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Cassie Boodram had been the Ottawa Centaurs’ chief WAG since Ilya Rozanov had replaced the retiring Anton Donaldson as captain of the team. Up to that point, Donaldson’s wife, Audrey had been chief WAG by virtue of her marriage to the captain.
As Ilya didn’t have a wife or a girlfriend, the role fell to Cassie not only because she was married to one of the assistant captains, but because their house had already become ground zero for all team related social events.
Now, the Ottawa captain had a husband, a husband who also played for the team. Cassie knew she could just have a private conversation with the two of them and work out the succession plan, but Cassie wanted to watch the world burn.
So, much like Eris launching the golden apple into an Olympic wedding reception, Cassie tossed “It’s been great being chief WAG for a while, but now that Cap has a husband and that husband has a Cap, I think it’s time for one of them to take on the role. Good luck to whichever of them wants it” into the WAG chat.
“As Cap’s WAG, I’ll go ahead and take that on. Thanks for being there for the team, Cassie.” Shane very reasonably responded.
“As Cap AND WAG, is my job. I will take on.” Ilya wasn’t going to just give in.
The rest of the chat realized this was a conversation much better observed than participated in.
“Cap’s WAG is always the chief WAG. That’s just the way the world works,” Shane insisted.
“Just because it has always been that way, doesn’t mean it always has to be that way,” Ilya countered.
“Who died and made you Grace Hopper?”
“Who?”
“US Navy Rear Admiral. Computing pioneer. That’s who you’re paraphrasing, poorly.”
“I just made that up.”
“You think you did. You didn’t. She did.”
“We are getting off topic, moye razvlecheniye [diversion]. Skills competition?”
“Skills competition.”
And that’s why the next Centaurs practice was attended by most of the WAGs, children were pulled from school and the front office emptied out while Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander went head-to-head to determine the fastest, most accurate and most agile of the two because that’s what you really need in a chief WAG.