Chapter Text
The afternoon heat in the suburban neighborhood had always felt a bit too quiet, the air stagnant and heavy, until Andrea Kimi Antonelli decided to disrupt it.
Oliver Bearman had only been living with his uncle Esteban Ocon for two days when he first met Kimi. Esteban's house was a minimalist sanctuary of polished concrete and muted tones, but yet, the house still felt warm and inviting. When Ollie needed a change of scenery for his penultimate year of high school, Esteban welcomed him to his haven with open arms. It was meant to be a place to focus, to breathe, and to escape the constant noise of his parents arguing due to their failing marriage. However, the peaceful monotony completely shattered the moment a fifteen year old boy with wild, dark brown curls, dirt-smudged knees, and a hoodie that was clearly too big for him scrambled up the old rose trellis outside Ollie's bedroom window on the second floor, knocked casually on the glass, and asked through the screen if Ollie had a spare screwdriver to fix a loose sprocket on his father's vintage moped.
Ollie had stared at him with a look of absolute shock on his face, stunned into silence by the sheer absurdity of a stranger dangling off his wall, but without a second thought, he handed over the screwdriver, and in return, Kimi gave him a brilliant, wide grin that crinkled the corners of his dark eyes.
From that fateful June afternoon, Ollie's bedroom window became an open door. Kimi, a few months younger and possessing an endless amount of restless energy, never used the front door. Instead, he was a master of vertical routes and sudden entrances. He would swing his legs over the windowsill, drop onto Ollie's hardwood floor with a soft thud, and unceremoniously flop onto Ollie's bed, instantly launching into animated, breathless updates about his day.
Slowly but surely, the rhythm of Ollie's life shifted around Kimi's unannounced visits.
***
The falling in love wasn't like a sudden, blinding flash, it was a slow, steady accumulation of quiet moments over the course of twelve months.
It was in July, when the scorching summer heat practically turned Ollie's bedroom into an oven, Kimi would lie flat on his back on the floor, kick his legs up against the wall, and ramble about the mechanics of vintage car engines while Ollie sat at his desk, pretending to read. Ollie would look down, watching the way Kimi's curls spilled across the floorboards, the way his throat moved when he laughed, and feel a strange, tight knot form right under his ribs.
It was in October, when the first cold rains hit, signaling that autumn had come, Kimi climbed through the window completely soaked, shivering when he took off his wet jacket. Ollie, worrying that Kimi would catch a cold, threw a warm grey jumper at him without thinking. Kimi had pulled it on, leaning back against Ollie's bedroom wall with a content sigh, his dark eyes wide and soft in the ambient light. Ollie let out a small chuckle when he saw Kimi's smaller figure being entirely drowned by the jumper, the sleeves completely covering his hands. With a sudden surge of heat rising to his cheek, Ollie realized that he never wanted Kimi to give it back.
It was in January during the dead of winter, when Kimi snuck over at two in the morning because he couldn't sleep. They sat on the floor with their backs pressed against Ollie's radiator, sharing a single mug of hot chocolate. Kimi's head fell onto Ollie's shoulder, his breath warm through Ollie's T-shirt, falling fast asleep in minutes. Ollie had remained entirely motionless for two hours, afraid that any movement, that even a slight shift of his weight would wake the younger boy, his heart hammering a frantic, terrifying rhythm against his ribs.
And through all those long afternoons and quiet nights, Ollie came to know Gabriel Bortoleto long before he ever met him in person.
Gabriel was a constant in Kimi's conversations. He talked about him incessantly, with a bright, fierce affection which made Ollie secretly, and embarrassingly, envious at first. Ollie learned that Gabriel was Kimi's best friend at school, and that he lived three streets over in the house with the dark red brick driveway and the big, sprawling oak tree in the yard. He learned that Gabriel was one of the only people who could keep Kimi grounded when his mind ran too fast, that Gabriel liked pineapple on pizza (much to Kimi's dismay), and that Gabriel was the one who dragged Kimi out of trouble when Kimi's curiosity pushed him a little too far.
By March, the winter frost had begun to soften, leaving behind crisp, clear spring nights where the air tasted like damp earth and spring rain.
It was a Friday night, late enough that the suburban neighborhood had gone completely dark and quiet. Kimi had climbed through the window at midnight, his nose red from the wind, smelling of cold air and lavender hair shampoo. He hadn't brought with him his usual relentless energy, instead, he had quietly kicked off his worn out sneakers, peeled off his jacket and crawled straight onto Ollie's bed, pulling Ollie's quilted blanket up to his chin.
Ollie had shifted over on the mattress to make room, turning onto his side so he was facing Kimi in the soft, dark shadows of the room. Outside, through the glass of the open window, the clouds had finally parted, revealing an endless, ink black sky dusted with many bright, twinkling stars.
“Ollie,” Kimi whispered, his dark eyes wide, reflecting the faint starlight coming through the panel. “Do you ever think about a year or two from now, you know… when we're both done with high school?”
Ollie looked at him, his gaze tracing the locks of Kimi's messy dark curls against the white pillowcase. His heart gave that familiar, soft ache it always did when Kimi was this close. “Sometimes,” Ollie murmured, keeping his voice low so he wouldn't disturb his uncle, who was probably asleep by now. “What about it?”
Kimi shifted slightly, his shoulder pressing against Ollie's arm, sending a comforting warmth straight through Ollie's shirt.
“Gabi says he's going to apply to universities up north in the next school year,” Kimi murmured softly, pulling the edge of the blanket tighter around his chin. “He wants to do mechanical engineering. He keeps telling me I have to start thinking about what I want to do in the future too, or I'm going to be left behind.”
Ollie tilted his head slightly. With genuine curiosity in his voice, he inquired, “ and what do you want to do, Kimi?”
Kimi propped his head up on his hand, his gaze shifting back and forth between the constellations outside the window and Ollie's face. He pondered for a moment.
“I don't know about university,” Kimi admitted, his voice barely above a whisper, looking out at the twinkling sky. “I don't care much about big cities or fancy degrees. I just… I like tinkering, I like fixing things that people think are broken.”
Kimi paused, and looked directly at Ollie. His soft, dark eyes were sparkling with that wild, unreserved honesty that always made Ollie's breath hitch in his throat.
“I was thinking,” Kimi said, his lips curving into a small, hopeful smile. “When we're both a bit older, maybe we could rent a house together? Somewhere just outside the city, where it's less busy and more quiet. A place with a big garage so I can work on engines, and a second floor with a balcony.”
Ollie's heart did a sudden flip in his chest, blush creeping up to his face. “A house? Just us?”
“Just us,” Kimi smiled, his eyes sparkling in the dim light like the stars outside. “Well, Gabriel can visit on weekends if he promises that he won't mess up my tools. But it'd be ours, Ollie. We'd paint the walls whatever colour we wanted. You could have a proper study for your books, and I'd build a wooden bench outside on the porch.”
Kimi reached out under the warm blanket, his fingers searching blindly until his cool hand slid into Ollie's warm one. He didn't pull away, and neither did Ollie. Their fingers intertwined, resting softly on the mattress between them.
“We could sit out on the roof at night,” Kimi continued softly, his hand tenderly squeezing Ollie's. “Just like this. Looking up at the stars, but without having to worry about climbing back down the trellis before sunrise. With no need to hide anything”
Ollie squeezed Kimi's hand in return, the force of his unspoken feelings sitting so heavy, warm and suffocating in his throat he thought he might burst from it. He looked into Kimi's dark eyes once again, and saw an entire future mapped out in the stars - a beautiful world where they belonged to each other without fear, without secrets, and without time running out.
“I'd like that, Kimi,” Ollie whispered, his thumb stroking Kimi's hand. “More than anything in the world.”
The two teenagers laid there together in the quiet warmth of the room, their fingers locked tightly beneath the blanket, watching the stars twinkle in the dark spring sky until Kimi's breathing slowed down into the deep, peaceful rhythm of sleep.
***
The months following the chilly March night passed like a breeze, slipping through Ollie's fingers like fine sand.
Spring bled into summer with quiet, relentless speed. April brought sudden, warm downpours that washed the dust off the rose trellis outside Ollie's window, May brought long, grueling study sessions for final exams, and June arrived in a burst of dry, golden heat that baked the neighborhood into a quiet stupor.
Yet, through every passing week, that night in March lingered in Ollie's memories like an unmoving anchor.
He remembered, the warm pressure of Kimi's fingers interwoven with his under the blanket, the unhesitating uncertainty in Kimi's voice when he talked about the house near the city, the balcony, the roof where they could watch the stars… It was a memory that Ollie returned to every single night before he drifted off to sleep - a promise that made this terrifying, unspoken love in his chest feel safe, contained, and real. He told himself that they had all the time in the world, they were young. Although the uncertainty of the future could be scary, he knew that the future they had thought of together was just waiting beyond the horizon.
Then July rolled around once again.
It was a stiflingly hot Thursday evening, the air thick and heavy with the threat of an impending storm. The sun had set in a bruised, amber streak across the valley, leaving the bedroom blanketed in warm, heavy shadows.
Kimi had dropped through the open window with his usual soundless thud, practically glowing with energy that made the quiet room feel instantly charged. He didn't sit on the floor or lie down; he paced the length of Ollie's rug, his eyes wide, bright and sparkling with a wild enthusiasm like he just thought of the best idea ever. Ollie's heart did its familiar flutter.
“Gabi says we're going to get lost, but he just doesn't get it,” Kimi said, stopping at the foot of Ollie's bed, rambling on excitedly as he gestured wildly towards the north. “It's not just a marked trail, Ollie. We're going deep into the ridge line north of the valley this weekend! Gabi calls it hiking, but I consider it like real exploring!”
Ollie turned around in his desk chair, resting his forearms on the backrest, a fond, soft smile tugging at the corner of his lips while he watched Kimi bounce on the balls of his feet. “Exploring? Kimi, it's just the old county trails. What's even up there other than trees?”
“Everything!” Kimi sat down abruptly on the edge of the mattress, leaning forward, his face inches from Ollie's. His eyes were wide open, reflecting the amber lamplight. He was practically vibrating with excitement. “There are old railway tunnels up there from the fifties that aren't even on the park maps anymore! Hidden overhangs, old slate quarries… who knows what else we could find there! Gabi says the rock face is steep, but if you climb the bluff at the top, you can see the entire county stretching all the way out to the river. We're going to go early Sunday morning, before the sun comes up.”
“Just be careful, Kimi. Gabriel's got more sense than you. Don't go leaning over any crumbling edges just to get a better view.” Ollie replied with a lighthearted tone laced with subtle worry.
Kimi laughed - a rich, bright, carefree sound that echoed off the bedroom walls, and leaned back against Ollie's headboard, pulling the drawstrings of his borrowed hoodie (that he insisted on wearing even in the July heat) through his fingers. “I'm always careful, besides, I gotta come back. I haven't finished stealing all your oversized jumpers yet.”
Ollie had smiled, swallowing down the absolute mountain of words that sat heavy at the back of his throat, that he wanted to say to kimi right then and there.
I love you, I don't care about the jumpers. Take all of them. Just stay here, let me tell you who you are to me.
But the acute agonizing fear of ruining the world they had built with each other over the past year kept him silent. He just reached out, ruffled Kimi's messy dark curls until the younger boy playfully swatted his hand away with a giggle, and watched him climb back out into the night.