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I opened the door to find Lucien laying across the coach
“Hey” he called sitting up
After hanging up my coat up and went to sit by him
“Have you talked to her” I asked
“Not yet” He said leaning against me
I felt my throat tighten as a prepared for my next statement
“Lucien I think it might be best if you take the lead if thats alright”
He looked at me for awhile before saying “ok”
“Let’s go talk to her” I said standing up
Lucien knocked on Jasmine’s Jaz's room
“Jaz” he called, a bark replied “Jaz if you don’t answer I’m coming in”
Silence
Lucien creaked the door open to find Jaz sitting on the very edge of her bed her shoulder leaning against the wall Spud laying across her lap. she glanced up before looking back at her feet Lucien sat down on the opposite corner of the bed from her leaving me to stand awkwardly beside him. We stayed there in silence for awhile until he look over at her “Jaz?”
She said nothing
“What happened?”
Still nothing
Lucien waited and suddenly I came to the realization I’d never actually watched him discipline her I was only ever told it had happened and that they talked and I guess I never really thought of what his approach was.
“I don’t know how to control myself and I lashed out” Jaz said quickly
“Jaz for the last time this isn’t cute” Lucien said sternly and again I was forced to realize I’d never heard this tone before, maybe because I never gave him the opportunity.
“But I’m traumatized” Jaz said glaring at him
“Jaz I’m serious stop it”
“I need to be sav-“ Jaz started
“I really don’t care” Lucien said back the room feel into silence again “come on, what happened?”
Jaz looked back down at her feet
And Lucien looked at her softly
And they sat there on the bed saying nothing
Jaz turned her head slightly toward Lucien “Jackson”
I expected Lucien to asked another question but he just waited for her to continue until he gave up “and?”
“Jackson called me a rescue kid”
“Piece of shit” Lucien muttered immediately, Jaz looked up at him in a way that made me think she was used to him being like that. I looked down at the back of his head “sorry, go ahead”
“Then he got in my face” Lucien nodded “so I punched him”
“Ah” Lucien said
“I know it was wrong”
“I know you do” Lucien said “but he was wrong too”
Jaz ignored him “I know it was bad of me”
“Good”
“You’re really bad at this”
Lucien shrugs
Jaz shot him a look of contempt
“I’m starving” Lucien said standing up Jaz’s look continued “you want chips?”
Jaz just kept looking
“You want chips” Lucien said as a statement this time “We’ll leave in 5”
And as Lucien walked away, Jaz’s gaze followed him out the door before snapping back up to me. I followed him out softly closing the door behind me
He went into our room to put on shoes. I just sat behind him unsure if I should get ready to leave too
“Is that what you did last time too?” I asked softly
“Pretty much” He said matching my volume
“Maybe” I said slowly because given the introspections I have been doing I’m not sure I’m on the right side of the argument “Maybe we should emphasize that she did something wrong”
Lucien stays quiet for a while, and I let him before he takes a breath “But he did something wrong too and maybe they are both in the wrong but I am on her side in this and I want her to know that”
I buried that in my brain to think through later but first I thought through their conversation “Why’d you say” I sit up a bit straighter and do my best Lucien O’Donnell impression “for the last time this isn’t cute”
Lucien laughs under his breath before taking another long pause, and again I let him “because she does that she makes all the openings for blame to be placed on her because she is waiting for us to place all the blame on her and realize we don’t want to deal with her anymore”
I think about that for awhile before I hear Jaz call “Luc what is taking is long”
“That makes sense” I whisper to Lucien. He gives me a tight smile and we head downstairs I watch them leave and get in the car. I stand outside the door and right before Lucien starts backing up I recognize the look he is giving Jaz the one she doesn’t notice because she is looking out the window the one he gives to Bridget sometimes and to his mother often but mostly the look he gives me when I’m not looking the one that says he loves me and that he is on my side.