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The minor pain pulsing through his skull was the first thing Tobio became aware of when he woke up on the fourth day of their training camp in Tokyo. It had nagged him when he had been trying to get to sleep the night before, so he’d had to down a few painkillers in order to sleep at all. He wasn’t typically prone to headaches, but this one had been continuously bothering him since they’d got to Tokyo. The training camp was only a week long, so Tobio had pushed it to the side. Especially since he was determined to nail the new toss they’d been working on. Afterall, if he didn’t master that toss, he’d never best Oikawa and Karasuno would never go to Nationals.
With that motivation in mind, Tobio slowly drags himself up into a sitting position on his futon. Like most mornings, he’s one of the first ones awake in the room, which is his cue to get up for his usual morning run. He sighs and slowly sits up -
Whoa, maybe not.
The minute he goes to sit up, he can feel the beginnings of nausea curl in his stomach, on top of the building headache. He immediately flops back down on his futon, at a speed which makes him a little dizzy.
What just happened? Tobio stays laying on his futon for a moment, willing his stomach to settle which it ultimately does. He decides to sit up more slowly this time, and when he isn’t immediately overcome with nausea, he deems it a more successful attempt. He slowly gets up, and brushing the whole odd experience aside, he decides to get changed and go for his morning run anyway. Whatever that was, it was probably a one-off. A run would probably improve things.
“How is my wonderful underclassman today?”
Tobio startles as a hand is placed on his shoulder, only to look over and be met with Sugawara. The third year is smiling at him, but there’s a slight frown to his features. Oh no. Has Tobio missed something again?
“Fine.” Tobio ventures in response. It certainly wasn’t true given what had happened this morning, and after his run he felt even more nauseous. He’d ultimately skipped breakfast. Since he and Hinata hadn’t been speaking much during the training camp, and a lot of the others had been hanging out with the other teams, he was fairly sure this had gone unnoticed. He usually ate alone anyway.
Sugawara hums in response to Tobio’s… half truth. It wasn’t a full lie, surely. He could still play volleyball after all. They were halfway into a set with Shinzen, and he hadn’t let his fatigue show through. Or at least he’d thought hadn't, but Sugawara was always more observant than he let on. Tobio admired that about his upperclassman.
“I didn’t see you at breakfast,” Sugawara says, tossing his water bottle from one hand to another thoughtfully, “so I was just checking that everything was alright. You've been working very hard on the new toss. Have you been sleeping okay?”
Tobio was caught off guard by this. He had become used to being on teams where he was mostly left to his own devices, or flat out ignored. It was strange having teammates that cared for his well-being in general. “I went for my run this morning like usual, so maybe I missed you.”
There, not quite a lie. He feels that telling Sugawara he’d been too nauseous for breakfast would worry him, and he doesn’t want to needlessly worry anyone on the team for such a silly reason. People skip breakfast all the time, it was no big deal.
Sugawara looks at him thoughtfully, before nodding. “Well make sure you don’t overdo it with practice in this heat! And drink up!” He looks pointedly at the bottle in Tobio’s hands, so Tobio obediently takes a small sip. Sugawara smiles at him, and the whistle blows to signal the timeout is over. Tobio places his water bottle back down, and heads back down to his position on the court. The nausea dissipated a little after the timeout, so maybe he is overthinking things.
There's another timeout towards the end of the game, and this time Yachi very pointedly hands him a bottle of water with a smile. Tobio is surprised when she suddenly appears in front of him, and is a little startled by her intense eye contact.
“Are you feeling okay Kageyama?”
This was even stranger than Sugawara asking him! Tobio stumbles through some form of a response as he takes the water bottle and tries to drink a little more water, though this time it somehow doesn't feel as good. It sits heavily in his stomach, like it's been trapped there.
Thinking about it though, Tobio and Yachi had spent a lot of time working on the toss this week, so it makes sense that they were a little more attuned to each other than they had been previously. Still, it is sort of… nice of her to check up on him, even if he feels a bit weird about it.
Much to the frustration of Karasuno, they once again lose their game. Tobio is irritated. Mostly at himself. He could feel how much slower his sets got in the second half of the game as he got more tired. He was supposed to be getting better at this, not worse! How would he beat Oikawa like this! How c-
He startles as he feels a hand clap against his back, breaking him from his thoughts. “Shake it off! We have a penalty to do!”
Karasuno, once again for the umpteenth time that week, find themselves at the bottom of the hill behind Shinzen High. Today Tobio feels a little dizzy looking at it. Has it always been that big?
Captain Sawamura claps and they all burst into a sprint, ready to get it over with. As they're running, Tobio begins to feel oddly removed from himself. Maybe it's a subconscious thing to make running up the hill easier? That's a thing right? He lags behind a little more than usual, not too far ahead of Tsukishima. Tsukishima frowns when he sees Tobio this far back in the group, but miraculously keeps his smart comments to himself for a change.
Tobio mercifully manages to reach the top of the hill, and then once the last teammate makes it to the top, together they turn and begin to descend. The weird detached feeling remains, which Tobio classifies as rather strange. He follows the rest of the team down like he's in a dream. Simply acting on autopilot. He can see Hinata running ahead with Tanaka and Nishinoya, but the words they're shouting sound like they're coming from underwater. Thinking about water makes him suddenly aware that the inside of his mouth feels like a desert. He slowly licks his lips. Are they always that dry?
They're almost at the gym, so close to the entrance and Tobio is longing to be back in the cool gym with a breeze blowing from the fans when -
Oh, he stumbles. That's weird. He doesn't usually do that when he runs…
He stumbles again, and then someone grabs his shoulder. As he turns to face them, it feels like everything is happening in slow motion. The face is a bit blurry initially, but then slowly reveals itself to be Ennoshita’s, who seems concerned enough to turn back and call something that Tobio can't hear, because he's still underwater, and he's suddenly dipping under a wave and -
“-up, we don't …. -allpse…”
“Hill… drills instead…”
“-sure has he eaten enough….”
The chattering sounds of concern surround him as Tobio makes his way back to consciousness. His head feels weirdly cooler than it did before, and he tries to open his eyes to see why. Frowning as he slowly opens his eyes with difficulty, his gaze is met with the ceiling of a gymnasium. He knows it's not the Karasuno one, and it takes himself a few minutes to understand why that is.
“Kageyama?” He slowly turns his head to see Mr. Takeda standing with Coach Ukai close by. Tobio realises he's lying on the floor near the entrance of the Shinzen gym, beside one of the cooling fans. He slowly reaches a hand to his forehead, and finds a cooling pack stuck to it. The kind his grandpa would have used for fevers.
Captain Sawamura pops into his field of vision. “How are you feeling?”
“Confused.” Tobio answers honestly. He can't remember how he got here and that seems a little strange to him.
“That makes sense,” Coach Ukai agrees. “You passed out from heat exhaustion.”
Well, that's embarrassing. “Oh.”
Sawamura hands him one bottle of Pocari Sweat and one bottle of water. “Drink both of these.”
Tobio moves to sit up properly, before dizziness overtakes his vision again and causes him to flop back down. His captain puts a steadying hand on his shoulder.
“Easy.”
Light footsteps approach, and Yachi jogs over holding a few nutrition bars. “I got these from the vending machine!”
“Thank you Yachi.” Mr. Takeda says. She passes the bars to Tobio, who looks at them with uncertainty.
“You’ll have more of an appetite if you drink those first,” Coach Ukai advises. He crouches down beside Sawamura, and they both gently help ease Tobio into a sitting position. He glances around at the deserted gym. Tobio couldn’t remember how many games had been left in the day before he’d collapsed, but he doesn’t think he’s been passed out long enough for all the games to be finished. He notices that his teammates are absent at the moment, aside from his captain and Yachi.
“The rest of the team were a bit panicked, so we sent everyone to the cafeteria for a break and said we’d meet them there when you were feeling a bit better.” Sawamura explains. “But that’s not until you at least drink both those bottles and eat one of the bars.”
Tobio slowly sips the water. He really really doesn’t want to. It feels gross going down his throat and he feels he might throw it up. The water is easier to drink than the Pocari Sweat at least. He usually doesn’t mind the grapefruit taste, but it somehow seems far stronger today. It takes a long time to get through both bottles, before he eventually unwraps the nutrition bar. He feels absolutely mortified. He’s meant to be working on improving his toss, improving his teamwork. Yet here he is derailing the entire training camp because he'd fainted. In front of the entire team. In front of amazing Tokyo teams.
He feels someone nudge him, and looks up to see Captain Sawamura squinting down on him. “Hey, none of those negative thoughts. I can see them all over your face.”
Tobio isn't sure how he can respond to that. He has basically forced the team to stop for the day. How can he not be feeling guilty about it? He decides to voice this opinion aloud.
“That is absolutely not on you in the slightest,” Coach Ukai immediately replies, “Forcing you all to run that hill in these temperatures after you'd been playing multiple sets was an idiotic idea. We've already let the Shinzen coach have it for suggesting it in the first place. Especially since they knew it was likely the same team would be running it several times a day.”
That last part stings a little, but he’s not exactly wrong.
“We're going to be going back to diving drills for the last day tomorrow.” Mr. Takeda explains. “It’s been getting hotter all week, and we should have dealt with this earlier. This is not your fault.”
Captain Sawamura’s eyes squint again a little, “Unless you haven’t eaten anything else today aside from these energy bars. Suga said he didn’t see you at breakfast.”
Tobio’s attempt to avoid eye contact confirms the Captain’s suspicions, as almost in unison all three let out a deep sigh.
“Yeah, that’d do it,” Coach Ukai sighs, “any reason for the hunger strike?”
Tobio looks down at his feet, and cringes even more. He’s still wearing his outdoor shoes even though they’ve moved him into the gym. He wonders if he should take them off now? Does it even matter?
“Kageyama.” Mr. Takeda says in a stern voice.
“I just… the idea of food… I couldn’t…”
“And you didn’t think to let anyone know you were feeling unwell?” Tobio didn’t have any classes with Mr. Takeda. However, he’d heard rumours from other students that he could be very terrifying when scolding someone in class. He could see why at this moment.
“I….” He really couldn’t answer that. What could he say? He thought he could push through? It wasn’t that big a deal? His head still felt woozy and Tobio didn’t have the best way with words on a good day.
Mr. Takeda suddenly took a deep breath and sighed. He sent a pointed look at Coach Ukai, and the two of them crossed to the other side of the gym before beginning a deep discussion. Whatever they were talking about, they did not look pleased at all and it was making Tobio nervous.
“They think you’re putting too much pressure on yourself,” Yachi says. Tobio startles at the sound of her voice. He’d briefly forgotten she was here at all. She picks up the energy bar and begins to unwrap it for him. It’s the vanilla flavoured one. He usually enjoys them but he really has no appetite and his stomach curls at the smell of it. He simply watches as Yachi breaks the bar into smaller pieces. He wonders how she knew that he liked the vanilla flavour.
The concept of what she’s saying is confusing to him though. “Why would they think that?”
A sort of strangled noise comes out of the Captain’s mouth. “Because you do?”
Tobio frowns at Captain Sawamura. He takes one of the small pieces from Yachi and does his best to eat a little of it, though he still feels nauseous. She smiles encouragingly at him.
Sensing that Tobio doesn’t know how to respond to this, Sawamura continues, “One of the biggest lessons we’ve had to drill into you is that volleyball is a team sport” - when Sawamura sees Tobio looked cowed by this, he immediately verbally backtracks - “No, not in the way you’re thinking. Part of it was our fault. When the team was still in the process of figuring things out, before Noya and Asahi came back, there were a lot of holes in our defence and power. You were just…”
There’s a long pause as Sawamura figures out how to phrase his thoughts, which makes Tobio more nervous.
“...you were so, so good. We took advantage of your abilities to cover a lot of the issues with our play early on. We knew even if the receives were messy, you would be able to make up for it and still give us decent tosses. Hinata was able to play because you could keep up with his speed. Your jump serve is a useful weapon. There were so many things you were able to do that the rest of us just couldn't.”
Tobio is somehow even more flustered by the earnest compliments he's getting right now, especially when he doesn't deserve it. “That… may be true. But …. Working with other team members-”
“You've been working hard on that too.” Sawamura asserts, “you're a very different person than you were a year ago.”
“But I've spent most of this week working on that toss, and other people have been working together-”
“But you've been working on the toss with me, Kageyama!” Yachi interrupts. Tobio is surprised when she does. The Yachi of a few months ago, when she first joined the team, barely spoke when spoken to. “I don't know a lot about volleyball, and I was a little scared when I first joined. But working with you on your new toss, I've learned lots! It's been fun working together to make something new, and I know you'll get it soon.”
Tobio is caught absolutely speechless at this. Of course Yachi is a part of the team, in the way Shimizu and Ukai and Mr. Takeda are even if they don't stand on the court alongside them. He's never considered them as less, but he also hadn't considered what he had been doing this week with Yachi as, well, teamwork. He didn't think she was getting much out of it, and honestly that it was probably a hassle for her.
“I was getting worried yesterday though,” Yachi admits, “because you seemed a little more tired then you had other days."
Tobio thinks about Yachi coming over during that break earlier that day and handing him that water bottle. She had been keeping an eye on him because she had been worried about him.
This whole experience was very overwhelming.
The moment is broken by Ukai and Mr. Takeda returning from their mini conference, and this time when Tobio is helped to his feet he doesn't sway.
“I think it might help if you go lie down for a while,” Mr. Takeda says, “Dinner is still a few hours away. I'll take you to your room for now, and then we'll come get you for dinner. You need to have a proper meal this evening, but before then it might be a good idea to have a rest while nobody is in the dorms. If we deem you well enough, you can do individual training later, though I will be supervising.”
Sawamura and Yachi are dismissed to join (and update) the team, while the coach and Mr. Takeda deliver Tobio to the dorms. Tobio doesn't even remember falling asleep again, but he must the second his head hits the pillow.
The gentlest of nudges wakes Tobio from his nap, and he isn't sure how long he's been sleeping. It feels like a long time. His brain is fuzzy, and it takes some time for him to register who it is that's sitting beside his futon.
“My wonderful junior setter,” Sugawara greets, but with a strange undertone Tobio has noticed Sugawara gets sometimes when talking to him. Tobio thinks it might be a little sad, but that's a strange thought. Why would Sugawara be sad talking to him? “Are you feeling any better?”
Tobio moves to sit up, and albeit with help from Sugawara, he is able to sit up a lot more smoothly than he had in the gym. His head feels less light, and overall he feels more grounded. Sugawara passes him a bottle of water, and this time when he drinks it he doesn't feel much nausea at all.
“Yes, actually,” Tobio replies belatedly.
Sugawara beams at him, though the …sad(?) undertone is still there. “Glad to hear it! We're all having dinner shortly and it would be great if you could join us! Do you feel up to it?”
Tobio hesitates. Not because he isn’t hungry, but well…
He's embarrassed. He'd swooned like a maiden in a shoujo manga. Did he just drop to the ground? No, he'd have some injury if that had happened. That means someone caught him and carried him inside, which makes it all more humiliating -
He feels a hand gently cover his own, and Tobio looks back to Sugawara who looks at him encouragingly, “It's okay if you feel overwhelmed after what happened.”
Tobio shakes his head, “it's not quite that. I'm just….”
He trails off, and Sugawara catches what exactly it is. “Ah. You're embarrassed.” .
Tobio groans and buries his head into his knees. He really doesn't think he has it in him to face the others. Tsukishima has had hours at this point to come up with material for what happened. Nishinoya and Tanaka will either have found the whole thing hilarious or will be watching his every move, like they do when Hinata runs into trouble in bathrooms. And Hinata! Things are already weird enough between them without something like this. Tobio can hear him now, how can Hinata defeat him if he can't even stay conscious -
The hand grips his, tightly. A gentle sigh, “Daichi said you might do this.”
The captain? Of course, he'd wasted so much time and here he was wasting more time -
“Kageyama.”
Tobio looks at Sugawara again, this time in surprise. He sounds really serious. When Sugawara sees that he has Tobio’s attention, he nods in satisfaction.
“Okay, good. I want to get one thing through to you, so you have to listen well. Okay?”
Tobio nods seriously. He trusts Sugawara.
“You can't keep doing things like this.”
There's a long pause, as it becomes clear that Tobio doesn't understand. What does Sugawara mean? Things like what? Letting the team down? Wasting time?
“Overworking yourself,” Sugawara clarifies, “putting pressure on yourself.”
“I'm not - I don't,” Tobio trails off.
"You do," Sugawara asserts. "Like that time when we played Seijoh, remember? You got too in your own head -" Sugawara gently pokes Tobio's forehead to make his point "-and wouldn't communicate with the rest of the team. And then every play that you felt you messed up, well…."
Tobio doesn't respond. They both remembered how that match ended, how they'd lost -
Possessed by an uncanny ability to read his mind apparently, Sugawara sighs, "I fear that you're making my point for me by still beating yourself up about that match."
It's odd, being read so easily. Cheeks blushing, Tobio focuses on his lap again, picking at a stray thread on the hem of his shorts. He should really get that cut off.
The hand moves from covering his own to lightly gripping his shoulder, "Look. I know that things haven't been easy since you joined Karasuno. You've had to put a lot of work into learning to communicate better with the team. But, see, here's the thing about teamwork. A team doesn't mean only one person is responsible for everything. We are all responsible for what happens on that court- not just you. We share all the wins and the losses. It never comes down to just one person and one mistake. It's never that simple. So, don't work yourself into the ground when you have a whole team backing you up. Alright?"
Teamwork is something Tobio is still trying to get used to. Having a team who cares about his well-being is a foreign concept given how he has spent the last few years. The closest had been Iwaizumi in his first year of middle school, but other than that, people were pretty happy with just letting him do his own thing. Just letting him work and work and work until…
Well, until people didn't want to work with him anymore.
With a small sigh, like he can see the struggles inside Tobio's head, Sugawara takes Tobio's hand again, gently pulling him to his feet. "Come on. You need to get some food into you. There's still one day left at this training camp and we have to make it count, my dear junior setter."
Tobio nods. That point at least, they can agree on. Tobio gets to his feet with his teammate's help, and unlike earlier manages to more or less stay on his own two feet as they make their way to the cafeteria.
They're the first to arrive for dinner, which has never happened to Tobio in any training camp. He's usually lucky there's anything left, and only because Yachi or Mr. Takeda tend to remind him-
Okay, maybe he can kind of see where everybody is coming from when they keep telling him he's overworking himself.
Sugawara guides him to a table in the middle of the room, pulls out his chair for him and sits him down. Tobio sits nervously, wondering when the others will turn up. He's still stewing in his thoughts when Sugawara returns with two plates filled with a variety of foods. Tobio decides to start safe and digs into the plain white rice. It seems unwise to undo everyone's hard work by throwing up whatever he eats. Sugawara nods encouragingly as he takes uncertain bites, starting a light conversation about a summer assignment he and Sawamura were working on in their English communication class.
The bowl is about halfway eaten when he can hear the sound of heavy rushed footsteps, and Tobio tenses. Sugawara, eating his own food, gives him a reassuring smile as the doors to the cafeteria burst open.
"HE'S ALIVE!" is all the warning Tobio gets before he is buried underneath several sweaty teenage boys. He can hear Captain Sawamura and Sugawara chiding the more enthusiastic members of the team, and after a few minutes they disperse and allow Tobio to breathe in air not twinged with teenage BO.
"Honestly, do you want him to pass out again? Give him some space!" Sugawara is tutting.
There is hardly anytime to recover before Nishinoya is grabbing his bowl from his hands and inspecting it. "Has he eaten much? I heard you weren't eating the last few days! You idiot! You need to eat a lot when exercising, you should know that!" Tanaka pops up beside the libero, inspecting the bowl with a tsk.
Tobio doesn't know what to say, completely overwhelmed by this response. His team surrounds him, looking at him with a mixture of worry and relief. While Tanaka and Nishinoya have been the most forceful with concern for their teammate, Tobio can see the quiet concern in several others around them. Ennoshita yoinks Nishinoya and Tanaka back from Tobio's personal space with an apologetic glance in Tobio's direction, mumbling something about overcrowding. The other second years help in his endeavour.
Behind them are the shyer members of the team. Yachi, Yamaguchi, Azumane standing back and simply lending their support with their presence. Hinata too, stands behind them, oddly quiet for him. Tobio supposes things have been strange between them recently so he can't blame him for keeping his distance. Still, their silent support is overwhelming in its own way.
The other teams have slowly started to filter in behind Karasuno, and even they are shooting relieved looks his way when they see Tobio sitting amid his teammates. Tobio hasn't really spoken with any of them this week, so he doesn't understand their concern, but it's still nice.
Above the growing rowdiness, Captain Sawamura loudly claps his hands, "You can't critique what he's eaten when you haven't had your dinner yet either! Quick before all the good stuff is gone!"
Nothing motivates the team quite like the promise of food, so they all briskly head off to secure their own meals. Tobio exhales slightly once they leave. Having people care for your well-being is strange and confusing sometimes.
The table Sugawara had chosen was only meant to sit six people. Sugawara is seated to his right, and upon his return with his own meal, Captain Sawamura sits to Tobio's left. Tanaka and Nishinoya rush over to grab two of the chairs opposite, with Ennoshita taking what should be the last remaining chair.
Except, Kinoshita and Narita pull over another table, joining the two together. The rest of the team scramble to get a seat around it. Yamaguchi wrestles Tsukishima into the seat beside him, Shimizu encourages Yachi to take the open seat next to her. For the first time since perhaps their loss to Seijoh, the entire team sit together as one and enjoy their meal. Tobio still doesn't have the best appetite, but he finds that the company provides a distraction for him so he can slowly pick at the contents of his plate.
Tomorrow is the last day of the training camp, and for once, Tobio isn't panicking about having to nail that toss. His embarrassment at wiping out in front of the team has dissipated. Instead, Tobio thinks about how excited he is to make the most of the final day, and simply play volleyball with his teammates.