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The strong winds above the coast of the Earth Kingdom were relentless, whipping Sokka’s ponytail around as Appa cut through heavy cloud cover. Down below, among the cliffs, was the site Aang had spent weeks identifying as somewhere that could be hiding ancient Air Nomad relics. Aang was at the front, sat on Appa’s head with Katara leaning on his shoulder. Toph and Zuko were chatting at the front of the saddle, and Sokka sat at the back with Momo to keep him company, looking out over the landscape and sighing. It was nearing the anniversary of the Siege of the North, when Sokka watched as his first true love, Princess Yue, made the ultimate sacrifice, becoming the Moon Spirit to restore the balance of the world during the Fire Nation’s siege on the North Pole.
Sokka started listening in to Toph and Zuko’s conversation.
“We need to make sure we don’t land somewhere riddled with traps set by The Denied before the assault on Republic City. They even tripped up Tagah when he was going insane at us, and we don’t have Kallik or Suki here with us this time to help keep an eye out for them.” Zuko said.
Sokka’s jaw clenched. Tagah and his assault. That ancient Airbender who almost levelled Republic City merely months ago. The rogue Airbender who tried to overrule Aang’s authority as the Avatar, who tried to turn him against the very group friends that helped him end the Hundred Year War, and who even for a moment, killed every member of the group except Aang and Suki.
Tagah, the power-hungry maniac that Zuko of all people had called “very attractive”. Sokka had been seething about that ever since. It was in the bone structure, Zuko had explained. The bone structure. As far as Sokka was concerned, something was always off about Tagah. Why did it matter how nice his jawline was? Why did everyone always have to gush over how hunky he was? Why did Sokka always have to hear about how Tagah’s so cool and huge and buff and handsome?
“You’re doing that thing again.” A voice drawled from Sokka’s left.
Sokka jumped, looking down to see Toph standing beside him, leaning against the edge of the saddle.
“Doing what thing?” Sokka replied, keeping his voice low.
“Brooding.” Toph said bluntly, a smirk forming on her lips. “Your heart is thumping around like a startled turtleduck, and you’re so stiff I wouldn’t be shocked to see you snap in half.”
Toph leaned closer, lowering her volume to a whisper as she continued. “Still thinking about Zuko calling that big Airbender guy hot, aren’t ya?”
“I am not.” Sokka hissed, his cheeks starting to heat up. “I… am just thinking about this trip. Trying to look out for traps like Zuko was talking about.”
Toph crossed her arms. “Of course you’re listening to Zuko. Look Sokka, your heartbeat goes crazy every time he so much as breathes near you nowadays. It’s absolutely pathetic. If you don’t snap out of it or do something about it yourself, I’m gonna stand up right now, march over to the front and ask Zuko if he thinks you’re attractive. We can see if your bone structure measures up?”
Sokka’s eyes went wide in panic. “You wouldn’t.”
“Try me.” Toph whispered, grinning wide. “I’ll make it real loud. Make sure Aang and Katara hear it too.”
“Fine, whatever!” Sokka snapped. “I’ll talk to him at some point, just let me do it on my own. No meddling.” He sat down and crossed his arms, muttering under his breath about how Toph just had to know everything.
“I can hear you!” Toph shouted over her shoulder as she walked away.
Sokka’s chest tightened. Toph was right, Sokka was completely gone on Zuko, and that frightened him, especially as those feelings mixed with the profound grief overcoming him as the anniversary of the loss of Yue approached.
The Southern Air Temple was silent aside from the footsteps of the group as they made their way around. Sunlight filtered through high windows, illuminating ancient relics and fading murals, some from before the War and some compiled from Aang and the group’s previous trips. Sokka found himself in a quiet corner leaning against a wall, paying little attention to the search for more pieces of Air Nomad history.
A shadow fell over the floor in front of him. Sokka turned around to find Zuko standing in front of him, his arms folded.
“Did I do something Sokka? I feel like you’ve been avoiding me all day.” Zuko said, locking eyes with Sokka as he stepped closer. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing!” Sokka replied quickly, taking a step back to be right up against the wall. “Just… enjoying some peace and quiet, y’know? Real serene around here.”
Zuko just stared at him as if to confirm he was finished, clearly not buying it. A faint smile then formed on his lips, as if he’d had an epiphany. “Are you still thinking about what I said about Tagah?”
Sokka froze up. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Zuko raised an eyebrow. “Right… because you haven’t glared at me every time someone mentions him. It’s interesting, you know, how worked up you get over what I say about other people. Am I supposed to just ignore the things you’ve said about me?
“What’s… that supposed to mean?” Sokka asked, flustered.
Zuko took a step closer to Sokka. “Remember our time in the Spirit World? When I took on the appearance of an elderly man momentarily?”
Sokka’s face flushed bright red as he was truck by the memory of what he said struck him. Zuko! What happened to your beautiful face?
“I… that… was… just objective! Everyone knows you’re a looker Zuko, I’m sure half the Fire Nation would get in line if you just said the word!”
“I’m sure. So you don’t personally think I’m beautiful then?” Zuko teased, brushing hands with Sokka.
“I didn’t say that!” Sokka exclaimed, almost cutting off the end of Zuko’s sentence.
Zuko beamed. “So you do think so, thanks Sokka. Does that have anything to do with your reaction to what I said about Tagah, by any chance?”
Sokka’s breath hitched. Zuko’s words felt charged, as if to signal that Sokka wasn’t the only one who felt a certain way. Sokka opened his mouth as if to stammer out some sort of reply, but Zuko’s smile, and the earnest look he was giving back at Sokka, stopped him dead in his tracks. The silence between them was unbearable for Sokka, while he was sure Zuko was thoroughly entertained.
Before Sokka could muster the courage to speak up, or Zuko could say anything else, Aang’s voice echoed throughout the temple. “Guys! You have to all come see what I found!”
Zuko backed away from Sokka slowly. “We’re coming back to this.” Zuko said softly, turning and walking towards the sound of Aang’s voice, and leaving Sokka leaning against the wall in stunned silence, his heart pounding.
Night fell over the Patola Mountains, painting the temple in silver moonlight. Overlooking the temple gardens and the valleys below, the full moon hung high among the stars. Sokka sat just back from the cliff’s edge in front of the entrance to the gardens, staring up at the sky with his knees pulled up to his chest. He knew what the full moon meant. It was the anniversary of the Siege of the North.
Sokka heard soft footsteps approach behind him, breaking the silence. He didn’t turn around, but he knew who to expect to see sitting next to him if he glanced to his side.
“I thought I might find you out here.” Zuko said quietly, gently putting his hand on Sokka’s shoulder.
Sokka looked up at the moon, his throat feeling tight. “Every year… it hits just as hard, all over again… maybe even harder every year that goes by. I just… miss her.” He swallowed, his voice thick with emotion. “And… and I sit here every year thinking about how it was all my fault, even though I know it wasn’t, and I sit here... thinking about what I could’ve done differently that whole day, that whole time we were at the North Pole.”
Zuko rubbed circles on Sokka’s back. “Don’t blame yourself, Sokka.”
The pair of them sat there in silence for a moment before Zuko spoke again. “I want to sit here and do this with you every time from now on.”
“But you never even knew her!” Sokka shouted suddenly, standing up and looking down at Zuko with tears forming in his eyes.
Zuko looked up at Sokka tenderly. “I know enough about her to know how strong she was… and how much I regret having even a small part in what happened that night. You don’t deserve to grieve alone, Sokka. No one deserves to grieve alone, ever.”
The sincerity with which Zuko spoke made Sokka break. Tears spilled down his face as he started to sob. For the first time in years though, the grief he felt didn’t feel like a weight pinning him down. It felt like a weight being shared, carried by more than just him. It was a weight carried by him and the man he cared for most deeply, and he needed to get that off his chest.
“After Yue…” Sokka started through tears, “I felt like I was broken for a long time, but I couldn’t… show it or it’d throw off what… what we were on a mission to do. But when Suki and I were together, she helped me heal so much. She taught me that my heart could open up to love again… and even though we were better off just as friends I’ll… always love her for that. Now… there’s… someone else I want to let in like that.”
Sokka took a deep breath and sniffled, continuing. “And… I know you probably know it’s you, Zuko, because I know I’m probably the least subtle guy there is and I know you were gonna tell me that earlier, how… stupid I was to be so jealous about what you said about Tagah. It was just… I’m so far gone on you, and I was… so… so scared to… admit that.”
Zuko smiled softly, standing up and reaching out to cup Sokka’s face and wipe away a tear with his thumb. “You don’t have to be scared, Sokka. I’m here for you. I’m here for you now, I’ve been here for you before, and I will continue to be here for you. Always, Sokka.”
Sokka put a hand of his own on Zuko’s cheek and looked at him through still-teary eyes. Zuko nodded at him and closed the gap between them to put his lips on Sokka’s. The kiss was soft, slow and warm. Sokka melted into it, reaching up to tangle his fingers in Zuko’s hair. It was bittersweet for it to happen on the night it did, but Sokka was relieved to find out that while he now felt he could share his grief, he now also knew that his feelings were shared, and his love for Zuko wouldn’t go in vain.
Some time later, in the Fire Nation Royal Palace, the heavy crimson curtains of the Fire Lord’s bedroom flapped gently against the open window in the cool midnight breeze.
The peace in the room was suddenly interrupted when Sokka shifted in his sleep somewhat violently, trying to shout but only managing for a muffled gasp to escape from his mouth. “Zuko!”
Sokka jerked awake in a cold sweat, his chest heaving and his eyes wide. Almost instantly, Zuko woke up too, gently removing himself from Sokka’s arms and rolling over to face Sokka. Still half-asleep, Zuko reached up and cupped the side of Sokka’s face with his warm hands and pulling him in to rest their foreheads together, letting Sokka breath a little to calm down before wrapping his arms around Sokka’s torso.
“I’m here, Sokka. You’re still in bed. Everything’s alright.” Zuko whispered, his voice thick and a little groggy.
Sokka let out a long, shaky breath and buried his face into the crook of Zuko’s neck, holding him just as tight.
“Bad… dream.” Sokka muttered. “I… couldn’t… you… I tried to stop you from… I lost you… and I…”
“Hey. I’ve got you Sokka.” Zuko interjected, saving Sokka from his own rambling. “I’m here, remember? Always here Sokka.”
Sokka took a deep breath, his heart slowly settling to match the rhythm of Zuko’s. “I know. Sorry I woke you up.”
“No apologising. That’s my job to help you when you’re like that.” Zuko murmured.
Sokka cracked a small smile. “Love you Zuko.”
“I love you too.” Zuko replied, hooking a leg over Sokka’s under the blankets. “Go back to sleep, I’ve got you.”
Sokka closed his eyes and let himself drift back off to sleep in Zuko’s arms.