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It's been ages since they've had guests of any kind, and now there's two; a friend of Master Eraqus', and the man's own pupil, from what little Terra has been able to understand on the sidelines. It's mostly his age, he tells himself. But maybe there's a bit more to why Master did not want to openly confide in him. It seems Ventus will be staying but after Master Xehanort leaves, there will be space to reveal more.
For dinner they made a simple meal as a household for their guest, fresh bread and fruit tarts, soup made with vegetables foraged from the half-wild growth thriving in patches, grilled fish from the streams, red wine for the occasion. Master Xehanort ate without much comment. The whole time Terra was uncomfortably aware of his gaze that seemed to be always on him when he looked, penetrating right through him.
"It truly seems that Eraqus has made a family for himself in this nostalgic place. Eraqus and I too were as brothers when we stayed here together; I hope the boy will find his place among you just as easily."
"There is no worry of that," Master says warmly, casting his gaze over the heads of his pupils. "Terra and Aqua have been like brother and sister for years. Another 'sibling' might just be the breath of fresh air they need."
"You are quite familiar with them."
"Yes. They're as my own children, too. Terra especially, I have taken care of from an earlier age. He may as well be my own flesh and blood."
Master Xehanort raises his glass to Terra with a smile. "How wholesome."
Terra accepts the titles with a nod and all of the smile he can muster. Soon he will be brother to another, as is the natural way of things when children share a parent. A father. He is his son and glad for it, but---
"Could I trouble you for another serving?" Master Xehanort's voice brings him out of his reverie. "I came straight here after the trouble with Ventus... I am quite famished, and you have become a fine cook with your students to take care of, Eraqus."
Master grins, and for a moment Terra sees the boy he might have been at his own age. "You say that as if it wasn't always so. But yes---have as much as you like. Oh, no need for a guest to serve himself," he continues at the smallest gesture Xehanort makes to rise, and takes his empty plate.
"I'll go too," Terra says, rising also. He does it before really thinking why. At this moment, with these thoughts in his head, he just can't take it. He keeps his head in deference to Master Xehanort so he doesn't have to see what comes over his own Master's face.
There's something he wants to ask, wants to know. It's an indistinct idea in his throat; something that wants to be said but he can't even know what it is, let alone how to voice it. He follows close behind Master's back.
Their regular meals are often scrounged up as quick fixings with only dinner eaten together. Going from dinner hall to the kitchens is a small walk. Should he say something, scrounge himself up too?
Master looks back at him. Smiling, but not that boyish grin. "Was there more you wanted as well, or are you escorting me?"
"Escorting," he replies simply, earning a small laugh.
No one's following. It's just them alone in here, and Terra stands by for a moment, watching as Master Eraqus uncovers the food they'd set aside. "Master—"
"What is it, Terra?"
No one here, but they've never, and they've never, even with no one around. Not outside one of their bedrooms. What does he want? The feeling chews up in him like gristle. Father and son. They are that; he has no one else. But more, too. Aren't they? So why has Master never grinned at him like that?
"Terra." Master says his name like he often does, as father and son, the bare edge of laughter in his voice, almost exasperated. "What has come over you this evening?"
Master Eraqus lifts his arm aside to let him hug him. He knows his warmth, his smell, so well, and the press back of his mustache as he kisses him. It lasts only a second before Master pulls away.
"Terra, you know we can't..."
"Please? Just for a little bit. We'd hear anyone coming."
Filial love and romantic need occupy the same place comfortably in his heart. When Master sighs a little and kisses him again, both swell up brightly. As a son... and more. They might not be able to tell anyone even years from now, but Terra knows. His only concern is if his father knows it, too.
They couldn't go back hand in hand even without the newly fixed up plate. All he can do is keep walking behind him.