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With every step he takes Porchay shakes a little more. He swears the posters lining the halls glare at him from every angle. He passes their frames with his head down. He doesn’t know how his older brother, Porsche, convinced him to come, but it might be the greatest mistake Porchay’s ever made.
“Why are you so nervous?” Porsche questions as he looks over at his quaking brother.
“I’m not nervous,” Porchay squeaks out.
Porsche raises an eyebrow before a lazy smirk spreads across his face. “I see.” Porsche cocks his head to the side in amusement. “WiK’s studio is on the other side of the building and he doesn’t come out for anything. Our chances of running into him is slim.”
Porchay ignores the warmth flooding his cheeks. “I’m not worried about… him!”
“If you say so,” Porsche teases before he carries on down the winding hallways.
Porchay’s cheeks puff up in a huff as he follows.
His brother doesn’t need to know why Porchay is stressing out about being at one of the top music producers, Theerapanyakul Entertainment. Porchay moonlights as one of the most popular music critics in Thailand. He doesn’t write for a credible column but he’s read articles about how his opinion is important to the newest generation on the music scene. Porchay doesn’t know how much sway he truly has in the industry but he knows it is more than zero. Walking through Theerapanyakul Entertainment on an impromptu tour is a dream for the fan in him, but it feels like the ultimate betrayal of his analytical integrity.
“Where is P’Pete?” Porchay asks. “I thought you said he would meet up with us.”
“He will,” Porsche confirms. “He’s in a meeting with the big boss.”
“What about?” Porchay asks.
“He didn’t say,” Porsche responds with a shrug. “I hope it isn’t about a new sponsorship because he knows I’ve been eyeing that sports drink company-”
“Porsche!”
Porchay freezes at the voice echoing down the halls, one he’s only heard talking in interviews or singing in song before, but here it is calling out for his brother. Porchay slowly turns around and sees Kinn, the critically acclaimed Dragon of Song, walking towards Porsche with purposeful steps.
“Kinn!” Porsche waves back like the country’s top singer doesn’t know him by name.
Kinn beams upon Porsche saying his name but he pauses when he finally notices Porchay. His face flickers with confusion, “Mini Porsche?”
Porsche laughs. “Close! This is my baby brother Porchay. Porchay, this is Kinn.”
I know, Porchay thinks as a chill jolts down his spine. His last album sucks balls.
“It is nice to meet you P’Kinn,” Porchay says in greeting instead.
“Phi?” Kinn says in a slightly quizzical tone. “You are politer than my own nongs.”
“I raised him to be better than me,” Porsche brags as he affectionately pats Porchay on the head. “Lighten up, it is only Kinn. Although-” Porsche’s voice drops down to a loud whisper as he conspires with Porchay. “-Should we worry he wants something or is he only stopping to say hi?”
“I thought I would say hello,” Kinn responds.
Porsche grins, “See Porchay, I am irresistible around here.”
“You are,” Kinn says softly under his breath with a dreamy sigh.
Porchay jerks his head towards the singer with wide eyes.
Kinn, oblivious, clears his throat, “Back when we met, I said I need a love interest for my new music video.”
“I see,” Porsche muses. “You are here to put a fifth job on my resume.”
“My new album has an ending song which is heavily themed around phoenixes,” Kinn continues. “Since your fighter name is ‘The Phoenix’ I figure there is no better choice.”
“There isn’t,” Porsche preens. “I’m happy to help out.”
Porchay can’t help the grimace on his face.
Porchay knows his brother is better with people than this. Porsche wields his good looks like a weapon and radiates charm like magic when playing a crowd. The problem is his brother has one particularly bad blind spot: He doesn’t understand he affects men too. It is impressive considering how many members of the queer community are in Porsche’s life.
When Porchay saw the song titles of Kinn’s upcoming album, he thought the title of the last song “Phoenix” was a funny coincidence he could giggle about in the privacy of his room. Now, he realizes it is an intentional ploy to get Porsche’s attention. Maybe Porchay should show concern over how quickly Kinn moved on from his last relationship, considering his ex was an ex-fiance, but he knows Porsche’s allure is ridiculously strong.
If Porchay was a better brother, he might warn Porsche about the significantly more popular celebrity’s affection. Regrettably, Porchay is like all younger siblings when the topic of their older siblings’ dating lives are brought up. He wants to avoid it at all costs.
“This sounds like a business thing,” Porchay says. “I’ll give you some privacy.” Before either of them can say anything, he darts down the hall without a second thought.
His swift exit proves a mistake as the Theerapanyakul Entertainment compound is known as a sprawling labyrinth, without a single map anywhere (truly a critical design flaw).
Porchay doesn’t have a clue where he is.
“No, I can’t do that night,” a familiar voice says behind a nearby door. “I have training.”
P’Pete, Porchay thinks with relief as he approaches the door.
“How about Wednesday?”
Porchay pauses from where his hand is on the doorknob when the new voice speaks.
“I am free,” Pete answers.
“Good,” the other voice says.
Pete chuckles, “What do you have planned?”
“Does it matter?” The other voice mutters. “We’ll be high up with good food, and no will notice if we escape to the balcony for some privacy.”
P’Pete is dating someone? Porchay thinks with excitement before he furrows his brow. Why wouldn’t P’Pete mention anything about it to us?
“Vegas.”
“Hmm?”
“Your fly is down.”
Vegas?
Porchay freezes as a business magazine cover floats back into his mind. The cover in question featured a pale man in a sharp suit with even sharper eyes. He recalls Porsche’s comment earlier about Pete being in a meeting with the big boss. Porchay realizes with donning horror the big boss in question is Vegas Theerapanyakul, the one in charge of the entire Theerapanyakul Entertainment empire, who is planning on taking Pete on a date.
No! Porchay internally cries out in despair as he disappears through the halls again. P’Pete, you are supposed to the sensible one!
He should’ve never come to Theerapanyakul Entertainment. During his short time here Porchay discovers one of the top singers wants to bang his brother and the other positive role model in his life is banging his boss. Porchay is lost in his thoughts, and he can’t shake them as he rushes blindly through the building.
Naturally, he runs straight into someone.
Porchay doesn’t get a second to blink before the stranger pins him against the wall and buries their arm into his neck.
“Who are you?” A voice growls out. “How did you get in here?”
Porchay blinks as his vision clears. “WiK?”
“You are a fan,” WiK says without a trace of amusement. “You aren’t suppose to be this far inside the studios. Security-!”
“I’m not here to stalk anyone!” Porchay protests. “I am on a visit with my older brother, Porsche, and I can’t find my way around this stupid place.”
“Oh,” WiK comments as he drops Porchay to the floor.
Porchay slides down against the wall. He watches as WiK adjusts his iconic leather jacket and smooths down his dark hair. Then the idol extends a hand towards the sitting man with a fake smile stretching so far across his face it looks painful.
“It is nice to meet you Porchay,” WiK says with his best professional voice. “I am-”
“Don’t do that,” Porchay snaps as he lifts himself up and dusts off his clothes.
WiK falters. “Do what?”
“That, your persona,” Porchay responds. “It kind of lost all the magic the moment you pinned me against the wall.”
“Fuck,” WiK huffs out. “What do you need to keep quiet? My autograph?”
“No,” Porchay answers completely over this whole trip. “I want to find my way back to my brother, who is with you brother.” He perks up, “If you have a map-”
“Let’s go to my studio,” WiK interrupts. “I will call them to get you from there.”
That works too. Porchay beams, “Thank you!”
WiK squints, “Sure. Follow me.”
The chance to see WiK’s studio is unprecedented, so Porchay is a little disappointed when the idol ushers him into a clinically clean room. There isn’t anything indicating anything about the singer. The rare photos of Kinn’s studios include journals and small nick-knacks laying about, but WiK doesn’t even have a single damn photo frame anywhere. It makes Porchay wonder if this even is WiK’s studio. If it is... does WiK actually spend any time here?
“P’WiK-” Porchay starts.
“Kim.”
“Kim?” Porchay questions.
“It is my name,” Kim explains. “WiK is Kim upside down and backwards. It is weird having you call me WiK when the magic is broken.”
“P’Kim,” Porchay amends. “Your studio looks empty. Do you do anything here?”
“There is no point in setting anything up when I want to leave as soon as possible.”
“Is that why your recent singles sound so despondent?” Porchay asks.
Kim pauses. “What?”
Porchay’s face lights aflame as he realizes what came out of his mouth. “Not that despondent can’t work! I mean there is just a noticeable gap in your passion from your early music to your current music which makes it all the more sad seeing the state of your studio-”
Kim stares at Porchay as he rambles on. The idol types something on his phone before he places it face down on the nearest surface. “Funny, I recall MusicSage saying the same thing.”
Porchay freezes. “Oh. Did they?”
Kim peers at Porchay through narrow eyes. “Yes.”
Porchay turns around, “Now that I am thinking about it I can find my own way back-”
He doesn’t get anywhere as Kim grabs Porchay’s shirt and yanks him back into the room. “You aren’t going anywhere until I say you can go somewhere.”
Porchay winces when he hears the studio door lock.
"Alright, famous online music critic if you know so much about music why don't you tell me what is wrong with this?" Kim inquires.
He slams a pair of headphones on Porchay's head. Porchay stares at the singer in confusion until music starts flowing into his ears. He recognizes Kim’s voice in an instant—he sounds amazing but he always sounds amazing—but everything else is unfamiliar. It takes a moment, but he realizes whatever choppy mess he is listening to isn’t a released song. Porchay goes to rip the headphones off, but Kim holds them on tight until he sees Porchay is finally starting to paying attention.
The problem with all of WiK’s recent music, like he said before, is it lacks passion.
“I don’t know what you want me to tell you,” Porchay ends up saying as the music fades out. “You’ve always been more technical than P’Kinn, but you lack the emotion he has.” Porchay is silent for a moment. “Are you… burnt out? Do you not want to do this anymore?”
Kim jerks back as if Porchay scalded him. “What?”
“It is fine if you are burnt out,” Porchay gently says. “It happens to all artists.”
Kim blinks at him. “I am not burnt out.”
Porchay frowns. “Okay.”
“I’m not,” Kim insists.
Porchay tilts his head, “I’m just saying a break wouldn’t hurt-”
“Do you honestly think this is the best time for me to take a break?”
Porchay can’t help the way he rolls his eyes. “It is not your fault your cousin is running an entire entertainment conglomerate on the back of three artists. He should go back to business school if he seriously believes this is a sustainable business model.”
Kim blinks before a small sound escapes his mouth and he beats a hand on his chest. It takes Porchay a second to realize the idol is laughing in his own strange way. Kim’s laugh is a low chortling that sounds like he’s choking to death but it makes Porchay’s heart flutter.
“Vegas’ head isn’t exactly in the business at the moment,” Kim says.
“You know about his relationship with Pete too?” Porchay blurts out.
“Know about it?” Kim scoffs. “I witnessed the beginning of it.”
Porchay wrinkles his nose. “Gross. Did you witness Kinn and Porsche too?”
Kim sighs, “No. Kinn just won’t shut up about ‘finding his spark’.”
“Porsche believes he is being friendly,” Porchay says.
Kim raises an eyebrow, “Really?”
“Yes. He’s never been good with recognizing men are into him.”
“Porsche is straight?” Kim questions with a grin spreading across his face.
“As far as I am aware,” Porchay answers.
“That’s a shame. Kinn’s planned out the rest of their life together.”
“Creepy,” Porchay comments.
Kim lets out another choking fit of laughter. “Maybe Vegas has the better idea.”
“If he wants more lawsuits, than yeah,” Porchay says. “P’Pete can be petty.”
Eventually, they are laying on the floor of the studio with empty chip bags around them as they talk about anything and everything. This is how Porsche and Kinn find them later in the day. When Porchay gets home that night, he smiles when he finds a rumpled piece of paper in his pocket with hastily scrawled digits.
They get coffee the next day and continue their conversation.