Work Text:
Chad and Robert had been dating for a couple of weeks now; nobody knew about them except for them. Knowing how insufferable the Z Team would be when they found out had made the couple not want to say a word.
The plan had been to sort of soft launch it. It was of course Chad’s idea, they had the work group chat usually for letting people know they were running late, planning out the coffee run so no one had to endure SDNs shitty stock, or organising plans to hang out as a team.
Chad had started subtly at first heart reacting to some of Robert’s messages innocuous little things, either no one noticed or they simply heart reacted as well seeming to think it was some sort of prank or a new in joke.
The heart reacts died out fairly quickly after that it didn’t feel great having everyone unintentionally flirting with your boyfriend, so Chad pivoted made it harder to ignore less subtle flirting and more overt ones.
“Robbo did you get lunch yet?”
“Not had the chance yet.”
“Take you to that place you like my treat? 😉👄”
“Hell, yeah Flambae’s getting us all lunch!!!”
The response came from Visi, and he couldn’t help but blame himself for her misconstruing it the offer had been just for Robert a too coy way of saying they were going on a date but now he was saddled with a bill totalling over a $100 because he was too stupid to correct them.
It kept going like that he complimented Robert on a new outfit, and everyone chimed in on how good he did or didn’t look others asked where there compliments were or joked about how they must not look good.
Calling him babe on the comms had everyone laughing at him assuming it was a mistake like when a student calls their teacher mom or dad, but it had been intentional. The downside was now his teammates called Robert babe every now and then just to wind him up. Chad would get frustrated and angry sputtering about it and Robert would simply laugh at hit frustration it only added fuel to the fire.
The next escalation to his attempts at subtly telling the team that they were an item was to be more physically affectionate at work sitting shoulder to shoulder at lunch their knees touching under the table.
“Jeez lad give Bob some room.”
“Yeah, you’re big but you’re not that big.”
The other couple on the team scolded him since it looked liked he’d been hogging all of the space, Robert to his chagrin joined in with them shuffling his seat to the side and adding.
“Taking up the whole table so rude.”
But he winked when he said it and rubbed his foot over his boyfriend's ankle clearly teasing. Chad simply scoffed and ate quicker.
His next move was linking arms with him on the way to his desk.
“Yo Bobert you fall or something?”
“What no I’m fine Sonar.”
“What’s that for then babes?”
Malevola indicated their linked arms.
“Can’t I just be a gentleman?”
The bat and demon laughed at him making a joke about Flambae walking them to their cubbies since he’s such a gentleman, he only rolled his eyes at them for it. Regardless he was begrudgingly linking arms and walking his coworkers to their locations for the next week.
Holding hands had people joking about him getting lost and needing a leader, a kiss on the cheek and the team acted like it was some new reward system that Rob was doing for those at the top of the leaderboard it made him laugh but if anyone had come close to unseating him, he didn’t want to imagine that they’d be there getting cheek kisses from his boyfriend. Not when they didn’t know that they were together.
“Chad just tell them. It’s getting ridiculous now.”
“Robbo you’ve not seen what they do when one of us starts seeing someone.”
“It can’t be that bad. You’ve been letting them humiliate you every day for weeks now.”
“Okay last time Sonar mentioned he was seeing someone they doxxed her and sent 100s of bats to her house as a prank since she liked “bats.””
“Fuck...alive?”
“Bitch no plastic. Malevola’s last girlfriend was set up for a bunch of satanic mailing lists, the boyfriend before her was subscribed to a horns and tails delivery company, for all I know he might still be getting them...dunno who’s paying that subscription fee.”
“But it’s us Bae. They know us they’ll just laugh, make fun of us for a week and it’ll be old news.”
“No! They have to figure it out themselves let it go on long enough that it’s not funny anymore.”
Robert sighed in frustration rolled his eyes at his boyfriend then kissed him. Rob might think he was being ridiculous, but he was just being smart.
Alice was the first to bring up how he’d been going home from the club alone the last few weeks.
“So, what you taken a vow of celibacy or some shit?”
“Bitch what the hell are you on about?”
“Boo this is some serious dry spell, you know you’re a bad bitch could pull any guy you wanted and you keep going home with me or alone.”
Oh, you noticed that.
“Oh, um I guess I’m just taking a break for now. Hadn’t thought about it.”
He felt bad lying but telling the truth saying I’m seeing someone just opened him up to a million questions and even more lies and Ali was smart she knew him too well she’d figure it out straight away before he could drop enough hints.
Two weeks later they were planning more drinks when he let things slip a little bit.
“Can’t got a hot date.”
He cast a glance to Robert and winked either they would all finally, finally realise that they were a couple or they would make more dumb jokes or they would miss it somehow even with him making it so obvious and exaggerated.
“Thought you were taking a break from hooking up with guys?”
“Yeah...I, I um breaks over?”
He shrugged then he sounded about as confident as Waterboy did when he first joined up. He’d expected for someone to drill him on it figure out where, when and who with but they let it drop mercifully.
Him and Robert sipped red wine at an Italian restaurant that evening his boyfriend looked incredible in jeans a shirt and tie with a sports jacket, he had hoped by now that the team would have figured it out but Alice was texting him asking for pics of the guy, Bruno was complaining that the club with boring without their resident fire starter, he even had a text saying ditch the date.
His phone went on silent after that as he focused back on his handsome boyfriend even go so far as to be sappy and split a tiramisu with him for dessert making a show of licking cream off of the spoon while making a promise about getting his cream filling later.
A month of him dropping every hint under the sun that Robert and him were more than just coworkers, more than friends, more than just fucking dating they were a couple monogamous all that good shit and the team still hadn’t got it.
He was getting fed up with it by now because they could hardly be this oblivious, Alice had to know by now seriously she could read him like a book usually at this point it was just bizarre for her to be in the dark and guilt washed over him so often for not having told her about them.
Robert had told Chase but sworn him to secrecy explaining that he couldn’t handle the sneaking around anymore not with the man who practically raised him, even Mandy knew but that for work purposes they’d needed to fill out paperwork make sure it wasn’t going to be an issue.
It was team drinks at the club and Chad had had probably one too many Phoenix’s and was feeling pretty tipsy when he decided enough was efuckingnough and simply grabbed Robert.
He pulled him to the dance floor making a show of dancing with him but it could more accurately be described as dancing on him the way he ground his hips against his man, before turning to face him.
Chad kissed him like a man possessed sucking on Rob’s lips, licking between them until he was sucking on his tongue or licking along it, they kissed until he was breathless drunk on more than just the cocktail.
When he finally parted for air it was to the sound of cheering from the team mixed in with several fucking finally’s and I called it. Robert was more sober than him as he laughed.
“Yeah, so we’ve been together about two months now.”
Courtney spoke up in faux shock.
“What nooo we had no idea.”
Alice chimed in.
“Yeah, bitch we’ve known this whole time.”
Chad stood absolutely dumb founded.
“Why the fuck didn’t any of you say anything?!”
He’d put up with weeks of those silly digs for no reason?
“Dude we were waiting for you to tell us.” “Yeah, we were being nice.” “We wanted to let you wait until you were ready.”
Several of them were speaking at once overlapping each other. Robert led them to a booth Chad sat beside his boyfriend draping an arm around his shoulders and snuggling close to him.
“When did you guys figure it out?”
“I mean the heart emojis were clue number one, then the lunch offer. I mean it was a dead give away you walking arm in arm.”
Courtney answered his question; sneaky bitch played me for food.
“Ugh so old fashioned and cutesy it made me want to gag.”
Sonar was complaining then, but he didn’t care.
“So, what I’m hearing is my handsome dumb ass, kept this whole soft launch idea going on for way a longer than he needed to?”
“Bitch I hard launched us now, didn’t I?”
“Yes you did, now shut up and kiss me we got weeks to catch up on.”
They kissed in the booth to a symphony of fake gagging or delighted cheering from their team and Chad felt like an idiot for waiting so long to actually kiss his boyfriend in front of them.