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Rui was staring at him. Not that such an act was unusual for Rui, but they were supposed to be studying so that they could wrap up in time to watch the recording of a show before bed. The two of them had already weathered quite a few distractions after dinner, from Rui showing Tsukasa a new invention of his to Tsukasa trying to clean up the floor enough for them to work properly. Now that they were settled, there should have been no obstacles to focusing.
A minute passed, then another. Curiosity and impatience swelled together until they were just about ready to burst out of his chest. Tsukasa whipped his head up to look at Rui. "I know it's hard to keep your eyes off of a star, but is there something on my face?!"
Rui blinked, his eyes flickering up to meet Tsukasa's own. "Ah, no…my apologies, I was lost in thought." He paused. Was something troubling him? He had averted his gaze, a slight frown appearing on his face.
"Rui?"
"It's just…the lip balm you used earlier. It looked nice." Rui smiled, a little awkward. Ah, so that was it!
Tsukasa chuckled, reaching for his bag to take out the stick of lip balm. "You should have just asked if you wanted to use it too! Really, you should take better care of your lips. They look quite dry!" He held it out proudly. "It's aloe-infused!"
Rui reached out to take it, his eyes wide. He uncapped it and applied it slowly, and Tsukasa couldn't stop himself from staring as Rui pursed his lips. There was a nice shine to them now. He imagined that the balm had softened them quite a bit. Perhaps Tsukasa should use it again too?
He tore his eyes away when Rui handed the lip balm back to him. After considering it for a second, he stashed the stick back in his bag and cleared his throat.
"Could you—"
"I'm going to turn on the fan," Rui said, getting to his feet.
"You read my mind!" Tsukasa leaned back to look at him. Even though the sun had set, it seemed that the summer heat was still getting to them both. He thanked Rui as the whir of the fan filled the room. "I do wish we didn't have summer homework."
"I agree," Rui said as he returned to his seat. "It is time that could be spent doing much better things, like inventing super cooling jackets or installing a soft serve function on Robo-Nene…hehe, or making a play about a student who discovers that his crush is a monster boy!"
Why did that one sound familiar…? Tsukasa sighed. "Do you think Nene would even agree to that kind of function being added?"
"I don't see why not. It would be a nice treat after a hard day of practice under the sun."
Tsukasa could see the appeal of it. In fact, he was starting to crave ice cream. A huge cone filled with a chocolate and vanilla soft serve mix, perhaps dipped in salted caramel… "Wait wait, we're getting distracted again! Just a few more practice problems and then we can do whatever we want!"
Rui smirked, and Tsukasa had a sinking feeling that he knew what he was going to say. "Oh, I finished mine already. Not to worry, they shouldn't take too long for you either, Tsukasa-kun."
"Hmph! Okay, don't talk to me for the next ten minutes. I'll get this done!!"
It took twenty, but no matter! The important thing was that he didn't give up despite almost getting distracted again by his own fidgeting and stray thoughts about the show ideas that he was itching to write down.
"It's your fault for getting me off track in the first place with the staring," Tsukasa grumbled. He sat next to Rui on the couch, where he had been reading while he waited for Tsukasa to finish.
Rui marked his place and closed the book. The title was in English, and there was an intricate hot air balloon on the cover. Ah, wasn't that Rui's favorite author?
"Like you said, it's hard to keep my eyes off of a star," he teased, though his voice was softer than usual. He wasn't looking up at Tsukasa.
"What's on your mind?" Tsukasa asked. It admittedly came out a little bluntly, but he didn't want Rui to brood about whatever was bothering him all night.
Rui lifted his head, smiling sheepishly. "How direct of you. But it's just like you to notice something like that." He set the book down beside him and turned to face Tsukasa. "I suppose…when I looked at your lips, I became curious about something."
"About…what?" As imaginative as Rui was, there weren't a ton of options for what Rui could possibly think about while staring at Tsukasa's lips. Tsukasa shifted in his seat, his breaths feeling a bit short for some reason.
"It sounds simple enough, but it's something personally unfamiliar to me. And as such, I can't help but wonder about how it would feel, to kiss someone and be kissed in return." Rui laughed shortly. "Of course, I knew it was a line of thought that could make you uncomfortable, so—"
"Would you like to kiss me, Rui?" Tsukasa blurted out. "That is— I mean…I trust you! And you trust me!! So if it's to fulfill curiosity about kissing, I believe it would be best done between the two of us. I can't deny that I'd also like to try it, and who else but my best friend and my director to give me the best experience?"
Rui's face was red, and Tsukasa's was undoubtedly the same. It was only natural, right? After all, kissing on the mouth was generally a couples thing. They weren't a couple, but if it was with Rui, then…
"Okay." Rui brought his hand up to gently hold Tsukasa's face, and he could have sworn his heart stopped for a second. "There's no need to hold back, right?"
"Right!" Tsukasa leaned in. Was he supposed to close his eyes? No, wait, what if he missed? He needed their lips to fit together perfectly! Where were his hands supposed to go? He quickly put them on Rui's waist and felt a shiver go through Rui's body. Before Tsukasa could think about it, Rui closed the gap and pressed his lips against his.
His mind blanked for a moment. Rui was kissing him, and it felt…nice. Amazing. Suddenly remembering that Rui said he wanted to be kissed back, Tsukasa lifted one of his hands to hold the back of Rui's head and kissed him more firmly. Something in his chest trembled at the noise that escaped from his best friend.
They pulled back from each other at the same time, not quite breathless but almost there. Rui sat back, his hands at his lap. His cheeks flushed, his eyes wide with excitement…
"Did you like it?" Tsukasa asked, a little nervous despite the signs pointing to yes. "It was my first kiss, but I think I did quite well!"
As Rui scanned his face, he seemed to calm down. He smiled, but Tsukasa couldn't tell if he was as happy as Tsukasa was. "It was mine, as well. I did enjoy it." He waited, as if searching for the words to say. Or was he waiting for Tsukasa to speak? The moment passed before Tsukasa could get his thoughts together, and Rui stood up. "I'll set up one of my monitors so we can watch the show."
His heart still beating fast, Tsukasa watched as Rui walked to the other end of the room. Was that it? Wasn't there supposed to be something else? Though maybe that was unfair since Tsukasa didn't even know yet what that something was supposed to be.
Tsukasa willed himself to breathe deeply, to get himself together. If Rui didn't think it needed to be a big deal, then maybe he was right. They just…needed to get back to their original plans.
The show that Rui had picked out was so enthralling that Tsukasa almost forgot about what they had done. It was only when he turned to Rui afterward that the scene flashed through his head — the feeling of Rui's hair through his fingers, the gentleness in his eyes as they pulled away from each other. Rui wore a similar look now, but it quickly faded as he turned off the screen and moved to clear the floor again.
"I'll get out the futon for you, and we can talk about the show before we fall asleep. How does that sound?"
It was a setup that Tsukasa was used to. It was one of his favorite parts about sleeping over at Rui's place, actually. Late night phone calls were nice, but getting to be in the same space as his best friend, speaking in soft tones until sleep took them both…there was nothing quite like it.
"Good," Tsukasa said as he got up from the couch. "I'm going to get another glass of water, do you want anything?" Seeing Rui shake his head, Tsukasa left the garage.
When he was out of Rui's line of sight, Tsukasa sighed. The more he told himself to not think about it, the harder it became to not turn the scene over in his head: his first kiss, shared with the person he trusted most in his life. He'd really liked it. It seemed Rui had enjoyed it too, so would it be so strange to ask for it again? But Rui hadn't said anything else afterward or given them much of a chance to talk about it. Was it really just simple curiosity about kissing?
Tsukasa mentally shook himself off. He didn't want this to get in the way of them enjoying their evening together. The weird feeling in his chest could wait.
He had been expecting Rui's parents to be asleep, so he was caught off guard when he saw Rui's mother sitting at the kitchen counter with a notepad in hand. She looked up when Tsukasa entered and gave him a smile. "Good evening, Tsukasa. Did you two enjoy your show?"
"We did! Rui is always good at choosing them, even if it's one that's not great quality so that we can figure out what we would do differently." Tsukasa grinned proudly. "I feel like I always pick up something new after watching shows or movies with him."
Her smile softened, and Tsukasa was struck by the resemblance between Rui and his mother. Physically, they didn't look much alike, but their expressions seemed to be where the similarities shined through. "I'm glad to hear that. Rui often talks about how much fun he has with you too, you know." She tapped her chin with her pen. "In fact, just the other day he was talking and chuckling to himself about everything he wanted to show you today when you came over."
His cheeks grew warm. Who wouldn't be happy hearing that their best friend talked about them so fondly like that? "I shouldn't keep him waiting, then! I'm sure he'll have a lot to talk about regarding the show." After grabbing a cup of water and wishing her a good night, Tsukasa returned to the garage.
Rui was sitting at the couch again, his hands clasped at his lap. He lifted his head when Tsukasa approached, a small smile on his lips. "I thought I heard you talking. Were either of my parents awake?"
"Yes, I spoke briefly with your mother. She told me about how excited you were to have me over today," Tsukasa said without thinking. He settled down on the futon and looked up at Rui, blinking when he caught a glimpse of his embarrassed face before he got up to turn the lights off.
"She didn't need to do that," Rui grumbled lightly, though he didn't seem mad at all.
"I'm glad she did," Tsukasa said. It wasn't that he didn't already know Rui liked spending time with him. It was just…Rui always had a busy mind, so Tsukasa couldn't help but be pleased that Rui thought about him a lot even outside of their shows. "It always makes me happy when we have nights together like this."
He couldn't see Rui's face, but he heard him carefully step around the futon to lay down on the couch. He listened to Rui's deep breaths before he moved, presumably turning to face Tsukasa's direction. "I had fun watching the show with you. What did you want to talk about first?"
The first thought that came to mind wasn't about the show, but Tsukasa tucked it away for later. He recalled what had caught his attention most while they were watching. "About the twist at the climax…I couldn't take my eyes off of the dancing! The protagonist being completely still in the midst of it all really drove home his shock."
"Mm. I was impressed by the choreography as well, and the lead certainly did a good job conveying his feelings about the betrayal, especially in the song afterward…"
It was relaxing, to listen to Rui's soft voice in the dark. With his eyes closed, Tsukasa found that his own words came quieter, slower, until a gradual silence enveloped both of them.
In the brief period of time that Wonderlands x Showtime had before they started working with the next troupe, they had decided to continue their training routines on their own. More often than not, they ended up meeting up at the park anyway. Tsukasa tried to catch his breath as he sank onto a bench in the shade, his legs burning after his run. He made a face as he felt his shirt sticking to his back.
A bottle of water appeared in his vision, and he turned his head to see Nene holding it out to him. She looked just as worn out as him, strands of hair escaping her ponytail from the workout that she must have been doing nearby as he ran around the park. "Thank you," he murmured, taking the bottle and drinking almost the whole thing. She sat beside him on the bench and sighed.
"It's too hot today. Maybe we should call it a day?"
It was certainly the reasonable option. None of them wanted to train to the point of collapsing in the heat. But…for some reason, Tsukasa still felt restless despite his exhaustion. "I'll see how I'm feeling after one more lap," he said.
Nene studied him for a moment. "You've been pushing yourself a lot today. Even more than usual, I mean."
Was he? He supposed he had run faster for longer in his previous laps. And he'd added a few more sets to his core workout routine. And…
Okay, maybe he'd had a lot of energy to burn. So why did he feel so antsy, even now? He wasn't sure even the additional lap would help him. His eyes searched the expanse of the park, landing on the tiny figures of Emu and Rui in the distance.
Nene followed his gaze and hummed. "It looks like they're doing stretches to cool down. Let's go join them."
With a grunt, Tsukasa stood and started following behind Nene. Maybe it wasn't the run that he needed. A nice shower and a nourishing meal would probably help him feel more himself when he got home! Perhaps he could make curry before his parents and Saki returned. That, along with the bottle of peach-essenced sparkling water that he'd put in the fridge this morning, would surely do the trick.
The sun beat down upon them as they walked. The light breeze carried only hot, humid air. "Rui suggested adding a soft serve function to Robo-Nene," Tsukasa said, recalling the conversation from last night.
Nene gave him a wry smile. "You know, on a day like this, I couldn't even say no to something like that. It certainly wouldn't be the weirdest feature he gave her."
Tsukasa laughed. He didn't know how such a function would even work with Robo-Nene, but if anyone could make it happen, it was Rui.
"Nene-chan!! Tsukasa-kun!!" Emu had noticed them approaching and had jumped up to wave at them, projecting her voice as much as possible. There weren't that many people in the park, but the few who were enjoying their stroll turned to look at Tsukasa and Nene. Nene's face turned a shade of red distinct from the flush of exertion from her workout.
Smirking, Tsukasa inhaled and prepared himself. Nene's eyes widened, and she had just enough time to cover her ears before—
"EMU!!!!! RUI!!!!!"
A moment of silence followed. A flock of birds fled the trees nearby.
"Can you guys not?!" Nene griped, scowling as she lowered her hands. She picked up her pace to get away from him, and Tsukasa chuckled and started running, not willing to fall behind.
"Did you guys finish exercising too?" Emu asked, bouncing on her feet. "I saw Tsukasa-kun earlier, going all fwoom papapa whoosh across the park!!"
"Yeah, we figured we should wrap up and go home soon since it's only going to get hotter." Nene stretched out her arms. "What I wouldn't do for some ice cream right now…"
"Oh!! Then let's all meet back up for parfaits after we go home!" Emu's eyes glimmered with excitement. "I want to try the extra tall sparkle strawberry popping parfait!"
"Is that the actual name…?" Tsukasa asked skeptically. He glanced at Rui, only for Rui to avert his eyes immediately. His restlessness worsened with the sinking feeling in his chest. He cleared his throat. "I'll join you! I was thinking something sweet would do me good anyway."
"What about you, Rui-kun?" Emu asked, turning her smile onto him.
"Of course. How could I turn down such an offer? Shall we meet at the diner in two hours, then? That should give us enough time."
Why wouldn't Rui look at him? Tsukasa didn't want to call him out, but it was getting harder to ignore. He had thought things were okay between them when Tsukasa left his place this morning, so why…?
Tsukasa swallowed, his throat feeling dry again. He drank the rest of the water that Nene had given him. "Okay, then let's finish our stretches and get going!" he said, deciding that he definitely needed to talk to Rui in private later.
Tsukasa found two texts waiting for him when he got out of the shower. "Did something happen between you and Rui?" from Nene. "I'm here if you want to talk about anything!!!" from Emu. Had it really been obvious that something was off? Tsukasa smiled a little to himself as he thanked Emu and let Nene know that he'd try to figure it out later today. He was grateful to have such perceptive friends who didn't hesitate to reach out to him when they were concerned.
Luckily, the air wasn't as awkward as he'd feared when they all sat down at a booth together. Rui even looked at him a couple of times, and Tsukasa wondered if he had received texts from Emu and Nene as well. Regardless of what was going on, neither of them ever wanted to worry their friends.
To his shock, Emu's parfait really was called the extra tall sparkle strawberry popping parfait. They weren't kidding about the "extra tall" part either, and Tsukasa immediately ordered an extra tall blueberry and lemon parfait for himself after seeing the pictures. Nene gladly accepted Emu's offer to share hers, seemingly intimidated by the long list of flavors that the diner was offering as part of their summer special. Rui chose a simple chocolate and almond flavor.
The conversation naturally drifted from one topic to another, and Tsukasa found it easy to relax. By the time their parfaits arrived, he had almost forgotten about the tension he'd noticed earlier at the park.
"Yours looks good, Tsukasa-kun." Rui smiled at him, and Tsukasa felt a sudden thrill. Rui had finally spoken to him directly after what felt like a whole day! He wasn't sure what had changed, but he grinned back.
"Do you want some of it? I'll graciously allow you a bite!"
After a moment of hesitation, Rui leaned toward him, his mouth slightly open. It was unexpected to say the least and far too cute. Tsukasa hurriedly took a spoonful of both the blueberry and lemon flavors and held it up to Rui's mouth. He watched, flustered, as Rui swallowed and made a happy little sound.
"Wowow, Tsukasa-kun shared his parfait before even taking a bite himself!" Emu exclaimed.
"Don't make me sound like I'm not usually generous!" Tsukasa pointedly took a large scoop for himself and shoved it into his mouth. With the spoon that he had just used to feed Rui. Whatever, this was nothing when their lips had already touched!
"Do you want some of mine as well?" Rui asked, holding up a spoonful of ice cream. As baffled as he was at the sudden change in Rui's behavior, Tsukasa couldn't let an opportunity like this slip by! He leaned in and took the offering, smiling as he tasted the sweet, rich chocolate.
"Nene-chan, do you not like the partfait? You're making a wurbly gurbly face!"
"Huh? No, it tastes good. Thanks for sharing it with me."
As they all dug in, Tsukasa studied Rui's face. These exchanges between them were new. He couldn't name what had changed other than their kiss last night. But then…he couldn't explain Rui's odd avoidance during their training, either. Perhaps he'd ask Rui to come over after they finished their parfaits.
As they reached the end of their desserts, Rui turned to meet his gaze. Tsukasa stubbornly refused to cease his staring, and to his surprise, Rui didn't look away. Instead, he gave Tsukasa a tiny smile that could almost be described as embarrassed.
Interesting.
When they got up from their booth, Emu and Nene bid them farewell and went off in the direction of the mall. Apparently, they'd chatted in advance about wanting to go shopping for teas and possibly a new set of headphones for Nene. After seeing them off, Tsukasa turned to face Rui.
"Rui—"
"Tsukasa-kun—"
They blinked at each other before smiling. Rui gestured for him to continue, and Tsukasa cleared his throat. "Come over to my place! I want to talk to you."
"Oya? I hope I'm not in any trouble," Rui said lightly. "I am glad you suggested it, though. I also wish to speak with you about something."
So Rui knew that he'd been acting strangely! That was fine, they could hash this out and go back to normal again. "No time to waste, then! Let's talk, and maybe you can stay over for dinner. I plan on making curry before my family returns."
"You'd be willing to make an entire batch without vegetables? For me?"
"No, you'll get the same thing as everyone else." He knew Rui was giving him an offended look as they walked side-by-side, but he ignored it. "Carrots and potatoes and onions! They're not too bad, are they?!" Even as he spoke, he knew for a fact that Rui would be dumping all of his vegetables onto Tsukasa's plate, and for some inexplicable reason, Tsukasa would allow it.
"I can't help but notice that you aren't including your detested green peppers in the curry. Why must I suffer when you won't?"
"The Tenma family recipe doesn't include green peppers in the first place," Tsukasa said flatly. "And I don't detest them!"
"And here I thought I could have made an ally of you," Rui said quietly, obviously for dramatic effect. Unable to resist, Tsukasa glanced at him. He sighed deeply upon seeing the fake tears welling up in Rui's eyes. Really, he was far too good at that.
"We'll see what happens during dinner," Tsukasa grumbled. They both knew it translated to Fine, I'll eat them for you.
The walk back to Tsukasa's house didn't take long. Tsukasa unlocked the door, removed his shoes, and led Rui up to his room. When the door clicked shut behind them, he took a deep breath and looked at Rui. "I saw you trying not to look at me whenever we crossed paths during our training at the park."
"Straight to the point, hm?" Rui sounded a little sheepish. "Yes, I…was having a bit of a difficult time. Through no fault of your own."
"A difficult time? With what?"
Rui turned around and walked away to Tsukasa's bed, sitting down on the edge and clasping his hands together. When he looked up, his face was red. "I couldn't stop thinking about kissing you."
In the seconds that followed, Tsukasa couldn't figure out what he was feeling. His face was warm, but the rest of his body felt like shivering. He took a step forward, then another, until he was standing in front of Rui. Realizing that Rui was staring up at him, his face falling by the second, Tsukasa hurriedly sat next to him and put his hand atop Rui's.
"Then let's kiss. It's not like either of us to hesitate with what we want."
Rui's eyes widened. The growing smile was beautiful on his face. As they both leaned forward, Tsukasa closed his eyes, trusting Rui to let their lips fit together perfectly. He focused on the feeling of Rui's lips on his own, kissing, kissing, kissing more until finally, the restlessness that had been haunting him vanished. He opened his eyes again only when Rui pulled away to press a kiss to Tsukasa's jaw.
"I apologize for worrying you. I had thought the one kiss would be enough to satisfy me, but…I suppose I just keep wanting more and more with you, Tsukasa-kun. I have never liked someone so much, and I don't quite know what to do with the feeling," Rui admitted with a laugh.
When was the last time he had felt such intense, unadulterated elation? Tsukasa grinned as he stood up and held out a hand. "Then I'll keep giving us both what we want! Go out with me, Rui! I can't say I have a full grasp on these feelings either, but I do know I like you! I want to figure this out with you!"
Rui put his hand on Tsukasa's, and Tsukasa pulled him up and straight into his arms. He squeezed him in a hug and felt Rui wrap his arms around him in return. "You're shaking," Rui said in wonder.
Was he? "Perhaps I'm just bursting with energy!" Tsukasa declared. "It must have been your kisses sending me straight to 12000%!"
"Hehe, then perhaps I should be kissing you before every rehearsal and show."
At that, Tsukasa pulled out of the hug and looked at Rui expectantly. Rui raised a brow. "I didn't say now," he teased, "and if I kiss you more, you may overload and reach the moon even without one of my devices."
Tsukasa impatiently stomped his foot, and Rui burst into laughter. He gave Tsukasa a brief kiss before reaching to hold his hand. Tsukasa smiled, pleased. "I do have a question, still."
"Hm?"
"You stopped avoiding me when we went out for parfaits. Why is that?"
"Ah…I spoke with my mom when I went home to shower and change." Rui chuckled. "I believe she saw that I was having a hard time, so I ended up sharing that I was worried about my feelings being a burden to you." His smile softened. "She…told me that you and I looked the exact same kind of happy when talking about each other. It gave me hope."
Tsukasa wondered if both of them had that kind of face right now. He certainly liked how it looked on Rui. "You should already know what I'm going to say about you thinking that your feelings will burden me."
"I know," Rui said. "Tsukasa-kun can shoulder any burden, right?" When Tsukasa frowned at him, Rui lifted a hand to caress his face. "I do know. My feelings are in your care, my star."
"And mine are in yours!" As Tsukasa gave Rui another kiss, he realized it didn't need to be complicated. He liked Rui, Rui liked him. They would keep going to school and keep doing shows together. And as partners, boyfriends, they'd figure out how love would look in their lives.