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The first time Chan realized Felix had something in his mouth, he was halfway through making his coffee.
“Lix?”
The seal-point Balinese kitten froze from where he was loafing on the kitchen counter. His tail continued to sway contentedly behind him, looking for all the world like the picture of innocence. This wouldn't have alarmed him— of course it wouldn’t have, this was Felix he was thinking about— however, it was 6 in the morning, and he suddenly remembered that Jisung hadn't returned from the pastry shop with their breakfast, so what was in Felix's mouth?
Chan narrowed his eyes.
Felix blinked.
Something silver glinted between his teeth.
“Felix.”
Chan set his mug down. Felix's tail stopped swaying.
His ears twitched when Chan took a step closer to him.
“What have you got?”
The moment Felix was within Chan’s reach, Felix immediately jumped off the counter and bolted.
“HEY! FELIX, COME BACK HERE!”
Felix tore down the hallway, claws skittering against the floor as Chan chased after him. “Lix! Come back!”
Felix, naturally, did not come back. He disappeared around the corner. Chan rounded it two seconds later and found absolutely nothing.
“Where did you—” A tiny giggle came from behind the sofa pressed against the wall. “Felix.” Silence. “Felix, I can see your tail.” The tail in question stopped its swaying and was immediately pulled back to its owner behind the sofa.
Chan sighed, “don't make me get Minho.”
A tiny head peeked over the back of the sofa, revealing an offended-looking Felix though his eyes were filled with mirth.
Eventually, Chan managed to coax him out of his hiding spot, and bribed him to trade his— whatever it was he was chewing with perfectly cut slices of banana. Felix spat out the offending object into Chan's palm. Used to their kitten hybrid dropping random things onto him, Chan didn’t mind the saliva-coated object. Speaking of which, it was a… Chan squinted his eyes, a bottle cap? Chan stared at it. Then at Felix. Then back at the bottle cap, “where did you even get this?” Felix smiled in reply, and Chan felt a headache forming.
That should have been the end of it.
It wasn't.
The next day, Minho found a button underneath Felix's pillow.
The day after that, Jeongin discovered a bottle cap inside one of Felix's slippers.
Then Jisung found a leaf on top of their TV.
Then Hyunjin discovered the missing cap of one of his oil paints in Felix’s jewelry box. Thankfully it was from one of his newer ones that didn’t have a smidge of paint on it. That didn’t stop him from nearly having a heart attack and smothering their kitten when he got home from recording. Felix was surprised but he welcomed the snuggle attack with purrs.
Then Changbin found a coin behind the couch Felix liked to cram himself into for one of his catnaps.
Then Seungmin found two hair ties in the pocket of Felix's hoodie, which wouldn’t be weird except for the fact that Felix had vocalized only accepting hair ties from Hyunjin because “he understands the differences of how each hair tie feels” whatever that means.
“Okay,” Seungmin said slowly, holding them up. “I know the hair ties are technically usable, but why are they in your pocket?” Felix stared at him. Seungmin stared back. “Yongbok-ah.” Felix's ears twitched. “Don't.” Felix grinned. “Don't you dare—” Felix ran. “OH, COME ON!”
The really worrying part was that nobody could figure out where Felix was getting all of this stuff. They didn't leave bottle caps lying around. They didn't leave buttons on the floor. They certainly didn't give him coins. And yet, somehow, every few days, Felix appeared with something new. The worst part was what happened when they tried to take it away. Felix ran. Every. Single. Time. It eventually became a game. Unfortunately, Felix was the only one who knew the rules.
Chan was the easiest to get. Felix could simply walk into the room, sit somewhere he knew Chan could see him, and start chewing suspiciously. Chan would notice. “Lix.” Felix would look at him. “What have you got?” Felix would run.
Jisung was even better. He found the whole thing hilarious. “Felix, what is it?” Felix would stare at him with whatever questionable object was currently in his mouth. Jisung would immediately start laughing, “No, seriously! What is that?” Felix would run. And Jisung would chase him. Usually while laughing so hard he could barely breathe.
Hyunjin was another favorite. Mostly because Hyunjin reacted like Felix had committed a personal betrayal every time. “Felix!” Felix would stop his chewing. Hyunjin would point at him, “Spit it out.” Felix would shake his head. “Why are you like this?” Felix would grin around the object. Hyunjin would gasp, “Are you smirking at me?” Felix would run. “COME BACK!”
Minho, however, was unpredictable. Sometimes Felix got a laugh out of him. Sometimes he got a lecture. And sometimes, if Felix had something particularly questionable in his mouth, Minho would go completely silent. Those were the dangerous days. “Felix.” Felix froze. He called him Felix, not Yongbok. Oh no. Minho held out his hand, “Give it.” Felix stared at him. Minho's expression didn't change. “Now.” Felix slowly opened his mouth. A tiny metal washer dropped into Minho's palm. Minho closed his eyes and sighed. Deeply. “Where did you get this?” Felix looked away. “Felix.” No answer. Minho looked at the others. “I'm going to lose my mind.” Felix simply meowed in response.
🐱
“I'm serious,” Minho said one evening, standing in the middle of the living room with his arms crossed. “He could choke.”
“I know,” Chan said.
“Or swallow something.”
“I know.”
“Or get sick.”
“I know.”
“Then why does he still have access to bottle caps?”
Chan opened his mouth. Closed it. Opened it again, “I… don't know.”
Minho rubbed his forehead, “I am getting gray hairs because of this cat.”
Felix, said cat, who was lying innocently on the floor nearby, looked up. His ears perked when Minho pointed at him.
“Don't.”
Felix blinked.
“Don't even think about it.”
Felix tilted his head, maintaining eye contact with Minho.
Minho narrowed his eyes.
Chan watched the exchange with growing suspicion. Why would Felix, someone who thrives off of compliments, suddenly act out…
“Wait,” Everyone looked at him, “I think he's doing it on purpose.”
Felix's ears twitched before shifting his gaze to Chan. At this point everyone was staring at Chan.
Jisung gasped and hopped up from where he was sitting, “You think he's trolling us?”
“I think,” Chan said carefully, “that he knows we’ll chase him when he has something in his mouth, and is maybe… bored?”
There was a beat of silence.
Hyunjin looked at Felix. Felix looked at Hyunjin. Hyunjin's eyes widened, “Oh my God.” Felix purred with that look in his eyes again. “Oh my God,” Hyunjin repeated, “He's doing it for attention.” Felix's tail flicked happily against the floor.
Minho stared at him, “You little menace.” Felix's grin widened.
The next day was when the hunt for the stash began.
They searched everywhere— Under the couches. Behind the television. Inside cabinets. Under beds. In drawers. In Felix's room. In the laundry basket. Finally, after a long 3 hours, they found it.
They found three bottle caps, four buttons, a broken pencil, two coins, a plastic ring, a shoelace, a mystery key, six hair ties, and something that nobody could identify but that Felix clearly considered precious. They arranged everything on the table. Everyone stared at the collection.
No one said a word for the longest time.
“This is insane,” Changbin whispered.
“Where did he get the key?” Jeongin asked.
“No idea.”
“Whose is it?”
“No idea.”
“What's this?”
“No idea.”
Minho picked up the plastic ring, “Why does he have this?”
“Also no idea.”
Jisung crouched beside the table, “This is like an archaeological dig.”
“Don't touch anything,” Minho said.
“I wasn't going to.”
“You were absolutely going to.”
“I was just looking.”
“You're holding a bottle cap.” Jisung looked down. He was, in fact, holding a bottle cap. He slowly put it back.
The biggest mystery, however, was that Felix's hoard wasn't nearly as large as they expected.
After hours of searching, they had uncovered maybe a dozen questionable treasures. “That can't be everything,” Minho said. Chan nodded, “He has been collecting things for months.” “Maybe he's stopped.” Everyone turned toward Felix. Felix was sitting on the floor, grooming his paw. He looked innocent. Far too innocent. Minho's eyes narrowed. “Yongbok.” Felix continued grooming himself. “Lee Felix Yongbok.”
That prompted Felix to shift back to his human form. He looked at his cat hyung with his doe eyes, “Yes, hyung?”
Minho pointed at the table, “we found your stash.” Felix blinked at him. Then he looked at the collection. Then back at Minho. He smiled. “Don't smile.” Felix smiled wider. Minho sighed. He was definitely getting gray hairs because this cat.
They thought they'd won. They had found the stash. They had gathered everything. They had thrown away the things Felix absolutely shouldn't have had. They even checked his usual hiding places twice. That evening, Minho went to bed feeling cautiously optimistic.
The next morning, Hyunjin walked into the kitchen. He stopped.
He blinked.
Felix blinked back.
“Uhh, guys?” Nobody answered. “GUYS!.” Chan wandered in, “What?” Hyunjin pointed. Felix was sitting on the counter. There was a bottle cap in his mouth. Chan stared. Minho appeared behind him. He stared harder. Jisung came running when he heard the commotion, “No way.” Felix's tail started wagging. Minho slowly walked toward him, “Where did you get that?” Felix backed up. “Don't.” One step back. “Felix.” Another. Jisung was already laughing, “He did it again.”
“He can't have gotten another one,” Changbin said.
“He obviously did.”
“Where was it?”
“That's what we're trying to figure out!”
The maknaes were the last to enter.
Seungmin took one look at nyangnyangracha having a stare down, and everyone else bickering, before quietly turning around and walking away. “No,” Seungmin said, “I’m not doing this.”
Felix’s tail wagged seeing his fellow maknaes and suddenly jumped down.
“YONGBOK!”
The chase was immediate.
Felix shot through the living room.
Changbin lunged. Felix dodged and did a u-turn. Jeongin tried to intercept him from the other side, Felix spun around and sprinted between his legs. Seungmin leaned against the wall, “Stop chasing him.”
Changbin looked at him incredulously, “He's going to swallow it!”
“I know.”
“Then help!”
“No. He'll get more excited.”
Changbin looked up from where he was crouching, “What?”
“He always comes back when he thinks we've given up.”
Jeongin hummed, nodding thoughtfully, “So we ignore him.”
“Exactly.”
The three of them abruptly stopped causing Felix to skid to a halt. He looked back. Nobody moved. Felix seemed confused. Seungmin leaned against the wall and pulled out his phone. Changbin started talking to Jeongin like nothing was happening. Jeongin even yawned. Felix watched them suspiciously. His ears moved forward. Then he started creeping forward. Slowly. One paw at a time. Changbin didn't look at him. Seungmin kept scrolling. Jeongin stared at the ceiling. Felix got closer. And closer. He was almost within reach. Seungmin glanced up. Felix froze. Seungmin immediately looked back at his phone. Felix was practically beside them now. They continued to ignore him. He relaxed. His tail curled lazily behind him.
As he was about to loaf, Seungmin's hand shot out. Felix yelped and leapt backward. Changbin lunged. Felix dodged. Jeongin caught his tail gently, prompting Felix to spin around in surprise. And then— The bottle cap went flying. Everyone froze. The cap landed underneath the couch. Felix immediately dove after it. “No!” Minho grabbed him around the middle and lifted him into the air. Felix dangled, kicking at the air indignantly, yowling half-heartedly.
“Got you.” Felix twisted around to look at his captor. Minho stared directly into his eyes. “Give me the cap.” Felix stared back. “Give.” Felix's cheeks puffed. “Yongbok.” A muffled sound escaped the kitten. Minho sighed, “You are going to be the death of me.” Chan walked over and gently rubbed Felix's head. “Come on, Lix. You know you can't eat those.” Felix's expression softened.
For a moment, he looked genuinely sorry.
Then he opened his mouth.
A small metal button dropped into Minho's hand.
Silence.
Minho stared at the button.
Everyone stared at the button.
Felix looked extremely pleased with himself.
Jisung's mouth fell open before he burst out laughing, “He had another one!”
Hyunjin collapsed against the couch.
Chan covered his face.
Changbin was wheezing beside Jisung.
Jeongin pointed accusingly, “How long was that in there?!”
Seungmin shook his head, “I don't even want to know.”
Minho looked down at Felix. Felix stared back with his big doe, innocent eyes. “You,” Minho said slowly, “are a menace.” Felix purred. “And you're banned from having anything in your mouth that isn't food.” Felix blinked. Minho narrowed his eyes. “I'm serious.” Felix's tail flicked. Then he leaned forward and gave Minho a tiny lick on the nose. Minho froze. The others immediately joined Jisung and Changbin in their laughter. “You can't charm your way out of this!” Felix purred louder.
Later that night, they found another bottle cap. It was sitting neatly in the middle of Felix's bed. Nobody knew where he'd gotten it. Nobody knew where the rest of the stash was. And, judging by the suspicious little grin their kitten gave them from underneath his blanket, they had a feeling they never would.
Chan sighed, “Tomorrow we're checking every room again.”
Minho groaned, “I'm checking Felix first.”
Jisung laughed, “I bet he's got a secret room.”
Hyunjin gasped, “Don't give him ideas.”
Suddenly a quiet, unmistakable jingle was heard.
Everyone went silent.
Minho slowly turned toward Felix, “...What was that?” Felix's ears perked. Chan stared, “Felix.” A tiny metallic sound came again.
Jingle.
Jingle.
Felix's tail began wagging.
Jisung's eyes lit up, “Oh, this is going to be good.”
Felix shot out from underneath his blanket prompting everyone to scream and give chase.
And Felix, the world's happiest little menace, ran down the hallway with his latest treasure clenched safely between his teeth.