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Susie's mind was racing as she wandered the streets of Hometown. They'd faced danger in their adventures before, but the titan. It was something beyond nightmares. She'd never been so afraid before. She'd taken every care not to show it, but... that thing had started to put it in her mind that this wasn't just a fun adventure. Everything was genuinely at stake. Ralsei had said as much before, but she hadn't really taken it that seriously at the time.
A few days ago, she would have welcomed the apocalypse. At least it would have been fun to see everything go to hell. But then, she made friends. The first real friends of her life. And that had changed everything. For the first time in... shit, maybe ever? She wanted to live, and she wanted her friends to live, and she wanted the world to live.
And that fucking prophecy. Despite her bravado in the face of it, despite her words to Ralsei and to Kris, there was doubt in her heart. Those horrible final words hung over her like a sword suspended by a single, fraying thread. She bit her bottom lip, clenched her fists until her claws began to dig into her skin. Doubt and fear be damned, they weren't gonna let that happen. No matter what. She felt her skin begin to break, and relaxed with a huff. The two dorks wouldn't like her hurting herself.
She kicked an empty soda can instead, following it and kicking it down the street, still wet from the rain, reflecting the street lights. A cold gust of wind blew over her, and she shivered, wrapping her arms around herself. She needed to get inside, but where to go? Couldn't go back to Kris', much as she wanted to. Toriel and that idiot skeleton were... yeah, she couldn't go back there. She briefly considered going back to the apartment, but fuck that. That asshole was the last person she wanted to see right now. Then she remembered Castle Town. Ralsei had said he'd wanted it to be a home away from home for her and Kris. She had been to the supply closet earlier in the night after stealing the Darkners' light world forms from the church and throwing them in, but had decided against going in herself at the time, unsure what to do with herself. But now, with nowhere else to go... she briefly hesitated, wondering if she'd really be welcome to just; stay there. But seeing no other options, she walked her way over to the school, which for some reason was never locked. Not really anything worth stealing there, but still weird. Good thing she wasn't gonna have to break in though.
She wandered down the dark corridor. God, I'm the kinda loser that goes to school on purpose now she thought to herself with a chuckle. She reached the supply closet, opened its doors, and stopped a moment to look into the deep, impenetrable darkness. Then she jumped into it, and entered free-fall. The first couple of times she'd done this it had made her stomach lurch, but now it was just kinda fun. Her form began to change, her skin becoming a lighter shade of purple, her clothes transforming from her beat-up old rags into her sick-ass battle outfit.
Finally, she came to a gentle stop at the entrance to Castle Town. It was quiet here too. It was always dark here, but it seemed even the dark world had a concept of night. Nobody was out on the streets, and an aura of sleep seemed to permeate the air. Most strikingly, there was a moon in the sky. There hadn't been any kind of sun during the day, she was pretty sure. And yet, a glowing ball hung in the sky, spilling soft blueish light onto the streets. It wasn't like the Light World's moon, there was barely any detail to it beyond being kinda blue and round. But it was nice.
Walking further, she saw that the cafe was still open. Peeking inside, she saw a few Darkners gathered around a table chatting sleepily over cups of purple tea. It looked warm and relaxed, and for a moment she considered joining them. Her body reminded her of how damn tired she was though, and she decided to just go to bed.
Nearing the castle, she saw Ralsei sat up at the very top of it, faced away from her. His head was tilted upwards to look at the moon. He was completely still. She wanted to go to him, but he looked like he wanted to be alone, and she wasn't exactly sure how to get up there either. Hell, they'd all probably need time to process everything. Ralsei had bore that terrible knowledge alone for a long time, desperately wishing to keep it hidden from her and Kris. And now she knew why, and it made her heart hurt that her friend had been alone for so long with it.
She slipped into the castle's foyer. She decided to make one little stop before bed, and headed upstairs to the jail cell. As she'd suspected, Lancer was fast asleep on his dad's belly, slowly rising and falling with his great snores, reminding her of that one animated movie with a giant fluffy thing she'd seen as a kid. King was a massive dick, no doubt, but it seemed he did... genuinely care about Lancer. And Lancer still cared about him despite everything. So she'd make her best effort to care about him too. Sorta. Maybe. He was still a dick after all. He and Lancer looked peaceful though, so she smiled and silently wished Lancer, who was drooling in his sleep, goodnight.
Reaching her bedroom a few minutes later, she began to open her door, but then stopped and glanced over at Kris', and felt a pang in her heart. She'd see them again tomorrow, but she missed them a lot. Especially after everything that had just happened. She slipped into their room and into their bed. If she couldn't have Kris or Ralsei right now, she'd at least get to sleep somewhere that reminded her of one of them. Her thoughts briefly fell on Ralsei's bare room, and she felt her heart sink. He was everything to her and Kris, but he had no love for himself, which was stupid because he so obviously deserved all the love in the world. She started chiding herself for being a damn hypocrite, but then. Seeing how those two dorks looked at her, how they genuinely cherished her company. She was starting to feel some of that herself. That maybe she was somebody worthy of love. She just hoped she could make Ralsei and Kris feel some of that too, because god Kris may be quiet but they so obviously didn't like theirself either, and it just. Hurt to know. Hurt to know that she was probably part of the reason why. She'd spent so long bullying them, more than anyone else. She'd probably seen something of herself in them, and hated that, and hated them because of that. Guilt threatened to overwhelm her, but she reminded herself that Kris was her friend now, one of her two best friends, and that she could make it up to them for as long as she needed, however she could. They didn't seem to hold it against her anyway, though she didn't know why. Maybe they felt like they deserved it. Fuck, that's horrible. Well, now she was gonna do everything in her power to show them that they mattered so fucking much to her that it hurt. She would make them see their worth somehow, even if it took the rest of her life to do it. However much longer that was. With this thought, she pulled the duvet closer around herself, sank into the dream-soft pillows, and passed into sleep, bathed in the light of that strange moon shining through the window.
She didn't know how much time had passed when a gentle knock at the door roused her. She hadn't dreamed as far as she could remember, which was probably for the best.
“Whozat?” she mumbled sleepily.
“It's just me”, came Ralsei's soft voice. “Would it be alright if I came in?”
“Yeah dude, 'course” she said.
Ralsei stepped into the room holding an ornate teacup and with what looked to be a genuine smile. Susie felt her heart skip a beat at the sight of him. It was so good to see him again, it felt like it had been forever even though it had probably only been a few hours. She smiled back at him, then let loose a mighty yawn like a lion's roar, and stretched her whole body, which let out a series of loud cracks.
“Damn, needed that,” she said.
Ralsei chuckled with a hand over his mouth, a fond look on his face.
“Sounded like it,” he said, before setting the teacup on the bedside table
“Wait, dude, how the hell'd you even know I was here?”
Ralsei blushed.
“I sort of, um, have a sense for when you and Kris are here? I don't fully understand it myself, but I can always tell”
“Heh, weird, but cool.”
Glancing at the teacup, she saw a hot amber liquid in it.
“Oh, just a special tea I came up with” Ralsei said, smiling. “It probably won't give you energy like a drink in the Light World might, but it should warm you up at least.”
“Sick. But you only brought one cup? What about you?”
“I... was going to tell you I already had some, but I promised you I'd be more honest with you. So, I didn't even think to make myself a cup”. He looked away shyly.
“Psh. Dumbass. Looks like we're sharing then.”
“Oh, you really don't have to do that Susie, I made it for you, and-”
“Wasn't asking, now sit.”
She patted the bed, and Ralsei, blushing, nodded his head and sat next to her. Susie picked up the tea and took a sip. It ruled. It tasted like apples and marshmallows.
“Dude, this is awesome, try it.”
She passed the cup into Ralsei's hands, brushing against his soft fur as she did. He really was very soft and fluffy, like what you'd imagine a cloud should feel like. Her mind lingered on that for a moment, though she didn't know why. Ralsei sipped the tea.
“Oh, yum” he said, beaming. “Tastes like blueberries and grapes.”
“Wait, really? That isn't anything like what it tasted like to me.”
“Well, food and drinks in the Dark World can taste different to different people.”
“Guess that makes sense” she said, shrugging.
Ralsei passed the cup back to Susie.
“Oh!” he said, “I came to wake you up so you could get ready for your date with Noelle today”.
Susie, mid-sip, spat tea across the room.
“Oh shit, Noelle! The festival! I totally forgot! How much time do I have?!”
“A while yet” Ralsei said, stifling a laugh, “I made sure to wake you early so you have plenty of time.”
“Okay, cool, cool, thanks” Susie said, breathing a sigh of relief. Then she was hit with another surge of panic. “Oh fuck, Ralsei, I've literally never been on a date before. What if I mess it all up. I like Noelle so much, I really don't wanna fuck this up.”
Ralsei took her hand in his, and she felt warmth spread through her body, accompanied by those familiar green sparkles, and she felt calm wash over her.
“Hm. So that healing works for anxiety too, huh?” she said, feeling herself relax.
“Mm-hm,” Ralsei said, “it's good for whatever ails you. Feeling better?”
“Yeah. Thanks, man.” she said, sighing and resting her back against the wall.
Ralsei only smiled shyly. Then, both of them realised they were still holding hands, and pulled away from each other with an awkward exchange of coughs and sorries. But honestly, Susie hadn't minded. It had been... nice. She put it out of her mind though. She had to get ready. She took another sip of the tea, passed it to Ralsei, then got up and began to pace the room.
“Okay, getting ready. Ready for the festival. Ready for the, uh, date... I don't know what to do Ralsei, help please?”
Ralsei laughed gently.
“Of course Susie. How about I brush your hair?”
She briefly considered saying no. It hardly matched her tough girl image. But then, neither did tea parties, and that hadn't been so bad yesterday. And this was Ralsei. She trusted him.
“Yeah, sure, if... if you wanna I guess?”
“Of course, Susie.”
He reached into the pocket of his robe and pulled out a hairbrush, then patted the bed. Susie sat down.
“Alright, but like, I've probably a got a lot of tangles and shit, so like, don't lose that brush in there” she said, before gently punching his shoulder.
“Ha ha, don't worry Susie, I'll be gentle.”
“Not what I said!” she said, blushing. “But, uh, thanks.”
Ralsei began to work the brush through her hair, and as he'd said, he took it at a gentle pace, slowly working through the knots and tangles with a deft hand. This was nice. Nobody had ever done anything like this for her before. Including her. As Ralsei brushed, they chatted about the day ahead, about the rides, the food, about Noelle, and Kris. Kris... Silently, she wished they were here too. Having a quiet moment with just the three of them would be good. But having it with Ralsei alone was good too. It had been nice spending time alone with him in Cyber City the other day too, and they hadn't had the chance for that since then.
“I only wish I could come with you all,” Ralsei said, sadness in his voice. “I... a lot of me still feels selfish for wanting that. For wishing I could be with you more, for wanting something... something I can never have.”
“Ralsei,” Susie said, heart dropping. “Dude, I really wish you could be in the Light World too. It's not selfish to wanna like, spend time with your friends. But also, you know it doesn't make me and Kris care about you any less right, right? You're our friend, our best friend, and the time we do have together matters so much.”
Ralsei sighed. “I know that, Susie, and I appreciate it very much. You and Kris... the two of you matter so much to me that it hurts my heart. To know that the two of you care so much as well means the world. But it's not only that. I... I don't wish to bring it up, but the prophecy. We may only have... a few days left together, before, before-”
“Hey,” Susie said, taking his hand in hers without even thinking. “Look at me dude.”
He raised his eyes to meet hers, and god, they were such pretty eyes when she stopped to actually look at them. She could feel herself begin to blush, but pushed past it.
“I already told you, we aren't gonna let that happen. Not ever. I know it's scary. I'm scared too. I sure as hell bet Kris is as well. But, think about everything we've managed to do together. Just last night we took down a titan. A goddamn titan. We got this dude.”
Ralsei had put the hairbrush down now. He looked away from her.
“I want to believe that Susie. You have no idea how much I want to believe it. But... I waited my whole life to meet you and Kris. And in all that time I spent alone, I never really thought about myself or who I was. I never realised just how much the two of you would mean to me. And since I've met you, I've finally started to realise things about myself too. To realise I could be a person beyond serving you. For so long, I was resigned to fate. But now, I have the two of you, and I'm beginning to know myself, to know... what I want. But it's all so close, it's casting a shadow on everything. I love you and Kris with all my heart, and it hurts Susie, it hurts so much. Because I know that in a few days, it all might be lost. Just when I realised that I actually want to live, it's almost over.”
Tears began streaming down his face.
“I... I'm so sorry Susie, I shouldn't make you worry about me, it's wrong of me, I know it. I'm...”
He buried his face in his hands and began to sob. Susie felt a wetness on her face and realised she was crying too. She stopped thinking, and just grabbed Ralsei, and pulled him into her arms, holding him tight. He wrapped his arms around her in turn, huddling into her. He was shaking. Shit, she was too. For a long time, they were silent, simply holding each other and sobbing. Susie stroked the fur on the top of his head, raking her claws through it. It was nice. He was so soft.
After a while, they settled into their embrace, and slowly their tears came to a stop. They didn't let go.
“I know how you feel,” Susie said quietly, after a while. “A few days ago, if you'd asked me if I cared if the world ended, I would have laughed in your face. I didn't... have any hope for my future. I didn't care about the world at all. I thought it was all bullshit. But then I met you guys. And everything changed. I actually... give a shit now. About all of it. The two of you, and Noelle. You make me want to live. You give me hope, in spite of everything some stupid prophecy says. I know I can't promise we're gonna make it through, but we're gonna try, we're gonna give it our everything. And if the end comes for us anyway, I'm gonna throw a rude buster in its stupid face and tell it to choke on it first.”
Ralsei burst into laughter.
“Susie... you're really something amazing, you know that?”
She could feel him smiling against her, and she smiled too.
“Pssh, whatever dude” she said with a husky laugh. “You're pretty cool too.”
At long last, they pulled apart, their faces tear stained.
“Shit, when did I get so damn soft?” Susie snorted.
“I think it was always there, deep down under that rough and tough exterior” Ralsei said fondly.
She punched his shoulder again.
“Well, don't go telling everyone about it. I have a reputation to uphold you know.”
“Of course Susie. Your secret's safe with me.”
Their eyes briefly met again, before they looked away from each other bashfully.
“Oh, I haven't finished your hair yet,” Ralsei said, and took the hairbrush up again, resuming his work.
Susie relaxed into it once more, taking up the tea, which was still hot, and took a sip. Outside, she could hear the Darkners starting to wake and go about their day. Distantly she heard Jackenstein's deep voice, talking about making pumpkin cakes. Elsewhere, she heard Rouxls yelling Lancer's name, presumably having been victim to some mischief of his. Kris would probably arrive soon. Susie smiled. Whatever the future held, for just this moment, everything was right with the world.
“Um, Susie?” Ralsei said, voice nervous.
“Yeah?”
“Um. Uh. I think I might be a girl!”
“Oh shit, for real?!”