Work Text:
Carefully, he puts the last doll in place. In a sequence, they almost look like they’re dancing. almost. But their keys are broken and there is no way to properly fix them without rebuilding. Moreover, they are all too important to him for him to let Rui do that. Of course, he trusted the purple haired inventor but he wouldn’t really risks it. Rui has the tendency to add new things to fix goods that he doesn’t particularly agree on.
Though, if it wasn’t because of Rui, he wouldn’t even be here to play with these dolls in the first place. He couldn’t remember what happened but from the stories people tell him, it seemed like he was sent into the war and somehow made it back alive. At the cost of his arms.
He woke up at a hospital after the war settled with no memories. Nothing about himself, or his life before the war or even about the war itself. A kind nurse explained to him how he was brought back from the field and was in some sort of a vegetative state for 2 month. His memory lost was probably due to trauma or a concussion and he was sent home after a few weeks of monitoring.
Though ‘home’ might be a stretch. He didn’t have anywhere to go. No family, or house. It was almost as if he was born on the battle field with nothing.
Luckly, he met Emu just outside the hospital immediately after his stay. The pink haired girl was strolling down the road in a pink jumpsuit, a bright colour in the middle of an awfully monotoned city. She stood out like a sore thumb. And maybe he did too, with loose empty sleeves waving in the wind in the place of hands.
Emu greeted him like an old friend -maybe even something more- but he can’t remember her. Yet the drop of his heart at her sadness was weirdly familiar.
She told him everything about himself as she fidgets with a makeshift Forget-me-not bracelet on her wrist, which was ironic considering the situation. From there he learned his name, Tenma Tsukasa. Tenma as in pegasus and Tsukasa as in to rule. and her, Otori Emu. Otori as in an old dragon tale and Emu as in smile. He thought it was a very fitting name for her.
With the biggest smile he has ever seen, Emu spoke about him as if he was important to her. No, as if Tenma Tsukasa was important to her. He couldn’t even tell if he was the man she’s talking about. The memories she’s combing through are all absent to him.
But her words are soft and comforting. Her smile endearing, he finds it sweet how this Tsukasa was remembered by her. She was also the one to introduce him to Rui, an odd inventor who ‘brings out the best of everything he touches’ or so he was told.
He isn’t sure why exactly he was introduced to this inventor. Maybe it was pity? Because the second he step foot into his workshop the man seemed to soften at his condition. And after a few exchange with Emu, he built the blond arms out of tin. And offered him a maintainence job at a clock building he helped build. With that, he lives a new life completely devoided of his old one.
Well, maybe not completely devoided.
He is due a check up today, for maintainance on his tin arms. Rui might be a very talented young inventor but all things need to be repaired and refurnished in time.
He counts down the gears until it turns 12. Just as the bell rings and the arrows stilled, he makes his way out of the clock. Down the streets and into the world. He is human, yes. But a part of him finds it easier to connect with gears and mechanics rather than real, living beings. Nevertheless, he glances over the people around expectantly.
“TSUKASAAAAAA” her voice rings all across the square, but Tsukasa can pin point where she is on his first try. Out of the alley beside the candy store, exactly 3 minutes after it turns 12, with her signature pink jumpsuit bouncing towards him.
Tsukasa lets her tackles him off the ground, giggling as she nuzzles into his chest. An “i missed youuuuu” muffles against the fabric of his vest yet Tsukasa could already memorise how each letter from her mouth feels on his body. She’s a very physical person after all.
He peels her off his torso with a grin. “Let’s go, Rui’s waiting for us” personally, Tsukasa couldn’t care less about Rui waiting for them at his workshop, but he rather have her snuggling against him not in the middle of the square.
Obediently, she lets his torso go, but kept on holding onto his arm. Emu practically pulled him towards the end of the town, where an antic workshop sits peacefully. “Rui isn’t around today! I will be the one to fix you right up!” Emu beamed as she opens the door of the place, the familiar scent of wood and oil already filling his nose. For some reason though, Emu never smells like the shop, just… Emu, he supposed.
“Really? Why didn’t you told me that earlier?” Tsukasa sets his hat on the only empty space on a table. Like the owners, the workshop is filled with wonder and colour, ever multiplying until the shop is at the verge of exploding and covering the town with colours it has never seen before. Such as the colour of Emu’s cheeks as she tries on his hat.
Tsukasa makes a mental note to make sure Rui never makes the shop explode.
Tsukasa stifles a giggle, “what are you doing? It’s way too big on you”. He tries to get it off her but she spins out of his reach. “Maybe, but I think it suits me.” Orange on her? Yes, absolutely. But not the dust and dullness of it. Tsukasa would rather have her wear new and clean things.
Eyes fixate on her smile as she spins around in front of a mirror Tsukasa is jealous of his past self. How can he have this angel all to himself and not share with him. How come he can’t remember the memories he had made with this beautiful pink girl.
Before he knew it, she has stopped spinning. Emu looks directly at him, her smile no longer reaching her eyes. And Tsukasa’s heart drops. His stomach churns for reasons he cannot identify.
“I think it’s time for your check up now” she lightly puts the hat on the table next to her with a soft thump. Tsukasa feels like he should appologize but for what exactly? For not remembering, maybe. But he had done that before and the smile Emu puts on as she tells him that it’s okay was worse than this.
So he kept his mouth shut as he unbuttons his vest and shirt. The mechanical hands was attached to him directly so it would be easier for him to live without a caretaker. The sound of wood against wood echoes throughout the cabin as Emu drags a chair in front of her. She pats on it to invite him to sit and he does.
The check up was routine, even if it was usually Rui who does it, Emu wasn’t a stranger to the gears of his prostetic. She starts from his right fingers, humming a tune as she tighten loose screws and oils up joints. Sometimes, she stops her song and gazes up at him expectantly, as if he should know the tune and continue but again and again, she would look back at his hands and continue it herself.
After she finishes on his right, she didn’t hum as she work in his left -arms first. “How is work?” She starts the conversation, her voice languid as if she’s slowing down. Tsukasa resisted the urge to tuck a stray hair that dropped over her eyes, “it’s okay, the clock is well done. Even without frequent maintainance, it could operate just fine” he fidgets with chipped tin on his left pinkie “how about you? Any new invention?”
She laughs, sweet and short and clear as a night sky filled with stars. “Rui had been working non-stop. You should see him when he gets back, the new building had ocuppied his mind for weeks” she sighs “but I haven’t done anything in particular though, if that’s what you’re asking” Tsukasa bit his words, he didn’t mean it like that. Emu turns quiet after that, focusing on his hands more than him. Great, another thing for him to loop in his head with through the night.
She worked in silence until she reaches his fingers, hers grazing silently across his palm. Maybe she’s hoping that he could feel it, the small drawings or the light touches or the soft squeezes but Tsukasa can only watch as she treats his hands with as much care as a real one. It hurts him more that he cannot feel her touch than any experiments Rui had put him through.
As she finishes the routine, Tsukasa flexes his hands to feel it refreshed and easier to move with. Emu cleans the equipment she used with practised ease before turning to him with that longing smile again.
The smile looks sad, as if she’s seeing her dreams right in front of her but unable to touch. As if the world was just one step away but there is this one thin line she cannot cross. And she’s looking at him that way.
dammit Tsukasa, can’t you not mess things up for once?
Emu takes his hand into hers, resting it on her lap as she continues to drag her finger across his palm. Tsukasa assumes that it’s a habit. Maybe the other Tsukasa liked having his hands cradled by hers. He knows for sure that he would’ve.
Testing the waters, he intertwines their hands together, fingers slipping perfectly between each others and for a moment, Tsukasa thought he could feel the warmth of her hand. Emu’s eyes widen, she stares at the interlocked hands before letting it sits quietly on her lap. After a few seconds, she brings it to her chest. And her body shuddered.
Tears begins to fall onto her suit, streams decorates her rose cheeks and Tsukasa’s soul left his body. “Emu…” His mouth opens and closes but nothing comes tumbling out. He only watches as her sobs shook her small frame and as she clutches the tin hand for dear life.
Slowly, he moves over closer to her, his other hand hovering over her head too shy to touch. But eventually, he did as he brings her head to rest on his chest. The very place she seems to enjoy being at the most. She lets go of his hand to hug his waist and the small sobs broke into bigger ones that echoes throughout his entire figure. Every hiccup, shudder, breath, takes turns to hit his soul with full force. Hearing her cry was by far the worse sound he had ever heard. She sounds hurt, and he curses himself for being the reason she is. However, nothing could drag him away from her right now. He will never leave her if she’s crying like this.
“I’m sorry…” Tsukasa holds her close, hand pressing her body closer to him, trying to share the warmth his hands lacked. He could feel her shook her head slightly. “Don’t apologize… please” she says between hiccups “just… can I stay here for a while?”. “Of course. We can stay like this for as long as you need” he rests his head on hers and gently plays with her hair as he rocks her side to side.
It was almost natural, her in his arms, the dragging of his fingers across her scalp, him humming of a tune that kept playing in his dreams. Tsukasa wonders if they’ve done this before -Emu and past him- so many times that their bodies molded to fit each other perfectly. His arms are probably stiff against her but it slotted perfectly between her fingers that he wonders if Rui had known him too.
Or maybe that she memorised his body so much that recreation was possible. That every fingers sized to replicate his old ones so that they could fit hers the same way that it did before. That the feeling to hold her hand was ingrained into his brain so deeply that he could do it without thinking. That the emptyness and the ache in his heart could be soothed by having her as close as possible to it.
That even without memories, he could love her with all of him.