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After Izuku’s panic attack, it hadn’t taken long for Shouta to warm up to the idea of Katsuki being a more consistent presence in Izuku’s life. In the month following All Might’s timely departure from UA, Katsuki and Izuku had been stuck together like gum to a sidewalk on a hot summer's day. It seemed as though Katsuki’s ‘protect Izuku’ setting had been turned up to 100 and had yet to be dialed down again.
It was tricky considering the blonde seemed to be relatively calm when it came to Izuku’s physical well being. In their hero training, he appeared to have no doubt that Izuku could handle himself in a battle. The shorter boy had certainly made an impression once he finally got his hands on his weapons. The entire class, while hesitant to attack at full force at first, quickly realized Izuku was not someone they should be going easy on. Their faces the first time Izuku had taken out 3 training dummies blindfolded with his throwing knives was something Shouta would be cackling at for decades to come.
Katsuki, to his own credit, had only held back once. The very first time they were paired up to spar. It was clear from the moment they both set foot on the mat that the explosive blonde was nervous about attacking Izuku. It only took about 20 seconds for Izuku to get Katsuki on his ass and right in his face. “Stop fucking around Kacchan. You told me I was your equal. Fight me like it.” Izuku snarled down at him.
The fight following those words had been mesmerizing. Despite their time apart, Izuku still knew everything about Katsuki’s fighting style. And Katsuki was quick to absorb Izuku’s. The spar ended in a draw after a straight 10 minutes of the two of them dancing around each other and laughing like they were having the time of their lives. Any trepidation Katsuki may have had about hurting Izuku had been thoroughly appeased fairly quickly.
So yes, despite Katsuki’s confidence in Izuku’s ability to kick ass without any help from him, his worries about his childhood friend’s emotional and mental wellbeing were still a bit touch and go. Anyone in the know could see he had not fully forgiven himself yet for the role he played in Izuku’s suicide attempt, and was determined to make sure the freckled boy he cherished so much never fell that low again; Whether is was his fault or not.
Each morning, Izuku was greeted by Katsuki with a fist bump, or a hug if he was feeling extra affectionate, and a steaming cup of tea. Izuku actually preferred coffee, but he appreciated the gesture so much he simply didn’t have the heart to tell Katsuki that small detail.Then throughout the day, Katsuki went out of his way to check in with Izuku about how he was feeling.
“How are you feeling today, nerd?”
“Has anyone been giving you shit? You let me know if they do and I will blow their asses up!”
“You seem tired. Did you sleep okay last night? You gotta make sure you’re sleeping so you can show everyone what you’re made of!”
Shouta, for his part, found the whole thing wildly amusing. And to Izuku’s credit, he seemed to like having Katsuki’s attention. However, his overprotectiveness had begun to visibly grate on the green haired boy. Izuku had confided in him nights before, asking for advice on what he could do to placate Kasuki’s worries. It wasn’t that he wasn’t touched by how much Katsuki cared, but he wanted to show the blonde that he wasn’t going to fall apart at the smallest issue. Both Hizashi and himself had suggested that he simply talk to Katsuki, explain how he was feeling, and reassure him that he really was doing better.
So that weekend, Izuku invited Katsuki over to their home for the first time since their family dinner all those weeks ago, while Shouta and Hizashi stepped out for a day of running the errands they had been putting off for the last 5 months.
Izuku seemed rather nervous to have the other boy over considering they hadn’t exactly spent time together outside of school since they were children. The talk was one thing, but what would they do afterwards? It's not like they were still 4 years old and could spend hours playing pretend with their hero figures like before. Getting lost in their own little world as they imagined what it would be like to grow up and become the greatest heroes of all time. A team that would surpass even All Might himself, although that clearly wasn’t as difficult as they once thought considering how lackluster the hero turned out to be.
Izuku was broken from his thoughts by a knock at the front door. He jolted forward and hurriedly opened the door, meeting the ruby gaze of his friend as the wind swept past them both in its comforting breeze and entered the house. Katsuki stood in simple jeans and a black tank top, a red bomber jacket over top that was slightly pushed up to the elbows; accentuating the taught muscles of his forearms where they nervously crossed over his chest.
“Can I come in or are we just going to stand here like this all day?” Katsuki spoke suddenly, his voice gruff with false frustration to cover the obvious nervousness he felt. Izuku startled suddenly, realizing how long he had been standing in the doorway, simply staring at the blonde boy. Feeling like a creep, Izuku coughed awkwardly to clear his throat and pulled the door open fully for Katsuki to enter.
“Sorry Kacchan, I was just stuck in my head for a second there.” Izuku replied as he watched Katsuki remove his shoes and change into the guest slippers laid out for him. “How has your day been so far?” He asked.
Katsuki stuffed his hands into his pockets as he gazed around the entrance of the house again, not really noticing any notable differences from the last time he was here. “It’s been fine, I guess. Did some homework and went for a run. How about you? Are you feeling okay today?” He asked, his eyes finally moving to Izuku to look him over; Searching for anything that may be amiss with the greenette.
Izuku sighed lightly, running a hand through his curls to settle his nerves. “I’m fine Kacchan. That’s actually something I wanted to talk to you about.”
Katsuki’s eyes immediately widened in a small show of panic as he replied quickly. “Huh? Did I do something wrong? I didn’t mean to-”
“No no! Kacchan nothing like that!” Izuku quickly reassured, watching as the other boy seemed to calm only slightly at his words. “You’ve been great! Honestly, sometimes I can’t believe how much you’ve changed. Not in a bad way or anything! It’s amazing how far you’ve come!”
Katsuki’s eyes widened at those last words, a swell of emotion clogging his throat at Izuku’s genuine praise in his progress. After all, it was only a couple months ago he thought he’d never have the chance to show Izuku how much he’d done to change his ways and atone for his actions.
He was brought back as Izuku continued to ramble.
“You’ve been so caring, and I love all the time we get to spend together now. I don’t want that to change. But maybe you can dial back the protectiveness just a little bit?” Izuku said, pulling on his fingers in a nervous habit he’d developed sometime in the last 2 years.
“What do you mean?” Katsuki asked.
“I just mean that I'm okay. I know seeing me panic like that was probably really scary for you, but I'm not going to fall apart again at the slightest inconvenience. All Might saying those things really hurt me, and I won’t lie, they still do. He was my hero for so long and it crushed me to have someone I idolized so deeply say such hurtful things about me. But I’m in therapy. I have two amazing dads who love me and take care of me. I have my best friend back and he told the #1 hero to go screw himself just to stand up for me! I’m doing so much better than I ever have before! And yeah, I still have bad days and enough trauma to sink the goddamn titanic, but I really am okay. You just…don’t have to worry so much. Okay?”
Katsuki stood silently as he absorbed Izuku’s words. He was correct that his panic attack had scared him, and maybe Katsuki had been too over protective recently. He just couldn’t seem to calm his worries. He was so terrified that one wrong move would bring Izuku right back to the edge of that building and he would lose him all over again.
Izuku was healthier now. He was at a healthy weight. The bags that sank under his eyes in middle school had reduced significantly and he did carry himself as a much more confident and happy person in comparison to before.
But even so, Katsuki’s mind always flashed back to middle school. A time full of burnt skin and even more scalding words. He still saw the broken eyes of a boy desperately hanging onto anything to keep himself afloat in a world that was determined to drown him in any way possible.
“I just…I don’t want you to get hurt. I can’t lose you…” The ‘again’ was left unspoken as Katsuki tapered off. Katsuki had made a promise to himself 2 years ago to become the hero Izuku deserved. How could he be that though if he couldn’t even protect the one person that mattered the most.
Izuku’s lips upturned slightly in a sympathetic smile. He understood the other boy’s worries, he really did. And it touched him deeply that Katsuki cared so much.
“I can’t promise you that bad things won’t happen again. This life we’ve chosen for ourselves is going to be full of unfair things. Good people get hurt. Bad people get away. There are going to be plenty of people who don’t think I can be a hero just because I don’t have powers.” Izuku stressed, moving closer to his friend and lightly gripping his hand in his. “I will get hurt again Kacchan, that's life. But I will be okay, because I’ll have you with me.”
The two teenagers stood silently as the words spoken lingered in the air around them. Izuku held Katsuki’s hand in his own, a physical way to communicate ‘I’m here. I will always be here.’
Katsuki seemed to grip onto that as tightly as he could, holding Izuku’s hand back firmly as he fought the tears threatening to escape him.
“Ok.” Katsuki finally spoke, a small cough leaving him as he tried to clear the emotion out of his voice. “I’ll back off a little. Just…promise me that the next time you aren’t okay, you’ll tell me?”
“I promise, Kacchan.”
It felt completely natural as Izuku pulled Katsuki into a hug, his chin resting comfortably on the other boy's strong shoulder while his hands wrapped around his waist. Katsuki tensed for a moment before soon relaxing into the embrace, leaning his head against Izuku’s. A comfortable silence surrounded the two as they allowed themselves to enjoy the feeling of being close to one another. The sun shone through the windows and illuminated the room in a calming light. Right now there was nothing to worry about. How could anything hurt either of them when they were holding each other so close?
The moment was broken however by a loud yowl from Obi, the cat sitting next to his food bowl impatiently. It seemed the white cat couldn’t care less about their bonding when his stomach was empty.
Izuku pulled away from the hug with a small giggle, turning his attention to the small feline. “Really? I fed you like an hour ago!” He laughed as he made his way over to the cupboard where the cat food was kept. “I'll give you a little, but don’t tell Papa, okay”? Izuku poured a small portion of food into Obi’s bowl, the cat immediately moving forward to chow down, now uncaring of whatever was happening around him.
Rolling his eyes fondly, Izuku turned back to his guest who still stood in the living room, silently watching the interaction with rapt attention. “Sorry about that, he can be really impatient.” Izuku said as he rejoined Katsuki.
“It’s okay.” Katsuki whispered softly, a gleam in his eyes that Izuku couldn’t identify. Suddenly the blonde coughed into his fist, his head turning to the side as a flush covered his cheeks. However, he spoke before Izuku could question it. “So, what do you wanna do?”
Izuku startled, his hands coming to cover his face as he began to mutter. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry Kacchan! I’m so rude! I didn’t even offer you a drink or anything and you’ve just been standing here for like 10 minutes! You can sit if you want, I'll go get you some water!”
Katsuki caught Izuku’s wrist as he turned to run to the kitchen, halting the boy in his tracks. “Nerd, it's fine. You’re not being rude. Calm down.”.
Taking a deep breath, Izuku’s shoulders dropped as he relaxed again. “Sorry. I guess I’m just a little nervous. This is the first time we’ve hung out in years”.
Katsuki’s lips quirked up into a small smile, knowing the other boy had been just as nervous about today as he had been. “What do you normally do for fun around here?”
“Well, I usually train or work on my analysis when I'm bored, but dad told me that he didn’t want me training without either him or papa home, and I don’t think you’d have much fun just sitting and listening to me mumble for hours.”
That was false. Katsuki could sit and watch paint dry as long as Izuku was there.
“We could play some video games if you want?” Izuku said softly, looking up to the blonde for approval.
“I’d be down for video games.” Katsuki shrugged, moving to take a seat on the plush couch in front of the television.
“Great!” Izuku smiled as he quickly went to set up the console.
*****
Izuku had forgotten how loud playing video games with Katsuki could be. He was genuinely nervous about getting a noise complaint from a neighbor with how rowdy the two of them were starting to become.
That’s not to say he wasn’t having fun. In fact, Izuku couldn’t remember the last time he’d had this much fun with a friend.
The two of them were laughing and shoving each other. Playful insults were being thrown left and right and both of them were grinning so wide it was starting to hurt.
Izuku playfully shoved his socked foot into Katsuki’s face in an attempt to sabotage him, causing the other boy to bark out a disgusted laugh and shove Izuku’s leg away.
“Get your stinky fucking foot out of my face nerd, I’m about to win this thing!” Katsuki yelled as he clutched his controller harder. The two of them were currently neck and neck in a fierce Mario Kart competition, and this round was going to be the tie breaker.
Izuku laughed too, narrowing his eyes as the graphics declaring their final lap overtook the screen.
Narrowed eyes met for a moment before they both boosted their characters forward, using every trick they had to get ahead. For a moment it looked as though they would tie, when at the last moment Katsuki’s character was sent flying into the air and Izuku’s went soaring past the finish line. A few more NPC’s crossed too before Katsuki’s character settled again and he finished the race in 7th place.
Katsuki sat there shocked as he slowly turned to look at Izuku, the boy now on his feet and dancing happily as he basked in the glory of his victory.
“Did you just fucking blue shell me?” Katsuki said murderously, his teeth gritted as he gripped his controller so hard he worried he might break it.
Izuku stopped his dancing and met Katsuki’s glare with his own playful smirk, his arms crossing defiantly as he settled his weight onto one hip. “All’s fair in war, Kacchan. Don’t be a sore loser.” He snarked.
“Why you little-” Katsuki yelled as he tackled Izuku onto the couch. A shocked laugh left Izuku’s mouth as he hit the cushion. The two of them grappled around, hands clenched together as they pushed against one another in a fierce battle.
A swipe here, a shove there. A push and a pull.
A loud thud echoed through the house as the two of them rolled off the couch and crashed to the floor. Neither really seemed to notice as they laughed and fought against each other. The rug underneath rumpling beneath them as they tumbled across the floor in a fierce battle.
“Give up nerd, you know I always come out on top” Katsuki playfully snarled at Izuku from where he was currently pushing against the other boy's hands from above.
Beneath him, Izuku pushed against their clenched hands and smirked. Katsuki’s eyes widened when in one swift movement, Izuku threw his hips up and his legs around to flip him onto his back. Using the blonde’s surprise against him, he quickly reversed their roles. “Maybe you're not as great as you think you are Kacchan” Izuku quipped back.
It only took a moment for Katsuki to let go of his initial surprise and smile sharply. With his teeth bared and before Izuku could react, Katsuki sat up and sharply threw Izuku onto his back.
The smaller boy huffed out a breath as the wind was slightly knocked out of him, his back hitting the floor with a sharp sting. This is the moment Katsuki used to fully pin Izuku on the ground. Taking advantage of their clasped hands, he held them firmly over Izuku’s head as he used his legs to tangle with the other boys, ensuring his victory and immobilizing his opponent fully.
"Yes I am." Katsuki growled out with finality, gazing down at the green haired boy beneath him.
For a moment, neither spoke. Faces were red and the air was thick as the two of them panted through their excursion. Hot breaths crossed between them and no one dared to move an inch. Slowly, Katsuki’s hands relaxed where they’d been gripping tightly and his posture bleeding the rigid tension it had been holding. Two sets of eyes stared into each other with emotions neither was truly able to or ready to articulate.
Katsuki stared down at the freckled boy beneath him and, still catching his breath, just allowed himself the luxury of absorbing Izuku’s presence here for a moment. Green curls disheveled and face flushed, a bead of sweat slowly trailing down his pale temple. More than that though, Izuku laid pinned under him though no longer restrained, and still chose to stay exactly where he was. Katsuki could feel it now; Finally, there was trust growing again and he could cry with how elated that fact alone made him feel.
“Kacchan?” Izuku asked softly, as though afraid to pierce the gentle veil of the moment they had created.
Izuku looked up at Bakugou with wide and inquisitive eyes. Kacchan was a puzzle that Izuku had not yet managed to solve, but he could tell he was getting closer. Day by day and brick by brick. The blonde had changed so much in what was in all honesty, a very short amount of time in the grand scheme of things. Some days it still felt too good to be true that this is who Bakugou was now. How could anyone look at him with such affection after using those very same eyes to gaze at him with disdain only a few years ago.
“Yeah?” Bakugou replied softly.
“What was it about thinking I was gone…that triggered such a change in you?” Izuku asked, his head tilting slightly to the side.
Bakugou paused, his eyebrows raising in surprise as he absorbed the unexpected question. Slowly, he released Izuku’s hands and sat back up onto his heels. The other boy took the opportunity to sit up as well, crossing his legs and waiting patiently for an answer.
He didn’t mind waiting, it was a very loaded question after all, and Kacchan had always needed a moment or two longer to sort through his own emotions than others might. Despite all the bravado, he was actually quite reserved. Izuku would wait as long as Kacchan needed.
Bakugou took a deep breath. “You were always there. For as long as I can remember.” He started. His hands shook as he looked down at the understanding eyes of his friend. Even Katsuki himself hadn’t fully been able to understand or put into words why losing Izuku had done to him what it had. Why it had rearranged him so completely.
He clenched his eyes shut, trying to find the words he’d been searching for. “Even when things were so bad between us, You were still there; Cheering for me louder than anyone else. Believing in me more than anyone else.”
He’d never been able to understand why Izuku’s loyalty had been so unwavering. How was it possible for someone to be pummeled down so many times and still stand up again to cheer their aggressor on. Maybe a part of Bakugou had unconsciously gotten more cruel on purpose, trying to push the boundaries and see just how far he could take things before Izuku finally gave up on him. It just hadn’t happened. Even he still can’t understand it.
“Even then when I imagined my future, climbing the rankings and finally becoming the #1 hero;” He paused for a moment, a humorless laugh escaping his mouth. “You were right there. Still believing in me.” Bakugou could feel his voice becoming thicker with emotions as he tried to articulate a sentiment that was far too complicated to fit into just a few sentences. “I guess when I thought that that future was gone. And that it was all my fault. I don’t know, it just put a lot into perspective.”
For a moment, neither boy spoke. Just sat in the weight of it all for a moment and let it settle. Katsuki anxiously picked at his cuticles, a nasty habit he hadn’t quite been able to curb.
“Pretty selfish, I know.” Katsuki muttered, avoiding the other boy's gaze.
“Not at all.” Izuku replied immediately.
Bakugou looked up sharply, red eyes meeting understanding green.
“Kacchan, the last few months with you have really had me thinking about everything. And more than anything I think it's forced me to evaluate how differently the two of us were treated.” Izuku began, his voice steady and sure.
Bakugou took an opportunity to settle fully on the ground, the two of them now sat facing each other on the carpet.
“I can understand why you felt the way you did when you thought I was gone. You might think that it was selfish but be realistic Kacchan; neither of us had any actual friends. There was so much pressure on you to be the strongest; and you know just as well as I do that the other kids at school were shitty enough that if they ever felt you weren’t they’d have left you in a moment.”
Bakugou had to admire this new Izuku who just told it like it was. He had long since understood all of this. Katsuki was popular because he was strong, not because anyone actually liked him.
“I thought I’d lost the only person who’d ever cared about me because of who I was; not my quirk. And that I had no one to blame for that bleak looking future without them but myself.” Katsuki concluded the thought.
Gently, Izuku placed his hand supportively on Bakugou’s arm. “If you think a little thing like dying would keep me from being the loudest person cheering for you when you become #1, you’d have had a rude awakening when you heard me calling your name from heaven.”
Katsuki laughed sharply and smacked Izuku’s hand softly. “Don’t joke about that. You’re not going anywhere ya hear me nerd.”
Izuku laughed softly with him. There was a companionable silence shared between them, a new layer of their new and growing friendship formed. Every day Izuku shocked Katsuki with his willingness to forgive him and move forward anew after all that he’d done. He couldn't decide whether it was kindness or naivety that led to the decision on Izuku’s part.
He still had so many questions. Things he struggled to mention out of fear of driving the other boy away. Despite this, a part of him knew they couldn't have the close knit bond he truly craved if he didn't understand this new Izuku to his core.
“Can I ask you something too?” Katsuki asked tentatively.
“Of course.” Izuku replied immediately.
“What was it like being homeless?”
Izuku froze for a moment at the question, his eyes fading as his mind instantly took him somewhere else. Instantly Katsuki regretted even opening his mouth.
“Nevermind, you don’t have to answer that! I shouldn’t have asked!” Katsuki hastily scrambled out.
“No. It’s fine. I want to tell you.” Izuku cut him off. His eyes were back, now looking at Bakugou firmly and determined. “It’s just…Are you sure you want to know? It’s not great.”
Bakugou stood his ground. He was determined to be someone safe for Izuku. Even if whatever it was was hard to hear, he would be a pillar of support.
“You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to. But I am curious. I’m sure it sucked and I sure as shit didn’t make it easier for you. The least I can do is be a supportive ear right?” Katsuki said surely.
A small smile quirked on Izuku’s face at his response. “Okay.” He replied softly.
It took Izuku a moment to gather his thoughts. There was a lot to tell and he wasn’t sure where exactly he wanted to start. How deep into all of it did he want to go right now. How much could he handle? He’d spoken with Hound Dog about everything endlessly and he’d made a lot of progress.
Still, it was a difficult subject to broach even on the best of days.
Izuku took a deep breath. “Things went south pretty fast after mom died.” He began. “An officer came to the apartment to tell me what had happened and to stay with me until a social worker arrived. He was really nice at first, until he noticed my shoes.”
Katsuki winced at that, he could imagine what that realization might have looked like and how crushing it must have been to Izuku on what was definitely the worst day of his life.
“His eyes went really cold all of a sudden, and he pretended to get a phone call so he could leave. He didn’t even try. His phone screen was still black.” Izuku laughed humorlessly. “I’m sure he did make a call though because the social worker never showed up. I waited 2 days before I went to the police station to ask for help. They dismissed me, told me they’d send someone eventually.”
Katuski knew they hadn’t even begun yet and already his blood was boiling. He was just a kid and he needed help. God if he ever met any of those damn cops he was going to blast their faces into next week.
Izuku coughed sharply, clearing his throat before continuing. “Anyways, uh by the end of the week there was a for lease sign on the door of the apartment and the locks had been changed. I got lucky and one of the maintenance guys was willing to open it up for me so I could grab some stuff before I left. Just some essentials ya know?”
Izuku cried some nights. Remembering everything he left behind in that apartment. Things that were probably just thrown out once new tenants were secured. So many photos and treasured memories that he’d been forced to abandon. Sometimes he wept just thinking of specific photos of his mom and him that he’d grown up passing by in the hallway, photos he’d never lay his eyes on again.
“Mom had some money tucked away for an emergency that I grabbed. It was enough to get me by for a little while as long as I was frugal. I bought a water bottle that I’d refill anywhere I could, and I’d eat lunch at school so I only really had to worry about food on the weekends.”
Katsuki could see Izuku was falling back into the memories as he recounted them. It was a painful clarity to understand now that all those times he’d mocked Izuku for “Being even scrawnier than usual” It was because he was actively starving.
“I learned pretty quickly where it was safe for me to sleep and where it wasn't. The homeless community is very territorial; you do not want to see what happens when you encroach on someone else's space.” Izuku shuddered at the memories of some of his close calls during those early days and the scars he carried for it now.
“I found the most success in alleyways and on the roofs of abandoned buildings. If nothing else it was nice to see the stars every night before I went to sleep.”
Leave it to Izuku to put any kind of positive spin on this.
“So it wasn’t great but I was figuring it out. And…” He suddenly trailed off. His demeanor suddenly went dark. It sent a shiver through Katsuki.
“And?” He prompted quietly. “You can stop if you want to”
“No.” Izuku replied immediately. “No, I want to tell you. It’s just..it’s not easy to talk about.”
“Take your time.” Katsuki nodded supportively.
With a deep breath Izuku continued. He could do this.
“The money ran out. And school let out for the summer.” Izuku said quietly.
A pit formed in Katsuki’s stomach at the implications of what had just been said. This was about to get so much worse than he’d ever imagined.
“Fuck.” He breathed out. Izuku huffed out a soft laugh and shook his head in grim amusement. “Yeah. So I was out of money and down a meal ticket.” Izuku spoke again jadedly. “I got desperate really quick.”
“At first I tried dumpster diving, but the cops and store owners kept catching me and chasing me away.” Izuku began. “Then I resorted to stealing from the 100 yen store or 7/11. It worked for a while until they caught me and I was nearly arrested.”
A bead of sweat trailed down Izuku’s temple, this retelling definitely taking its toll on him. Katsuki wanted so badly to reach out for him, but something told him that was probably the worst thing he could do at this moment.
“Then one night when I was really starving, I tried to pickpocket his rich looking business guy walking down the street.”
The pit grew bigger.
“He saw me and he caught me. Said he was gonna call the police and have me thrown in jail. I started crying and apologizing, and kept repeating how hungry I was.” Izuku’s voice grew tight and angry. His posture curled and rigid as he continued to talk.
“Then he told me he wouldn’t call the police. He’d even give me enough money to feed me until school was back in session. I just had to do something for him.” Izuku choked out the last few words.
His arms wrapped around himself and nails dug desperately into the flesh of his arms. Green brows furrowed as his brain replayed that night over and over. God he could just puke thinking about it.
Slowly, Katsuki reached out with shaky hands until he made contact with Izuku. The other boy flinched back sharply, wide eyes shooting up to look at Bakugou's concerned gaze. Very gently, Katsuki pried Izuku’s hands off of his own arms. 10 crescent shaped indents bloomed from where the nails had nearly pierced freckled skin.
“Izuku?” Katsuki asked no more than a whisper.
“He made me use my mouth on him, Kacchan.” Izuku choked out, almost gagging on the words themselves.
Instantly Katsuki felt his entire body alight with pure unfiltered rage. In less than an instant, Katsuki was angrier than he’d ever been in his entire life. This wasn’t his usual fury, loud and bright and explosive. This was a very quiet, concentrated, and seething wrath that was burning a war path in his chest.
His body moved without really thinking, just a sudden need to hold the other boy close and to feel that he was there. Katsuki surged forward and pulled Izuku into his arms.
Instantly, Izuku curled himself into Katsuki’s embrace. His tears finally broke free and the green haired boy cried loudly into the other's shoulder. Katuski’s arms wrapped tighter and more protectively around his friend, a tear or two even leaking out of his own eyes and he listened to Izuku’s broken wailing.
Somehow, someway, Katsuki would track down that son of a bitch. And when he found him, he was going to wish Katsuki had just killed him.
After a while Izuku’s sobs died down. His cheek nesseled into the blonde’s shoulder and his hands clutched the fabric of his jacket. Katsuki sat dutifully still for as long as he needed to, his own fingers carding gently through green curls as his nails soothingly scratched against the other boy’s scalp.
Eventually, Izuku pulled away and wiped his nose on his own sleeve. He wiped his tears away and sat back on his heels.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to lose it like that.” Izuku said quietly. His voice was still thick with his tears as he sniffed to clear the last of his emotional outburst away.
“It’s okay.” Katsuki said “Izuku please tell me that guy is in jail. That somehow he didn’t get away with this.”
Izuku tried to smile gently, the way a parent does when they're about to deliver bad news but they want to soften the blow. Unfortunately for him it came out as more of a grimace. “No. He’s not. Dad tried to find him but I didn’t exactly have any information to provide so the trail went dead pretty fast.”
God Katsuki needed to blow something up after this.
“What about after school was back in session?” Katsuki asked. The underlying question clear without having to be spoken out loud. ‘Did it happen again?’
“I ate at school, and used whatever spare change I found around campus or could swipe from someone’s backpack to eat on the weekends. Most of the time though I just tried to eat as much as I could on Friday and hope it held me over until Monday.” Izuku replied.
Katsuki let out a small huff of relief that at the very least Izuku hadn’t been forced to endure that trauma more than the one time. His lips quirked upward slightly and he raised his eyebrow at the freckled boy. “You never took money from my backpack, did you?” He asked.
Izuku smirked up at him, his own brows raising slyly. “I had to get back at you somehow.” He replied playfully. Katsuki huffed out a laugh at that reply.
“Good. I wish I’d known then what was happening, but I honestly can’t say how I would have responded back then being who I was at the time. At the very least you needed that change way more than I did. I'm glad to know my wallet did something for you even when I didn’t.” Katsuki said gently, His thumb coming up to wipe the last of Izuku’s tears away.
Izuku leaned tenderly into the gesture, smiling genuinely at Katsuki.
“Thanks Kacchan. For listening.” Izuku said contently.
“Anytime nerd.” Katsuki replied.
The two teens stared at each other unwaveringly for a moment. Red looking into green. Emerald gazing into ruby. Nothing there but two people who cared more about each other than pretty much anyone else in the world. Without noticing, both started to lean in slowly. It was like some force was pulling them together, closer and closer by the millisecond.
Just as Izuku’s freckled nose brushed against the others, the sound of the front door unlocking abruptly shattered the trance they’d just been trapped in. As though suddenly electrified, both boys shot backwards as quickly as humanly possible.
Katsuki’s heart was absolutely pounding. Had they just been about to? Had Izuku and him nearly? No no. It was just a fluke. They were both emotional and Katsuki got ahead of himself. For christ sake Katsuki wasn’t even out yet. And fuck, he didn’t even know if Izuku liked guys!
Plus! What a dick move to try to kiss someone after they just finish telling you the most traumatizing moment of their life. Way to be a pillar of support Katsuki, you fucking prick.
Apprehensively, Katsuki dared a glance at Izuku. He found him already staring back at him with inquisitive eyes. It was almost unnerving, like he was being studied. Before he could think about it too much more though two pairs of foot steps entered the living room.
Aizawa and Hizashi walked in, each with a few grocery bags in hand and looking more relaxed than Katsuki had ever seen either of them. He supposes the only other times he's ever really seen them was at school or that time his family came over for dinner, never a casual Saturday.
“Hey guys. Whatcha doing on the floor?” Hizashi asked, completely oblivious to what had nearly happened just moments ago.
Before Katsuki could stutter out a frankly embarrassing attempt at a response, Izuku stood up confidently and wiped the dust off his pants. “Kacchan and I were just wrestling. I beat him at Mario Kart.” Izuku said cooly, reaching a hand out to help Katsuki off the ground.
Accepting the offered hand, Katuski allowed himself to be pulled up by the shorter boy. Looking down at him, Izuku met his gaze confidently. His eyes sent a message of their own ‘We’ll talk later.’
Katsuki sent the other boy a small nod and steadily wiped the non-existent dust off his jacket. “He did not beat me he fucking cheated. I want a rematch.” He grumbled pettily.
Hizashi laughed softly at their antics and set his own bags down on the counter. “Well, it sounds like you’ve had a fun day. Bakugou, will you be staying for dinner?”
“Nah. I would but I promised my mom I’d be home by 6:00. Something about “quality family time” or whatever.” Katsuki replied with a shrug of his shoulders.
Aizawa walked back in from the other room, putting a gentle arm around Hizashi’s waist. “You better get going then. It's 5:30.” He said coolly.
Looking down at his phone Katsuki realized the man was right. He hadn’t realized just how much time they’d spent talking. “Oh shit you're right.” He said, quickly moving to gather his belongings.
Izuku reached over and handed the blonde his keys from where they’d been sitting on the coffee table. Katsuki accepted them with a gentle look and nod of his own. And if their hands lingered just a millisecond too long nobody was going to point it out.
“Text me if you need anything okay?” Katsuki said quietly. It had been a very emotional day for both of them. It was probably good he wasn’t going to stay for dinner; Katsuki had a lot to unpack and so did Izuku.
“You too.” Izuku replied.
With one last look, Katsuki bowed quickly and respectfully to the family in front of him. “Thanks for having me.” He said confidently.
Hazashi smiled and sent a nod back Katsuki’s way. “You’re welcome back anytime.” He replied happily.
Nodding, Katsuki turned and made his way to the front door. He quickly traded his guest slippers for his own shoes and made his way out the front door. “See you on Monday.”
As soon as the door shut, Aizawa looked over to Izuku. “Alright, so what really happened. You look like you’ve been crying.” He said matter of factly.
Izuku smiled a bit defeatedly and huffed out a good natured laugh. “Still can’t hide anything from you.” He said, turning to look at his dad.
“Of course, you should know better than to try by now.” Aizawa said humorously. “So spill it.”
“It's nothing bad. I just told Kacchan some more details of what went on while we were separated. It got emotional.” Izuku said placatingly.
Aizawa squinted his eyes, looking for any sign of depict or distress. “You’d tell me if something was wrong?” he questioned.
“Of course. I promise, today was really good.” Izuku replied immediately, mumbling the last part fondly to himself.
Aizawa and Hizashi shared a look, the kind only people who are so bonded they can practically read each other's minds can share. A conversation with no words. Soon the conversation ended and Aizawa reached out to ruffle Izuku’s hair tenderly.
“Alright. Come help set the table. We’re having hot pot.”
********
Katsuki made slow work of his walk home. A walk that should have only taken him 20 minutes at best now taking closer to 35. There was just a lot to think about and honestly, the fresh air really helped. Plus, lord knows he needed to get his head screwed on straight before he had to interact with the hag.
Today had been a lot. Even for Katsuki. He was going to need to set up an appointment with his therapist to work through the crushing guilt he was feeling over his own involvement and inaction during Izuku’s year of hell.
He didn’t know. But no matter how hard he tried to twist it in his own mind it just didn’t feel like a valid excuse.
Because he should have known. The pieces were all there and Katsuki knows he’s smart enough to have put them together if he’d cared enough to try even a little bit.
Add onto that the need to confront the fact that he doesn’t know how he would have reacted even if he had known. As much as he’d like to say that he would have helped Izuku and been there for him, he just doesn’t know for sure. Was he that terrible? That if Izuku had come to him for help, he would have ridiculed him instead?
Then there was the fact that he had nearly blown a nuke on everything and kissed Izuku. He’d just been so caught up in the moment. Maybe Izuku had leaned in too, but that could have been for any number of reasons.
Katsuki had known he liked boys since he was just a kid. Plenty of girls had confessed throughout the years, and he truly had no interest. It was just who Katsuki was. Not that he’d told anyone yet.
He could be honest with himself now. He’d always said it was because it was no one else's fucking business. But he’d been scared. Scared of what people would think of him. Scared it would affect his chances of becoming the #1 hero. Sure pride was alive and well but it was still met with its fair share of backlash and ridicule.
Katsuki had only ever wanted to be extraordinary. And for some reason, his mind had convinced him being gay just didn’t fit into that label.
Thinking about it now, how fucking dumb was that?
Plenty of other pro heroes were openly queer. Katsuki was going to be the #1 Pro Hero in Japan, which means he was also going to the the first gay #1 Pro Hero in Japan.
He wasn’t an idiot; He had feelings for Izuku. He’d known that for some time.
He’d never dream of trying anything though. He didn’t deserve Izuku or his affections. He was still building back trust and they were still learning how to be friends again.
No, he wasn’t worthy of Izuku’s love. Not after everything he’d done. And everything he hadn’t.
Still though. The friend Izuku deserved wasn’t someone who was afraid to be themselves just because they were scared of what others might think. Izuku deserved him at his best and his most authentic. Izuku was always being his most authentic self in everything he did, he was confident and brave. It was about time Katsuki started following his example.
Walking up to this front door, Katsuki walked inside with his usual brashness.
“Katsuki is that you? Come set the table.” Mitsuki called from the kitchen.
“Yeah yeah I'm on it.” Katsuki replied, marching into the kitchen and towards the cabinet.
“Did you have a good day at Izuku's?” Masaru asked, walking into the kitchen and grabbing chopsticks from the drawer.
“Yeah. I did.” Katsuki replied, setting down the last plate, he turned to face his parents.
“Look I need to tell you guys something.”