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Hornet has been dreading this day since she was born. The day Hallownest is saved, the day the vessel is sealed, the reason she was born. The day she loses her mother.
Yesterday was a large feast. Her seat was assigned next to her but Hornet spent the whole event in her mother’s lap, being claw-fed as mother conversed with the other bugs who thought they were too good to respect her.
They called her The Beast. She hated when they did that. She knew her mother well and she was far from a Beast. Beasts were savage, unruly. Beasts were cruel and unreasonable. Mother was kindhearted. She was an understanding and intelligent leader.
If anyone was a beast it should be the man taking a mother from her daughter.
Hornet spent the entire day after the feast attached to her mother’s hip. The sling nestled comfortably between the arches of mother’s mask. Anywhere mother went, Hornet went too.
Once it became too late, and the little spider couldn’t keep herself conscious anymore, mother gently handed her off to The Pale Root. And she was carried to bed in The White Palace.
It was a large ceremony. Every Weaver of Deepnest would be there to witness their queen be laid to rest. The princess wasn’t ready for it. She wondered if she ever would be.
She fought being dressed. She fought eating breakfast. She fought climbing atop the private stag. Anything she could do to delay the ceremony. If she fought enough, if she was strong enough, maybe Hallownest wouldn’t need saving.
During the ride, her father and the root converse. The Vessel sits beside father, staring off into the distance. Hornet hears nothing but static as she stares past The Vessel.
A gentle tap reaches her claw and she comes back to reality. The empty vessel stares blankly at her. Hornet stares back.
Father always says that The Vessel isn’t meant to feel. The Vessel isn’t a bug, and it isn’t her sibling. Hornet says that father is stupid.
The stag grumbles as they reach their destination. The Lady takes Hornet’s claw as they walk to the elevator. She has wandered this place since she was born, but today she feels lost.
As the elevator descends, Hornet feels sick. She isn’t ready for this day. She isn’t ready. She isn’t ready.
There are rows of seats around the bed where her mother will die. This is an execution. Mother is innocent. Hornet’s vision is blurry.
Someone gives a speech. Hornet doesn’t hear a word. All she can hear is ringing. A bell tolling for mother. She isn’t ready.
Suddenly, she hears footsteps. Mother enters the room. Hornet turns around quick enough to give herself whiplash.
She wears an ugly blue rag. All of the dreamers do. Something to strip them of personality before stripping them of life.
She thinks that mother deserves to rest in something more elegant than this. She should be wearing red. She should have a delicately crafted silk shawl. She should have trophies of her past. She should not be sent to rest at all.
Every step mother takes, Hornet feels more and more building inside of her. She can’t quite place the emotion, but it made her stomach drop further than it ever had before.
She can’t hold it in anymore when she and mother lock eyes.
“MOTHER-” she screams and The Root is quick to wrap her limbs around the spider to restrain her. Hornet kicks and screams and bites and scratches but she will not be released.
Who does she think she is. This woman is not her mother, and she never will be. She has no right to hold her back. Not from her real mother. Hornet feels rage boil and bubble within her.
In a fit of pure desperation, a storm of thread erupts from her small frame and pushes her out of The White Lady’s grip.
Hornet runs towards mother and throws herself into her arms. She feels mother’s soft fur. Before the sling can think she feels words fall from her mouth.
“Mother I don’t want you to go. I’m weak I’m not ready yet I don’t want you to go I can’t–”
“My daughter you are strong.” It feels as if time has frozen around them. “All will be well. Hallownest needs me-”
“Hallownest can take someone else!”
A moment of thinking as Herrah gives her daughter a pained look.
“My daughter. There is not one thing you cannot do without me. I have seen how you hunt. You are a very strong girl.”
“I cannot live on without you. If you shall sleep I shall die right next to you. I shall pierce my shell with my own two claws and lie in your arms.”
“Those are no thoughts for someone as small as you to have.” Mother gently wipes tears from the sling’s mask,“I used every wish I had for you, my dear. You have the potential for anything you desire. Would it truly be your desire to let my biggest wish lie cold before her first molt?”
Hornet does nothing but cry. She feels weak, but she doesn’t have the time to care. She doesn’t understand why it has to be mother. Why does it have to be mother. Can’t this wretched kingdom crumble around them as she is held in mother’s arms. It isn’t fair. It shouldn’t have to be her.
While hornet is buried into her mother’s fur, she feels movement. The little spider looks up and sees herself handed into The Hive Queen’s arms.
“Oh, dear. Come here, little one.” She says, holding the spider close to her chest.
Hornet feels the softest fur she’s ever known, but she doesn’t care.
“Mother-” she says weakly, reaching out.
Why did it have to be her.
“Hush, my daughter.” Herrah holds their foreheads together for a moment. “I love you. May you always remember that.”
And for the final time, Hornet watches her mother walk away.
She sinks into the welcoming fur and all she can do is weep. Vespa hushes her, petting her head gently.
“Oh, you poor thing.”
Hornet only sinks deeper as she hears the, despite everything, comforting buzzing coming from The Hive Queen’s chest.