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It’s a calm day in Ponyville, surprisingly. The sun shines bright, the freshly cut grass holds a familiar scent. Each pony is off doing their own hobbies and activities. Or more specifically, Rarity. Rarity sits at home, feeling as down as a mole in soil and working on a new spring collection for all of her friends. At the moment, she’s working on a gorgeous outfit for Applejack. It’d be unfair to make something for all of her friends except Applejack, no matter how much her broken heart protested it. She winces and her heart aches as she lays out her pattern on the luminous green fabric. She couldn’t help but think about how well it’ll compliment Applejack’s apple green eyes.
She lets herself flash back to her face for a second before she shakes it away. It’s difficult for Rarity to do anything without thinking of her. And Rarity always thinks of her.
In the deep of night, when Princess Luna brings up the bright moon, Rarity likes to sit outside and look at it. The stars and the moon. It comforts her to envision that Applejack is looking at the exact same night sky that she is. It makes her feel like they’re more connected in a way. Like they aren’t miles apart having not spoken in three weeks.
Around a month ago, Rainbowdash had come to Rarity with an issue. One that she wasn’t quite sure how to solve.
“I like Applejack. Like like, Applejack. I know you’re one of her closer friends so I thought you might have some advice on what I should do y’know? Not that I’m scared or anything because I’m not! I just don’t know if she already likes somepony or anything…” Rainbow had confided to Rarity, with a kind of nervousness that Rainbow generally didn’t carry in her words.
Rarity had been gobsmacked. She had no idea what to say. She had always thought she’d be the one to tell Applejack she liked her. Loved her. The first day Rarity had met Applejack she was completely infatuated. Those feelings she began with had only increased in the following years of getting to know her. But she never had the nerve to confess. That, she supposed, was her own fault. Despite all of this, Rarity just wants all her friends to be happy. Even if it means that she’ll regret it, and be unhappy for years to come.
“I think you have a chance as good as anypony. If not more. You should tell her how you feel.” Rarity encouraged her good friend.
Even if it meant her and Applejack never being together, at least two of her friends would be happy together. That’s what she told herself. Minute after minute, hour after hour, day after day, week after week. She’s happy as long as her friends are. She could learn to live by herself. But could she really?
But no matter how badly she tried to push it down the following three weeks she just couldn’t.
Rarity lets out a shaky breath as she sinks the scissors into the fabric. As she continues cutting it out, she feels her tied connection with Applejack cutting as well. She has to get over here. Doesn’t she? Would it make her feel better about losing the one pony she’d been pining over for years?
“But if I’d see you, I’d fall apart…”
“Okay, darlings! I have all the dresses finished for you guys. The one and only, new and improved, spring collection. All for my most treasured ponies.” Her eyes glance to Applejack as she says this. “I hope you like them, I tried my best.” Rarity tries hard to hold down her pride. She knows her friends have to love them, they’re specifically tailored to all of them, inspired by their cutie marks.
“Heck yeah, Rarity! These are awesome. Especially mine, you’ve really out done yourself!” Rainbowdash exclaims, making Rarity blush proudly. Rainbow’s praises are one and few.
“Is she all that you want?”
“What Rainbow said, these are amazing Rare. You did a great job. I think I speak for all of us when I say these are…wow. Perfect.” Applejack says while staring into Rarity’s eyes. Everypony starts to agree and compliment Rarity’s handiwork. Rarity feels her heart skip a beat.
No. No. That’s not right. Rarity tells herself. She’s not mine. She never will be. Those words hit Rarity with outstanding weight. She feels her smile falter. Assuming no pony notices, she excuses herself for some fresh air.
She breathes in the deep fresh air of Ponyville. She’s always loved this town, but lately it's starting to feel more and more suffocating. It’s like no matter how deeply she exhales and inhales, she can’t seem to catch her breath. Most of that is due to the massive weight of putting others before herself on her chest.
She picks a pretty yellow flower from the floor with her hoof. ‘She loves me’ ‘she loves me not’ ‘she loves me’ ‘she loves me not’ ‘she loves me’. Yeah, right. She throws the stem to the dirt and stomps on it in a fury, tears welling in her eyes. Why was she acting so childish? This isn’t the Rarity she knows at all.
“Is she all that you need?”
“Rarity?” A voice behind her says. Rarity wipes away the tears and looks behind her. Twilight Sparkle.
“Hello, Twilight. Do you require my presence for something?” She sniffles.
“No, not at all. Just checking in on you, you seem upset. Are you feeling okay?” Twilight rests her hoof on Rarity’s shoulder.
Rarity is conflicted. She could tell Twilight. Or, she could keep it to herself. But the concern in Twilight’s eyes is enough to make Rarity cave in. It’s eating her from the inside out to be keeping it to herself. She needs to tell somebody.
Tears begin to drip from Rarity’s wide eyes, mascara smearing down her face. “Oh Twilight, it’s just horrid. I don’t even KNOW where to begin. I think I waited too long and made a mistake. I really really like Applejack. I’d even go as far to say that I love her. I can’t imagine a life without her in it. She’s the most special pony I’ve ever met. But, a few weeks ago Rainbow told me she had a crush on Applejack. I could’ve said something, but I told her to go for it!” Sobs escape Rarity’s mouth. She doesn’t know what to think or do. “Twilight, please! What do I do! I am ever so fond of her and I don’t know if I can live like this!” Each word takes small bits of pressure off Rarity. She has to admit, it does make her feel a little better.
“Well, have you tried talking to either of them about this?” Twilight tilts her head. Rarity bites her lip and looks at the ground. She hasn’t.
“I don’t know if I can. Every time I try to discuss this, it makes me just so upset.” Another cry comes from her mouth.
“If you don’t talk to them about how you feel, nothing will change. Maybe Applejack feels the same way. I believe in you. I know Rainbow would understand as well. Even if it doesn’t work out, we’re all still here as your friends.” She offers a reassuring smile and pulls Rarity into a hug.
A pit of doubt plants itself in Rarity’s stomach. And with the right amount of overthinking, it waters it just enough to cause it to grow and spread throughout her every vein. Just enough to take control of her entire body and brain.
A thought appears in Rarity’s head. She should move. She could move to Canterlot and start up a boutique of some sort. The thought of leaving her friends saddens her. But she believes it might be what she needs. Maybe this will make her feel better.
She’d definitely miss her friends, but she could come visit. Occasionally. The idea of leaving just to avoid confronting her troubled feelings about Rainbowdash and Applejack feels very selfish, but why shouldn’t she be? She spends so much time putting other people before herself. She’s never minded it of course, it makes her happy to do so much for other people. But for once in her life, she wants to do something for herself.
So, days after talking to Twilight, she makes her decision. She’ll move. It’s a bigger city so it means she’ll have more opportunities. More customers. She can become successful. But is that really what she wants?
No, but it’ll have to do. The other ponies will be okay without her. With that, she packs up all of her stuff carefully with ease. Except by the time she’s done, boxes are stacked up everywhere. She never realized she had so much stuff. She grabs a picture frame to set in the last box.
It’s a picture of her and Applejack, looking so happy. So young. Applejack’s arm is around Rarity and they both have the biggest smiles on their faces.
Her happiest moments are always when she’s by her side. By all of her friends' sides.
This thought almost seems to trigger a knock at the door. Rarity whips her head around and her heart beats in her ears. She hasn’t told anyone yet that she’s moving. She knows that if they find out they’ll try to convince her not to, at first anyway. She knows that her friends will support her in any decision she ultimately decides to make. If her friends beg her to stay though, she wouldn’t be able to say no. Making this choice was already challenging enough, but facing her friends head on would be on a completely different level. Too much for her to bear, tears would flow immediately.
“Rarity?” A southern accent drawls from behind her front door. Applejack.
Panic sets in and Rarity looks around, empty of ideas. She’ll just peek through the door. Rarity opens the door by an inch or two, and peeks her eye through.
“Hey! Applejack…darling. I’m just working on a surprise collection. You can’t come in.” She stutters out, scrounging for ideas in her head.
“Oh…uh well that’s alrighty. I was just wondering if I could maybe talk to you somewhere…?” Applejack mutters nervously. She tries to sneak a peek of Rarity’s house through the crack of the door. She spots several boxes.
Boxes? Applejack thinks to herself. That’s odd.
“Rarity, let me come on in. Please?” Applejack pleads.
Rarity sighs and opens the door, then walks away from it.
“Rare, what is all this? You’ve packed up all yur stuff?” Her eyebrows furrow and she looks to Rarity for an explanation of some sort.
“I… I’m moving, Applejack.” Rarity flinches, waiting for a response.
“Oh, awesome sauce! To a different house further into Ponyville or somethin? That’s smart. You’ll be closer to business. Every pony will be lookin forward to that!” A grin makes its way onto Applejack’s face.
Rarity gives a small smile, she doesn’t want to disappoint Applejack.
“Well…how are things going with Rainbowdash?” Rarity messes with one of the boxes to look busy.
“Ah. That’s actually what I came here to talk to ya about. I uh… I like Rainbowdash. She’s a really good friend. That’s really all she is. I felt bad turning her down, but she took it pretty well. So all of y’all should be good. No awkward moments and stuff y’know?” Applejack gets quieter at the end of her sentence. For a second, Rarity feels her heart soar. She turned Rainbowdash down. She doesn’t like her. Maybe… “But I wanted to talk to ya because I think I do like someone…even though it’s not Rainbow. I just…don’t know what to do. I just uh…maybe I should tell ‘er, right?” The wings of her heart suddenly take an arrow straight through them.
She thought it couldn’t get any worse, but Applejack likes someone after all.
“Yeah, that’s a good idea. Be honest with your feelings.” Rarity forces a joyous look onto her face. Or at least what she hopes looks like joy.
“Are ya?” Applejack’s face is void of any emotion. Staring right at Rarity like she knows something that even she doesn’t.
“Always.” She lies straight through her teeth. Applejack sighs, “Okay, Rarity.”
What was that? She sounds…irritated? Or frustrated? But why? Rarity glances from Apple to her feet. Should she say something? Is it worth it? Apple said she likes someone. Surely it’s not Rarity. Right? But…if Rarity is moving away anyway, shouldn’t she tell her before she leaves.
Just so she knows.
“Apple! Darling, wait… I want to say something.” Rarity stumbles over her words and feels her cheeks turning pink.
Applejack turns around, something like hope plastered across her face.
“I know this might not be the right time to say this, but I’m not staying in Ponyville. I think I’m going to try out Canterlot. There are a lot of things for me there.” She tries to read Apple’s face, which is contorted into something like pain.
“But…why?” Genuine confusion laces her voice.
Rarity thinks on it for a moment. Maybe this is the moment. She’ll tell her. Get it off her chest before she leaves. But when she opens her mouth, the words she formed in her head aren’t the words that come out. “I have to go Apple. It’s just what I need right now. I’ll be back one day I bet. I just need a change of scenery or something! I don’t know…” Rarity sighs. She should’ve just confessed to Applejack. Isn’t that what she wants? She turned Rainbow down, this is her chance isn’t it?
“I-i understand…I’ll leave you to it then and see you soon.” Applejack’s face of agony is apparent, so Rarity turns around. She needs to sort her brain out and figure out what she wants to do first.
So, later that night, she moves. No warning, no goodbye. She’d be back soon hopefully, she just needs a little time.
A month passes, painfully. Rarity goes under an apprenticeship with a fashion designer, and learns a lot. Her apprenticeship lasts only a month. A quick one, but it was all she could afford at the moment. She’d been selling a lot of her creations with a lot of the city ponies and business has been okay.
Deep in her heart, she missed making clothes for her friends. They had mailed her a few times since the move, but Rarity has yet to open one. The wound still feels fresh and reading it this soon feels like rubbing salt in it.
Yet, that evening, after a long day of sewing at the studio, she goes home to find something shocking waiting for her. She checks her mailbox and a messy letter lays there, stamped with wax in the shape of an apple. Applejack.
This is the first time she’s mailed Rarity since their last conversation.
“I’d be there in a hurry…”
What could she possibly have to say to her? Oddly enough, Rarity feels ready to open the letter. Sort of. Part of it terrifies her. But this past month, she’s hardly slept. Mind always awake, being accompanied by the thought of Applejack.
The way she left things haunts her, lost confession still on her tongue. But that alone convinces her, doesn’t she at least owe Applejack that?
Decision made, she’d open it. So, Rarity settles down on her lavish purple chair, holding the envelope with her hooves.
Breath shaking, she rips the top of it off carefully. Inside, is a folded up piece of paper. Heart pounding, Rarity unfolds it. Eyes, scan the paper top to bottom immediately.
“Heya Rarity! Long time no see. I know it’s been a while and I’ve been writing this letter mentally for the past month that you’ve been gone. I haven’t been doin well, but I’m too much a coward to work up the courage to say somethin to you. But now I have, and I feel I have to say something because I want you to come back, Rarity. I miss you.
Rarity, you’re the caramel to my apple and the apple of my eye. You’re the sweetest most generous pony I’ve ever known. It shocks me all that you do for others and I admire you so much for it. I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to finally say somethin to you. I thought maybe before you left you would’ve said something, I thought maybe I would’ve. But I wanted to honor and respect the choice you had made for yourself because you deserve it. I’m not great at writing or great at feelings, but I know what I feel, and it’s that I love you, Rarity. I don’t know if you feel the same exactly, but whether or not you do or don’t, I want you to do what’s best for you. But please,
“Baby, come back to me.”
Love, Applejack
What? Rarity couldn’t believe her eyes. She has to go back. Almost immediately, Rarity frantically begins to pack. She has to go back. Now.
In the dead of night, Rarity rushes as quickly as possible. She does everything she can to get herself back to Ponyville. Applejack loves her. And Rarity loves Applejack.
Once she gets into town, she drops her stuff off at her old place before rushing to sweet apple acres. She knocks on the barn door, no caution for the other people that might be sleeping within.
Luckily, a groggy Applejack opens the door. But at the sight of Rarity, her eyes open wide.
“Rarity! What’re you doing here?” Applejack’s voice is filled with surprise and confusion.
“I got your letter, darling. I had to come as soon as possible.” Rarity’s frantic words confused Applejack.
She grabs one of Rarity’s hooves. “Slow down, I didn’t expect you to leave at night, or… at all.”
“I had to! It was urgent. Apple…I. I really really like you. I’ve always been too afraid to tell you. Now knowing you feel the same, I had to tell you. I’m sorry I put it off for so long. That day I left… I was going to tell you but I just couldn’t bring myself to. But I’m telling you now. I don’t even want to spend another day apart. I love you Applejack.” Rarity pours her heart out, giving it every bit of passion that she’s got.
“I know, I love you too. You have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear that, sugarcube. Wanna come inside?” Applejack smiles softly.
Rarity nods vigorously, “Of course.”