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The last view Nimue had before she awoke wasn't through her eyes. It was Killian's, as he died, as Emma broke their curse, she died too.
She remembered how much she screamed at them both to not do it. They couldn't die, there was still work to do, spells to cast, things to do, things to create. People to influence. They needed to find ways to grow as dark ones.
As she recalled her last moments alive, her false heart sped up as she realized how disgusted she was by it. For the first moment in centuries, her thoughts were her own. Not impacted by a curse, or corrupted by the evil magic which previously flowed through her.
Fully waking up now, she gasped opening her eyes. The sight, oddly like that of Storybrooke, very odd indeed. Why would the gods make the afterlife a copy of a quaint town?
Looking around more, Nimue realized she was a little lost. Stumbling as she walked though a road in a neighborhood, it finally hit her that she was wearing what she wore when she first met Merlin.
Oh gods, Merlin. She'd killed him through Killian's hands. More or less anyways, but she had killed her love. The whole reason she became that thing.
In that moment, a few dozen meters from where she woke up, she knew she needed to find him. Would he even be here? Wherever here was?
And would he want her? How could he love her after all she's done? Somehow, it nauseated her to think back on it all.
A flash of Merlins eyes came to her mind, when he died the last thing he'd ever looked at was her. Gods above did she hope he knew she still loved her.
Of course she rememberd Emma telling him so, but how could he believe that? No she had to find him. Tell him herself, make him remember.
Nimue began sprinting through town, eventually winding up running past Rumplestiltskins old own shop. Stopping in front of it she looked inside, recognized Peter Pan through the glass.
Squinting at him she couldn't see the resemblance between him and Rumple, though they did have a penchant for dark magic. That's resemblance enough.
But was it really? Would Rumple ever have cared for dark magic had she not been the one to force another in giving it to him? In all their years, centuries, working together, Nimue learned a lot about him. Rumple wasn't a man with inherent evil, or inherent magic, he was just a desperate man.
And now she's a desperate woman. Searching for her ex-fiance in whatever realm this is. He couldn't be too far right? Storybrookes wasn't impossibly large. She'd find him if he was here.
She had to.
Maybe he'd be at Granny's diner? It's the place he died in, selfishly Nimue hoped he'd be waiting there for her.
That spark of selfishness ignited the hatred she'd felt for centuries. This time at herself. She had no right to want anything from him. Or anyone really. Not after ruining both their lives, and millions more.
Nimue walked furiously to the diner, pausing at the fence in an attempt to steady herself before entering. She had to remain composed. If not for her own dignity, than for him.
Taking a slow breath, bracing herself for what was possibly behind that door, Nimue walked up to it, opened it, wandered further in. So little of what surrounded her rendered in her mind. The one thing she could possibly focus on is who she searched for.
Making her way to a booth all the way in the back, she finally saw him.
Head held down, slight tremors in the hands holding his head. All she could do for a painfully long moment was watch. Take him in as she did all those years ago. He wore the same outfit from then too.
Her heart broke, and built itself back up a million times in what was likely the span of three seconds.
Deciding she couldn't waste any more time, Nimue placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. Still too stunned to speak. Feeling Merlin tense under her touch broke something in her that hadn't even been grasped since she was the dark one. He stayed that way even as he withdrew his hands from the back of his head, and looked up to see her.
Seeing tears well up in him, she realized there were some in her eyes too. "It's me, Merlin. I promise," whilst she spoke— it was more of a whisper— Merlin suddenly stood. More suddenly did he bring her into his arms, "I'm myself again, I swear." Pleading with him to believe her, she didn't consider that he already did. Hugging him back, she noted he wasn't as tense anymore. He was just firm, steady, holding her together.
When Merlin pulled away from her, they weren't in the diner anymore. Daring to take her eyes off him, she glanced around in confusion.
"I'm without life, not without magic, my love." He smiled at her, that same stupid smile from the first wizard joke he'd made to her.
She couldn't understand how he could still look at her like that, why he'd give her any more of his time. As if sensing how she felt, he grabbed her hands. Making the engagement ring she wore more obvious to them both.
"I've missed you, but, Nimue how are you here?" Did he truly have so little faith in the savior? Even as a dark one, Emma had more good in her than most people did.
"Emma succeeded, she broke my curse… I am so sorry, Merlin. If- Gods if I could take it back I would. All of it. Even Vortigan." Her voice shook, determined to get her regret out. He needed to know the woman he once loved wasn't lost. And she'd spend an eternity wherever they were convincing him of that, because damn it she was different, after being cursed for nearly a thousand years, she had to be different. But she wasn't gone.
"I wish I could go back, tell myself living a short life with you is better than any alternative. Tell you to not take me with you on your journey to make excalibur. Beg the gods to not make it so for me to betray you. I would do it," hell-bent on not crying during this apology turned monologue, Nimue stepped away from Merlins hold. Wiping tears off her eyes with her fingers, "I swear to you, that I would." Instantly she wanted to be within arms reach of him again. Closer even. Despite however kindly he looked at her, Nimue wasn't going to let that permit herself to be near a man who has every right to hate her.
Once again feeding into her weakness, she pulled her gaze off him. She could not bare to see him, no matter however much she wanted to.
Abruptly, his hands cupped her face, mercifully letting her see him,"Nimue, please-.. I do not need to hear endless apologies. I just need you. For as long as you've been cursed, I've waited for it to end, tried to break that damned curse myself. To be with you once more, and now I am. That's all I need," he declared it so earnestly she had no choice but to be believe him, "you're all I need," Merlin whispered it in such adoration. Oh how she missed hearing him speak of her like that.
This time she reached out to him, freely wrapping her arms around him, letting herself cry into his shoulder. It took a second for her to process that he'd been crying too.
They remained that way for a while, embracing each other, sobbing. There weren't many words to say in a situation like this. She still didn't quite know how they managed to be in the same afterlife, or how they could have a good reunion after everything. But, she really could not have asked for a better death.
Perhaps one day they may even have a wedding of sorts here. She still had her ring, Pan had his sons shop, a version of it at least.
The longer she held into Merlin, the more she knew how right he'd been all along. A life that ends is far more meaningful than immortality. How else could she be with him again if not for death?