Work Text:
Mirrored and Forgotten
Nightcord at 25:00
-9th August-
Yuki: Kanade, I think the second demo is better. The rhythm isn't as muddy.
K: Ok, thanks for taking the time to listen, especially since you're still working on tweaking our current song's lyrics.
K: Mizuki, Ena, tell me which one you prefer. I know it's a little early, so don't rush.
-11th August-
Enanan: Sorry for the late reply, and I think that the first demo's better. It has a nice melody.
K: Of course. Thanks for your feedback.
Mizuki stared at her screen. Five days since Kanade asked the question. And again, she hadn't had the time to reply. Sighing, she looked at her desk, cluttered with sheets and sheets of paper with diagrams of dresses and measurements. And the small screen illuminating the room was the only anchor to N25 she had now...
She could still remember that day when the rest of N25 graduated. Ena had managed to get into the art school she had hoped for. Mafuyu was becoming a nurse - not a doctor. Kanade was apparently taking up some part time music teacher jobs. Ena had sleepily attended day school for once, Kanade had somehow woken up, and she and Mafuyu had both been there.
"Congratulations." Mafuyu smiled warmly at them. "We got into the schools we wanted to."
"Oh my, yes." Mizuki grinned. "Very, very much so. Congrats, you three."
Kanade was smiling too. "Are you going to stay in N25, though?"
Silence engulfed the air, because they all knew how busy they would be.
Ena nodded vigorously. "Definitely. N25 is going to be lifelong for me." Mafuyu nodded in agreement.
Staying... in N25. That hadn't changed, but it was almost worse than disbanding. It had been getting harder and harder to find time to meet up. After all, they all had their individual jobs to look into. Kanade wanted to try teaching music as a part time job. Mafuyu wanted to help others and become a nurse. Ena wanted to become a professional artist. Mizuki wanted to help others too, and be a fashion designer.
For a year, Mizuki could feel the other three slowly drifting away. And now that all four were deep into their own dreams, their afterparties weren't a matter of debate. It just couldn't happen. There was no way they could possibly line up their schedules. And that didn't change after Mizuki graduated the year after.
And the process of songmaking was different now. They sang and recorded their parts separately. They didn't upload it together. Their nightly routine at 25:00 was... nonexistent. The chat was rarely updated. Mizuki only had her memories of their voices, and their singing, to remember how they sounded like. The other three and the VIRTUAL singers seemed to be fading away from Mizuki's mind...
...like dissolving treasure in the water, no matter how hard she gripped it...
...She might as well answer.
Nightcord at 25:00
Amia: Here's the storyboard. I might have time to finish the animations this week, so any suggestions?
Mizuki: And, I think it'll be nice if you could combine the two demos, you know, the parts where Ena and Mafuyu like. It might be a challenge, but it'll sound better, right? This is just a suggestion though.
And then she sighed, because she knew her messages would go unnoticed for the next few days before someone miraculously logged on. "...Back to this dress, I guess."
"Mizuki?"
"Hm?" Mizuki looked up to see Kagamine Rin on her phone.
Rin looked like she was going to say something, then decided against it. "I – I was just checking up on you. I'll go back if I'm distracting you though..."
Mizuki swallowed. She hated herself for what she was about to say. "Rin, I'm about to just dive right back into my work. So if you don't mind..."
"Oh, of course. Anyway, I already know you're fine." Rin replied, carefully monotoning her voice.
A few seconds passed. Mizuki bustled around with finding the sketch she wanted. She found it. She looked up to see that Rin was still there.
Rin blinked like a deer caught in headlights. "Um, I'm going. Um, Mizuki –?"
"Yeah?" Mizuki tilted her head in confusion.
Rin seemed hesitant, then quickly blurted out the words. "Are you going to come to SEKAI anytime? Len and Miku say they miss having you over..."
Mizuki knew enough about Rin to know that that was her way of saying she missed Mizuki. She hated to turn Rin down. But she had to get a start on her designs. "Sorry. I'm not sure..."
Rin looked down. "Yeah, you're busy. Got it." With a flash, the holographic figure was gone.
Mizuki was alone in her room again. And something nagged at the back of her brain, because looking at her designs, she knew that time wasn't the problem. She was just too much of a coward to see the VIRTUAL SINGERS again, because after 2 years of not setting foot in SEKAI, what did they think of her?
Unconsciously, she was building walls and locking doors again.
Four years. Four years since the other three graduated.
For the first year, N25 kept in touch. But on the second, it started to fray. By the third year, they no longer met in person.
And the irony was that even the viewers could tell. They noticed how the song, lyrics, art and animations weren't so in sync anymore. And though anyone could tell that their technical skill was increasing it was beginning to become obvious that it wasn't so harmonised.
Some people online mentioned that the music wasn't as good as before.
And the truth was that the version of N25 now... saved less people. And what was just as ironic is that Mizuki had no idea how Kanade felt about that. She could only guess. She'd thought of asking. But her fingers refused to click the send button.
Sometimes Mizuki thought... Would it have been possible to stay in touch?
Despite having gone 2 years or so without seeing the rest of N25, or even going to SEKAI, Mizuki could still easily visualise each of their features. Their hair. Their eyes. They way they smiled. They way they looked, when they were in pain. But it was almost like looking at a reflection in murky, rippling water. Distorted, that's how they turned out.
When Mizuki thought about them, this void in her heart grew and grew. She was heartbroken at the state N25 was in. The four of them saved each other. Shaped each other's lives. She thought they'd never drift apart. And now they were so distant.
Did the others feel that way, too? But Mizuki never got the hint that anyone else was. And in any case... she was too busy to care, right?
She was keeping herself blind to the truth, when one day, life threw a wrench at her.
It had started off innocently. She had been getting home. She had stepped out of a train onto the insanely crowded train platform. She had looked for an escalator, turning her head around.
Well, that's when she saw Ena.
Ena, wearing her usual attire, a few compartments away. Fighting to board the train Mizuki had just left. She was only a flicker in the crowd, but she could not have been more painfully obvious to Mizuki. It was a sight that froze her.
Even though, this sky is bleary with dense, murky clouds
Isn't it painfully bright and clear, in this lasting moment now?
And she was walking like she hadn't noticed Mizuki. She hadn't...
The next few seconds were instinctual. Mizuki's brain short-circuited and she stopped in her tracks. A man with a suitcase bumped into her. Then the next second, she was pushing the crowd. Ena was steps away from boarding that train. Mizuki was more than a couple steps away from Ena.
"Ena...!" Mizuki cried helplessly, like a cat in water, her pleas drowned out by waves and waves of passengers coming on and off the train.
Above her, the speaker was announcing the closing of doors. Mizuki charged forwards, desperately. She didn't know what she was thinking. Say "hi" to Ena? And then "bye" as they split up again? What was she charging for? Split seconds to see Ena?
She was an arm's length away when those thoughts ran through her. And then she stopped, and Ena disappeared into the compartment. The doors beeped and shut.
Gasping, Mizuki walked and brushed the exterior of the doors as the driver prepared to accelerate. But she was too late. The doors were closed, and Ena was within that compartment.
Why hadn't she... Why had she stopped?
Something rushed through Mizuki's veins. This was stupid. She fought back tears. She looked down. Life really had thrown a wrench at her. She saw with absolute clarity just how much Ena had meant to her. How much N25 had meant to her. How much their absence hurt her.
The platform was empty. The tracks were empty.
Mizuki found tears coming up, again.
She thought... her life had been going good.
In her new university, the students there had accepted her. She had told them her secret. And they had accepted. At first it seemed too good to be true. But there were no snide remarks. No bullying.
She had friends.
But it was... empty.
It was a fact that the Mizuki back then would've done anything for acceptance. To her, it was like an oasis in a desert.
But now she knew she needed more than acceptance. Those people accepted her. But they didn't understand her. They didn't know what she'd been through in middle school. In high school. With N25.
In the end, they didn't really know her.
Mizuki stood there, dumbfounded at herself. It couldn't be helped, right? Slowly, she made her way across the platform and onto the elevator. Part of her was thinking, this was like admitting defeat.
Yet the truth was, if Mizuki hadn't been so distraught, she might have allowed her eyes to continue trailing Ena.
She might have seen Ena standing next to the window.
She might have seen Ena look up and see Mizuki, and widen her eyes with surprise and concern.
Before the train swept her away.
But she hadn't looked, so she didn't see any of that.
A few days later, Mizuki logged onto Nightcord for the first time since the incident. She had finally finished the entire animation. Before sending, she sighed, kicked her legs, attached the music, and listened.
She was a girl, wandering in an abandoned castle. She was presented with glory and riches, food and drink more luxurious than anything she'd ever had. There were orchestras and dances and festivals and parades, all to entice her.
But with every attraction, she was finding herself losing a grip on her own mind. She was sinking deeper into an abyss of her own creation. Confused and desperate, she's trying to escape. She runs and runs, but the castle restrains her. Finally, starving and close to death, she gives in, hating herself for doing so.
She spends days, weeks, months, and then years in that castle. She misses the people she used to know, now gone. But she hopes — she hopes she can find a way to leave one day.
Mizuki found herself smiling sadly as she took her headphones off. Darkness mixed with a little bit of hope. This might be one of the best works they've done recently. Mizuki realised that recently, she usually found herself entranced by the music, the art, the video. But this time, it was like she had been submerged into the world.
That girl, whose story she had been brought into... was like Mizuki's own. She missed N25 and hated herself for not having escaped this room she'd locked herself in. And maybe... the others were feeling the same way, and that's how the music was harmonising so well?
Smiling, Mizuki uploaded it onto their group chat.
Nightcord at 25:00
-24th August-
Mizuki: Here's the final video you've all been waiting for! I swear it's the best we've done so far!
She scrolled through their past messages. As usual, nothing too interesting. Though there was a message in her private chat with Ena... how odd.
A Cute Private Little Chat with Enananananananananananananananananananananan ~~~~~ :D
-21st August-
Enanan: How have you been doing recently?
Enanan: Are you free this week?
Mizuki hesitated.
-24th August-
Amia: I'm sorry, but no.
Amia: Is something wrong?
To her surprise, Ena immediately replied.
Enanan: I saw you the other day in the train station
Enanan: I might be mistaken, but you didn't look well
Oh. So Ena had seen her...? Mizuki paused, thinking of how she could word this. Ena was literally handing her an out.
Amia: I'm ok. Just tired, you know? In university and all. Besides, it was so crowded, so maybe you were mistaken?
Enanan: You better not be using that excuse again...
Mizuki smiles naturally. She's well aware of the truth in Ena's, and well aware of how happy she is right now, that Ena's seeing through her. She can't believe that they are literally texting, almost immediately after one another.
She typed, No! I wouldn't dream of it. I'm perfec|
Then she frowned. This was wrong. Was she trying to block up her door again after Ena had kicked it down?
Mizuki checked her calendar. It's a printed piece of fabric showing the week. Mizuki has two of those, one for the current week and one for the next, so that she could change them once the week was finished. Both were adorned by ribbons and other cute accessories.
Mizuki brooded over. One evening lost wouldn't be that bad, right...? After all, they had just uploaded a video (probably) so there wasn't much to do with N25. And with her projects, it would be ok to take a little break. Mizuki had been feeling unbearably tired for the last few days. It would help to take a break too.
So she changed her message.
Amia: Actually, I think I'm free this Wednesday.
Amia: I assume we're meeting up or something?
Amia: Where are we going?
Enanan: Ok, wait. Give me a break with your questions and let me talk.
Amia: Are we going to shop for some cute clothes :)
Amia: Are we going to
Amia: Oh wait sorry
Amia: Ahem
Amia: ALL ATTENTION TO MS ENANAN STARTING FROM THIS SECOND
Enanan: What? Anyway, I just wanted to check because it's your birthday soon, you know?
Mizuki couldn't help but laugh at Ena's reaction. She could literally see an annoyed Ena bristling at her. She kept laughing.
Amia: Hmm... we didn't celebrate my birthday the last two years, though. Any reason why now...?
Amia: Oh, wait! Enanan must be missing me ~
Mizuki smiled. It was a little hypocritical to say that when she was desperately missing all of N25, but she also desperately missed teasing Ena.
Enanan: Well, I thought it would be a nice break for you
Enanan: I didn't think you'd still be this annoying after 2 years
Enanan: And of course I miss you, idiot
"Oh?" Mizuki said to no one in particular. "You miss me? That's uh, unbelievable." Deep inside, she felt relieved.
Amia: Ok ok! Anyway, there's this place I wanna check out!
She linked the location to Ena.
Enanan: Ok, I'll see you there. Does 4:00 sound good
Amia: Sure, 4:00's absolutely fine!
Mizuki hesitated, deciding what to send next. Part of her was thinking, I just wasted 10 minutes texting to Ena, when I could be working on these designs. But quite obviously she wasn't really feeling in the slightest. In fact, she was filled with a warm happiness in her chest that she hadn't felt in ages.
It was like she was wearing a cute shirt she'd found in her closet from months ago, and was delighted it still fit. So of course she wanted to keep wearing it.
Amia: Ok, I'll be going back to work now
Enanan: Ok, me too
Amia: And like, thanks
Enanan: No problem
Mizuki silently marveled at the way Enanan could express her feelings so openly and easily like that. Ena wore her heart on her sleeve. Mizuki locked her heart in a cage.
Amia: I'll see you then
Amia: The mall, at 4:00
Enanan: Uhh, good joke?
Enanan: But yeah, see you
Inside the cafe they had agreed to meet at, Mizuki waited. Absently, she stared at the menu. She had ordered a strawberry lemonade - she hadn't been very hungry - and by now the empty glass had already been collected. So she waited. Looking out at the sun, the clouds seemed unmoving. And while the sun was certainly setting, it didn't seem to be moving, either.
In the future, we'll all be doing our own thing, right? Kanade and Mafuyu are unsure, but you'll be in art school, and I'll be in fashion, right? So we might not have time for these things in the future, so we should do something only we can do now.
Something jolted Mizuki back to the present. "...Ena!" Mizuki caught sight of the other girl looking for Mizuki in the middle of the cafe. "Ena, here!"
"...Oh. Mizuki." Ena sat down on the other side of the two seater table. "Geez, everyone heard you, you know." She sounded tired and thoroughly irritated by Mizuki.
So Mizuki hesitated. Was Ena actually mad at her...?
"What, cat got your tongue?" Ena flipped open a menu and squinted at it. "Any recommendations?"
"...Yeah." Mizuki paused. She was overreacting. She knew Ena was never really angry at her. So why wasn't she believing that? "You should try one of the parfaits."
Ena nodded, and then tilted her head accusingly. "This looks good — Wait, this is gigantic! I know, you're trying to make me eat too much sweets, right?"
"Wha—" Mizuki stammered. In reality, she had been afraid Ena wouldn't like it, as her tastes might have changed. Not this. "No, I'd never dream of doing that!"
"Really." Ena looked down again.
Mizuki took a deep breath. She wanted Ena to enjoy this. "Um, I can share it with you. Plus it's photogenic! And I can pay!"
Ena paused. "Yeah, that sounds good. Thanks, Mizuki." Ena called to put down her order.
Mizuki smiled, seeing Ena enjoy herself. Part of her felt resentful, because why did Ena believe that she would possibly be trying to taunt her? Then she almost laughed in realisation. Of course because that was something Mizuki would have done! And might have done, if she hadn't been so nervous.
Because Ena was just treating her like her normal self. And that made Mizuki really happy. And in that moment, Mizuki realised that the Ena in front of her was still the Ena she knew. Always keeping an eye out for her.
Mizuki waited for the waiter to go away, and put on her signature smirk and eyebrow tilt. "Then again, doesn't Ena-chan eat enough sweets already?"
Now it was Ena's time to pause, her eyebrows raising. "Just so you know, I've been controlling it very well, just so you know!"
Mizuki widened her eyes. "And Ena's bullying me again!"
"What?!" Ena frowned at her. "You did it first."
"Oh, here's your parfait!" Mizuki grinned energetically.
"Hey, we're not finished talking, ok?" Ena shook her head. "But yeah, this looks good." She took out a sketchbook.
Mizuki smiled. "This looks amazing Ena ~ tell me when I can dig in."
To her surprise, Ena just said, "You can dig in now," perfectly absorbed in her sketchbook.
Mizuki smiled wider and did just that.
"Which one looks better on me, Ena?" Mizuki held up two outfits she had compiled.
"Uh, the left one." Ena replied matter-of-factly.
"Really? Why? I like the other one more," Mizuki pouted.
"Why'd you ask me then?" Ena checked the time, flipping open her phone. 19:00. "I'll get these and I'll go."
"Ok." Mizuki turned around and stared as intently as she could at the outfits.
"Actually, whatever." Ena put her phone away. "I can stay."
"Really? Well, I was planning to go to the sewing lounge after, but..."
"It's fine." Ena nodded. "Come on, let's buy these and go."
Mizuki followed her to the counter. They lined up.
"There's something I want to ask you," Ena said to her as they were waiting in line.
"Uh... yeah?" Mizuki looked up.
"Would you be ok with going to SEKAI later to celebrate?" Ena asks her. A simple question, that Mizuki had dwelled over for so long.
A question that she now easily found the answer to. "Sure." Mizuki did want to, too.
"Nice."
Four hours later, at 23:00, they were walking aimlessly in the shopping mall. and Mizuki was feeling contented with all the stuff she and Ena had bought.
"My arms are hurting," Ena complained. "These bags are so heavy. I knew I should've bought less."
"Ena's still really unathletic, huh," Mizuki mused.
"It's not like you aren't either!"
"Well at least I'm the best in N25."
"Sorry to say, but that's not much of a statement," Ena pointed out.
They bickered for a little bit more before moving on to some more serious topics.
"So how has your art been going recently?"
Ena groaned. "I'm really happy at my own progress, I guess, but I'm literally one of the worst in my year."
Mizuki shook her head fondly. "What did you expect, after getting into the best art university around here? Of course it's competitive."
Ena changed the topic. "What about your school, Mizuki? Are things... going well for you?" She stole an anxious glance at her. Mizuki knew what Ena was truly asking about.
"Yeah."
"That's it? 'Yeah'?"
"Ena calm down, I'm getting to it! Stop bullying me!" she fake pleaded.
"Oh my god, just get to it. I swear you're doing this on purpose." Ena side-eyed her.
"Maybe." Mizuki grinned mischievously. "But yeah, everyone... accepts me there."
"Really? Good for you." Ena nodded. "So you haven't been needing N25 or Empty SEKAI anymore. That figures..." She shook her head. "Anyway, did you like the art museum?"
"Huh? I –" Mizuki stopped. "Um, yeah. I loved it."
"Really."
"Yes! You were so entranced by it, you were bug-eyed the whole time! And you kept talking! And also, the art was really good!" she added.
"Hmm."
"No, actually," Mizuki protested. "I enjoyed how it was interactive."
Ena sighed. "Well, it's not my problem if it didn't suit you, since you made me choose on the spot like last time."
"Yeah." Mizuki smiled sadly. They were thinking the same thing. "I guess that that was... one of the last fun trips we had."
With a glance at Mizuki, Ena quickly changed the topic to something less painful. "Anyway, let's find some hidden corner to get to SEKAI." Ena looked around the shopping mall. "Any ideas?"
"Um, let's go down that hallway to the fire exit. It curves so no one can see us, and no one will be there, anyway."
"Alright." They made their way there.
"Ready?" Mizuki asked. Ena nodded.
She played that quiet music that would bring them to the other world. To any passerby, the music would be smothered by the cheerful buoyant one coming out of the speakers. But it was still playing. Until it ceased, and two girls were transported and brought to another dimension.
They instantly spotted Rin and they entered.
"Hi, Rin!" Ena said, as Mizuki pocketed her phone.
"Oh, it's you." Rin lifted her head from the picture book she was reading. "– Mizuki?"
"Hey, look at that," Mizuki teased, "she's so much more excited to see me."
"I'm not excited." Rin crossed her arms. "I'm just surprised. You haven't been here in so long. Miku and Len are going to be so delighted."
Ena shared a smile with Mizuki. "So, you guys really revamped this place up, huh," Mizuki commented, widening her arms and turning a full circle.
There were stacks of books, a pile of snacks, a heap of music sheets, another heap of drawings, and even a pillow fort made out of pillows.
Ena rolled her eyes. "I wouldn't call it a revamp, exactly."
"Mizuki? Ena?" Luka appeared in the distance, which she was slowly closing. VIRTUAL SINGERS could sense when someone entered the SEKAI they watched over. "Why, isn't this rare?"
Beside Luka was MEIKO. "Mizuki, Ena."
"Hi." Mizuki replied. Everyone was the same. Luka was still being sly, and MEIKO was still looking at them unwaveringly.
"Can't you be a little more surprised?" Luka turned to MEIKO. "After all, Mizuki hasn't been to SEKAI since the last century."
MEIKO ignored her obvious exaggeration. "Is something wrong?" she asked the pair of them.
"Uh, no," Ena replied. "It's just for Mizuki's birthday, really."
"I see." MEIKO commented as Luka arched an eyebrow.
"Are Kanade and Mafuyu coming?" Luka asked.
"Unfortunately, no," Ena answered. "Both of them didn't have time."
"So this is really the new reality." Luka sighed dramatically. "Unfortunately, we don't have a cake for you."
"It's – it's fine," Mizuki answered. Mizuki's brain was reeling, because everyone present seemed just like how they were before.
But also kind of different. Mizuki's memories of them were just reflections on a dirty mirror. Hazy. But the people around Mizuki now were like high-resolution images compared to the mirrored versions of them she remembered.
I guess that I really do need them after all.
"Hey, Ena." Mizuki paused. "I wanted to show you something."
"Yeah?" Ena asked, grumpily. Mizuki had just annihilated Luka, Rin and Ena at the card game for the 36th time while MEIKO silently watched.
"So." Mizuki paused. "It might not be that interesting."
"What is it?" Rin asked, despite herself.
Mizuki took down the ribbon she used to tie her hair. "Take a look." It was a red ribbon, with a seashell and lace strung into it.
"This seashell... Is it...?" Ena looked up at Mizuki.
"Yeah. The one from our day trip." Mizuki smiled.
Ena turned it over and over in her hands. "Why did you want to give me this?"
Mizuki gave her words the weight they deserved. "I – I want to say. I, really missed all of you. So thanks, Ena... for inviting me, you know?
"Mizuki..." Rin said.
"Alright." Ena said simply. "You're welcome." She handed it back. "Looks good on you," she added.
"Oh. Yeah." Mizuki took it. "But like, actually. I thought I didn't need you guys but... not anymore. I've been blinding myself this whole time. So yeah. And I hope we get to do this again."
A little bit of silence.
"The rest are missing out on this," Luka mused happily. "What can I say? Except for, happy birthday, Mizuki."
And just like that, the mood shifted.
"Thanks." Mizuki replied. The rest of the group gave 'happy birthdays' too.
"Look at the time. It's 25:00." Ena smiled and Mizuki knew what she was thinking. "Want to work on something? Kanade's made a new demo, you know."
"That sounds great," Mizuki replied. It was.
Nighcord at 25:00
-27th August-
KAITO: Happy birthday.
Len: Happy birthday, Mizuki. I miss you, so please come to SEKAI more.
Luka: Happy birthday, Mizuki. Another interesting year to look forward to with you.
Miku: I didn't get to say this to you in person, but happy birthday, Mizuki. I hope you'll come to SEKAI again so I can wish you a proper happy birthday.
Rin: Happy birthday, Mizuki. You're less annoying and loud than before and you don't keep on making me try new accessories, but just that I don't like you being too quiet either.
MEIKO: Happy birthday Mizuki. You were being very quiet in the party, but everything seems fine. Remember that SEKAI's always open to you.
Yuki: Happy birthday Mizuki. I enjoy being around you.
K: Happy birthday Mizuki, and thank you for everything you've done for N25.
Enanan: Happy birthday again, Mizuki. It was fun celebrating your birthday so we really should do that more in the future.
Amia: Thank you, all of you.