," Vee said as Camila placed a bowl of the guisado in front of her. Grabbing her spoon, she dunked it in the stew and sloshed everything around to mix it all up.

"Well, someone has to bounce off your... chill-ness," Luz replied.

Camila deposited the next bowl in front of her human daughter before grabbing one for herself and returning to the table. Sitting opposite the two girls, she settled into her seat. Scooting up a little closer, she relished the smells of the guisado and memories that came with it. Grabbing her spoon, she sliced a chunk of chicken in half, scooped up some veggies and a bit of the broth, and brought it to her mouth.

It tasted like home.

Looking to her children as they took their own first bites, Camila hoped they would get that same heart-warming feeling as she did when they shared the kitchen with their own kids.