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The group stumbles out of the bar, Jophiel holding onto Schpood who manages to stumble over air, while Micro has to scream at Snowbird before he ends up falling into a drain with the cover missing.
"Okay, guys, I got a cab back to the dorm. Jophiel, you and Schpood should definitely take it. Snowbird and Micro as well." Flux, drink in one hand and phone in the other, turned around to see Schpood leaning on Jophiel, and Snowbird with half his leg in the drain. "Holy deadweights." He turns to Saps, who's still a little sober. "Half expected you to be as drunk as those two."
Saps gives a half-hearted laugh, and rests lazily against a lamppost. "Ehh…tipsy, maybe. Definitely not like those two though." He leans, weight shifting as his body begins gradually sliding off the pole and Flux has to grab his shoulder before he drops onto the road. "I'm fine dude, relax." He gives a weak smack to Flux's hand.
"Compared to them, yeah, compared to me, no. I bet you're seeing like, two Fluixons right now."
"Wow, two Fluixons would be nice. Wait, what?" Saps slaps himself and looks at Flux with wide eyes.
Dumbass doesn't even know what he's saying at this point. Flux can't tell if the heat in his cheeks is from the alcohol or the way Saps is staring at him with half-lidded eyes and a silly smirk on his face. Like the same stupid smile he draws on every assignment because, according to Saps, he can win some "aegyo" points. Whatever that means.
"Yeah, you're drunk buddy." Flux watches as he raises a hand toward the cab he called, the driver slowly turning into the road and stops beside him. He calls for Jophiel and Micro to drag the two drunkards into the car.
"Wait, what about you two?" Micro asks as he pushes Snowbird's left leg into the car before shoving himself in.
Flux leans in, tossing them a few plastic bags and a few paper napkins he nipped from the bar counter. "We're just a little tipsy, so we'll probably just walk or hail another cab." He ignores the way Saps wraps his arm around his shoulder.
"Uh, okay then, please get back safe. We'll text when we reach." Micro closes the door and waves goodbye as the cab drives off.
The cold air sends a chill down his spine as he feels Saps rest his head on his shoulder. "Sooooo….cab or walk back?" His finger traces gently against his jaw, and Flux wonders if he should turn to look at him or ignore the tingling sensation in his chest. "Fluuuuuux."
"Maybe I should've shoved you into the boot of that cab so I can finally have some alone time." Flux tosses his finished drink into the nearby trashcan and walks, with Saps slowly trailing next to him. He can't help but steal a glance at him. "You act drunk and not drunk at the same time. How much did you actually drink?"
Saps lets out a small chuckle, "Just a few cups," he stretches his hands and cracks his knuckles, "Do you want me to be drunk or sober?" He turns to stare back at Flux, eyes meeting, and Flux doesn't miss the way Saps' eyes drift a little lower before he shifts his attention back onto the road.
"Sober, please." Flux clears his throat with a cough so obviously fake even Cynikka's fake colds would look real in comparison. "I do not want to know what a drunk Saps is gonna be like." Their shoulders brush against each other as they squeeze to avoid some random lady walking in the other direction, and Flux wonders if Saps would catch the way he flinches as they touch.
"Alright, Sober Saparata." Flux doesn't need to look to know that Saps probably has that stupid grin on his face. "Are you not drunk either? I swore I saw you drinking a little back at the bar." He leans to take a closer look, and Flux subconsciously brings a hand to pull his scarf up a little higher. "Oooh, so you are drunk."
"Tipsy, not drunk. I'm still very capable of making sound decisions." Why's his face so fucking close holy shit—
"—Mmm…I beg to differ." Saps brings a finger to poke at his cheek, "But whatever makes you happy, I guess." Flux can barely tell if Saps is actually being sober or if he's currently dealing with a Saps that doesn't even know what he's actually doing. If he's sober, then fuck this guy. If he's drunk, Flux would make a mental note to never let him near alcohol ever again—because drunk Saps is clearly a different kind of challenge, and Flux doesn't want to be subject to this kind of torture ever again.
"I seriously can't tell—how are you acting sober and drunk at the same time, yet behaving worse than when you're actually sober?"
"Wow, that's so mean." Saps brings a hand to his chest and gasps dramatically. "You sure don't mince your words."
Flux doesn't really know how to respond, so he huffs, and directs his attention back to the path in front of him. The road is dark, mostly illuminated by the lampposts by the roadside and the neon signs of the bars and the late night cafes to their left. There are loose rocks, used cigarette buds lying around the pavement, and Saps occasionally pauses briefly to kick one, sending it flying far ahead. Every now and then, they hear the loud revving of an engine and feel the wind woosh past their ears as some biker zooms past on the right.
Flux chokes when he catches a whiff of that classic smell of burning rubber, and Saps makes a spontaneous joke on how the smell could probably become some kind of new vape flavour for bikers—Flux couldn't help but scoff at the idea of walking past some random guy telling their friends their favourite vape flavour is 'motorcycle engine smell' or something of the like.
They continue walking, until Saps stops in his tracks and looks at the convenience store in the distance, and then looks at Flux with a sheepish smile. "Uhhh—"
"—Want a snack?" Flux doesn't know why he asked, the guy is always looking for something to nibble on.
"Yeah, you can head back first if you don't wanna wait." Saps turns to the direction of the convenience store, and Flux simply follows close behind. Saps notices, and glances back briefly. "Coming with?"
"Well, I doubt it'll take long," A little jingle plays on the intercom as they walk in, "-and I am feeling a little peckish." Flux beelines for the snacks and looks through the small bags of chips on display.
Saps waves to the cashier on duty when they make eye contact, before making his way next to Flux browsing through the assortment of snacks and tidbits. "Feeling chips?" He takes a bag and looks at it for a second, before putting it back.
"No idea, I'm thinking of something hot." Flux pauses in his tracks and sighs when he hears Saps chuckle at his statement.
"Bro, I'm right here—"
"—You are a weirdo. And you wanna say you're sober?" Flux turns immediately to another section, looking at the ready-to-eat meals sitting on the shelves. "Anyway, what are you getting?" Saps doesn't reply, only giving a small hum that Flux can only assume that he's also still debating on what to get.
Flux spots one of the baked rice meals and grabs it off the shelf—he'd get this if it was in a smaller portion; he doubts he'll be able to stomach it all. And as cheap as it is, he's not spoiled to the point that he's willing to toss half of it into the bin after paying for the full price. He turns to Saps who seems to still be wracking his brain over his choice of snack and jabs a finger at his shoulder. "Wanna share this with me? I can't finish the whole thing, and I don't really wanna spend money just for half of it to go into the bin."
Saps looks at the packaged meal then back at Flux. He shrugs, "Alright, bet. Want a drink?" He points to the drinks section, "Actually no- we just had drinks." He pauses and scrunches his face up, "Actually, wait, we should get water because we had alcohol right? How does this work?"
Flux laughs—the way Saps looks as if he's in some kind of moral dilemma—like someone just asked him a 'if you had to betray one person to save a thousand' kind of question—when he's literally just thinking if he should be getting water is hilariously stupid, so he just brushes past him and grabs a bottle of water for each of them before heading for the counter. He makes his payment with Saps trailing behind; taking the bottles and putting it in his bag while Flux heats up the meal in the microwave.
When the timer beeps, Flux carefully pulls the meal out and tugs his scarf down. He hears Saps giggle from behind him as he wraps his hands with the fabric and picks up the food. "Okay bro, don't act like you don't do this as well." He simply laughs in response, and grabs a set of disposable utensils from the cashier before holding the door open for Flux. Saps rips the paper packaging open and scoops up a small portion of the rice with the spoon.
He immediately regrets his decision when he remembers it just left the microwave. He hops and huffs in response as he realises it's way too hot and his tongue feels like it's about to burn off, and Flux simply finds this way too amusing to not watch.
"Holy shit, bro- okay- this is hot- like- bro- holy- my tongue bro-" Saps waves his hand at his mouth and takes a deep breath as he swallows. "Oh my god- okay, no- let's wait for it to cool a little."
After a few minutes, Saps tests the temperature again, and hums when he doesn't burn his tongue off. He takes another scoop and raises it to Flux's lips, who looks at him in confusion. "What?"
"I only took one set of cutlery, and your hands are occupied." He gestures at the spoon again, then at Flux's hands wrapped in the scarf. "Come on." Flux blinks, opens his mouth hesitantly and looks away, pretending he doesn't notice the way Saps' lips slowly curve into a smile in the corner of his eye as the spoon leaves his mouth. "There we go."
"Every second of interacting with you makes me think you're either off your rocker or just so unbelievably drunk that you act sober." Flux says in between his chewing. "Just hurry up and finish this, my hands are tired."
Saps takes a bite, glances over to see if Flux is done with his previous portion, and then scoops another up before bringing it to Flux, who quietly opens his mouth and looks away almost immediately. They fall into this steady rhythm, back and forth, Flux pushes the plastic tray towards Saps on his turn, and Saps pulls Flux's lips closer on his.
The plastic feels lighter and cooler as time goes by, and when Flux turns around for the last time, he notices the tray is empty, and Saps is giving little kitten licks to the spoon. They spot a trashcan by the opposite side of the road, and carefully make their way and toss the trash in. Flux unwraps his hands, and curls the scarf around his neck carefully.
"Aww, I missed seeing your face." Another questionable comment from Saps, and Flux has to resist the urge to roll his eyes at the man as they cross the road back to their original path.
"Maybe you're pretending to be drunk so you can say all these weird things huh." Flux shoves his shoulder against Saps jokingly. He feels a buzz in his back pocket, and pulls his phone out to see Micro's name pop up in the notifications. "I think they got back safe."
Micro:We're back. snowbird's knocked out on his bed rn and jophiel and schpood are back in their room too. u guys otw back?
Flux:Yeah, we detoured for a snack, but we're walking back now.
Micro:alr alr, be safe!
Flux:Rest up.
Flux turns off his phone and slides it back into his pocket. "So uh, don't mean to be a party-pooper. But I think it's raining a little." He hears Saps and turns up to look at the sky, feeling water droplets drip and hitting his cheek. Saps brings a hand to brush through his own hair, disheveled from the wind, the other hand hiding in his pocket. "Oookay, I don't think it's drizzling anymore."
Saps is right, the rain is starting to get bigger. The small drizzle is easy to ignore—a few droplets of water is fine, they'll dry as they walk. But a storm? That's a different thing. Flux can feel the wind grow stronger, the gentle breeze picking up and pushing the leaves off the ground. The wind howls from behind, and Flux can sense it pressing against his legs, an imaginary weight on his knees as he steps forward. Saps is quickly to hold onto Flux's arm as he realises the seemingly short drizzle has begun to grow into something a bit too strong to their likings.
"Shit, you got an umbrella?" Saps covers his face with a free hand.
Flux shakes his head. "I was gonna ask you that question…!" He looks around. There aren't exactly any stores close by where they can borrow an umbrella from. And the shops he can spot are already closed for the day, lights off and shutters drawn. "Fuck, I think we gotta run for it or something." He speeds forward.
Saps follows behind, the rain has become stronger with each step, and Flux figures that if they don't get under some kind of shelter any time soon, they're gonna be walking with wet socks and raisin feet. "Flux, I see a bus stop ahead of us, should we just call a cab to pick us up there?"
Flux looks up from the ground and shields his eyes from the cold aerial assault of water; there's a faint flickering light up ahead, and he makes out the shape of a bus stop as he squints his eyes.
"Yeah, good call. Guess you're pretty sharp after all." They beeline towards the bus stop, feeling the water splatter against their shoes, splashing the tiny puddles that have begun to form in the uneven pavement.
They dash under and let out a sigh of relief, swinging their arms and flicking the water out their hair. Flux combs through his hair with a hand, bangs wet and sticking to the sides of his face. He turns around to check on Saps, only to make eye contact with Saps who's staring straight at him—his eyes dart away so fast it's hard for Flux to ignore. The light above flickers, as if in tune with the way their eyes meet and part.
"So—should we…call a cab?" Flux looks away and puts a hand on his pocket, but he doesn't pull the phone out yet.
Saps clears his throat and looks out into the road. "Um, yeah. I mean. If you want to take a cab back. I don't mind walking back either." He glances between the road and Flux. "Um, we can wait for the rain to end too. Or y'know. Just call a cab if you want to."
"Well, do you want to wait? I mean, I'm- fine with whatever. I can call it if you really want. Up to you." It'd be a lie for Flux to say he doesn't notice the strange awkwardness that's suddenly filled the air. Is it because he's starting to sober up? Or maybe Saps is being nice and he's just being weird about it.
"Uhhh." Saps pats his clothes and quietly sits down on the bench. "I mean, we can, dry off a little first. Then call the cab. Don't want the driver to get mad, y'know?"
Flux's hand lets go of the edge of his pocket and comes to rest at his side. He looks around, tries to find something he can stare at to avoid looking at Saps. He slowly walks towards the space next to Saps, and silently sits down on the bench. "Yeah, that's a good idea. Let's just wait then." Their knees bump against each other, and it's almost embarrassing how both of them seem to jolt at the contact. "Like, wait to dry off. Y'know."
"Yeah, yeah."
Flux plays with the fraying thread of his scarf, and notices the way Saps is fiddling with his fingers, tapping against each other as he stares at the ground. The storm is the only thing they hear, the howling wind making Flux shiver as a gust brushes past the back of his neck. The loud pitter-patter doesn't actually soothe the awkward silence between the two, and the rain hammering against the shelter above them doesn't help to dampen Flux's thumping heartbeat.
The leaves rustle with the breeze, and Flux wishes he was just another tree standing tall in this nasty rain so he didn't have to sit next to the Saparata Theria. He glances over as discreetly as possible, and traces the sharp jawline slowly with his eyes, messy hair dripping slightly, wetting the white blouse he has on.
He notices Saps' eyes slowly drawing closer, head turning slightly to make eye contact and Flux wonders if he should keep looking or turn away and pretend he wasn't blatantly staring at him.
Maybe he doesn't notice, or Saps is purposely trying to piss him off somehow, but he stares back, golden eyes looking at his face with an inexplicable expression. His gaze is intense, as if trying to memorise it.
"You're staring." Flux blinks, but doesn't dare to turn away.
"You're staring too." Saps gives a tiny smile, gaze slowly resting on Flux's lips vaguely covered by his scarf, pausing for a moment before darting back up to stare back into his eyes. "Why's that?"
"I…don't know." Flux feigns pretense, acts like he doesn't notice the way they're starting to get closer. "Why are you staring?"
He doesn't respond. But after a brief moment of silence, Saps tilts his head and leans in a little. "Are you still a little tipsy? Maybe I am too."
Flux subconsciously brings himself in closer, their shoulders touch and yet this time, they don't flinch, they don't jump. He leans into Saps' warmth, "Maybe, are you?" He can feel Saps shift his weight, stretching an arm out and resting it behind him.
"Do you want me to be drunk or sober?"
Flux wraps his arms around his shoulder, and there's a strange euphoria rising in his chest as he locks his arms in place around his neck. Lightning flashes across the sky, thunder rumbling in the distance, Flux regains a moment of clarity and breathes out shakily. "We're not- you're drunk. I'm drunk. It's the alcohol." He sighs and shuts his eyes.
Despite so, Flux knows very well that tomorrow, his heart will continue to race at the sight of him, even while sober. But tonight, he'll blame it on the alcohol, and if Saps were to ask anything about whatever this was in the morning, he'll just give a lame excuse like mistaking Saps for some ex girlfriend—even though Saps probably knows he's never had one.
But then he feels a hand land gently on his cheek, fingers tracing his jaw, and thumb brushing against his lips. "You're not yourself, Saps." Flux begins to pull away, arms tearing away. "I'm not myself. We are not ourselves—"
"—I'm very sober, Flux." A lie, Flux will take it as a lie, and pretend it's just drunk Saps rambling off on his own. "But I'll ask again. Do you want me to be drunk or sober?" Saps wraps his other arm around Flux, pulling him back. "Flux. Answer me, Fluixon."
"Would either answer change this situation we're in?" Flux freezes in place when he hears his name roll off Saps' tongue so smoothly.
"No," He shifts his hand to rest on Flux's nape, leaning in and turning his head to press his lips on his cheek. "Of course not."
Flux flinches as he feels Saps continue to plant soft kisses against his jaw, "S-Saps, Saparata-wait-" He feels a hand squeeze against his waist, and Flux doesn't know if he should push him away or let him have his way. "Saps, you-"
"-Flux, Fluixon, my dear Fluixon." Saps turns to plant more kisses on the other cheek, and Flux lets out an accidental whine in response. "Saps, we're not-we can't. You can't." His arms loosen and grab onto his shoulders.
Flux opens his eyes and looks at Saps, half-lidded eyes and pink cheeks, white hair luminous under the flickering light, each breath is slow and seemingly painful, he doesn't meet Flux's gaze, eyes locked onto his lips, tongue peeking out slightly to lick his own.
"Do you want this, Flux?" Saps leans in even closer, foreheads bumping into each other. "Tell me, Flux. If you want this, then let me."
It'd be a lie to admit he didn't crave it, and it'd be impossible to act like he hasn't wished for this kind of moment before. Bodies clinging closer and closer, exchanging breaths and feeling their warmths intertwine; Flux feels like he's about to get a heart attack simply being this close. He can sense Saps waiting, hand on his nape and waist trembling like he's holding back.
"Saps, Saps- listen, we can't. No-this isn't funny." Flux holds onto his shoulders, hands shaking.
Saparata Theria, one of the top students of State College, platinum hair that glows under the sun, pale skin that makes him stand out from everyone else, golden accessories that jingle and announce his presence to the world. He's the distinct laughter in a crowd, the conversation you can't help but hear through your headphones, like the one random engine revving in the middle of the night and shatters the peaceful silence. Saps is loud, comes in like a hurricane and sweeps everyone off their feet and tosses everything out of place.
Fluixon Aculon, the president for student council. Raven hair that resembles the void of a black cat's fur, he is matheletics medals laid upon medals, competition trophies stacks upon trophies. Despite this, he blends into the background, and nobody knows him past his list of golden stars and perfect grades. He is the humming white noise in libraries, the extra food portion at a party left untouched and the rain thumping against a closed window pane. It's there, but you just don't notice it. And the only distinct trait about him is that he's really good friends with a very distinct individual—Saps.
It's almost comical to see the two walking next to each other. They get assigned the same dorms, and their lecture theatres are somehow always side by side. It's almost like they're welded together.
"You're just playing around, right? You're drunk and you're just joking and playing a prank on me. Stop that, Saps."
"I'm not fooling around." He moves forth and crashes his lips onto Flux's, the hand on his waist tracing up to hold his face tenderly, he pulls back but leans back in before Flux can even catch his breath. "I know what I'm doing, Flux."
Yet Saps pays a little less attention to everyone else when Flux is walking next to him, he gives a friendly wave but never lingers for too long, doesn't stop in his tracks to dab up some other friend or slow his steps to shake a hand with someone else. And Flux rambles a little more, a little louder when Saps is there, he cracks a smile when he manages to put Saps in a spot. He's a lot more snarky, a lot more sarcastic when Saps says something stupid.
"Saps- you-" Flux can feel Saps' soft lips parting and closing, tongue prodding inwards and brushing against his own, catching the faint taste of baked rice from their earlier snack run, and the scent of alcohol—sweet and intoxicating. His ragged breath hitches as Saps continues to push, and barely pulls away before diving in again. His head spins as he fails to catch his breath again, letting Saps pin his lips against his own over and over again.
"I-" Saps leans back, a thin thread of spit connecting their lips. "Whether I'm drunk or sober, it wouldn't change a thing."
"Why?"
"Why not? It's you. So why not?"
"It's not right, it just isn't." Flux winces at the thought. "What will they think of you, of me, of us?" There shouldn't be anything wrong with this, he's craved this moment for months, has been wishing upon a star to be able to hold Saps like this, fingers threading through his soft locks, feeling the way his arm curve around his shoulders, the way his own figure seems to fit snugly in Saps' hands. Everything so perfectly molded to his expectations, and yet, he can't rid himself of this strange feeling pooling in his gut—it's so comfortable in Saps' warmth that he can't help but feel fear bubbling in his chest.
"Do you want this, Flux?"
"What?"
"Do you want me, Fluixon?" Saps leans in again, sealing their lips together once more, he groans and pants into the kiss like he's about to devour him alive, each breath more hurried and ravenous than the last. Yet his hands still rest gently against Flux's figure like he's fragile, so easy to crumble and crush. "Tell me, Flux. One way or another."
It's dizzying, this moment, the sensation of their breaths mixing into each other feels divine, Flux tells himself that he should push him away, but his fingers tug desperately at Saps' hair, pulling him in tighter. His own body is pushing against Saps, and the feeling of Saps' warm lips on his sends an electrifying wave of euphoria throughout his body. He groans, words falling into a muffled whimper as he can't help but melt inwards, and savor every lingering flavor on his lips, the rough texture of their tongues brushing against each other.
Fuck, he can regret this in the morning. He gives in, lets the giddy feeling boil in his head, feeling the loud thumping of his heart in his chest. He parts his lips again, poking his own tongue in and memorising the way it swirls around Saps' mouth.
"Fuck- Saps- This is-" This might be the worst mistake or the best decision of his life. Flux thinks to himself. Because what are the chances Saps will wake up tomorrow, and regret everything, the probability of Saps suddenly coming to his senses and slapping the shit out of him is low but never zero.
Because even if he was gay, Flux wouldn't be the one he—
"You can blame it on the alcohol, blame it on whatever you like." Saps sneaks in his words between their fervency. "Blame it on me if you'd like." He drinks up every sound, every trembling whimper that escapes Flux. "I want this, I wantyou."
"Maybe you'll regret it later, maybe you'll regret it tomorrow." Flux chokes back a sob. "Then it won't be the same again—"
"I love you, Flux." It catches Flux off guard, an unexpected confession in the middle of nowhere, and Flux shivers as Saps holds him tighter, closer, diving in to plant kisses along his jawline, gently pressing his lips against his neck, and collarbone. "Flux, I love you, so much. I love you so fucking much it hurts." Each kiss is accompanied with another confession that leaves Flux's eyes welling with tears, shaky breaths filling the air.
"I actually love you so much-"
"N-no you don't." Flux instinctively turns his neck as Saps buries his face and nips at it.
"Yes I do."
"You're lying. You're joking. You're playing with me." He shudders as Saps rubs circles on his waist with a thumb.
"I would never lie to you, Flux."
"We're both guys." Flux cries. "Does this not feel weird? Why does this feel weird? It shouldn't feel weird. Saps- I-"
"-We both know you're not that kind of person." Saps does a kitten lick at his earlobe, and Flux shivers in response. "We both know-" Saps kisses at his sore eyes, licks at the tears that have begun to trickle. "-neither of us really care about that sort of stuff."
Saps brushes his hand through Flux's hair. "I love you, Flux, maybe it wasn't obvious then, so I'll make it obvious now. I love you, Fluixon. Maybe I am drunk, maybe my head is all woozy, but my heart will never be." A peck on the tip of his nose. "I love you." A kiss on the cheek. "I love you so much." Saps stares into Flux's eyes.
Maybe it'd be easier to push him away, shove him aside and act disgusted, pretend that whatever just happened was the most gross thing he had to go through ever.
He could just admit it. Just confess, he's already come this far, and yet even at this moment, seeing Saps face so close up, his throat seizes up and he can't get a single word out. Like something will change and it won't be the same again, but it was never going to be the same the moment they sat at this bus stop. It was never going to be the same the moment he chose to not call that cab.
He can pretend everything's fine, pretend that everything that just went down was a dream, some kind of drunk stupor, that the two of them just begun fooling around because they were under the influence.
Saps was right in front of him, waiting patiently.
Every single muscle in his body seemed to sour, like a warning sign that he had to run. And yet Saps' warmth entangled in his own was like a cradle, a soft guiding hand inviting him in. His body burned with fear, and yet all he wanted to do was just—
Flux grabbed onto Saps and pulled him forward. This time, it was his turn to devour Saps alive. In between every kiss was a soft whisper that sent Saps trembling with every breath.
"Yeah- I- I love you too, Saps. Since we met- since we became good friends-Since that day-Even when we fought-" He leaned forward, and they fell backwards, Flux pushing his weight down on Saps who reciprocated, swallowing every quiet confession Flux mumbled into their passionate exchange.
Flux gently lifted himself up, catching his breath and staring sheepishly at the man beneath him.
"No words?" Saps poked at his cheek.
He swatted the hand away. "Fuck you." He can't help but stop getting annoyed when he hears that familiar chuckle.
It's fine. Flux can regret it when the rain stops, Saps can regret it when they get back, they can regret it when they have to break the news to everyone else, but neither will regret it now.