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Han had never understood why birthdays needed to be such a production.
It wasn't that he disliked them. He liked cake, he appreciated presents even when he never quite knew how to react to them, and there was something quietly comforting about having the people he cared about gathered in one place. What he disliked was the expectation that he was supposed to become unusually enthusiastic simply because another year had passed, as though reaching a new age required him to stand in the middle of a room while everyone else documented his reaction.
His friends, unfortunately, considered this attitude an invitation to make his birthday as chaotic as possible.
By seven in the evening, his apartment barely resembled the quiet space he usually came home to. Balloons floated beneath the ceiling, bumping occasionally against the light fixture whenever someone walked past the open balcony door. Paper streamers had been taped across the walls and around the bookshelves, and a large HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAN banner hung crookedly above the television, one end already beginning to sag.
The dining table had disappeared beneath plates of food, half-open presents, cups, napkins, and three separate cakes that Han was fairly certain nobody had actually needed.
He stared at them.
"Why are there three cakes?"
Jeongwoo, who was eating pizza directly from the serving plate despite there being perfectly good plates beside him, glanced over.
"One is chocolate, one is strawberry, and the third one is because I forgot which flavor you actually like, so I figured having an extra cake would make my failure less obvious, and honestly, I think I've done a fairly good job of making it look intentional."
Han stared at him for several seconds.
"You forgot my favorite cake flavor, and somehow your solution was to buy enough cake that I wouldn't notice you forgot?"
"I remembered that you like cake, which I think should count for something considering how many people forget birthdays entirely."
"That is an extremely low standard for friendship, and I'm honestly disappointed that you're presenting it as though you've done something impressive."
"It worked, though, because you're still standing here talking to me instead of throwing me out, so I'd say my strategy has been successful."
Han sighed, but he couldn't stop himself from smiling.
"You're lucky I like you, because otherwise I would absolutely make you take all three cakes home with you."
Jeongwoo grinned.
"I've been relying on that for years."
Across the room, Steven and Woongki were arguing over the music, with Steven insisting that the birthday boy should have the final say while Woongki pointed out that Han had already rejected six songs and therefore clearly couldn't be trusted with the playlist. Juwon was trying to keep Daisuke from eating frosting directly from the cake, while JL documented the entire disaster on his phone. Chihen sat on the arm of the sofa wearing a ridiculous paper crown someone had placed on his head earlier, apparently deciding that it was beneath his dignity but not beneath his ability to tolerate.
Han looked around at all of them.
The apartment was too warm, too noisy, and considerably more crowded than he preferred, but the sight of everyone laughing together made something in his chest settle.
He was happy.
Then the front door opened.
Han looked up automatically.
Shuaibo walked inside carrying a small gift bag.
Han noticed him before anyone else did.
He always did.
Shuaibo's hair was slightly windblown from outside, and there was a faint flush across his cheeks from the cold. He spotted Han almost immediately, and the smile that appeared on his face was softer than the one he'd been wearing when he greeted everyone else.
Han felt his own expression change in response.
"You're late."
Shuaibo laughed as he approached.
"I know, and before you start complaining, I had to stop by my place because I forgot to wrap your present, which is apparently more difficult than I expected when you have the wrapping skills of a five-year old."
Han glanced at the small bag that was in Shuaibo's hands.
Shuaibo smiled. “I think you’ll really like it.”
“I probably will. I’ve liked everything you’ve gotten me before, even that Spiderman hoodie you got me for Christmas that one year.”
Shuaibo laughed. “Especially the hoodie.”
Shuaibo leaned in to give him a tight hug. Afterwards, for a second, they simply looked at each other.
Then someone called Shuaibo from across the room, and the moment disappeared.
Han didn't think anything of it.
Not yet.
He had always known that Shuaibo was an affectionate person.
That was the reason so many of the small things he did never struck Han as particularly suspicious. Shuaibo remembered everyone's favorite foods, noticed when people were uncomfortable, and had an irritating habit of taking care of people before they realized they needed help.
Han simply happened to receive more of that attention because they were best friends.
So when Shuaibo brought Han his favorite drink without asking, Han barely noticed.
When he noticed Han's plate was empty and returned with more food, Han thanked him.
When Han complained about being cold and Shuaibo immediately took off his own jacket, Han protested that Shuaibo would get cold.
"I'll survive, and honestly, I'd rather spend the rest of the evening uncomfortable than watch you pretend you're not freezing, and plus it's your birthday so please stop arguing with me and just wear the jacket."
Han rolled his eyes.
"You're being dramatic. You're acting like I'm about to freeze to death when I'm literally standing inside my own apartment."
"I know you're not going to freeze to death, Han, but you're shivering, and I can fix the problem in five seconds by giving you my jacket. I don't understand why you're determined to make this more complicated than it needs to be."
Han smirked.
"You're very bossy today."
Shuaibo smiled back at him.
"Only because you're worse."
~~~
Han liked being taken care of by Shuaibo.
That was hardly new.
At one point, Han's hands became cold from standing near the open balcony door, and Shuaibo noticed before he did. He caught Han's fingers between both of his palms and began rubbing them gently.
"Your hands are freezing, and before you say anything, yes, I know you're going to tell me that you'll live, but I'm still not going to let you turn into ice just because you don't want anyone fussing over you."
Han glanced down at their hands before looking back up at Shuaibo.
“You’ve been taking really good care of me tonight.”
Shuaibo’s expression softened, though a hint of embarrassment crossed his face.
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Han smiled. “You’ve been fussing over me all evening.”
Shuaibo stared at him for a moment before looking away, his ears turning slightly pink.
“Right, because apparently I’ve been making that pretty obvious.”
Han didn’t notice the way Woongki nearly choked on his drink across the room.
He certainly didn’t notice Steven quietly turning away so he wouldn’t laugh.
~~~
Later, once the party had settled into smaller conversations, Steven turned toward Shuaibo with the kind of expression that immediately made Han suspicious.
“So, are you seeing anyone right now, or are you still pretending you're too busy for a relationship because admitting you'd like someone would apparently be too much for you?”
Shuaibo laughed awkwardly.
“No, I'm not seeing anyone, and before you start making assumptions, I'm perfectly happy on my own.”
Steven raised an eyebrow.
“Fine. Then is there anyone you're interested in?”
Shuaibo hesitated.
Han wasn't paying much attention until he noticed the pause. He glanced over just as Shuaibo looked directly at him.
Their eyes met for barely a second.
Shuaibo looked away.
“Yes,” he said quietly.
Han's stomach tightened.
He lowered his gaze to his drink, turning the glass slowly between his fingers.
Steven noticed the exchange immediately.
His eyebrows shot up.
“Oh, that kind of yes.”
Shuaibo looked at him nervously.
“What does that mean?”
“It means you just looked at Han before answering me, and now you're suddenly turning red, so I'm going to assume there's a reason for that.”
Shuaibo nearly choked on his drink.
“I wasn't—”
“You absolutely were,” Steven said, grinning. “I'm not saying anything yet, but this just became much more interesting.”
Han looked between them.
“What are you two talking about?”
“Nothing,” Shuaibo said quickly.
Steven smiled innocently.
“Exactly. Nothing at all.”
Han narrowed his eyes.
Steven turned back to Shuaibo.
“So, who is it?”
Shuaibo's ears turned pink.
“I haven't told anyone.”
Steven leaned back, looking delighted.
“Seriously? You've been carrying around a secret crush and thought you could get away without anyone noticing?”
Shuaibo groaned.
“Please don't make this worse.”
“I haven't even started.”
“Steven.”
“Fine, fine. I'll behave.”
He paused.
“Probably.”
Shuaibo gave him a look.
Steven laughed.
“So it's serious?”
“I think so.”
“And you're not going to tell us?”
“Not yet.”
Steven nodded thoughtfully.
“Okay, I'll respect that. But just so we're clear, if this person happens to be sitting in this apartment right now, I am going to be extremely entertained when they eventually figure it out.”
Han looked up.
Shuaibo immediately looked away.
Steven's grin widened.
Han frowned.
“Why are you looking at him like that?”
Steven shrugged.
“No reason.”
“That was very obviously a reason.”
“I know.”
Han shook his head and tried to return to his drink, but the conversation had already lodged itself firmly in his mind.
There was someone in Shuaibo's life that he apparently liked.
They may even be in this very apartment.
And the more Han thought about it, the less comfortable he felt.
Steven, apparently determined to make matters worse, glanced between them again.
“Does Han know?”
Han looked up.
Shuaibo looked at him.
For a moment, neither of them said anything.
“No,” Shuaibo finally answered.
Steven's eyebrows rose.
“Wow. You're really keeping him in the dark.”
Han forced a small smile.
"Well, you don't have to tell me until you're ready, and I'm not going to pressure you just because I'm curious."
Shuaibo's expression softened.
"I know, and that's one of the reasons I'm so grateful to have you as a friend."
Han's fingers tightened slightly around his glass at that word.
Friend.
His heart gave an odd little jump, and he quickly looked away.
Steven noticed.
Of course he noticed.
But this time, he only smiled to himself.
“Interesting,” he murmured.
Han looked back at him.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
Steven took a sip of his drink, looking far too pleased with himself.
“Absolutely nothing.”
Han nodded.
Then he looked away.
He hated how much the conversation had gotten under his skin.
~~~
The feeling only became worse as the evening went on.
Han tried not to pay attention to it.
He focused on his friends. He helped Juwon retrieve Daisuke from the kitchen after Daisuke had attempted to eat frosting directly from the serving knife. He argued with Woongki about the music. He listened to Chihen tell an increasingly ridiculous story about something that had happened earlier that week.
But somehow, Han kept noticing Shuaibo.
Whenever Shuaibo laughed from across the room, Han's attention drifted toward him. When Shuaibo checked his phone, Han caught himself wondering who had messaged him. And when the word spread about Shuaibo's mysterious crush, Han found himself listening a little too closely.
It was getting ridiculous.
Then Shuaibo smiled at something on his phone, and that familiar knot tightened in Han's chest. Han immediately looked away.
He hated that reaction.
He had no claim over Shuaibo, and he certainly had no right to care who he liked. Yet the thought of someone else becoming the person Shuaibo turned to first made something inside him ache.
Han had never realized how much he had come to rely on the little things that made Shuaibo his best friend: knowing where he would sit, what he would order, which songs he skipped, and the slight change in his voice when he was tired. Han knew the exact smile Shuaibo wore when he was genuinely happy.
Somewhere along the way, Han had started taking that closeness for granted.
Now, for the first time, he wondered what would happen if someone else became the person Shuaibo shared all of that with.
The thought unsettled him more than he wanted to admit.
Not because he wanted to control Shuaibo.
Because he suddenly wasn't sure he could imagine his life without the particular closeness they had always shared.
Eventually, Han caught Shuaibo looking at him again.
“What?”
Shuaibo blinked. “What?”
“You've been staring at me all evening, so either you're trying to tell me something or you've suddenly become fascinated by my face.”
Shuaibo laughed nervously. “I was just thinking.”
“About?”
He hesitated.
“You.”
Han's heart gave an odd little jump, which he immediately ignored.
“That sounds slightly creepy, considering how nervous you've been acting.”
“I know.”
Han studied him, but the teasing faded when he noticed how genuinely nervous Shuaibo looked.
“Are you sure you're okay?”
Shuaibo nodded. “I'm okay. I just need to talk to you later.”
“About what?”
“I'll tell you after the party.”
Han frowned.
“You're being suspicious.”
“I know.”
Han laughed quietly.
“Fine, but you've made me curious now, so I'm expecting an explanation later.”
Shuaibo smiled nervously.
“I know.”
Shuaibo smiled, though there was still a hint of nervousness behind it.
~~~
As the night wore on, the apartment grew quieter, the initial bustle of the birthday celebration fading into the background as everyone settled into their own conversations. Amid the softer atmosphere, Shuaibo quietly excused himself and headed toward the balcony. Han's eyes followed him without really meaning to, but he watched as Shuaibo stepped outside and quietly spoke with Jeongwoo.
He couldn't make out what they were saying, but whatever Jeongwoo said seemed to make Shuaibo even more nervous. When Shuaibo finally came back inside, his cheeks were noticeably pink.
Han raised an eyebrow.
“What was that about?”
“Nothing,” Shuaibo said a little too quickly.
Han stared at him.
“Nothing?”
Shuaibo nodded.
“Definitely nothing.”
"You're terrible at lying, especially when you're already nervous."
Shuaibo smiled awkwardly.
"I know."
Han stared at him.
~~~
Something was definitely happening.
He just couldn't figure out what.
Eventually, the birthday cake(s) came out.
Everyone crowded around Han while the candles flickered in the dim room. Han looked around at the people surrounding him. For all the complaints he had made about the decorations, the noise, the ridiculous amount of cake, and his friends' complete inability to behave themselves, he couldn't deny how grateful he was to have them there.
He closed his eyes and made a wish.
I wish the people here would stay in my life forever.
For a moment, he smiled to himself.
Then another wish quietly crossed his mind.
I wish Shuaibo would stay with me forever.
When Han opened his eyes, Shuaibo was looking directly at him from across the table.
Han smiled.
For a brief moment, the strange knot that had been sitting in his stomach all evening disappeared, leaving behind only the warmth of the candles and the familiar comfort of Shuaibo's gaze.
Han leaned forward and blew out the candles.
Everyone immediately cheered.
Daisuke clapped enthusiastically before looking at Han with sudden concern.
“Wait, that's it? You only made one wish? You should make another one because I don't think one birthday wish is enough.”
Han laughed.
“I only get one, and besides, if I start making multiple wishes, I'm pretty sure that's cheating.”
Daisuke frowned.
“That isn't fair. You should get at least two wishes on your birthday.”
“Life isn't fair, Daisuke,” Han said with a grin. “Might as well start getting used to it now.”
Juwon laughed.
“That's a terrible lesson to teach him on your birthday.”
Han shrugged, reaching for a slice of cake.
“Somebody has to.”
Shuaibo appeared beside him with a napkin.
"You've got frosting on your face."
"Where?"
"Right here, and don't move."
Shuaibo gently wiped it away with his thumb.
For a second, they were standing very close.
Han noticed the warmth of Shuaibo's hand and the brief way his eyes dropped toward Han's mouth.
Han's heart skipped.
For a brief second, he wondered if there was something more behind the gesture, especially after everything that had happened that evening. The mysterious person Shuaibo had admitted to liking, the nervousness that had followed him around all night, and the way Shuaibo had looked at Han when Steven asked who he was interested in suddenly came rushing back to him.
Han immediately pushed the thought away.
No. He was probably reading too much into it.
Shuaibo was affectionate with him all the time, and there was probably a perfectly ordinary explanation for this too. Maybe he was just checking whether he'd gotten all the frosting.
“Thanks,” Han said, offering him a small smile.
Shuaibo nodded, his own smile a little too nervous.
“You're welcome.”
Han walked away, apparently satisfied with his explanation.
Chihen watched him go, then slowly turned toward JL with an expression of complete disbelief.
“Did he really just do that?”
JL sighed, already looking exhausted on Shuaibo's behalf.
“He did.”
"Do you think he realized that Shuaibo used his thumb to wipe his face even though he was holding a napkin?
"Oh he definitely didn't."
JL rolled his eyes at the two of them.
“How does he not realize what is happening?”
Chihen smiled faintly.
“Because Han is apparently committed to being oblivious to anything related to romance.”
Chihen glanced toward Shuaibo, who was still watching Han from across the room.
“You know, at this point, I almost feel sorry for him.”
JL nodded.
“Almost.”
Chihen laughed quietly.
“Han really has no idea.”
“Not even a little,” JL agreed.
~~~
Eventually, the party began winding down.
People collected coats and leftovers. Steven stole a slice of chocolate cake for the road. Woongki tried to steal another and was caught. Chihen finally removed the paper crown from his head. Juwon dragged Daisuke toward the door while Daisuke argued that the birthday cake should belong to whoever could reach it first.
Jeongwoo was one of the last people getting ready to leave. Before stepping into the hallway, he paused and looked back at Han with an amused but knowing expression.
“Don't stay up too late tonight, you always tell everyone you're going to bed and then somehow manage to stay awake for another three hours.”
Han rolled his eyes.
“I won't. You don't have to worry about me.”
Jeongwoo nodded, then glanced briefly toward Shuaibo, who was standing nearby with the gift bag still in his hand.
“Good luck.”
Han frowned.
“With what?”
Jeongwoo stared at him for a moment, clearly debating what to say next.
“Nothing,” he finally said, forcing an innocent smile. “Just... happy birthday.”
Before Han could question him again, Jeongwoo stepped into the hallway and left the room.
Han stood there for a moment, staring at the now empty space with narrowed eyes.
“That was weird.”
Behind him, Shuaibo laughed nervously.
“Yeah.”
Han turned toward him.
“You know what he meant, don't you?”
Shuaibo's smile immediately became suspiciously innocent.
“Absolutely not.”
Han stared at him.
“You're both terrible liars.”
Shuaibo laughed softly.
“I know.”
The apartment became quiet.
The sudden silence felt almost strange after hours of music and conversation.
Han looked around at the aftermath of the party: balloons drifting beneath the ceiling, wrapping paper scattered across the floor, half-empty glasses on the table, and three cakes sitting beneath the warm kitchen lights.
Shuaibo was still there.
Han smiled.
“You're staying?”
“If that's okay,” Shuaibo said, giving him a small, nervous smile. “I know it's getting late and everyone else is halfway through the door, but there's still something I need to tell you, and I don't think I'll be able to sleep tonight if I leave without saying it.”
Han's expression softened.
“Of course you can stay. Spend the night if you want. Although, now that you've said that, I'm definitely not letting you leave until you tell me what you've been so nervous about all evening.”
Shuaibo let out a quiet laugh.
“I was afraid you were going to say that.”
Han smiled and stepped aside.
“Come on, then.”
Shuaibo reached down and picked up the gift bag he'd carefully kept beside him all evening.
“I still haven't given you your present.”
Han glanced at the bag and laughed softly.
“You've been carrying that around with you since you got here.”
“I know.”
“So what exactly have you been waiting for?”
“The right moment.”
Han studied him for a moment, his curiosity growing.
“You've been saying that since you walked through the door.”
“I know,” Shuaibo admitted, looking slightly embarrassed.
Han's smile softened.
“Then let's stop waiting and make this the right moment.”
He led Shuaibo toward the balcony.
The night air was cold against Han's skin.
Below them, the city stretched into the distance, its streets lined with moving headlights and its buildings filled with thousands of warm windows. The sounds of the party disappeared behind the glass door, leaving only the distant hum of traffic and the occasional voice rising from the street below.
Han leaned against the railing.
Shuaibo stood beside him.
For several moments, neither spoke.
Then Shuaibo held out the gift.
Han opened it.
Inside was a dark leather bracelet with a tiny silver star attached to it.
Han smiled immediately.
"This is beautiful."
"I thought you'd like it, and I know you don't usually wear much jewelry, so I tried to find something simple enough that you wouldn't feel like I was making you wear something just because I wanted you to."
Han looked up.
"You remembered that?"
"I remember a lot of things about you."
Han's heart fluttered.
"I can tell."
Shuaibo took the bracelet from him.
"Can I put it on you?"
Han held out his wrist.
"Sure."
Shuaibo fastened it carefully, his fingers lingering briefly against Han's skin.
Han looked at the bracelet.
Then at Shuaibo.
“Thank you. I love it, and I'm actually going to wear it, so you don't get to spend the next month quietly wondering whether I secretly hated it or whether I was just pretending to like it because it's my birthday.”
Shuaibo smiled nervously.
“I wasn't going to spend a month worrying about that.”
Han raised an eyebrow.
“You absolutely were.”
Shuaibo hesitated before giving him a sheepish smile.
“Maybe I would have worried about it a little bit.”
Han laughed, shaking his head.
“You're ridiculous.”
“I just wanted you to like it.”
“I do,” Han assured him, glancing down at the bracelet again. “I really do.”
For a moment, Shuaibo smiled.
Then something in his expression changed.
The small smile faded, and a flicker of uncertainty crossed his face. His eyes dropped toward the floor, and the nervousness that Han had noticed throughout the entire evening suddenly seemed much heavier.
Han's own smile faded.
He reached out and gently touched Shuaibo's arm.
“Hey... what's wrong? You look like there’s something on your mind again.”
Shuaibo looked at him.
"Nothing."
"That's the same lie you've been telling me all night, and you're even worse at it now."
Shuaibo took a breath.
"There's something else."
Han waited.
Shuaibo's hands were trembling slightly.
Han's expression softened.
"Hey, you don't have to look so nervous. Whatever it is, you can tell me, and whatever you're worried I'm going to say, I promise I'll listen before I react."
Shuaibo gave a small laugh.
"That's easy for you to say."
"Why?"
"Because you're not the one who has to say it."
Han waited.
Shuaibo looked down at his hands.
"I've been trying to tell you for a really long time, and every time I think I'm finally going to say it, I convince myself that maybe I should leave things alone because you're too important to me to risk losing."
Han's chest tightened.
"Shuaibo..."
"I know I probably should have said something sooner, but I didn't know how to tell you without making you feel like you owed me an answer, and I definitely didn't want to put you in that position on your birthday."
Han stayed silent.
Shuaibo finally looked at him.
"I'm in love you."
Han froze.
The words landed softly.
But they changed everything.
Han stared at him.
Shuaibo swallowed.
"I've been in love with you for a long time. I don't know when exactly it happened, but you're the person I look for first whenever I walk into a room and the person I want to tell everything to. I can't seem to stop thinking about you no matter how hard I try, and trust me I’ve tried." Shuaibo paused to take a breath "I know that probably sounds like too much. I didn’t want to overwhelm you on your birthday and maybe I've waited too long to say it, but I couldn't keep pretending that what I feel for you is just friendship when it hasn't felt like that to me for a very long time."
Han's eyes began to burn.
He blinked.
Once.
Twice.
A tear slipped down his cheek.
Han stared at it.
For several seconds, he looked genuinely offended by his own face.
Then he laughed in disbelief.
"Oh, you've got to be kidding me."
Shuaibo's expression went immediately from nervous to terrified.
"Han?"
Han touched his cheek.
Another tear appeared.
"This is so embarrassing."
“Are you crying?”
“No.”
Shuaibo stared.
A third tear slipped down Han's cheek.
Han sighed.
“Apparently I am.”
Shuaibo looked terrified.
"Are you upset? Because if I made you uncomfortable I swear that wasn't what I wanted and you don't have to answer me right now you can take as much time as you need because I knew this was a risk but I just had to tell you before I lose you to someone else and I—"
"Stop."
Shuaibo stopped speaking.
Han wiped his cheek.
"I'm not upset."
"But you're crying."
"I think we’ve already established that."
"Then why would you be crying if you weren't upset?"
Han laughed helplessly.
"Because I'm happy."
Shuaibo froze.
Han wiped his cheek with the heel of his hand.
“I am extremely happy, actually. So happy that my body has apparently decided to respond by completely humiliating me in front of the person I have spent the last several months trying to keep my cool around.”
Shuaibo stared at him.
"What do you mean by that?"
"I think you know."
Shuaibo stared at him with a confused and worried look on his face.
"I'm sorry but I really don't
Another tear slipped down Han's cheek.
He sighed.
"I don't even know what's wrong with me. I never cry at things like this."
Shuaibo smiled uncertainly.
"So...your crying is a good thing?"
"Why yes captain obvious, these are happy tears."
That made Shuaibo laugh softly.
Han looked at him.
Despite the tears, his expression softened.
"I'm happy, Shuaibo. Really happy."
"Okay that's good," Shuaibo's smile faded slightly "but..."
Han noticed immediately.
"But what?"
"How do you actually feel? Because I just thought maybe you didn't feel the same, and I know you don't owe me anything, but I was afraid that after I told you, you might need some distance from me because you'd feel like I had changed our friendship without asking you first."
Han stared at him.
"Why would you think I would want distance from you?"
"Because I didn't know what else you would do."
“Shuaibo, you've been my best friend for years. You could probably tell me you had committed some terrible crime, and after I cover up whatever it is that you did, I'd still be sitting right here telling you that you're not getting rid of me that easily.”
Shuaibo blinked.
“That's... actually a little concerning.”
Han gave him an unimpressed look.
“Can you please stop ruining the sentimental moment? I'm trying to be reassuring here.”
Shuaibo laughed softly, but his expression soon softened again.
“I was scared,” he admitted quietly. “I kept thinking that once I told you how I really felt, you might look at me differently, and I don't think I was ready to find out what that would mean for us.”
Han's expression softened.
“So was I.”
Shuaibo blinked, clearly surprised by the answer.
Han took a small step toward him.
Almost instinctively, Shuaibo took half a step backward.
Han noticed immediately.
“Don't.”
Shuaibo stopped.
Han studied him for a moment before stepping closer again.
“Why are you backing away from me?”
“I don't know,” Shuaibo admitted, his voice quieter now. “I think I'm just nervous, and part of me still can't believe you're actually standing here telling me that you might feel the same way.”
Han reached for his hand.
“Then stop backing away from me. You don't have to be afraid of me, especially not now.”
He reached up and took Shuaibo's face gently between both hands.
Shuaibo froze.
Han's thumbs brushed beneath his eyes.
"You don't get to confess that you love me and then decide to back away from me because I'm crying. If anything, you're going to have to get used to this because apparently you've made me so happy that I can't even keep myself together anymore."
Shuaibo laughed shakily.
"I started panicking. I didn't know what to do when you started crying."
"You could have stayed right where you were instead of looking like you were preparing to change your name and flee the country."
"I thought maybe I'd made you uncomfortable."
"You didn't."
Han's voice softened.
"You made me realize something else entirely."
"What?"
Han sighed.
"That I was jealous."
Shuaibo blinked.
"When you told me earlier that you were interested in someone, I kept telling myself that I was fine with it because you're allowed to like whoever you want, and obviously I want you to be happy, but the more I thought about you giving someone else all the attention you give me, the more upset I became."
Shuaibo stared at him.
Han laughed quietly.
"I kept imagining you waiting for someone else's messages, bringing someone else their favorite drink, remembering little things about them, looking at them the way you've always looked at me, and I hated the idea so much that I spent half of my own birthday trying to convince myself that I wasn't jealous."
Shuaibo's face slowly turned red.
“So you were jealous because you thought I liked someone else?”
“Yes,” Han admitted, looking slightly embarrassed by the confession now that he had to say it aloud. “I tried very hard to convince myself that I wasn't, but apparently I wasn't as convincing as I thought I was.”
Shuaibo let out a quiet laugh.
“And you really didn't realize that the reason you were jealous was because you were in love with me?”
Han gave him an incredulous look.
“Obviously not. If I had realized that, do you really think I would have spent half the night internally panicking every time you looked at someone?” Han exasperated "I even panicked a little when I saw you talking to Jeongwoo earlier!"
Shuaibo laughed again, shaking his head.
“I spent the entire night trying to work up enough courage to tell you that I loved you, while you were apparently spending the entire night worrying that I was going to fall in love with Jeongwoo or somebody else.”
Han sighed and rubbed a hand over his face.
“When you say it like that, it sounds incredibly stupid.”
Shuaibo smiled.
“It was a little.”
Han lowered his hand and gave him a pointed glare.
“You're acting very confident right now for someone who was shaking so badly when you gave me this bracelet.”
Shuaibo's smile widened.
“I've had a very emotional evening.”
“You're lucky I'm happy.”
“I know.”
Han looked at him for a moment, then smiled despite himself.
“And you're lucky you're cute.”
Shuaibo's eyes widened.
Han blinked.
There was a brief silence.
“I said that out loud, didn't I?”
“Yes,” Shuaibo said, trying and failing to hide his smile. “You definitely said that out loud.”
Han looked away.
“Forget it.”
“I don't think I can, even if I wanted to.”
Han laughed softly, shaking his head.
Then his expression softened as he looked back at Shuaibo.
“I love you too.”
Shuaibo's smile slowly disappeared, his eyes widening as he stared at Han as though he was afraid he'd misunderstood what he'd just heard.
“What?”
Han let out a soft, disbelieving laugh, another tear slipping down his cheek.
“I said I love you too, you idiot.”
Shuaibo just stared at him.
Then his expression broke into the brightest, most relieved smile Han had ever seen.
“You really mean it?”
Han smiled through his tears.
“Of course I do. How many times do I have to say it before you finally believe me?”
Shuaibo stared at him for another moment before his expression slowly softened into the happiest smile Han had seen all night.
“You really love me.”
Han stepped closer.
"I really do. I think I've probably loved you for longer than I realized, but I never let myself consider it because you were too important to me, and I was terrified that if I got it wrong, I could ruin the one relationship in my life I could never imagine losing."
Shuaibo's eyes softened.
Han reached up and held his face between both hands.
"Come here."
Shuaibo obeyed.
Han pulled Shauibo closer to him and connected their lips in a deep kiss.
There was nothing tentative about it.
Even with tears still clinging to his eyelashes, Han was completely certain now, one hand resting against Shuaibo's cheek while the other curled gently into the front of his jacket.
Shuaibo froze for half a second before finally kissing him back.
When Han pulled away, Shuaibo looked completely stunned.
Han smiled.
"What?"
"You kissed me."
"Yes."
"You were crying."
Han laughed.
"I can multitask, apparently."
Shuaibo laughed too, still looking like he couldn't quite believe what had happened.
Han leaned forward and kissed his forehead.
"I've wanted to do that for longer than I realized."
Shuaibo looked down, suddenly shy again.
Han smiled.
"Look at me."
Shuaibo slowly looked up.
Han wiped away the last tear from his own cheek.
"You're really nervous now aren’t you?"
"I've been in love with you for a long time, and now you're standing here telling me that you love me too, so I think I'm pretty sure I'm allowed to be nervous."
Han laughed.
"That's fair."
Shuaibo smiled.
"I was so scared."
"I know."
"I thought I was going to lose you."
"You could never lose me, even if you tried to."
Han's voice was firm.
“You are not losing me, and now you don't have to spend another second wondering if I'm going to disappear just because you finally told me the truth.”
Shuaibo nodded, his expression softening as some of the tension finally left his shoulders.
Han brushed his thumb gently over Shuaibo's cheek, watching the way his face relaxed beneath the touch.
“Besides,” Han added, his mouth curving into a small smile, “it's my birthday.”
Shuaibo blinked.
He laughed softly. “What does that have to do with anything?”
“I think getting my best friend to confess that he loves me is a pretty good birthday present, especially considering how long it took you to actually say it.”
Shuaibo's face immediately turned red again.
Han's smile widened.
“There it is.”
Shuaibo looked away. “What?”
“That blush.”
“You keep pointing it out.”
“Because it's cute, and apparently now that you've confessed, I get to say things like that without pretending I'm not thinking about them.”
Shuaibo groaned softly and covered part of his face with his free hand.
“You're making this worse.”
“I'm definintly not.”
“You are.”
Han laughed.
“I spent the entire evening thinking you were nervous because you liked someone else, and now I find out you were nervous because you liked me, so I think I'm allowed to enjoy being right tonight.”
“You weren't right about anything,” Shuaibo pointed out.
Han paused.
“Yeah I guess that's true.”
Shuaibo laughed again.
Han gently tugged his hand away from his face.
“Stop hiding.”
“I'm embarrassed.”
“You were brave enough to confess your undying love to me, but you're embarrassed because I called you cute?”
“Maybe?”
Han smiled.
“You are impossible.”
“And you're enjoying this far too much.”
“Maybe I am.”
Shuaibo shook his head, but the smile on his face made it clear he wasn't actually annoyed.
Han leaned a little closer, his expression turning teasing.
“And just so we're clear, you're actually in love with me.”
Shuaibo's face somehow managed to turn even redder.
“I can't believe we're having this conversation.”
Han smiled. “Why? It's a pretty important detail.”
“Because you enjoy watching me get embarrassed.”
“Maybe a little.”
Shuaibo gave him an exasperated look, though the corners of his mouth were still lifted.
“You're enjoying this way too much.”
“I've spent years watching you act all cool and relaxed, so forgive me for enjoying the fact that you're finally flustered.”
Shuaibo laughed softly and shook his head.
“I really am in love with you.”
Han's expression softened.
“I know.”
“And you're never going to let me forget that I admitted it like this, are you?”
“Absolutely not,” Han said, smiling. “I intend to remind you for the rest of our lives.”
Shuaibo sighed dramatically.
“I've made a terrible mistake.”
“You told me you loved me on my birthday.”
“I know.”
“And now you're stuck with me.”
Shuaibo smiled.
“I think I can live with that.”
Han leaned in and kissed him again.
This time, the kiss was shorter and softer, accompanied by the quiet laugh that escaped Shuaibo against his lips when Han smiled into it.
When they pulled apart, Han was still smiling.
“Happy birthday to me.”
Shuaibo laughed.
“Very modest.”
“Modesty is my middle name.”
“Is it now?”
Han laughed “That's between me and God.”
Shuaibo looked down and squeezed his hand.
“Just so you know I'm keeping you now.”
Han's smile softened.
“I wasn't planning on going anywhere.”
Shuaibo rested his forehead against Han's.
Too busy being distracted by each other, neither of them seemed to notice the faint sounds coming from inside.
Unfortunately, the kitchen contained seven people who had absolutely no business still being there.
~~~
Daisuke had been the first to stay.
He had been halfway through putting his shoes on when he had looked at the balcony door and saw Shuaibo's nervous expression “Why does Shuaibo look like he just ate some bad Mexican food?”
Jeongwoo had immediately said, “Because he's probably nervous about something. Come on, let's give them privacy.”
Nobody moved.
The balcony door had been left slightly open, and the voices carried clearly enough for everyone in the kitchen to hear what was happening.
There was silence.
Then Han started crying.
Then Shuaibo said something about loving him.
And after that, everyone who was standing outside made their way back inside, collectively deciding that leaving would somehow be rude because they were now far too emotionally invested in what was happening.
So they remained clustered near the kitchen like the world's least subtle group of spies.
Chihen leaned closer and whispered, “Did he just kiss him, or am I imagining things? My contacts are drying out.”
Woongki whispered back, “No, he definitely kissed him, and honestly, I think that’s the quickest I have ever seen Han move in my life.”
“I knew it,” Chihen whispered triumphantly.
“You said Shuaibo was going to chicken out before he confessed.”
“I was wrong, and I'm perfectly willing to admit that when I'm this happy about being wrong.”
Juwon covered his mouth to hide a laugh as he watched them.
Steven shook his head, trying not to smile.
“This is officially the most entertaining birthday party our friend group has ever had.”
Jeongwoo sighed quietly.
“I tried to get you all to leave, but apparently nobody here has any clue on what the word ‘privacy’ means.”
“You did try,” JL whispered, glancing around at everyone.
“We just chose not to listen to you.”
Daisuke frowned thoughtfully as he looked toward the balcony.
“They're together now right? Because they were best friends before, but they were acting kind of strange tonight, so I think that's probably what happened outside.”
Nobody answered him.
Daisuke waited patiently for several seconds before looking around at the group.
“Well, if none of you are going to answer me, can I at least have some more cake while we're watching them?”
Everyone slowly turned toward him.
Daisuke blinked at them.
“What?” he whispered innocently.
The apartment went completely quiet.
While they were silently whispering to each other what they failed to notice was that Han and Shuaibo had both come inside and were both watching them with amused looks in their eyes.
The seven people who absolutely were not supposed to still be there suddenly froze in their spots, caught in the middle of their extremely questionable attempt at pretending they hadn't been listening.
Han stared at them.
They stared back.
For several long seconds, nobody said a word.
Han's eyes narrowed as he slowly looked from one guilty face to the next.
“How long have you all been standing there?”
Jeongwoo immediately pointed toward everyone else, looking far too eager to defend himself.
“I told them to leave, and I tried to give you two some privacy.”
Han raised an eyebrow.
“You were standing here too.”
“I was trying to supervise.”
“You were eavesdropping.”
Jeongwoo hesitated for a second before offering a weak smile.
“I was accidentally eavesdropping, which is completely different and sounds much less embarrassing when you say it that way.”
“There is no such thing as accidental eavesdropping when you've been standing in the same place for ten minutes.”
Han folded his arms and looked between them, his expression becoming increasingly suspicious as everyone suddenly seemed fascinated by the floor.
Woongki was the first one brave—or foolish—enough to break the silence.
“So... happy birthday?”
Han's expression went completely blank.
“You were listening.”
Woongki immediately shook his head.
“No, absolutely not. I was simply standing here when you happened to say several things that I definitely wasn't supposed to hear.”
Han stared at him.
“Woongki.”
“Okay, fine. We were listening, but in my defense, I didn't originally plan to, you two started having the most important conversation of the year directly beside an open balcony door and suddenly my shoes were filled with cement!"
“Jeongwoo, how much of that did you all actually hear?”
Jeongwoo let out a long, resigned sigh before answering.
“Not the entire conversation, if that's what you're worried about, but... enough that I think you probably shouldn't ask us for specifics unless you really want to make this even more embarrassing for yourself.”
Han stared at him.
“That is not reassuring.”
“I know,” Jeongwoo admitted. “I was trying to make it sound better.”
“It definitely didn't.”
“Yeah, I figured that out halfway through saying it.”
Everyone went completely silent for a few long seconds, before chaos erupted.
Chihen immediately burst out laughing.
Jeongwoo covered his face.
Steven looked deeply amused.
Juwon and JL were both trying not to laugh.
Daisuke simply looked between Han and Shuaibo with open curiosity.
Han closed his eyes.
"This is so humiliating."
Chihen laughed harder.
"Honestly, the funniest part was you being jealous all night because you thought Shuaibo liked someone else."
"Yeah, you even thought he liked me which is crazy!" Jeongwoo looked at Shuaibo "No offense."
"None taken."
Han opened his eyes.
"Can we never discuss that again?"
"Nope," Woongki said immediately, grinning. "That was probably the best part of the entire evening, I would have never imagined you being so jealous over someone who didn't exist."
Han pointed at him.
“You're banned from my next birthday, I'm going to need a very strict guest list and your name won't be on it.”
“You can't ban me from your own birthday?!”
“Watch me.”
“You invited me this year, though, so clearly I haven't been that terrible.”
“And now I'm seriously reconsidering whether inviting you was a mistake in the first place.”
“You say that now, but you'll miss me when I'm not there.”
“I'll miss the peace and quiet considerably more.”
Daisuke raised his hand.
“Can I still come?”
Han looked at him.
Daisuke smiled hopefully.
Han sighed.
“Yes Daisuke, you can come.”
Daisuke immediately brightened, then looked between Han and Shuaibo for a moment, his expression thoughtful as though he were putting together something that had seemed obvious to everyone else for a very long time.
“So... does this mean you two are together now?” he asked sincerely. “Because honestly, that makes sense. You already act like you're always supposed to be together, and at this point, you're basically my parents anyways.”
Shuaibo's face turned bright red.
Han stared at Daisuke for a long moment.
“Your parents?”
Daisuke nodded as though there was nothing strange about his conclusion.
“Yeah. You're always together. You and Shuaibo keep feeding me whenever I come over, and whenever something happens, I usually end up with both of you, so I don't really see how this is different.”
Shuaibo covered his face.
Han looked at him, then back at Daisuke.
“I don't know whether I should be flattered or concerned.”
Daisuke shrugged.
“You can be both.”
Shuaibo's face turned an unmistakable shade of bright red, and he suddenly seemed very interested in looking anywhere except at the group.
Han, however, simply glanced at Shuaibo, smiled, and reached over to take his hand as though there was nothing embarrassing about the question at all.
“Yeah, we're together,” Han answered calmly. “I guess we probably should have figured that out a little sooner, considering how obvious it apparently was to everyone.”
Daisuke nodded slowly, looking completely satisfied with the explanation.
“Okay, that makes sense. I was wondering when you two were finally going to figure it out, even Kenshin my best friend knows and he's only met you both like twice I think.”
Juwon smiled and shook his head fondly.
“I think we're all just really happy for you two, especially after watching you spend so much time dancing around your feelings without actually saying anything.”
JL nodded in agreement, folding his arms with an amused smile.
“Honestly, I was starting to wonder if we were going to have to wait until your next birthday for you two to figure it out.”
Steven laughed.
"You really took your time, considering how obvious you were to everyone else."
Han groaned.
"I don't want commentary about how stupidly oblivious I was, because I already have enough to deal with knowing I spent half the night jealous of someone who didn't exist and Jeongwoo of all people."
"Hey!" Jeongwoo exclaimed
Chihen grinned.
"That sentence alone is going to keep me entertained for years."
Han pointed toward the door.
"Everyone out."
Woongki laughed.
"You're kicking us out?"
"Yes."
"On your birthday?"
"Especially on my birthday, inviting all of you into my home was not supposed to end in me being emotionally exposed in front of an audience."
Everyone laughed as they slowly began leaving again.
Daisuke stopped at the door.
"Can I still have cake?"
Han looked at him.
"Yes, you can still have cake, because unlike everyone else here, at least you have the decency to ask before stealing it."
Daisuke smiled.
"Okay."
He picked up the three to-go containers filled with cake.
"By the way, I'm really happy for you two." Daisuke smiled at them "Mom and Dad are finally together."
Then he left.
Both Han and Shuaibo stared at the closed door in front of them.
"So which one of us is the Mom?"
Shuaibo laughed and dragged Han away from the door.
For the first time that evening, the apartment fell completely silent.
Han lead Shuaibo to the couch sitting the both of them down, letting out a quiet breath before looking over at Shuaibo, who still seemed slightly overwhelmed by everything that had happened.
“What?”
“Nothing,” Shuaibo said softly. “I was just looking at you.”
Han smiled.
“You're staring again.”
“Well there's no problem with that. Now that I don't have to hide it anymore, I don't really see a reason to stop.”
Han's cheeks warmed, but he walked over anyway and took Shuaibo's hand.
“Come here.”
Shuaibo shifted closer, and Han intertwined their fingers before resting his head against his shoulder.
He was still embarrassed, still overwhelmed, and still wiping away the dried tear tracks that painted his face, but he was smiling.
His eyes drifted down to the small silver star on his wrist.
“You know,” Han murmured, “I think this might be the best birthday present I've ever gotten.”
Shuaibo smiled.
“The bracelet?”
Han shook his head.
“No. You.”
Shuaibo squeezed his hand.
Han squeezed back.
For years, Han had thought that birthday's didn't need to be a whole spectacle, but sitting here on his birthday with Shuaibo beside him, he realized that sometimes the biggest spectacles are the ones hidden in the words spoken.
He only needed to know who he wanted beside him for whatever came next.
And as Shuaibo rested his head against Han's, Han smiled softly.
Maybe he didn't need to make that second birthday wish after all.
His wish had already come true.