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Kei leans against the window, watching his breath fog the glass. Through the falling of the snow (and now, the obscured window), he can barely make out what’s happening outside his house. It’s dark, it’s Christmas Eve, and Tsukishima Kei has never felt so alone in his life. He can just see the lights across the street as other families gather together, sharing stories and laughter amongst each other. A pang of jealousy hits Kei not for the first time that day. Ever since they moved to London a couple of months ago, Kei has felt considerably more lonely and frustrated at the world. Why couldn’t they just stay in Miyagi, where all his friends were? Why couldn’t they just live in a country where Kei could speak the language and know where to go to get the best pork buns?
Kei hates London. He hates it. He has no friends, no sport to play, and the weather is miserable as hell, every single day. There are no open fields for him to play in, no volleyball club at the school he’s at, none of the peace and serenity that Miyagi offered him; London, Kei thinks, is horrible. On top of that, Christmas isn’t that big of a celebration in Japan – but here, in London, everywhere he went, Kei saw Christmas lights, decorations, signs, presents – everything , and it only further reminded him of just how lonely he was here.
“Kei? Are you - oh, here you are!” Kei’s mother smiles at the sight of her son in his special Christmas pyjamas that she had bought him just last week. He musters a smile for her and walks over to her, falling into her outstretched arms. She lets out a soft sigh when Kei buries his head on her shoulder. Although he is only eleven, Kei is almost as tall as his mother and his spirits lift a little at that thought, but are soon quickly forgotten when he thinks about Akiteru, who is already half a head taller than Tsukishima Hiroko.
“Are you alright?” his mother asks, gently stroking his hair. Kei sniffles, trying not to let her see how upset he really is. He nods. When his mum tugs him closer and says in her gentle voice, “I know it’s hard right now, but it’ll get better,” Kei lets a few tears roll down his face.
“Sorry,” he mumbles, pulling away from Hiroko. “I just … I’m fine,” Kei is about to tell her how he feels before changing his mind at the last second. He doesn’t want to make his mum feel guilty about making the move here; after all, it was because of her job that they were here in the first place. Kei knows that Hiroko probably would have preferred to have stayed in Miyagi too, but the job offer was too great of an opportunity to miss; besides, Akiteru said he desperately wanted to improve his English.
Akiteru. Kei tries not to think about his brother, running around England with all his new friends that he’s somehow made so quickly. Akiteru was now eighteen, and had just started university in Cambridge. That meant he stayed at the student accommodation there, so Kei only really saw his brother on the occasional weekend that he would visit; otherwise, Akiteru was too busy exploring Europe or studying. He had told Kei and Hiroko that he would be spending Christmas at a friend’s house in Russia, where he could “ … experience a real European Christmas!” so Christmas Eve left Hiroko and Kei alone at home.
“He’ll be home the day after tomorrow, Kei,” Hiroko tells him, as if reading his mind. She leans over and takes Kei’s hand in hers. “Come on; are you going to help me make this nabe extra yummy?”
The smell of the hotpot, with the added kimchi and fresh wagyu beef from the local butcher’s, reminds Kei painfully of home. His heart aches for Miyagi, but after the first warm bite of the nabe that evening, Kei feels a little bit better. The warmth spreads through his body, serving as a gentle reminder that he is in fact, not entirely alone. Hiroko smiles from across the table as she pours herself some nabe , when the doorbell rings.
“Who could that be?” Hiroko wonders out loud, looking genuinely confused. Perhaps it'll be some carol singers, Kei thinks with little interest, before resuming his nabe.
“Akiteru! ” Hiroko squeaks, and Kei dares to look up, heart hammering in his chest. Could it be …?
A tall, blonde figure stands at the entrance of the house, the top of his head lightly dusted in snow. He grins and waves at Kei, and Kei feels as though he finally understands what those Western Christmas movies are all about. He stands up and sprints towards his brother, giving him a tight hug around the waist, refusing to let go even when Akiteru jokes that he can’t breathe. Akiteru wraps his arms around Kei and carries him back to the kitchen, plonking him down in his seat.
“What are you doing here, Aki? Weren’t you supposed to be in Russia?” Hiroko asks, tears forming in her eyes as she goes to give her oldest son a hug.
Akiteru merely shrugs. “Turns out the Russians don’t celebrate Christmas ‘til, like, January, so Viktor said I can go over then. He’ll be coming here tomorrow with his boyfriend, though - is that okay?”
“Viktor? The Russian ice-skating friend you made at Cambridge? Of course! And who is his boyfriend?”
Akiteru glances at Kei before helping himself to some hotpot. “His name’s Katsuki Yuuri. He’s very friendly,” Akiteru continues to talk about Viktor, Yuuri, ice-skating, and Cambridge, and Kei listens to every word. He laughs when Akiteru tells them jokes, and stuffs himself silly with the incredible nabe food in front of him.
Although he hasn’t made any friends of his own yet, and even though he dreads going back to school in January, in that moment, Kei realises that perhaps Christmas in London isn’t so awful, after all. They had their very own little Christmas miracle, and Kei wouldn’t trade it for any of the presents in the world.