Work Text:
“I'm officially weirded out.” Dante holds his hands up, looking at his younger self. Damn, he dressed like a slut. “I ain’t gonna hurt you.”
“Hah, you couldn’t hurt me if you tried, old man.”
“Old man?” Dante echos, glancing at Vergil, also in a faceoff with his own doppelganger, Yamatos sheathed but kept at the ready, “Listen here you little shit, you're the one crashing my timeline.”
“Dante.”
The two of them respond simultaneously to older Vergil, “What?”
“He’s not talking to you.” Current Dante says, exasperated, “That’s my Vergil, you have your own.”
His younger image cringes, “You can’t be me. There’s no way I'm so uncool.”
“Dante, shut up.” Younger Vergil barks, keeping his gaze on his older self. Clearly understanding who the biggest threat is here.
“They are… not from our past.” Vergil steps closer to his other self in spite of the bristling.
“He’s the spitting image of you.” Dante says, confused, “Shorter, skinnier, just as ornery, adorable-”
“Yes, I know.” Vergil tilts his head, “They may carry a similar signature, but they are not our past selves. Their origins are likely from a parallel universe rather than our own.”
“Lemme guess, Mr. Portal here, portaled his way to our place. So what now.” Dante relaxes, amused.
Vergil nods at him brusquely after catching Dante’s raised brow. An answer to his unspoken question of ‘Should We?’.
He slices a portal, dragging young Dante through by the holster. “Woah!”
“They're just having a little chat.” Dante explains catching a hint of protectiveness on the younger version of his twin’s face, Why don't we have one too?
Per family rituals, they talk with their swords. It's really nothing. No offense to young Vergil, he has skills and strength but it's leagues behind his future self. Dante plays around with him, running him in circles until he's leaning on Yamato, panting, visibly sweating, hair undone from his pretentious slicked back look.
“Fight me seriously!”
“Come back in twenty five years.” Dante yawns, “So hey, you still a virgin?” He’s the spitting image of when they first reunited.
A very slight blush forms high on his cheeks, brows furrowed in performative stoicism.
“So? No?” This means that Nero could be on his way. Dante feels for the little guy. “Come here.” He drags Vergil back into Devil May Cry, having taken the fight outside. It takes some doing to pin him down, but he manages. This Vergil doesn’t know any fancy throws. “If you sit nice, I’ll let you up.” he nods at the couch.
“I refuse to believe that a buffoon like you is my brother.” Vergil snarls.
“You’re just sore because you couldn’t get a hit on me.” Dante grins, “Doesn’t that make me more like your brother? Just like the good ol’ days.”
“Is your memory so defective? We were always even.”
Dante exhales softly, “Sure.” There’s an unreasonable amount of endorphins running through his blood right now. A high triggered by pure love for a Vergil that isn’t even his own. He lets him up, hopping over the back of the couch to plop on it, “Relax a bit, Vergil. I just want to talk to you.”
“I have nothing to say to you.”
“Sure sure. But before you get back to your nefarious plans, I got a question.” He moves his head to the side to dodge Yamato’s edge, grabbing the naked blade, restraining it, “You ever think about being a dad?”
This Vergil seems to stop breathing for a minute, “What?”
“You know, having a little rugrat of your own?”
“Are you senile?”
Dante reaches back without looking, grabbing his stupid (cute) vest, throwing him onto the couch, putting him in another pin, “You have a dick. You’ve used it. Don’t act like it’s fucking impossible.”
“Get off!”
It’s like they're seven again and bickering in their room. “Answer my question first.”
“It’s inane.”
Dante huffs, exasperated, “And here I thought you were the smarter of the two of us.”
“I do not have a child.”
“If you did though, what would you do?”
“These hypotheticals-”
As much as Dante would like to shake him, he refrains, “For fuck’s sake, VERGIL. Would you fucking abandon your kid?”
“... perhaps.”
“Lemme guess, the things you’d do it for more power.” bitter, Dante shakes his head.
“My path is that of vengeance.”
“I forgot you were such a repressed, emo bastard.” Dante looks him square in the eyes, “Then again, dad did up and leave without saying anything. Reasons be damned. He left mom. He left us. You always wanted to be just like dad.”
Vergil has the audacity to look wounded.
“I’m not gonna bother lecturing you. But lemme just say I fucking warned you, fuck around and find out, Vergil. I’m gonna be around whether you like it or not.” Dante feels the shift in energy before he hears the shing. “Oh hey, V, this is not what it looks like- why do you look guilty?” he asks accusingly.
The other Dante emerges from the portal, in a condition that can only be described as thoroughly thrashed.
“Dante?” The Vergil beneath him struggles.
“Bro, too much? You put the aggression in cute aggression.” Dante lets him up, getting off the couch.
Vergil’s tongue smacks the roof of his mouth when he opens it, but he refutes nothing.
“Dante.” Younger Vergil looks him over, from the black eye to the still-healing gash on his side.
“Yeah, yeah, yuk it up. You fucking suck. Future you fucking suuuuucks.” he bemoans.
“He blows too.” Dante snickers, “Anyways, you kids should head back now. Won’t do you any good to stay here, no spoilers.” he crosses his arms, looking at them fondly.
Young Vergil gazes back blankly, as if lost.
Dante nudges his Vergil, “Go easy on him.”
Vergil rolls his eyes, unsheathing Yamato.
It’s a little cathartic to see him bark at his younger self, “Focus. Find your anchor point. You should never lose yourself in multi-dimensional travel.” It takes less than half a minute for him to draw up a portal, looking a bit paler than it usually does. Did he really just make a door to a parallel universe?
“My hubby is so cool.” Dante pretends to swoon.
His alternate self looks at him, aghast.
Not one to coddle, Vergil closes the portal, sheathing Yamato, “Your anchor point can be anything, anyone. As long as it’s consistent.”
Young Vergil hesitates, “How did you gain so much power?” He looks up at Vergil, a hint of desperation in his eyes. Dante just wants to scoop him up and hug him. And bite his cheeks.
“You already have what you seek.”
“The pendants?”
“No, you fool.” Vergil turns, catching all of them off guard when he grips the back of Dante’s head, pulling him in-
“Ugh! Gross!” young Dante jumps back, hiding behind his brother, “Vergil, let’s get outta here. These freaks are fucking insane.”
Dante keeps an arm slung around his Vergil, breaking away from the kiss to say, “Don’t knock it til you try it.” At that point he was still an innocent teen but after losing Vergil, he was stumbling outta apartments a fucking mess. Loosey goosey. Accepting any and all invitations to fill the void. The heartache he'll go through makes Dante sigh in empathy, “Look kid, you're not gonna find someone you love more than your brother.”
“I'm a hit with the ladies.” Young Dante blusters.
“Uh huh. Keep your options open.”
Young Dante seems to realize he's being seen through. He tugs on young Vergil’s coat sleeve, whispering, “Hey, hurry up.”
“Yeah, go on, get. We have plans.” Dante smooches his twin’s cheek, “Unless you want to watch.”
Paler than pale, young Vergil unsheathes Yamato, making a greenish gateway. He snags young Dante’s coat collar, yanking him back before he can jump through.
“What??”
“Not this one.” he mutters, closing it.
Vergil humphs, arrogant with it. But Dante doesn’t want little Vergil to feel too bad, “You got this.” he nods encouragingly. It seems to have an opposite effect, making him growl and slash haphazardly. The ensuing violet portal hums ominously, black tendrils escaping only for older Vergil to swing Yamato’s sheath, dispelling it.
“Are you having performance issues?” Young Dante asks, ready to mock the hell out of his brother.
“Silence, Dante.” he respires heavily, taking another stab at it, but current Vergil catches the blade with two fingers.
“No. You are unstable. Find your peace.”
“What peace do I have?” he snarls, “My mother murdered and home burned-”
“You have your brother, blind as you are to him.”
“That imbecile-”
“Hey!”
“That charlatan is not my brother. He neglects his bloodline-”
“Okay, okay.” Dante goes for broke, gambling his limbs and organs, snaring young Vergil, squeezing him against his chest, “This isn’t a fight to be fought here.” He pats his back, up his neck and behind his head, scratching his scalp the way his Vergil likes it, “You’re doing your best, the only way you know how.” It’s a miracle he does actually calm down. “Try again.”
Despite looking a little rattled, the portal this time seems to be the appropriate color. Vergil confirms it, grunting his approval.
“You crazy kids have fun.” Dante blows them kisses until Vergil takes them himself, holding Dante’s palms to his cheeks.
“Someone’s needy.” he chuckles.
“You prefer my younger self.” Vergil grumbles.
“That’s my line.” Dante leans on him, arms over his twin’s shoulders, “Want me to get the old gun harness?”
“...no.”
“Liar. I’ll wear it for you, babe.” he grins into the kiss.