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Kairi sighed as she stared at the blank page before her. The soft sunset glow of the Destiny Islands was like a warm blanket over her tanned skin, the cool ocean breeze humming in her ears. She sat atop the usual spot on the tree in the kids play island, her legs absently swinging back and forth as she began to hum a familiar tune.
It had been over a year since Sora's disappearance from reality. He had sat right next to her on the very same tree Kairi sat, holding hands as they relished in a sweet moment before it all collapsed in front of her. Kairi reached her hand to the side, tracing along the palm tree as she tried to remember the warmth of his hands in that moment. It kept replaying in her head over and over like some twisted dream-turned-nightmare— what was meant to be a sweet reunion became yet another trick of fate, pulling them apart yet again. Kairi remembered seeing the sunlight through Sora before he faded completely, with not even a chance to say goodbye. How even despite everything, his reassuring smile shone brighter than the sun beaming through him. She remembered crumpling into Riku's arms as she sobbed and sobbed and sobbed, guttural cries of sorrow tearing from her lips. The gaping wound it left in her heart felt as if it happened only yesterday. But it had been several months, no— over a year. A year filled with quiet moments of nothing.
Of course, everyone else was affected by Sora's tragic disappearance. Riku, most especially. Next to herself, Riku seemed to be the one who suffered most from his vanishing. Kairi often pondered what it must be like for Riku, with his heart being so closely tied to Sora's thanks to his role as a Dream Eater. She figured that while not quite in the same way, he was in just as much pain as Kairi. It would only make sense, considering Sora was very dear to both of their hearts. Kairi and the silver-haired boy often spent long, sorrowful nights filled with sighs and tears at each other's houses. Despite both their efforts to keep a strong face for everyone, their masks would easily crumble in each other's tight, knowing embraces.
But Riku had left her within the first couple months to look in the other worlds. The sorrow becoming too much to bear, he drowned himself in work, overturning every inch of every world to look for anything that could lead them closer to finding Sora. Kairi soon followed by searching into her own heart, spending the last few months asleep as she looked for him from within. After she awakened months with next to nothing about Sora's whereabouts, she couldn't help but let the alluring bite of jealousy get to her when Riku conveniently had some dream that led right to him. And, like usual, Kairi had to stand idly by.
Technically, it was her choice. She told Riku that she should stay. She knew it was dangerous. After all, she had just woken up from a several-month slumber, and had just recovered from coming back from the dead a year earlier.
Still.
Kairi wished her friend would ultimately let her come along. She wished he would've looked at her with serious eyes before taking it back with a chuckle, that he was only teasing. She wished he grabbed her hand and walked into a new reality together, because hadn't they all promised to be by each other's side? But all the silver-haired boy did was give her a solemn smile before he was engulfed in light, leaving her teary-eyed as he too left for another reality.
Left behind again.
It wouldn't stop her, though. She was tired of always being left behind, like she never had a say in anything. Kairi wanted to do all she could on this side of reality, anything in her power. For someone who held the title of "Princess of Heart", it pained her with how objectively useless she seemed in power compared to others. It only fueled her determination more, though. She would find a way to bring her best friend back. Both of them, if needed.
Kairi absently traced the bottle inside her satchel. She remembered the letter in the bottle she sent out to Sora a few years back. It somehow made its way all the way to the Dark Margin, and helped bring Sora and Riku back to her in one piece. Perhaps she could work another miracle.
But what would I even say?
Kairi shook her head obnoxiously, trying to clear the cobwebs in her mind. When she used to think about Sora, words would flow out beautifully, like a powerful yet gentle water stream. Now, it felt heavy and agonizing, as if needles were slowly ripped right from her heart. She had come here to reminisce and think of something, anything to say at all, hoping the tides would ease her mind and have an epiphany come to her. Yet the tides hadn't facilitated any writing whatsoever.
Letting out another dreadful sigh, she flipped to earlier pages, hoping to find inspiration for admirable, uplifting words that would bring her beloved right back to her.
While she had called them "letters", they were rather diary entries rather than anything since she had never sent them out. The entries she had written back from the training she and Lea endured were kept in this sketchbook, as well. Throughout the agonizing months, numerous letters accumulated in her diary. She pored over every inch of every page, reading every line and every letter over and over again, imagining how Sora may have reacted if he read them, hoping it would give her a clue about him. Or was that just an excuse to tell herself? Was it regret she felt for not sending him anything, and that now he was gone, she would never know how he might have felt? A lamented huff escaped the girl's lips once more as she flipped through some of the pages.
'7.13
Dear Sora,
Where did you go? I still remember the warmth of your hand as I held it in mine. The smile you gave me before it happened. Thinking back, you were doing that masking smile again. Where things clearly aren't fine but you smile like it was. You knew what was going to happen long before you came for me, didn't you? Of course you would. When it comes to those special to you, you are willing to do anything to bring them back. Even if it costs you your life. But now, you're gone. Where are you? Are you alright? This is just some wild, cruel prank, right? Well, it isn't funny anymore. It's been days. You've made both me and Riku cry, you know. A lot. We're worried sick about you. You lazy bum, it's really not funny. You can come home now. Please. We're all patiently waiting. I miss you so so much.'
'8.16
Sora,
I feel like I can still hear your laugh in the quiet moments of the night. Almost as if you're going to suddenly appear and say, "Gotcha!" with a wink and a grin, your royal blue eyes glimmering with mischievousness as you spawn before me. Part of me still wants to believe you were always here, that you will make a grand reveal and that you're playing us all for fools. …But it hurts. We've all been looking everywhere for you. It's been over a month, Sora. I miss you so much. Please come back.
'11.??
Riku and I miss you so much. If we're the moon and stars, you're the sun that makes everything bright. We could really use that light right now. Everyone else doesn't want to admit it, but they think you're dead. Seems like it, at least. Riku and I don't believe you are. We refuse to believe it. Riku left to go look for you across the worlds, he thinks there's parts everyone missed. I pray you will be in one of them, accidentally whisked along some side quest you got carried away with. You've always cared so much about our friends in other worlds, after all. I love and miss you more than you even know.'
'??
I visited Roxas and his friends today. They miss you too. They had a photo they took with you in it. I miss your smile. I think of the time you saved me all those years ago, back when Radiant Garden was Hollow Bastion. You sacrificed yourself for me then, too. And you had that same, stupid grin on your face, haha. At least then, part of you was still left behind. Or is there still something left, that I just haven't found yet?
'--
Even and Ienzo have an experiment for me. They say it's like a dive to the heart— to scour through my memories in hopes that a clue leading to you will be there. I'll be asleep for a while. But if there's something—anything— that you left behind for us, I will find it. You've done so much for me, but now, for real this time, let me save you. Please. But if you do come back to us and I'm still asleep, do come wake me up, okay?'
A loose tear dropped onto the sketchbook as Kairi read her letters again. She turned her head to the top of the tree, where paopu fruits hung ripe in the sunset. She had promised to help Sora, only for fate to make it so that he was yet again helping her. Kairi looked back down at the blank paper in front of her, then picked up her pen. She figured it was better to at least just start writing and see what comes out, without much thought required. She wouldn't write with her head, she would write with her heart.
"To you, my dearly beloved," she started writing, inwardly cringing at her word choice, but continuing to write. Don't think about it.
"I know not whether you will receive this letter, as from within my heart I was told you are somewhere where our voices cannot reach you. But even still, I will never give up hope. After all, my voice made it to you down in the Dark Margin all those years ago, right? I wish this letter will do the same, wherever you are.
So much has happened since your disappearance. Riku and I have done everything and more in our power to bring you home. He has searched high and low in every world, even traversing over to the other side of reality, where he might find you. I even went to sleep for a few months to search within my heart for you. Who knows— maybe I've slept just as much than you if not more by now. Every time I close my eyes, I think of you. The gleam of your smile, the cadence of your laugh. Oh, how I long to see and hear those things once more. But even now, your bright smile has changed, hasn't it? It never quite reaches your eyes the way it used to. There's something more from deep within that you mask behind a smile. I wish that whatever is plaguing you that you will not tell me will go away peacefully. Someday, I hope shining light I know and love will shine the brightest once again.
Now, I'm training under Master Aqua. The events at the Keyblade Graveyard showed I still have much more to learn. I wish I could have gone with Riku, but it seems destiny has different plans. Funny how it always works, isn't it?
I still remember the promise we made the sunset before that battle. When we shared paopus and promises. I promised you that I would be there to protect you, and I intend to keep that vow. Sora, I will stop at nothing to bring you home, no matter how long it takes. Even if my light cannot reach you, we will find a way to be together again. You can count on me this time.
Thinking of you, wherever you are. May destiny line up our threads of fate and reach across the stars to bring us together once more. From until the day all the stars in the universe die out, my heart will always belong to you. I'm sorry I don't quite have the poetry or eloquence like I usually do, as this is coming raw straight from my heart. Though, it's exactly what you would do. Sora, wherever you might be, I pray this letter will find its way to you. Know that I love you, have loved you, and will always love you until the day every ounce of my ether is gone. I love you, more than you ever know. May your heart be your guiding key.
Yours,
Kairi ♡
(P.S)
I better not catch you sleeping when I find you, you silly, lazy, bum."
Water filling the brim of her eyes, Kairi wiped away rebellious tears that dared fall from her eyes. The girl carefully ripped the page out of her sketchbook and rolled it carefully into a cylindrical shape. She reached inside her satchel and grabbed the glass bottle, removed the cork, and stuffed the letter inside. Kairi brought the bottle to her forehead, then her lips as she whispered a silent prayer to the stars, finishing it off with a gentle kiss. She hopped off the tree and approached the cliff of the small island. Tightly sealing the bottle with the cork, she threw it with all her might into the vast ocean, summoning her Keyblade to cast a small Aero spell to launch the bottle farther along the tides. She silently stood there for a bit, watching the bottle slowly bob along the ocean until its silhouette could no longer be seen.
As the sun dipped mostly under the horizon, Kairi walked back to her Gummi ship. She felt bolstered by a renewed hope as the letter floated across the sea. Whether or not Sora actually got the letter, she felt better writing all of it out. As she sat at the helm and started the engine of her ship, the burgundy-haired girl decided that the letter would be a last resort. She promised when she started her training nearly two years ago that she wouldn't wait around anymore. Kairi wasn't going to wait around for the letter to reach Sora, either. It was like her own deadline— deplete every option to bring him back before kicking back and waiting for the letter to appear in Sora's hands. A determined smile formed on her face as she blasted off to the Land of Departure.